Ranma the Amorous Over-sexed Nympho
The woman returned a polite smile to the passer-by, as she walked down the sideway while shifting the long bundle in her arms that was wrapped in fine rice cloth. She was a beautiful woman, which she knew, not even needing the confirmation of a couple weeks prior. That young handsome man that had hit on her did much to boost her confidence, though. She also hadn't ever felt so tempted, but she would remain faithful to her husband.
For this, she had remarkable willpower, restraining herself from adultery for ten... very... *very*... long years. Fortunately she had her job working at a small but bustling novelty shop and hobbies that kept her occupied, such as gardening, various female pen pals in which she used recycled paper to address them, cooking, and such that most common Japanese housewives partook. Also, the letters she received from Genma to give her comfort on nights she thought to be by herself, helped alleviate any loneliness she felt.
But the letters had not been coming for a sizable amount of time, and with this, Nodoka Saotome started to become concerned. This was the reason she had decided to visit an old friend and training partner of her husband's, Soun Tendou.
The auburn haired woman walked down the stairs that would lead to the subway trains. She knew Kimiko and Soun had three beautiful daughters that she had yet to meet; it was silly for her to take so long to do so.
Sure she may not have been close to Soun or Kimiko; with Soun always with Genma to the point where she had to wonder about those two (though any decisions her dear Husband Genma made, she would support fully and lovingly), and her and Kimiko just not getting around to seeing one another. Though last she saw Kimiko, the Tendou wife had parted with heartfelt words such as, "You idiotic and delusional space cadet with so little significant matter between the ears that the cranium was strictly for ornamental display who should have her tubes tied and effectively remove herself from the gene pool for the general sake of humanity."
It was silly for Nodoka to hold such a childish grudge for so long, and besides that, Kimiko had yet to apologize for those unkind words.
The woman carried herself in a regal fashion onto the public transportation, and was fortunate enough to find a seat. Maybe Soun knew the whereabouts of her wayward husband. They were always so close. Hopefully, at least he could give her a vague idea where he may have headed to or last been, she didn't want to consider that her husband or her son were now with their ancestors. She didn't want to wait any longer.
She turned in her seat a bit to the side, unnoticing the train full of eyes that seemed to follow her motion. It wasn't uncommon to get such stares, she really liked to wear beautiful kimonos for the stares she received, and she liked to remind other people of Japan's lovely history and culture in some small part by her outfits. Nodoka shifted her long package in her arms, and as she did so, most the men and a few women watched very carefully, and a few gave pleasant shudders at the action.
Nodoka returned the smile of one glassy eyed subway patron, though not as goofy as she received.
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"I trust you enjoyed yourself?" Cologne asked, not bothering to look towards her Great Granddaughter. Shampoo gave a mute nod, her face still stuck with the dazed look she's worn since leaving the Tendou household.
"It's good that you're finding married life so... fulfilling." Shampoo tripped on her way up the stairs, and didn't even bother getting up from where she was, before falling asleep.
"Ahhh, newlyweds..."
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"Ranma-sama, don't you think we're pushing her a bit too much?" Akane asked timidly. Shampoo seemed to have lost a lot of her exuberance since after the ordeal with Mousse.
"Na, we're just making up for lost time," Onna-Ranma stated casually, before turning to walk away from the Cat Cafe, "She'll be happier for it."
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"Great Grandmother," Shampoo called out in her native language, too tired to concentrate on speaking Japanese, "Will my sphincter dilate back to normal size soon?"
"Give it a few hours, Shampoo. Did you make sure you removed all of the potato? It would be unsanitary if you did not."
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Ranma sighed as they walked down the road, everything was at peace. Akane was by her side, Dr. Tofu and Kasumi were together, Ukyo and Ryoga have been quiet as of late, Mousse hasn't been seen for a few days, Shampoo was now participating in their activities, and Ranma-chan herself felt satisfied. Everything was beautiful.
They passed by the park, and Ranma-chan stopped at the sight if a young girl with a pigtail tripping and falling. Quickly, the girl's mother was there to comfort the now crying child, holding her in an embrace full of love and protection.
Akane caught the redhead's wistful look at the scene, "Something wrong? Ranma-Sama?"
Ranma sighed again, "No, nothing important." The redhead continued walking, as Akane stood with a contemplative expression.
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"We're bac-WULF!!!!!" The air left the pigtailed girl's lungs, as she was slammed into by a black and blur. Akane stood, blinking in confusion as she watched the redhead being carried away underarm by her transformed father. With a guileless expression on her face, the raven-haired girl picked up a large rock, tossed it in her hand once, and then lunged it at the speeding panda.
