Dance of the Flower Petals Chapter 3: One Year Later, a naruto fanfic

Me: Next chappie! w007!

Sakura: Yeah... GREAT. (sarcasm)

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Touka yawned and stretched her arms, getting up to go to the mirror. She walked to face her -- Sakura's-- reflection. It was weird being someone else, but she was getting used to it over the year in which she'd been in this situation, especially since she had started going around henge'd into her normal self when not doing things that specifically had to be done by Sakura, such as going to the Academy or putting up with Ino. Acting like she normally did after pretending to be Sakura (even if she had slowly changed Sakura's personality over time), it was nice to wind down and pretend she was in her own body.

She brushed Sakura's hair (she refused to think of it as her own, but instead thought of it as 'borrowed') and put it into two high ponytails with black bows, then tied the all-important red ribbon around her neck. She put on a black v-neck t-shirt with the Haruno sign (that white circle sakura's always wearing somewhere) on the front with a fish net shirt underneath and loose black pants. The kunai holster on Touka's right leg was red like her ribbon. Pull on a red pair those weird shoes all ninja seem to wear (she hated the way they looked, but she had been pleasantly surprised to find that they were very comfortable), Yaezaki Touka was ready to take the gennin exams as someone she wasn't.

"Sa-ku-ra," Kuroko said for the five millionth time, "Put down my doujinshi and get over here. I need to show you this."

"No," Sakura said stubbornly. While in Touka's body, she was currently henge'd into herself, which she found less awkward than looking like someone she'd never met. "You finally got me into yaoi, so I'm not putting this down until I finish it."

"Sakura." Kuroko repeated. "This is serious."

Sakura made a face. "Ohh, fine then." she put Kuroko's SasuNaru doujinshi down and walks over to the computer Kuroko is sitting in front of.

The computer's set to Youtube, and 'Naruto Episode 1'. It's stuck in the beginning of the episode.

"It's changed," Kuroko whispered. "Watch this..."

((a/n: 'sakura' is really touka in sakura's body. most of the time, though, touka will be referred to as touka)

"Sakura Haruno!" Umino Iruka called from the testing room. "Come in and take your exam!"

"Hai, sensei!" 'Sakura' walked in, trying her hardest not to bounce around like she would naturally. It was something Touka was known for, in fact. She had little to no attention span and often randomly felt the need to skip around in a circle. If it weren't for Inner Sakura's constant reminders, Touka would probably be locked up in the Konoha psyche ward.

Let's ace this thingy and get the hell out of this classroom, Inner Sakura advised.

The test consisted of a few basic ninjutsu and taijutsu, along with the bunshin techinique and the henge (which are, of course, both genjutsu). Touka, thanks to Inner Sakura's coaching (and wheedling several various ninja for help when she got stuck), passed with flying colors. She got a hitai-ate with a black cloth, which she tied on her forehead, but it felt weird, so she put it on top of her head, headband-style, like the real Sakura did.

"Thanks, Iruka-sensei!" Touka chirped, skipping out of the testing room. She went back to sit next to Yamanaka Ino and one Hyuuga Hinata.

"How'd you do?" Hinata asked shyly, fiddling with the hitai-ate in her hands. Touka had pointed out to Ino how Hinata was even shyer than Sakura had been when she was little, and so Ino had decided that "Hinata needs help. I'll lend her some of my Yamanaka brand confidence! Which, by the way, is also the reason Sasuke will pick me over you."

"I went through that test like Naruto goes through a bowl of ramen," Touka joked, tightening her new hitai-ate. Ino smirked at this, and Hinata giggled softly.

"He eats pretty fast, doesn't he?" she mused.

'Sakura' smirked at Hinata's comment. "You would know... stalker."

Hinata looked away embarrassed. "Am I really?" she whispered.

Touka shook her head frantically. "You just... ah... I was teasing!"

Ino rolled her eyes. "Since when did you care about insulting people, Sakura? Hinata, don't listen to her. She's an idiot."

"Care to say that again, PIG?"

"Ino-pig sounds kinda like you there, Kuro-chan," Sakura teased.

Kuroko glared. "Shut up."

The bell rang and every person in the classroom ran out, except for Naruto. He walked somberly through the door to sit on the swing, like he had done the year before. And the year before that.

He watched as graudating students were congratulated by their familes. Why was Naruto so alone?

