Ranma the Amorous Over-Sexed Nympho
"Honored Elder," Ranma-chan said with a deep bow, "I humbly request your knowlege on a subject that has been plaguing us."
Cologne's mind screamed 'Deep deep shit' as she watched the redhead prostate herself before her, "My, aren't we laying it on thick..."
Ranma stood up and sweated a bit, "Well, heh... I'm kinda stumped on how to tackle a problem here."
"Well, there's no need to kowtow so brazenly, I'll assist with whatever the issue is while I'm here." Ranma perked up at that.
"Thanks! You see, there's this weird tree in the back. It grew in kinda fast, and we were wondering if you have any idea what it is."
Cologne officially updated the warning to 'Drowning in a septic tank', but allowed her curiousness to get a hold of her, "Oh? Show me this tree, then."
Ranma lead the matriarch into the back yard, and pointed to the unusually shapped tree that resembled a weeping willow that stood about twelve feet in height, "There it is, it's only been around for maybe a week or so, but it grows like you won't believe."
"Hmm, nothing out of the ordinary, it's just a mishappen Willow tree from it's appearance." Cologne went to take a closer look at the plant, managing to miss the conversation between Nabiki and Ranma.
"This is wrong, Saotome. This goes beyond anything in the past you have ever concieved. This is going to be your marking point for which you will be cast into the Hells pits of depravity."
"Uh-huh, but you're just as curious!" Ranma-chan replied with a smile. Nabiki just growled, and turned back to the elder woman, just as she started to scream. "Oh, oh yeah, I'm getting this!" the pigtailed girl commentated, while viewing the scene with one eye.
"Hmm, she's putting up quite a battle, how long do you think it'll take to wear her out?" Nabiki asked idly, allowing the gambling part of her to surface.
"Comoncomoncomon... damn, she got loose," Ranma exclaimed with a pout.
Cologne crawled away from the tree, with barely any descency intact, and then slowly pulled her self up off the ground with use of her cane, "Daughter-in... Ranma, I swear, by all that's sacred that if you don't give me that tape..." The old woman launched her staff towards the redhead, and suddenly all the girl saw was static in one eye."
"Do you realize how much that digital camera cost me?" Nabiki grumbled, though with the battle aura Cologne was putting out, she didn't want to make too big an issue of it. The old crone unceremoniously re-adjusted her nearly mangled robe, and took the destroyed camera away from Ranma.
With a vicious glare, the Amazon Matriarch rounded on the girl, "You.... I'm too angry to deal with you now..." With that, she stormed out of the Tendou property.
"Heh, good thing she didn't destroy the camera Kasumi had, you can come out Kasumi!" The young woman in question came out from around the side of the dojo, "Oh my, that was certainly exciting! But I think Wiggly-chan feels dejected." The tree almost seemed to nod in despair.
"Well, if Cologne-chan ain't gonna be a team player, we'll just have to cut her from the game. Hey, Akane-chan, up for videos tonight? I noticed you kinda had your back turned during the whole thing."
"Er... no thanks, Ranma-sama," Akane replied meekly, still not bothering to turn around, "I... have to be in the mood for that sort of thing." The raven-haired girl shuffled off soon after that
"Heh, well, your call, I guess."
"You're still gonna owe me for the Camera, Saotome."
"Ah, don't fret," the redhead placated, "We can easily make back ten times the cost selling copies on eBay. I mean, Elderly women being accousted by animated trees; It'll be the biggest seller since dirty underwear and decommissioned Russian Submirines!"
_______________________________
"Ranma-sama, as appealing as it is to keep around, we have to get rid of Wiggly-chan, for Kasumi's sake!"
"Oh, little sister, please don't go through the effort on my account," Kasumi replied sweetly.
The redhead lowered her cup of tea, and turned towards her short-haired potential fiancee, "I know, but it seems a damn shame, you know? I just don't think..." The pigtailed girl was cut off by a duo of high pitched shrills from the back yard.
"That sounded like..." Akane, Nabiki, Kasumi, and Ranma all ran to the back yard.
"Oh! It's nice to see you two again!" Kasumi greeted.