"Thanks, wonder what's with Panda-chan?" Akane only shrugged in response.
"Well," Soun's voice continued, "It has been a while, Nodoka. And what brings us the pleasure of your visit?"
"Well, it's embarrassing, really, but I was hoping perhaps you could tell me the whereabouts of Genma and Ranma? Perhaps any clue that may at least give me a location to begin searching?"
"Oh, no need to worry!" Soun said cheerfully, "They're right..." and small automobile came crashing through the wall, landing on the Tendou Patriarch."
"My, people should be careful where they park their vehicles," the woman stated with slight distaste.
"Hmm, what's up? Pops never hefts anything past his own bodyweight unless in immediate danger," Ranma-chan mused suspiciously.
"Oh dear, I suppose I will have to wait until Tendou-san recovers. I was so looking forward to finding out where Genma and Ranma were. He seems to know."
"Oh, you're searching for Uncle Saotome and Ranma-kun?" Kasumi asked cheerfully as she walked into the living room.
Nodoka turned to the lovely lady who opened the door and gave that... interesting... fact about her suitor, "So they have been here?"
"Oh yes, in fact they're..."
A panda on a unicycle blowing a loud trumpet juggling bowling pins rode through the living room with a sign around it's neck saying, "[LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME! Don't pay attention to her!!!]"
"Uh, what do you think you're doing Po..." A bowling pin colliding heavily enough to render unconsciousness to a cranium interrupted the redhead.
"[Whoops, clumsy me,]" The panda's sign said as it's head was bowed sheepishly.
"My, what an incredible panda," Nodoka stated with awe, "You have him trained so well!"
"Oh my, that's no a panda, that's..."
The Panda bowed after it's spectacular drum solo on the full drum set, "[let's hear it for Mr. PANDA!!!!]"
Kasumi and Nabiki held up lit lighters and waved them in the air.
"Mr. Panda," Nodoka repeated out loud.
"What the HELL you do that for, Panda-chan?" Onna-Ranma said in a growl.
"Oh my, you get the feeling Mr. Saotome's trying to hide something?" Kasumi leaned over and asked her sister Akane.
"That is such improper language for a young lady," the visiting woman reprimanded the redhead.
"Huh? But..."
"No buts, and your attire!"
"What? What's wrong with my clothes?" Ranma asked defensively
"You're dressed like such a tomboy! How do you expect to catch a boyfriend as you are?"
"Believe me, there isn't a problem with that one," Nabiki stated dryly.
Nodoka was scandalized, "You mean, you are of loose morals?"
Ranma blinked a couple of times.
"Young lady, what is your name?"
"Uh, Ran.."
::WHACK::
"Ranko Tendou?" The matronly woman read from the sign that collided with the back of the girl's head. The panda nodded furiously.
"Okay Panda-chan you're DEAD!" The redhead growled ferally at the now cowering panda. A firm hand grabbing onto her shirt collar arrested her leap.
"Now, now, it's not proper for a young lady to act so," Nodoka struck a dramatic pose, while cradling her ever present long bundle under her arms, "I shall teach you the proper ways of womanhood! This I vow!"
"Good, we can start with anatomy," Ranma-chan chirped.
Nodoka's glare turned disapproving, "yes, let's. I notice you're not wearing a bra."
"Well, I like the jiggling sensation," Ranma-chan replied, "And Akane and Nabiki don't seem to mind." Akane blushed while Nabiki openly stared.
"That's no excuse! Now why don't you go and put one on? You'll feel a lot more comfortable, I assure you."
"Uh, but I don't have any."
"Um, Ran...ko-sama, er, Ranko is our cousin from up north, she's a little, um, uncivil." Akane added stated cautiously. Genma didn't want this woman to know about Ranma or him, and until she found out the reason, she'd play along. Nabiki looked sideways at her sister, wondering why she was participating in this deception.
"Ranko, who the hell is Ranko?" Ranma-chan almost shouted.
"Language! Young lady!" Nodoka chided again, this was going to be a lot of work rehabilitating this lost soul in the arts of proper womanhood, "I think we'll first go shopping."
Ranma looked at the woman warily, while the panda had a panic attack.
"Oh dear, I think Mr. Panda is choking on something!" Akane moved towards the panda, acting like she was going to tend to it.
She started patting it on the back, and whispered to it, "Okay, *Panda-chan*, spill it."
"[Akane, you must NOT let Ranma reveal himself or find out that that's his mom, it's a matter of LIFE and DEATH!]"
Akane raised an eyebrow at the sign he was coyly only allowing her to see, "Aren't you being a little dramatic? You don't expect me to take this seriously, do you?"
"[As serious as a belly slitting!]"