"NARUU-CHAAAAAN!" a flash of orange and brown ran straight into him on purpose, causing him to almost lose his balance, then falling to the ground in a heap.

"T-Touka-chan," Naruto said, looking down at the girl who had just glomped him, more than slightly weirded out. Touka was a weird girl whose hobby seemed to be hugging people, in addition to the fact that she seemed to always be eating junk food of some sort.

"Hiya!" Touka greeted, holding up two frozen treats on sticks. "It's a frozen yogurt bar! Want one? I only paid for half of these but the guy running the cart let me have another one just 'cause I'm so cute."

Naruto glared at her. "You've been stealing food again, haven't you?"

Touka pouted. "You saying I'm not cute?"

"You're the farthest thing from cute!" Naruto yelled hotly.

"What... is... she... DOING?" Sakura yelled.

Kuroko shrugged. "Tou-chan has a selection of people who she hugs on sight. She's probably added more than Naruto to her list this past year."

Sakura shivered. "I hope for her own safety that Sasuke isn't one of those people."

After Kuroko had forced Sakura to read the entire Naruto manga that was out so far, and Sakura had watched herself get knocked out by Sasuke and left on a bench (several times, because she didn't beleive it at first), she'd been emo for three weeks, then depressed. And the thing to bring her out of her despair was...

SasuNaru yaoi. At first, she had only read it because in SasuNaru, Sasuke always came back, but after awhile, she'd became more and more obsessed with it. It was her anti-depressant. Haruno Sakura: rabid yaoi fangirl number four (kuroko gave sakura this title- she was number one and Touka was number two. Number three was one of Kuroko and Touka's friends, Kei.) After Sakura's conversion to yaoi-ism, she had also been made a part of the (strange and relatively new) Otaku Clan, which was in essence, more like a club of people who made fun of Sasuke all day.

When Sasuke was not participating in SasuNaru, she hated his guts with, as Kei had put it, 'enough hatred to make Itachi high.'

"Trust me, Sasuke isn't. She hates people like him," Kuroko chuckled.

Sakura smirked. "She's friends with YOU, isn't she?"

The Sasuke-look-alike rolled her eyes in exasperation. "I only look like him. I'm not emo!"

Sakura giggled. "You have a good point, there."

Touka skipped along the road of Konoha, in disguise as, well, herself, holding a bag of cookies.

'I love being a ninja,' she thought, 'I can eat anything I want and just work it off later training, so there is no limit to the junk food I may consume!'

Kicking ass has its perks, Inner Sakura agreed. Shouldn't you be, like, annoying someone right now? That's what you usually do this time of day.

'Saving my energy. I have... plans for this day,' Touka explained, smirking.

Trying to sound evil doesn't work on me, Tou-baka. I can read your mind... Inner Sakura paused, leafing through Touka's brain to find out what exactly these 'plans' of her were. ...THAT'S what you're going to do?

'Yep!'

... You idiot. You're going to die.

'Now you sound like Sasuke,' Touka teased.

BE SILENT, SHANNAROU!

"Oh, great," Kuroko sighed. "What's she up to now? That idiot."

Sakura sweatdropped. "You really are a lot like Sasuke, Kuro-chan... and not in a good way," She laughed.

"Well, if I was like him in a good way, you'd be all fangirl on me, wouldn't you?" Kuroko pointed out. "Just because he's similiar to me."

"Well..." Sakura grinned sheepishly. "The person I was when I first came here... probably."

Kuroko smirked. "And that, Sakura, is why I've made sure you changed during your time here so far."

Touka was (still henge'd as herself and) sitting on the roof next to the Hokage's office when Naruto ran out the window.

Shannarou! There he goes, go catch him!

'Right.' Touka jumped from roof to roof in pursuit of the dead-last blondie.

"Hmmm... for the first jutsu..." Naruto opened the scroll and started reading. "A bunshin technique?" he made a face. "But I'm no good at those..."

"NARU-CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!" Touka ran up and tackled him. "Watcha got there Naru-chan? A jutsu scroll?"

"Shhh!" Naruto said. "If I can learn a jutsu before they catch me, then I'll pass the gennin exams!"

Touka nodded excitedly. "Good on you! Can I watch?"

"Of course!" Naruto bragged. "Just don't talk!" he started reading the scroll, and Touka read over his shoulder. She pulled a bag of yogurt-covvered pretzels from her bag and munched quietly.