"RANMA SAOTOME!!!!" Screamed Leather, producing a microphone, and pointing at Ranma in the standard threatening wrestling manner, "NEXT FRIDAY! NERIMA FAMILY CENTER! THIS TIME, IT'S NOT ONLY FOR THE TITLE OF FEMALE WORLD OIL WRESTLING CHAMPIONSHIP TITLE... IT'S FOR REVENNNNNNNGGGGGEEEEEE!!!!!! PENANCE FOR TRAUMITIZING LACE, ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW!!!" After turning a baleful look to the puzzled redhead, Leather went to console her hysterically crying and traumitized partner, "There, there, Lace, they weren't *real* penises..."
"They-th-they we-were ev-v-verywha-where! The-they t-tou-touched me the-there..."
"Now, now, I'll kiss it better when we get back to our hotel while we both soak in our top-notch product." The muscular woman with the box haircut half-carried her distraught wrestling and domestic strawberry-blonde partner out of the Tendou's back gate.
"Poor Lace," Akane said with sympathy, "I wonder what they were here for?"
"I wonder what they were doing in the backyard?" Nabiki mused.
"Plothole the author was to lazy to rationalize," Kasumi answered gently. Everyone retired back to the house to consider their options.
_______________________________
The rugged looking Canadian glared at the tree, there was never a tree too tough or too tall for him, yet he was called out to defeat this scrawny thing?
"Hey, ya got yourself a runt here, eh?"
Nabiki shook her head, "Don't take that tree too lightly! It's stuffed tougher than you."
"Eh, I doubt that," The Canadian stated with a slight distain which was pleasently French.
"You've never been between Ranma-sama's thighs," Akane mumbled
"This ol' Canuk ain't seen a California Redwood that ain't been stumped by me. I'm bett'n one swing, que?" The lumberjack picked up his trusty ax, and approached the tree. All four girls flinched at the start of the screams.
"Wiggly-chan, Wiggly-chan, use the axe-handle first!" Kasumi lightly scolded.
"Uh... I think Wiggly-chan knows what it's doing," Nabiki said, turning slightly green.
"Don't.... even think about it," Kasumi, Akane, and Nabiki stated, as soon as Ranma-chan finished contemplating, and opened her mouth. The pigtailed girl closed her mouth with an audible snap.
"I think more drastic measures are required," stated Nabiki, "Ryoga, I'm going to need your assistance..."
_______________________________
"Orange Healthy Curiosity, SUIT UP!"
"Crimson Courage, SUIT UP!"
"Purple Unconscious Love, SUIT UP!"
"Yellow Freedom of Choice, SUIT UP!"
"Blue Desire, SUIT UP!"
The Orange, provocatively dressed man spun and raised his hand to point to the sky, "BY THE RADIANT RAINBOW THAT ENLIGHTENS US TO OUR CHOICES, AND ILLUNINATES THE WAY TO THE RAINBOW KINGDOM," he pointed directly at Wiggly-chan in a commanding manner, "WE SHALL PUNISH YOU!!!!!" All five struck awe-inspiring poses, with Orange in the center.
"Quite awe inspiring..." drolled Nabiki.
"Purple can kick awfully high," Akane mused.
"I believe that's part of #42 of the advanced Kama Sutra that Yellow is posing in," critiqued Ranma-chan.
"I never get tired of this part!" Ryouga exclaimed with an almost giddy tone.
"Er.. riiiiight," Nabiki replied, glancing sideways at the usually Lost Boy.
"And how's Ukyo doing these days?" Ryoga asked casually, not turning to look in Nabiki's direction, lest she saw his smugly surperior look.
"She's fine," Nabiki replied, tersely, and then turned towards the source of masculine screams of violation.
_______________________________
"Thank you, Kasumi." Replied the Yellow one, who seemed to not be affected at all by the ordeal he and his comrades went through.
"Thanks Kasumi," Replied the Purple dressed man who was walking funny, but trying to act casual.
"Um, thanks," replied the Blue man, who was trying to hide his grimace.
"..." the orange one stated, taking the jar of ointment and nodding meekly to the young woman, before rushing off to find the previous man dressed in blue.
The man dress in Crimson stomped up to Kasumi, and snatched the prooffered jar of anal ointment rather rudely. Kasumi understood his temper, and felt she should apologise, "I'm terribly sorry Wiggly-chan was so rough; it's just that he thought you would enjoy it."
"AND WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY?!?" The man got in Kasumi's face and started yelling, forcing the rather serene girl to pull her head back in startlement.
"Oh my."
The Yellow Senshi came up, and firmly dragged his teammate off by a shoulder, while Purple came up behind them, "Sorry about that, he's been a bit on edge, every since his friend Yuko has been demanding more time with him that he's having problems committing to."