"Huh?"
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"Okay, what's Panda-chan's excuse?" Ranma asked with a withering glance towards Akane.
The raven-haired girl looked towards the matronly woman in front of them, and spoke when she was sure she wasn't paying attention, "Forgive me, Ranma-sama, but it's for your own good."
"And since when have you been deciding what's good for me?" the redhead replied, raising an eyebrow. Akane looked down at her with a frightened nervousness, like she had just overstepped her bounds dramatically. Ranma-chan sighed, the girl's confidence was just finally starting to build back up too.
"Alright, if you want me to continue this charade, I'll do it for you, not the panda."
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It didn't take long at all to get into the charade.
"Oooh, this is nice! Can you hold this for me, Akane?" The girl in question mutely took the article of cloth (clothing would be too generous a description), while still covering her face with her other hand.
"What's wrong, Akane-chan? Is there anything you would like to try out?" Nodoka asked kindly.
"Uh, that's... okay," the raven haired girl replied from under her hand, "and, can you stop using my name in here, please?"
"Akane! This would just look great on you!" Ranma-chan said, holding up a golden yellow strip."
"I have to agree with Ranko-chan, you would look nice in that." Nodoka urged; she didn't want the other Tendou girl to feel left out.
"I'll... take your word for it, Ranko-sam... Ranko."
"Really, Akane," 'Ranko' chided, "We finally have someone old enough to make purchases for us in these stores, and you're just not being accommodating."
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At the next store...
"So, if you press this button, it makes the nipples vibrate?"
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And the one after that...
"Your usual 15% discount, Nodoka-chan?"
_______________________________________________
Akane covered her head, as they sat in the food court for an early dinner, she just couldn't directly look the redhead in the face.
"Now, are you not feeling much better in that bra?" Nodoka asked 'Ranko'.
The girl in question quite happily nodded, and pulled on the straps of her bra, causing the pitch of the vibrations to change slightly, "You're right, they feel much better now! Thanks... uh..."
"You know? I just realized, I never told you my name!" Nodoka stated a bit shamefaced, "You can call me Sao..."
"YOU GOING TO EAT THAT?" Akane yelled, pointing to Nodoka's plate.
"Akane-chan, it's not nice for you to interrupt like that.
"I'm sorry, auntie." Akane apologized, again seeming to regress into herself.
Nodoka had a dazed look on her face, she liked 'Auntie'.
"Are you okay, Akane?" the redhead asked a bit concerned.
"Uh, yeah, I'm okay, I guess."
"Come to think of it, you have been looking rather flushed the whole trip," Nodoka replied with her own concern, "I think we've done enough shopping for today. We're not far from my home, why don't we go there to try on your new clothes and some tea; possibly something for Akane to help her calm down?"
"Huh? Calm down?"
"I guess," Ranma replied, looking down at the five bags of clothing she had with her.
"Um, I'm not sure that's such a good idea..." Akane stated nervously, "We should probably head back home before they start to wonder what happened to me and Ranm-Ranko."
"Nonsense, you can call them from my phone. I'm sure they won't mind if you were out a little longer."
"Well, we don't want to impose on you," Akane attempted to argue.
"Pish-posh, this has been a great day for this lonely old woman. At least allow the pleasure of spending more of my company with you two."
"I... I..." Akane couldn't say no to the woman, "I guess, for a little while."
"Good, let's gather your belongings, we have a few blocks to walk."
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Ranma walked around; there was a surreal familiarity with it all. Akane watched Ranma warily, in case something clicked.
"You have a nice place, Auntie."
"Thank you, though it's rather small, I'm afraid. When me and Gen..."
"*COUGH* *COUGH*, I think I may need that tea after all," Akane interrupted, sniffling a bit.
"Oh my, hold on a second, and I will bring you a cold remedy."
Akane's head slumped in relief, as Ranma continued to look around.
"This is weird..."
"What is, Ranm-Ranko?"
"I feel almost as if I've been here before..."
"*KAFF COUCH HACK*!!!"
Ranma was by Akane's side immediately, "You okay, Akane-chan?"
"Yeah, just... *kaff* ... some spit down the wrong pipe."
"I've returned, and the water for the tea should be about done," Nodoka stated, "Just take this with the tea, and you should be fine. It's a good thing we caught this early."
Akane graciously accepted a glass of water and the cold remedy. Ranma-chan eyed the three cups on the table warily, as their host went to retrieve the tea.
"Is there something wrong, Ranko-chan?" Nodoka asked at the redhead's curious expression.
"I'm... not up for tea, heh... heh..."
"Oh, please try some, it's one of my favorite blends!" She poured the tea in a cup, and handed it to the redhead, "Go on now, try it!"