"She's trying to learn kage-bunshin," Kuroko realized.

Sakura nodded. "Looks like it."

"Okay..." Naruto mused. "That makes sense! I could so do this!"

"Go for it Naruto!" Touka cheered. Shannarou! It's your damn signature move so I'm glad you finally learned it!

"Ah-ha! Found you." Iruka appeared from the shadows.

Naruto grinned. "Iruka-sensei! I learned a jutsu, that's means I can graduate, right?"

The brown-haired chuunin's eyebrows furrowed. "Who told you that?"

Touka spoke up. "Mizuki-san told him. I'm going to assume you're the great Iruka whom Naruto and Sakura have told me so much about?" Okay, Touka-chan, keep flattering him and maybe he won't--

"You're not one of my students," Iruka mused. "And you were reading the scroll over Naruto's shoulder. What's going on?"

Touka giggled. "I'm... someone who likes playing with chakra. I wanted to see what Naru-chan here was reading, and this one jutsu looked pretty interesting. I didn't know this method of passing the gennin exams was closed from commoner's input."

"And how would a civilian girl know how to use chakra? You really ought to be taken to the Hokage about becoming a ninja if you can. This village can use all the help it can take." Mizuki's voice snorted from above them in the trees. "In addition, the exam was something I made up to get Naruto to steal the scroll, which is forbidden."

Mizuki's face became visible. At that instant-

"Oh Maybelline! Why can't you be true? Oh Maybelline! Why can't you be true?"

Music was blasting all around them. The missing-nin wannabe looked arounmd frantically. "Where's that music coming from?!?"

Sakura sweatdropped. "Isn't that a Beatles song?" Touka's friend Banshou had forced Sakura to listen to every Beatles song she had (which was almost every Beatles song to be had), along with several other songs she thought Sakura should know.

"Touka has her own soundtrack!" Kuroko laughed.

Touka smirked. The Beatles music was, in fact, something she had figured out. It was, you might say, her own genjutsu technique. And it was so much more convinient than a CD player or even an iPod, because it wasn't something she had to carry around that she didn't usually. She stored all of her music in her brain. Touka had also found that concentrating chakra into her ears and head helped her remember things better, which was good because this world she was in was full of lots of good music, but she didn't know any of it because the artists and songs were all different.

"I said I enjoy playing with chakra, didn't I?" Touka's voice echoed all around the clearing, from every possible direction. "Genjutsu is a part of the things you can use for playing with it. Now, if you'll excuse me..."

Touka dissappeared in a puff of smoke and was replaced with a pink stuffed rabbit.

"That's so cute!" Sakura said. "I want one!"

"That's an Usa-chan. You can find one in any anime store that sells Ouran High Host Club merchandise," Kuroko informed her.

"What was that?" Mizuku said, dumbfounded.

Iruka sweatdropped. "It was a genjutsu. Didn't you hear...?"

Naruto picked up the scroll (and the pink stuffed rabbit) and ran.

Touka giggled, leaving the scene of Mizuki's revelation. Once she was a safe distance away...

"Kage bunshin no jutsu!" A second Touka appeared next to her. "Henge!"

The original Touka transformed into Sakura.

"This'll work," they told each other. "Let's go hit that party!"

Touka and 'Sakura' ran in the direction of Ino's house.

"So that's what she was up to," Kuroko noted. "She's got two clones so both Sakura and Touka can be at some party."

Sakura sweatdropped. "That seems a little much just for a party. Couldn't she have just said one of them was sick?"

The rest of the episode played out like normal. Naruto used kage bunshin to extreme lengths, beat up Mizuki, got his headband, and got Iruka to promise to buy him ramen to celebrate. Everyone went home happy (except Mizuki, who went to jail).

Then, the 'next time on Naruto' showed up.

'Who is that kid and why is he following me? HEY! Touka-chan, if you're going to insult my jutsu then why don't YOU try it?'

The screen first showed Konohamaru stalking Naruto, but then it showed Touka hitting a sexy-jutsu'd Naruto over the head with a rolled-up magazine and shaking her head.

"She's going to mess with the oiroke no jutsu?" Kuroko laughed. "Maybe she'll make it yaoi..."

"That, I'd like to see," Sakura chuckled.