"Oh, I guess I understand, me and dear Dr. Tofu are having issues ourselves."
_______________________________
"Well, I'm fresh out of ideas," exclaimed Ranma-chan cheerfully, before getting up from the table and beginning to head for the back yard. Nabiki reached out and grabbed the back of her shirt before she got anywhere.
"Not so fast, we're gonna get rid of that damn thing, if you like it or not."
"Face it, it's got us beat pretty badly," the redhead replied with false broken spirit. Nabiki raised an eyebrow, and tossed a kettle of hot water at the girl.
"OW! HOT!"
"Welcome back, you free-loading bastard," Nabiki greeted with a cheerful tone.
"Ha... ha..." Otoko-Ranma replied, wiping his face off.
"Nabiki, why did we need Ranma as a male?" Akane asked, curiously.
"What? You prefer me more as a gi.... what happened to 'Ranma-sama'?" Akane merely waived the question off.
"Because, it will allow us to use our most powerful weapon," Nabiki said with a nasty grin.
"Huh? I don't understand!"
"Honestly, Akane, it's so obvious, it was right under our nose."
"It was?" Ranma asked, before the light dawned on him, "Oh yeah!"
"I'm still in the dark," Akane stated with a confused expression.
"That's what Ranma's here for!" The pigtailed boy puffed out his chest at Nabiki's appraisal, "He's bait."
"Wha? NO! NO WAY!!!! UH-UH!!!! NEIN! NYET! NO`!"
"Can I turn him back into a girl now?" Akane asked, scrunching up her cute little nose.
"HEY!"
"Really, Ranma, you won't even have to do anything." Nabiki looked around a bit, "Where'd you last see Ryoga?"
Akane's eyes lit up in realization, "Of course! Ryoga would go through Hell for Ranma, and come out on top!"
Nabiki smirked, "Exactly."
"Um, now I'm the one that's lost, here," Ranma stated.
"Well, Saotome, what do you mean to Ryoga?" Ranma's face scrunched up in thought, causing both Nabiki and Akane to face fault. Nabiki managed to peel her face off the table with a sour expression, "Don't blow a valve up there..."
"Hey!" Ranma's face became one of almost horrid realization, "Ryoga is..."
"Very good, Saotome. You will begin to use that miniscule mental capacity granted to you by Kami-sama, yet!"
"MY RIVAL!" Ranma exclaimed.
"You're paying for my plastic surgery," Nabiki stated crossly, pulling her face off the table for a second time.
"Can't I just change him back to a girl?" Akane pleaded.
"I have feelings too, you know?" Ranma almost growled.
Akane blinked, and then cowed down, "Sorry, Ranma."
"Anyway, with us being rivals, he'll do anything for me, just so that we would have our final match together!" Ranma beamed with the notion.
"Er... something like that," Nabiki decided that the details weren't important, "Hopefully, he hasn't gotten lost too far... RYOGA!!! THE TREE HAS RANMA!!!!!"
"HOW DARE YOU TOUCH HIM! PREPARE TO DIE, WIGGLY-CHAN!!!!" Ryoga shouted, rushing out of the hall closet, and straight for the backyard.
"He's pretty focused when given a goal," Nabiki mused.
"Yeah, he was pretty pumped, I guess our rivalry really means something to him, huh?"
"Uh, whatever," Nabiki commented, right before the screams began.
"You know? Those screams are becoming rather tedious," Akane noted, covering her ears when the tones reached alto.
"That's for the 'Ukyo' crack," Nabiki mumbled, and then took a drink from her lemonade.
"Oh, Nabiki, that wasn't very nice," Kasumi admonished, bringing in another pitcher of refreshment.
"Well, you're in luck, Saotome, Ryoga's definitely a screamer," Nabiki mused with a sardonic grin.
"I always thought him more a grunter, myself" Ranma commented, "I mean, he can definitely take it rough when we get down and dirty."
"Oh my, that is a painful sensation," stated Kasumi, pulling her face from the table, along with her sisters. Akane decided to splash Ranma before he said anything else that would give everyone a mild cuncussion.
_______________________________
"Well, I say we give up now," Ranma-chan offered, "I mean, there's nothing else we can do to the thing, except enjoy it."
"I agree with Ranma-chan," Kasumi seconded, "you all tried your best."
"Well, I guess the good doctor will just have to love you the way you are... if he can..." Nabimi replied, finally giving in to defeat.