Ranma gulped, and *very carefully brought the steaming cup to her mouth.
"It is good, isn't it?"
"Oh yes, nice," Ranma replied, being careful to set the tea down gently. Akane let out a breath she didn't even know she was holding.
"I'm glad you like it, there's a store around the corner that carries it. I haven't been able to find it anywhere else."
"That's interesting, Auntie."
"Now, I have to ask, what was it like for you growing up, Ranko?" Nodoka had set the perfect instance to start correcting the girl of her bad habits, but first she had to learn a bit about her background.
"Uhhhhh, well me and Pops had been training in the martial arts since I could start walking."
"My, that's impressive," Nodoka stated cheerfully, inside she was cringing, no wonder this girl was an absolute tomboy.
"Yeah, but recently I started picking up another art, one I wouldn't mind showing to you," Ranma stated with a smoky grin. Akane groaned.
"How nice, would you be willing to give me a demonstration?" Nodoka wasn't really focusing on the redhead, but considering how to break her out of unladylike habits; perhaps if she were more interested in this 'other art', it would be a more acceptable avenue than fighting.
"Oh, certainly!" Ranma replied, leaning forward onto the table, and not paying attention to where her elbow landed.
"OW! HOT!" A masculine voice screamed out.
"AUNTIE! WHO'S THAT?" Akane shouted quickly, while pointing to a random picture. She squeaked in horror when she realized who it was.
Nodoka quickly turned in shock at the girl's outburst to the picture, and got a wistful smile on her face, "Oh, that's of my dear son Ranma when he was but only three. He was such an energetic boy. I'm sure he became a fine young man." The woman turned back, and blinked at the sight of Akane staring back with a sickly grin on her face, with her glass held out at an angle as if it had had it's contents tossed out. The raven-haired girl seemed to be squirming at the intense scrutiny of the redhead. Said redhead hadn't caught what the woman had said, more angered at Akane for drenching her and the poor woman's floor.
"Oh, Akane-chan, that wasn't very nice."
"It, um, kind of slipped," Akane's sickly grin never wavered.
"Well, there's nothing that can be done about it, out of those wet cloths before you catch..."
Nodoka realized the girl was a natural redhead.
"...cold"
"You like what you see?" Ranma-chan asked in a sultry voice.
"You are a healthy young woman, but it won't help if you are standing nude. You may catch Akane-chan's cold."
Both girls face faulted.
"Come along to my room, I have a few things you can wear while these hang to dry. I'm afraid that you'll have to stay the night. I'll call your home and let them know."
"Swell, just swell," Akane mumbled to herself. Ranma-chan had the tell tale manic grin that told everyone that she was about to get some.
_______________________________________________
Ranma walked into the room wearing rather racy sleeping lingerie that Nodoka had loaned her, and plopped onto the second futon their hostess had set out for them. She wasn't in the best of moods.
"Nice lady, but completely oblivious. Even Kasumi got the hint on the first try!"
"Don't worry about it and just go to sleep, Ranma-sama," Akane inwardly cheered, the less time the woman spent with Ranma, the less chance there was of something slipping.
"I wonder what her name is? I never got it."
"Just call her 'Auntie'."
"I guess, but it doesn't sound quite right to me." With that, Ranma lay down and attempted to drift to sleep.
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Ranma woke up in a dreamlike state, the early dinner left her feeling kind of hungry. In a peculiar familiarity, she navigated to the kitchen and grabbed something while barely awake. Even mostly asleep, she polished the piece of fruit off, and then staggered back down a familiar route to go back to bed. One that was familiar, but not the way to get back to the guest room.
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"I feel refreshed!" Akane stated, as she stretched for the morning. She looked towards Ranma's futon, finding the redhead missing, "Ranma?"
She got up and looked through the small place, not finding any trace of her, and finally decided to ask Nodoka what may have happened. She walked to the main bedroom, and found the door wide open. She walked in, and almost bumped into the dresser that was right next to the entrance. Akane turned to it, and her eyes went wide at it's contents; she would think people would keep *those* items in the bottom drawer, at least!
She quietly closed the drawer, and then turned to the bed, "Auntie, have..."
Auntie seemed to have the same sleeping habits Ranma had. Like for instance, the particular habit of kicking off *all* their clothes so they were nude. It was easily comparable, as Ranma was laying next to her in the same condition. What made it a bit disconcerting was the fact that they were almost in a light embrace, with their legs tangled together.
Akane reassessed what she thought of Nodoka's sleeping habits, as it might not have been accidental, seeing as one of the objects (a rather long one and double sided one at that) was laying behind her.