"Naruto, you IDIOT!" Touka hit Naruto (the nekkid chick) over the head. "You can't practice jutsu in a place this public, someone will see them and copy them!"

Konohamaru stared at Touka. "I don't know who wyou are, but it's impossible to just copy someone's jutsu after only seeing it once!"

Touka rolled her eyes. "Oh, really? HENGE!"

And so, in the middle of a clooud of smoke, was a guy wearing only a pair of little grey boxers. His orange hair was long enough to braid and still hit his butt when he ran, nd his eyes were a mysterioous dark blue.

He grinned sexily at Naruto. "Well hello there."

Naruto felt his face heating up. 'What's going on? I'm a guy. I can't like guys!'

And yet, both Naruto and Konohamaru both rocketed back from nosebleeds.

"See? Sexy Jutsu, Yaoi addition," Kuroko chuckled.

"WOOHOO! You go girl!" Sakura said to Touka on the screen.

The guy sneezed, poofed back into Touka. "See? If you've got the right tricks up your sleeve, you CAN copy people's jutsu in just one go."

Touka, how many times did you try that jutsu in front of the mirror? Pervert.

'HEY! I always left the boxers on! And as long as he thinks this is the first time I've done this, it's okay!' Touka sighed. "In addition, my friends, your usage is extremely weak. You poses are not arousing, they're cute like puppy dogs. The voice is pretty good, but you really need to work on your expressions."

"It's MY jutsu, why should I listen to YOU to improve it?" Naruto yelled.

Touka rolled her eyes. "Because my rendition affected YOU, even though your actions of turning-into-a-nude-girl would make someone pretty sure you're straight, dearie. Also, because I'm probably more perverted than you." she nodded to herself. "The only bigger pervert than myself whom I've met is my friend Kuro-chan back home."

"I'm no perv! Not when compared to her!" Kuroko grolwed. "Tooooouuuukaaaaa!"

Sakura smirked at her. "Remind me, which of the two of you doesn't like 'M' rated fics?"

"Touka-chan..." Kuroko mumbled. "That's Touka-chan."

"And who likes to read them?"

"I do..." Kuroko admitted.

"Then who's the bigger pervert?" Sakura asked.

"The one who is almost constantly seen with a red face, the one who thinks about these things mroe often. That's got Touka-chan written all over it!" Kuroko said.

"... I'm supposed to pretend to be this person?" Sakura asked.

Kuroko's eyes widened. "Yep! Oh gosh, what if Touka finds out her body was emo?"

Both girls stared at each other, then burst out laughing.

Touka smirked. "The usage a jutsu so sexy, it turns the straight ones gay and the gay ones straight! If you can make it a pretty boy then you're SET!" she pumped the air with her first.

"She needs to get over her Haku obsession," Kuroko laughed.

"Oh, that's why she made the hair long?" Sakura asked.

The Sasuke-clone smirked and nodded. "Probably."

Naruto sweatdropped. "I'd rather henge into a nude girl. No offense."

Touka shrugged. "And that's just fine! But seriously, your 'come hither' face needs work. And now, if you'll excuse me, I must now go torture someone else!" she giggled at this as skipped away.

After Touka's interference, Konohamaru and Naruto paid special attention to their expressions.

Needless to say, when Ebisu showed up, he was put into the hospital for noseblood loss.

"I'm here!" Touka said frantically, catching up to Ino, Hinata, and 'Sakura' the shadow clone.

"Toooouuukaaa! You're late!" Ino and 'Sakura' growled simultaneously.

Touka just giggled. "I ran into Naruto, so I had to correct something he'd messed up. My bad! Let's get shopping."

"Is that why we're meeting?" Hinata asked. "To go shopping?"

Touka grinned evilly. "No, Hinata," she chuckled. "We're giving you a makeover."

Me: Well, that's a wrap! Thanks for bothering to review, especially if the Sexy Jutsu content annoyed you.

Sakura: why didn't you just turn into Sasuke?

Inner Sakura: yeah! that would have more of an affect on Naruto.

Me: Because if I turned into Sasuke, I'd feel dirty for the rest of my life. Next time, on 'Dance of the Flower Petals! It's episode three, every yaoi-fangirls' favorite episode (except mine. I like the episode where HAKU WEARS PINK)! How will Touka screw THIS up? Also, the infamous bells test! What'll happen now? Only one way to find out. READ AND REVIEW!