Akane put her chin in her hands, "I still wish there was something we can do for..."
"AKANE TENDOU! I HAVE COME TO RESCUE YOU FROM THE DEPRAVITY OF RANMA SAOTOME AND HIS FOUL SUCCUBUS!!!!"
"No, I doubt he could do anything," Ranma-chan commented before anyone else.
"Well, how about we throw him out on a limb, anyway?" Nabiki offered; if the tree was good for anything, it was entertainment value. The middle Tendou sister turned towards the front door, "KUNO! SAOTOME AND THE PIGTAILED GIRL SUMMONED THE EVIL TREE THAT'S TERRORIZING AKANE IN THE BACK YARD!!!!"
"LO? AKANE TENDOU IN DIRE STRAITS? I, TATEWAKE KUNO, SHALL NOT LET THIS STAND!" A blue streak shot through the house, and into the back yard.
"Well, how about we go watch?" Nabiki lead the way into the back yard, when they realized something miraculous happened, something none of them had realized possible.
Kuno held out for a good five seconds , before he started to scream.
"Wow, I have a new respect for Kuno," Akane said with awe, "Wiggly-chan's really trying to work him over."
"I think the delay was because Kuno had taken a while to realize he was being plugged."
"Hmm, makes sense," Ranma-chan replied, as they all gathered around the bucket of popcorn, and enjoyed the show.
_______________________________
"Ranma-sama, are you sure this is wise?" Akane asked, once again. The redhead made sure her nipple clamps were in place, and got into stance as best she could with the spreader bard attached at her knees.
"Akane, Kuno proved it may be possible, so all I have to do is just out-last Wiggly-chan, and it will be as good as defeated."
Akane scrunched her face up in determination, "Well, if you're going, then *I'm* going, too!"
"No, Akane, it's gonna be too dangerous! Where I'm going, it will be relentless," Ranma-chan replied, while eyeing the tree with a hardened focus born of a true fighter.
"I don't care! I'm not gonna let you fight this battle alone!"
The pigtailed girl almost staggered at the girl's proclimation, "You... you're really willing to go through this?"
"Of course!" Akane stated with resolve, "Besides, two bodies of stamina against one, we have a better chance!"
Ranma looked hard at the raven haired girl, and came to a decision, "Okay, we'll do this... together then." Akane smiled, and took the redheads hand, "You ready for this?"
"With you, I'm always ready, Ranma-sama." Ranma nodded, and they both started towards the tree; Akane running, Ranma hobbling best she could. Once they both reached the tree, they braced themselves, and closed their eyes.
And the kept bracing.
Akane opened one of her eyes.
Ranma followed suit.
Finally, both of them were standing there, feeling oddly exasperated, as Wiggly-chan just swayed in the slight wind.
"What's up with this stupid tree, now?" Ranma growled, "Aren't we pretty enough?"
"Ranma-sama... what do you think these flower buds mean?" Akane asked, pointing to a small bud growing on one of the branches...
_______________________________
"So," Ranma-chan started, while facing Cologne, "you're telling me, that that hairpin was actually some kind of seed?"
Cologne sipped the tea she was supplied, "Yes, it was one of our greatest treasures. Used for when a woman became too frigid with her husband, or when the husband lacked incentive."
"Oh my, everyone on the block has bought their very own Wiggly-chan," Kasumi stated, while watering her own potted preverse tree.
"I think I'll start a hair care product from the seeds," Nabiki planned, while counting the money she racked in from small tree sales, "They already come conveniently shaped as hair pins!"
"How's Dr. Tofu taking this?" Akane asked, looking towards her oldest sister.
"Oh, he's coming along well," Kasumi replied, and then giggled at her pun, "With a Wiggly-chan in the bedroom, he'll catch up to me in no time in stamina."
"I hope you're not working him *too* hard, sis," Nabiki commented, while still not bothering to look up from her pile of money.
"Oh?" Kasumi started to reply, "Why? Could it be a problem?"
_______________________________
The Tendous, the Saotomes, Cologne, Shampoo, and Kodachi all returned from the service, looking grim.
"Geez, what a way to go," Otoko-Ranma replied, "He was so healthy, too."
The Wiggly-chan that stood six feet tall in a wheelbarrow being hauled by Kasumi began to whimper and shake.
"There, there," Kasumi placated, "It's not your fault, don't blame yourself."