Nodoka awoke, and blinked at whom she had her hands gently holding onto...
The woman returned a polite smile to the passer-by, as she walked down the sideway while shifting the long bundle in her arms that was wrapped in fine rice cloth. She was a beautiful woman, which she knew, not even needing the confirmation of a couple weeks prior. That young handsome man that had hit on her did much to boost her confidence, though. She also hadn't ever felt so tempted, but she would remain faithful to her husband.
For this, she had remarkable willpower, restraining herself from adultery for ten... very... *very*... long years. Fortunately she had her job working at a small but bustling novelty shop and hobbies that kept her occupied, such as gardening, various female pen pals in which she used recycled paper to address them, cooking, and such that most common Japanese housewives partook. Also, the letters she received from Genma to give her comfort on nights she thought to be by herself, helped alleviate any loneliness she felt.
But the letters had not been coming for a sizable amount of time, and with this, Nodoka Saotome started to become concerned. This was the reason she had decided to visit an old friend and training partner of her husband's, Soun Tendou.
The auburn haired woman walked down the stairs that would lead to the subway trains. She knew Kimiko and Soun had three beautiful daughters that she had yet to meet; it was silly for her to take so long to do so.
Sure she may not have been close to Soun or Kimiko; with Soun always with Genma to the point where she had to wonder about those two (though any decisions her dear Husband Genma made, she would support fully and lovingly), and her and Kimiko just not getting around to seeing one another. Though last she saw Kimiko, the Tendou wife had parted with heartfelt words such as, "You idiotic and delusional space cadet with so little significant matter between the ears that the cranium was strictly for ornamental display who should have her tubes tied and effectively remove herself from the gene pool for the general sake of humanity."
It was silly for Nodoka to hold such a childish grudge for so long, and besides that, Kimiko had yet to apologize for those unkind words.
The woman carried herself in a regal fashion onto the public transportation, and was fortunate enough to find a seat. Maybe Soun knew the whereabouts of her wayward husband. They were always so close. Hopefully, at least he could give her a vague idea where he may have headed to or last been, she didn't want to consider that her husband or her son were now with their ancestors. She didn't want to wait any longer.
She turned in her seat a bit to the side, unnoticing the train full of eyes that seemed to follow her motion. It wasn't uncommon to get such stares, she really liked to wear beautiful kimonos for the stares she received, and she liked to remind other people of Japan's lovely history and culture in some small part by her outfits. Nodoka shifted her long package in her arms, and as she did so, most the men and a few women watched very carefully, and a few gave pleasant shudders at the action.
Nodoka returned the smile of one glassy eyed subway patron, though not as goofy as she received.
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"I trust you enjoyed yourself?" Cologne asked, not bothering to look towards her Great Granddaughter. Shampoo gave a mute nod, her face still stuck with the dazed look she's worn since leaving the Tendou household.
"It's good that you're finding married life so... fulfilling." Shampoo tripped on her way up the stairs, and didn't even bother getting up from where she was, before falling asleep.
"Ahhh, newlyweds..."
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"Ranma-sama, don't you think we're pushing her a bit too much?" Akane asked timidly. Shampoo seemed to have lost a lot of her exuberance since after the ordeal with Mousse.
"Na, we're just making up for lost time," Onna-Ranma stated casually, before turning to walk away from the Cat Cafe, "She'll be happier for it."
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"Great Grandmother," Shampoo called out in her native language, too tired to concentrate on speaking Japanese, "Will my sphincter dilate back to normal size soon?"
"Give it a few hours, Shampoo. Did you make sure you removed all of the potato? It would be unsanitary if you did not."
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Ranma sighed as they walked down the road, everything was at peace. Akane was by her side, Dr. Tofu and Kasumi were together, Ukyo and Ryoga have been quiet as of late, Mousse hasn't been seen for a few days, Shampoo was now participating in their activities, and Ranma-chan herself felt satisfied. Everything was beautiful.
They passed by the park, and Ranma-chan stopped at the sight if a young girl with a pigtail tripping and falling. Quickly, the girl's mother was there to comfort the now crying child, holding her in an embrace full of love and protection.
Akane caught the redhead's wistful look at the scene, "Something wrong? Ranma-Sama?"
Ranma sighed again, "No, nothing important." The redhead continued walking, as Akane stood with a contemplative expression.
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"We're bac-WULF!!!!!" The air left the pigtailed girl's lungs, as she was slammed into by a black and blur. Akane stood, blinking in confusion as she watched the redhead being carried away underarm by her transformed father. With a guileless expression on her face, the raven-haired girl picked up a large rock, tossed it in her hand once, and then lunged it at the speeding panda.