"Nerima's sure not gonna be the same without him," the pigtailed boy ventured.
"Honored Elder," Ranma-chan said with a deep bow, "I humbly request your knowlege on a subject that has been plaguing us."
Cologne's mind screamed 'Deep deep shit' as she watched the redhead prostate herself before her, "My, aren't we laying it on thick..."
Ranma stood up and sweated a bit, "Well, heh... I'm kinda stumped on how to tackle a problem here."
"Well, there's no need to kowtow so brazenly, I'll assist with whatever the issue is while I'm here." Ranma perked up at that.
"Thanks! You see, there's this weird tree in the back. It grew in kinda fast, and we were wondering if you have any idea what it is."
Cologne officially updated the warning to 'Drowning in a septic tank', but allowed her curiousness to get a hold of her, "Oh? Show me this tree, then."
Ranma lead the matriarch into the back yard, and pointed to the unusually shapped tree that resembled a weeping willow that stood about twelve feet in height, "There it is, it's only been around for maybe a week or so, but it grows like you won't believe."
"Hmm, nothing out of the ordinary, it's just a mishappen Willow tree from it's appearance." Cologne went to take a closer look at the plant, managing to miss the conversation between Nabiki and Ranma.
"This is wrong, Saotome. This goes beyond anything in the past you have ever concieved. This is going to be your marking point for which you will be cast into the Hells pits of depravity."
"Uh-huh, but you're just as curious!" Ranma-chan replied with a smile. Nabiki just growled, and turned back to the elder woman, just as she started to scream. "Oh, oh yeah, I'm getting this!" the pigtailed girl commentated, while viewing the scene with one eye.
"Hmm, she's putting up quite a battle, how long do you think it'll take to wear her out?" Nabiki asked idly, allowing the gambling part of her to surface.
"Comoncomoncomon... damn, she got loose," Ranma exclaimed with a pout.
Cologne crawled away from the tree, with barely any descency intact, and then slowly pulled her self up off the ground with use of her cane, "Daughter-in... Ranma, I swear, by all that's sacred that if you don't give me that tape..." The old woman launched her staff towards the redhead, and suddenly all the girl saw was static in one eye."
"Do you realize how much that digital camera cost me?" Nabiki grumbled, though with the battle aura Cologne was putting out, she didn't want to make too big an issue of it. The old crone unceremoniously re-adjusted her nearly mangled robe, and took the destroyed camera away from Ranma.
With a vicious glare, the Amazon Matriarch rounded on the girl, "You.... I'm too angry to deal with you now..." With that, she stormed out of the Tendou property.
"Heh, good thing she didn't destroy the camera Kasumi had, you can come out Kasumi!" The young woman in question came out from around the side of the dojo, "Oh my, that was certainly exciting! But I think Wiggly-chan feels dejected." The tree almost seemed to nod in despair.
"Well, if Cologne-chan ain't gonna be a team player, we'll just have to cut her from the game. Hey, Akane-chan, up for videos tonight? I noticed you kinda had your back turned during the whole thing."
"Er... no thanks, Ranma-sama," Akane replied meekly, still not bothering to turn around, "I... have to be in the mood for that sort of thing." The raven-haired girl shuffled off soon after that
"Heh, well, your call, I guess."
"You're still gonna owe me for the Camera, Saotome."
"Ah, don't fret," the redhead placated, "We can easily make back ten times the cost selling copies on eBay. I mean, Elderly women being accousted by animated trees; It'll be the biggest seller since dirty underwear and decommissioned Russian Submirines!"
_______________________________
"Ranma-sama, as appealing as it is to keep around, we have to get rid of Wiggly-chan, for Kasumi's sake!"
"Oh, little sister, please don't go through the effort on my account," Kasumi replied sweetly.
The redhead lowered her cup of tea, and turned towards her short-haired potential fiancee, "I know, but it seems a damn shame, you know? I just don't think..." The pigtailed girl was cut off by a duo of high pitched shrills from the back yard.
"That sounded like..." Akane, Nabiki, Kasumi, and Ranma all ran to the back yard.
"Oh! It's nice to see you two again!" Kasumi greeted.