"Thanks, wonder what's with Panda-chan?" Akane only shrugged in response.
"Well," Soun's voice continued, "It has been a while, Nodoka. And what brings us the pleasure of your visit?"
"Well, it's embarrassing, really, but I was hoping perhaps you could tell me the whereabouts of Genma and Ranma? Perhaps any clue that may at least give me a location to begin searching?"
"Oh, no need to worry!" Soun said cheerfully, "They're right..." and small automobile came crashing through the wall, landing on the Tendou Patriarch."
"My, people should be careful where they park their vehicles," the woman stated with slight distaste.
"Hmm, what's up? Pops never hefts anything past his own bodyweight unless in immediate danger," Ranma-chan mused suspiciously.
"Oh dear, I suppose I will have to wait until Tendou-san recovers. I was so looking forward to finding out where Genma and Ranma were. He seems to know."
"Oh, you're searching for Uncle Saotome and Ranma-kun?" Kasumi asked cheerfully as she walked into the living room.
Nodoka turned to the lovely lady who opened the door and gave that... interesting... fact about her suitor, "So they have been here?"
"Oh yes, in fact they're..."
A panda on a unicycle blowing a loud trumpet juggling bowling pins rode through the living room with a sign around it's neck saying, "[LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME! Don't pay attention to her!!!]"
"Uh, what do you think you're doing Po..." A bowling pin colliding heavily enough to render unconsciousness to a cranium interrupted the redhead.
"[Whoops, clumsy me,]" The panda's sign said as it's head was bowed sheepishly.
"My, what an incredible panda," Nodoka stated with awe, "You have him trained so well!"
"Oh my, that's no a panda, that's..."
The Panda bowed after it's spectacular drum solo on the full drum set, "[let's hear it for Mr. PANDA!!!!]"
Kasumi and Nabiki held up lit lighters and waved them in the air.
"Mr. Panda," Nodoka repeated out loud.
"What the HELL you do that for, Panda-chan?" Onna-Ranma said in a growl.
"Oh my, you get the feeling Mr. Saotome's trying to hide something?" Kasumi leaned over and asked her sister Akane.
"That is such improper language for a young lady," the visiting woman reprimanded the redhead.
"Huh? But..."
"No buts, and your attire!"
"What? What's wrong with my clothes?" Ranma asked defensively
"You're dressed like such a tomboy! How do you expect to catch a boyfriend as you are?"
"Believe me, there isn't a problem with that one," Nabiki stated dryly.
Nodoka was scandalized, "You mean, you are of loose morals?"
Ranma blinked a couple of times.
"Young lady, what is your name?"
"Uh, Ran.."
::WHACK::
"Ranko Tendou?" The matronly woman read from the sign that collided with the back of the girl's head. The panda nodded furiously.
"Okay Panda-chan you're DEAD!" The redhead growled ferally at the now cowering panda. A firm hand grabbing onto her shirt collar arrested her leap.
"Now, now, it's not proper for a young lady to act so," Nodoka struck a dramatic pose, while cradling her ever present long bundle under her arms, "I shall teach you the proper ways of womanhood! This I vow!"
"Good, we can start with anatomy," Ranma-chan chirped.
Nodoka's glare turned disapproving, "yes, let's. I notice you're not wearing a bra."
"Well, I like the jiggling sensation," Ranma-chan replied, "And Akane and Nabiki don't seem to mind." Akane blushed while Nabiki openly stared.
"That's no excuse! Now why don't you go and put one on? You'll feel a lot more comfortable, I assure you."
"Uh, but I don't have any."
"Um, Ran...ko-sama, er, Ranko is our cousin from up north, she's a little, um, uncivil." Akane added stated cautiously. Genma didn't want this woman to know about Ranma or him, and until she found out the reason, she'd play along. Nabiki looked sideways at her sister, wondering why she was participating in this deception.
"Ranko, who the hell is Ranko?" Ranma-chan almost shouted.
"Language! Young lady!" Nodoka chided again, this was going to be a lot of work rehabilitating this lost soul in the arts of proper womanhood, "I think we'll first go shopping."
Ranma looked at the woman warily, while the panda had a panic attack.
"Oh dear, I think Mr. Panda is choking on something!" Akane moved towards the panda, acting like she was going to tend to it.
She started patting it on the back, and whispered to it, "Okay, *Panda-chan*, spill it."
"[Akane, you must NOT let Ranma reveal himself or find out that that's his mom, it's a matter of LIFE and DEATH!]"
Akane raised an eyebrow at the sign he was coyly only allowing her to see, "Aren't you being a little dramatic? You don't expect me to take this seriously, do you?"
"[As serious as a belly slitting!]"
"Huh?"
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"Okay, what's Panda-chan's excuse?" Ranma asked with a withering glance towards Akane.
The raven-haired girl looked towards the matronly woman in front of them, and spoke when she was sure she wasn't paying attention, "Forgive me, Ranma-sama, but it's for your own good."
"And since when have you been deciding what's good for me?" the redhead replied, raising an eyebrow. Akane looked down at her with a frightened nervousness, like she had just overstepped her bounds dramatically. Ranma-chan sighed, the girl's confidence was just finally starting to build back up too.
"Alright, if you want me to continue this charade, I'll do it for you, not the panda."
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It didn't take long at all to get into the charade.
"Oooh, this is nice! Can you hold this for me, Akane?" The girl in question mutely took the article of cloth (clothing would be too generous a description), while still covering her face with her other hand.
"What's wrong, Akane-chan? Is there anything you would like to try out?" Nodoka asked kindly.
"Uh, that's... okay," the raven haired girl replied from under her hand, "and, can you stop using my name in here, please?"
"Akane! This would just look great on you!" Ranma-chan said, holding up a golden yellow strip."
"I have to agree with Ranko-chan, you would look nice in that." Nodoka urged; she didn't want the other Tendou girl to feel left out.
"I'll... take your word for it, Ranko-sam... Ranko."
"Really, Akane," 'Ranko' chided, "We finally have someone old enough to make purchases for us in these stores, and you're just not being accommodating."
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At the next store...
"So, if you press this button, it makes the nipples vibrate?"
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And the one after that...
"Your usual 15% discount, Nodoka-chan?"
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Akane covered her head, as they sat in the food court for an early dinner, she just couldn't directly look the redhead in the face.
"Now, are you not feeling much better in that bra?" Nodoka asked 'Ranko'.
The girl in question quite happily nodded, and pulled on the straps of her bra, causing the pitch of the vibrations to change slightly, "You're right, they feel much better now! Thanks... uh..."
"You know? I just realized, I never told you my name!" Nodoka stated a bit shamefaced, "You can call me Sao..."
"YOU GOING TO EAT THAT?" Akane yelled, pointing to Nodoka's plate.
"Akane-chan, it's not nice for you to interrupt like that.
"I'm sorry, auntie." Akane apologized, again seeming to regress into herself.
Nodoka had a dazed look on her face, she liked 'Auntie'.
"Are you okay, Akane?" the redhead asked a bit concerned.
"Uh, yeah, I'm okay, I guess."
"Come to think of it, you have been looking rather flushed the whole trip," Nodoka replied with her own concern, "I think we've done enough shopping for today. We're not far from my home, why don't we go there to try on your new clothes and some tea; possibly something for Akane to help her calm down?"
"Huh? Calm down?"
"I guess," Ranma replied, looking down at the five bags of clothing she had with her.
"Um, I'm not sure that's such a good idea..." Akane stated nervously, "We should probably head back home before they start to wonder what happened to me and Ranm-Ranko."
"Nonsense, you can call them from my phone. I'm sure they won't mind if you were out a little longer."
"Well, we don't want to impose on you," Akane attempted to argue.
"Pish-posh, this has been a great day for this lonely old woman. At least allow the pleasure of spending more of my company with you two."
"I... I..." Akane couldn't say no to the woman, "I guess, for a little while."
"Good, let's gather your belongings, we have a few blocks to walk."
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Ranma walked around; there was a surreal familiarity with it all. Akane watched Ranma warily, in case something clicked.
"You have a nice place, Auntie."
"Thank you, though it's rather small, I'm afraid. When me and Gen..."
"*COUGH* *COUGH*, I think I may need that tea after all," Akane interrupted, sniffling a bit.
"Oh my, hold on a second, and I will bring you a cold remedy."
Akane's head slumped in relief, as Ranma continued to look around.
"This is weird..."
"What is, Ranm-Ranko?"
"I feel almost as if I've been here before..."
"*KAFF COUCH HACK*!!!"
Ranma was by Akane's side immediately, "You okay, Akane-chan?"
"Yeah, just... *kaff* ... some spit down the wrong pipe."
"I've returned, and the water for the tea should be about done," Nodoka stated, "Just take this with the tea, and you should be fine. It's a good thing we caught this early."
Akane graciously accepted a glass of water and the cold remedy. Ranma-chan eyed the three cups on the table warily, as their host went to retrieve the tea.
"Is there something wrong, Ranko-chan?" Nodoka asked at the redhead's curious expression.
"I'm... not up for tea, heh... heh..."
"Oh, please try some, it's one of my favorite blends!" She poured the tea in a cup, and handed it to the redhead, "Go on now, try it!"