"RANMA SAOTOME!!!!" Screamed Leather, producing a microphone, and pointing at Ranma in the standard threatening wrestling manner, "NEXT FRIDAY! NERIMA FAMILY CENTER! THIS TIME, IT'S NOT ONLY FOR THE TITLE OF FEMALE WORLD OIL WRESTLING CHAMPIONSHIP TITLE... IT'S FOR REVENNNNNNNGGGGGEEEEEE!!!!!! PENANCE FOR TRAUMITIZING LACE, ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW!!!" After turning a baleful look to the puzzled redhead, Leather went to console her hysterically crying and traumitized partner, "There, there, Lace, they weren't *real* penises..."
"They-th-they we-were ev-v-verywha-where! The-they t-tou-touched me the-there..."
"Now, now, I'll kiss it better when we get back to our hotel while we both soak in our top-notch product." The muscular woman with the box haircut half-carried her distraught wrestling and domestic strawberry-blonde partner out of the Tendou's back gate.
"Poor Lace," Akane said with sympathy, "I wonder what they were here for?"
"I wonder what they were doing in the backyard?" Nabiki mused.
"Plothole the author was to lazy to rationalize," Kasumi answered gently. Everyone retired back to the house to consider their options.
_______________________________
The rugged looking Canadian glared at the tree, there was never a tree too tough or too tall for him, yet he was called out to defeat this scrawny thing?
"Hey, ya got yourself a runt here, eh?"
Nabiki shook her head, "Don't take that tree too lightly! It's stuffed tougher than you."
"Eh, I doubt that," The Canadian stated with a slight distain which was pleasently French.
"You've never been between Ranma-sama's thighs," Akane mumbled
"This ol' Canuk ain't seen a California Redwood that ain't been stumped by me. I'm bett'n one swing, que?" The lumberjack picked up his trusty ax, and approached the tree. All four girls flinched at the start of the screams.
"Wiggly-chan, Wiggly-chan, use the axe-handle first!" Kasumi lightly scolded.
"Uh... I think Wiggly-chan knows what it's doing," Nabiki said, turning slightly green.
"Don't.... even think about it," Kasumi, Akane, and Nabiki stated, as soon as Ranma-chan finished contemplating, and opened her mouth. The pigtailed girl closed her mouth with an audible snap.
"I think more drastic measures are required," stated Nabiki, "Ryoga, I'm going to need your assistance..."
_______________________________
"Orange Healthy Curiosity, SUIT UP!"
"Crimson Courage, SUIT UP!"
"Purple Unconscious Love, SUIT UP!"
"Yellow Freedom of Choice, SUIT UP!"
"Blue Desire, SUIT UP!"
The Orange, provocatively dressed man spun and raised his hand to point to the sky, "BY THE RADIANT RAINBOW THAT ENLIGHTENS US TO OUR CHOICES, AND ILLUNINATES THE WAY TO THE RAINBOW KINGDOM," he pointed directly at Wiggly-chan in a commanding manner, "WE SHALL PUNISH YOU!!!!!" All five struck awe-inspiring poses, with Orange in the center.
"Quite awe inspiring..." drolled Nabiki.
"Purple can kick awfully high," Akane mused.
"I believe that's part of #42 of the advanced Kama Sutra that Yellow is posing in," critiqued Ranma-chan.
"I never get tired of this part!" Ryouga exclaimed with an almost giddy tone.
"Er.. riiiiight," Nabiki replied, glancing sideways at the usually Lost Boy.
"And how's Ukyo doing these days?" Ryoga asked casually, not turning to look in Nabiki's direction, lest she saw his smugly surperior look.
"She's fine," Nabiki replied, tersely, and then turned towards the source of masculine screams of violation.
_______________________________
"Thank you, Kasumi." Replied the Yellow one, who seemed to not be affected at all by the ordeal he and his comrades went through.
"Thanks Kasumi," Replied the Purple dressed man who was walking funny, but trying to act casual.
"Um, thanks," replied the Blue man, who was trying to hide his grimace.
"..." the orange one stated, taking the jar of ointment and nodding meekly to the young woman, before rushing off to find the previous man dressed in blue.
The man dress in Crimson stomped up to Kasumi, and snatched the prooffered jar of anal ointment rather rudely. Kasumi understood his temper, and felt she should apologise, "I'm terribly sorry Wiggly-chan was so rough; it's just that he thought you would enjoy it."
"AND WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY?!?" The man got in Kasumi's face and started yelling, forcing the rather serene girl to pull her head back in startlement.
"Oh my."
The Yellow Senshi came up, and firmly dragged his teammate off by a shoulder, while Purple came up behind them, "Sorry about that, he's been a bit on edge, every since his friend Yuko has been demanding more time with him that he's having problems committing to."
"Oh, I guess I understand, me and dear Dr. Tofu are having issues ourselves."
_______________________________
"Well, I'm fresh out of ideas," exclaimed Ranma-chan cheerfully, before getting up from the table and beginning to head for the back yard. Nabiki reached out and grabbed the back of her shirt before she got anywhere.
"Not so fast, we're gonna get rid of that damn thing, if you like it or not."
"Face it, it's got us beat pretty badly," the redhead replied with false broken spirit. Nabiki raised an eyebrow, and tossed a kettle of hot water at the girl.
"OW! HOT!"
"Welcome back, you free-loading bastard," Nabiki greeted with a cheerful tone.
"Ha... ha..." Otoko-Ranma replied, wiping his face off.
"Nabiki, why did we need Ranma as a male?" Akane asked, curiously.
"What? You prefer me more as a gi.... what happened to 'Ranma-sama'?" Akane merely waived the question off.
"Because, it will allow us to use our most powerful weapon," Nabiki said with a nasty grin.
"Huh? I don't understand!"
"Honestly, Akane, it's so obvious, it was right under our nose."
"It was?" Ranma asked, before the light dawned on him, "Oh yeah!"
"I'm still in the dark," Akane stated with a confused expression.
"That's what Ranma's here for!" The pigtailed boy puffed out his chest at Nabiki's appraisal, "He's bait."
"Wha? NO! NO WAY!!!! UH-UH!!!! NEIN! NYET! NO`!"
"Can I turn him back into a girl now?" Akane asked, scrunching up her cute little nose.
"HEY!"
"Really, Ranma, you won't even have to do anything." Nabiki looked around a bit, "Where'd you last see Ryoga?"
Akane's eyes lit up in realization, "Of course! Ryoga would go through Hell for Ranma, and come out on top!"
Nabiki smirked, "Exactly."
"Um, now I'm the one that's lost, here," Ranma stated.
"Well, Saotome, what do you mean to Ryoga?" Ranma's face scrunched up in thought, causing both Nabiki and Akane to face fault. Nabiki managed to peel her face off the table with a sour expression, "Don't blow a valve up there..."
"Hey!" Ranma's face became one of almost horrid realization, "Ryoga is..."
"Very good, Saotome. You will begin to use that miniscule mental capacity granted to you by Kami-sama, yet!"
"MY RIVAL!" Ranma exclaimed.
"You're paying for my plastic surgery," Nabiki stated crossly, pulling her face off the table for a second time.
"Can't I just change him back to a girl?" Akane pleaded.
"I have feelings too, you know?" Ranma almost growled.
Akane blinked, and then cowed down, "Sorry, Ranma."
"Anyway, with us being rivals, he'll do anything for me, just so that we would have our final match together!" Ranma beamed with the notion.
"Er... something like that," Nabiki decided that the details weren't important, "Hopefully, he hasn't gotten lost too far... RYOGA!!! THE TREE HAS RANMA!!!!!"
"HOW DARE YOU TOUCH HIM! PREPARE TO DIE, WIGGLY-CHAN!!!!" Ryoga shouted, rushing out of the hall closet, and straight for the backyard.
"He's pretty focused when given a goal," Nabiki mused.
"Yeah, he was pretty pumped, I guess our rivalry really means something to him, huh?"
"Uh, whatever," Nabiki commented, right before the screams began.
"You know? Those screams are becoming rather tedious," Akane noted, covering her ears when the tones reached alto.
"That's for the 'Ukyo' crack," Nabiki mumbled, and then took a drink from her lemonade.
"Oh, Nabiki, that wasn't very nice," Kasumi admonished, bringing in another pitcher of refreshment.
"Well, you're in luck, Saotome, Ryoga's definitely a screamer," Nabiki mused with a sardonic grin.
"I always thought him more a grunter, myself" Ranma commented, "I mean, he can definitely take it rough when we get down and dirty."
"Oh my, that is a painful sensation," stated Kasumi, pulling her face from the table, along with her sisters. Akane decided to splash Ranma before he said anything else that would give everyone a mild cuncussion.
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"Well, I say we give up now," Ranma-chan offered, "I mean, there's nothing else we can do to the thing, except enjoy it."
"I agree with Ranma-chan," Kasumi seconded, "you all tried your best."
"Well, I guess the good doctor will just have to love you the way you are... if he can..." Nabimi replied, finally giving in to defeat.