Ranma gulped, and *very carefully brought the steaming cup to her mouth.
"It is good, isn't it?"
"Oh yes, nice," Ranma replied, being careful to set the tea down gently. Akane let out a breath she didn't even know she was holding.
"I'm glad you like it, there's a store around the corner that carries it. I haven't been able to find it anywhere else."
"That's interesting, Auntie."
"Now, I have to ask, what was it like for you growing up, Ranko?" Nodoka had set the perfect instance to start correcting the girl of her bad habits, but first she had to learn a bit about her background.
"Uhhhhh, well me and Pops had been training in the martial arts since I could start walking."
"My, that's impressive," Nodoka stated cheerfully, inside she was cringing, no wonder this girl was an absolute tomboy.
"Yeah, but recently I started picking up another art, one I wouldn't mind showing to you," Ranma stated with a smoky grin. Akane groaned.
"How nice, would you be willing to give me a demonstration?" Nodoka wasn't really focusing on the redhead, but considering how to break her out of unladylike habits; perhaps if she were more interested in this 'other art', it would be a more acceptable avenue than fighting.
"Oh, certainly!" Ranma replied, leaning forward onto the table, and not paying attention to where her elbow landed.
"OW! HOT!" A masculine voice screamed out.
"AUNTIE! WHO'S THAT?" Akane shouted quickly, while pointing to a random picture. She squeaked in horror when she realized who it was.
Nodoka quickly turned in shock at the girl's outburst to the picture, and got a wistful smile on her face, "Oh, that's of my dear son Ranma when he was but only three. He was such an energetic boy. I'm sure he became a fine young man." The woman turned back, and blinked at the sight of Akane staring back with a sickly grin on her face, with her glass held out at an angle as if it had had it's contents tossed out. The raven-haired girl seemed to be squirming at the intense scrutiny of the redhead. Said redhead hadn't caught what the woman had said, more angered at Akane for drenching her and the poor woman's floor.
"Oh, Akane-chan, that wasn't very nice."
"It, um, kind of slipped," Akane's sickly grin never wavered.
"Well, there's nothing that can be done about it, out of those wet cloths before you catch..."
Nodoka realized the girl was a natural redhead.
"...cold"
"You like what you see?" Ranma-chan asked in a sultry voice.
"You are a healthy young woman, but it won't help if you are standing nude. You may catch Akane-chan's cold."
Both girls face faulted.
"Come along to my room, I have a few things you can wear while these hang to dry. I'm afraid that you'll have to stay the night. I'll call your home and let them know."
"Swell, just swell," Akane mumbled to herself. Ranma-chan had the tell tale manic grin that told everyone that she was about to get some.
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Ranma walked into the room wearing rather racy sleeping lingerie that Nodoka had loaned her, and plopped onto the second futon their hostess had set out for them. She wasn't in the best of moods.
"Nice lady, but completely oblivious. Even Kasumi got the hint on the first try!"
"Don't worry about it and just go to sleep, Ranma-sama," Akane inwardly cheered, the less time the woman spent with Ranma, the less chance there was of something slipping.
"I wonder what her name is? I never got it."
"Just call her 'Auntie'."
"I guess, but it doesn't sound quite right to me." With that, Ranma lay down and attempted to drift to sleep.
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Ranma woke up in a dreamlike state, the early dinner left her feeling kind of hungry. In a peculiar familiarity, she navigated to the kitchen and grabbed something while barely awake. Even mostly asleep, she polished the piece of fruit off, and then staggered back down a familiar route to go back to bed. One that was familiar, but not the way to get back to the guest room.
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"I feel refreshed!" Akane stated, as she stretched for the morning. She looked towards Ranma's futon, finding the redhead missing, "Ranma?"
She got up and looked through the small place, not finding any trace of her, and finally decided to ask Nodoka what may have happened. She walked to the main bedroom, and found the door wide open. She walked in, and almost bumped into the dresser that was right next to the entrance. Akane turned to it, and her eyes went wide at it's contents; she would think people would keep *those* items in the bottom drawer, at least!
She quietly closed the drawer, and then turned to the bed, "Auntie, have..."
Auntie seemed to have the same sleeping habits Ranma had. Like for instance, the particular habit of kicking off *all* their clothes so they were nude. It was easily comparable, as Ranma was laying next to her in the same condition. What made it a bit disconcerting was the fact that they were almost in a light embrace, with their legs tangled together.
Akane reassessed what she thought of Nodoka's sleeping habits, as it might not have been accidental, seeing as one of the objects (a rather long one and double sided one at that) was laying behind her.
Nodoka awoke, and blinked at whom she had her hands gently holding onto...