Akane put her chin in her hands, "I still wish there was something we can do for..."
"AKANE TENDOU! I HAVE COME TO RESCUE YOU FROM THE DEPRAVITY OF RANMA SAOTOME AND HIS FOUL SUCCUBUS!!!!"
"No, I doubt he could do anything," Ranma-chan commented before anyone else.
"Well, how about we throw him out on a limb, anyway?" Nabiki offered; if the tree was good for anything, it was entertainment value. The middle Tendou sister turned towards the front door, "KUNO! SAOTOME AND THE PIGTAILED GIRL SUMMONED THE EVIL TREE THAT'S TERRORIZING AKANE IN THE BACK YARD!!!!"
"LO? AKANE TENDOU IN DIRE STRAITS? I, TATEWAKE KUNO, SHALL NOT LET THIS STAND!" A blue streak shot through the house, and into the back yard.
"Well, how about we go watch?" Nabiki lead the way into the back yard, when they realized something miraculous happened, something none of them had realized possible.
Kuno held out for a good five seconds , before he started to scream.
"Wow, I have a new respect for Kuno," Akane said with awe, "Wiggly-chan's really trying to work him over."
"I think the delay was because Kuno had taken a while to realize he was being plugged."
"Hmm, makes sense," Ranma-chan replied, as they all gathered around the bucket of popcorn, and enjoyed the show.
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"Ranma-sama, are you sure this is wise?" Akane asked, once again. The redhead made sure her nipple clamps were in place, and got into stance as best she could with the spreader bard attached at her knees.
"Akane, Kuno proved it may be possible, so all I have to do is just out-last Wiggly-chan, and it will be as good as defeated."
Akane scrunched her face up in determination, "Well, if you're going, then *I'm* going, too!"
"No, Akane, it's gonna be too dangerous! Where I'm going, it will be relentless," Ranma-chan replied, while eyeing the tree with a hardened focus born of a true fighter.
"I don't care! I'm not gonna let you fight this battle alone!"
The pigtailed girl almost staggered at the girl's proclimation, "You... you're really willing to go through this?"
"Of course!" Akane stated with resolve, "Besides, two bodies of stamina against one, we have a better chance!"
Ranma looked hard at the raven haired girl, and came to a decision, "Okay, we'll do this... together then." Akane smiled, and took the redheads hand, "You ready for this?"
"With you, I'm always ready, Ranma-sama." Ranma nodded, and they both started towards the tree; Akane running, Ranma hobbling best she could. Once they both reached the tree, they braced themselves, and closed their eyes.
And the kept bracing.
Akane opened one of her eyes.
Ranma followed suit.
Finally, both of them were standing there, feeling oddly exasperated, as Wiggly-chan just swayed in the slight wind.
"What's up with this stupid tree, now?" Ranma growled, "Aren't we pretty enough?"
"Ranma-sama... what do you think these flower buds mean?" Akane asked, pointing to a small bud growing on one of the branches...
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"So," Ranma-chan started, while facing Cologne, "you're telling me, that that hairpin was actually some kind of seed?"
Cologne sipped the tea she was supplied, "Yes, it was one of our greatest treasures. Used for when a woman became too frigid with her husband, or when the husband lacked incentive."
"Oh my, everyone on the block has bought their very own Wiggly-chan," Kasumi stated, while watering her own potted preverse tree.
"I think I'll start a hair care product from the seeds," Nabiki planned, while counting the money she racked in from small tree sales, "They already come conveniently shaped as hair pins!"
"How's Dr. Tofu taking this?" Akane asked, looking towards her oldest sister.
"Oh, he's coming along well," Kasumi replied, and then giggled at her pun, "With a Wiggly-chan in the bedroom, he'll catch up to me in no time in stamina."
"I hope you're not working him *too* hard, sis," Nabiki commented, while still not bothering to look up from her pile of money.
"Oh?" Kasumi started to reply, "Why? Could it be a problem?"
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The Tendous, the Saotomes, Cologne, Shampoo, and Kodachi all returned from the service, looking grim.
"Geez, what a way to go," Otoko-Ranma replied, "He was so healthy, too."
The Wiggly-chan that stood six feet tall in a wheelbarrow being hauled by Kasumi began to whimper and shake.
"There, there," Kasumi placated, "It's not your fault, don't blame yourself."
"Nerima's sure not gonna be the same without him," the pigtailed boy ventured.