AN: Thank you so much for all the wonderful reviews. It really helps me to know what you are thinking about each chapter, so please let me know how you react to this one. It's Saturday night, they've spent the day in San Francisco and are now going back to Manka's.
Chapter 30: Blue Moon: All the Things You Are
The fog had lifted a bit by the time we got to the Golden Gate Bridge and it was thrilling to cross it and look back at the jewel that was the city of San Francisco. Edward had done everything possible to make this the perfect day for me, and he had been successful. Even with my narrow escapes it was still a fantastic day. He was holding my left hand in his right as he drove, and he had just pushed 'Play' to start one of his classical music CDs on the car stereo.
He deftly passed a dark blue BMW and I had a sudden thought.
"You know I don't pay a lot of attention to cars, but it seems like almost every car we've passed has been a BMW."
"Down here BMW stands for basic Marin wheels," Edward said, grinning at me.
"How do you know so much about Marin? Have you ever lived here?"
"No, we have never owed a house here, but I have visited. Anytime there's a mountain lion problem I'm down here in a flash. Jasper monitors wildlife activity on the internet, so we know when our services, shall we say, are needed."
"So when you're gone for two or three days, sometimes you're here?"
"Yes, sometimes."
"I had no idea. Have you used that jet taxi service we used before?"
"Yes, many times," he said matter of factly.
"That explains how this car was waiting for us at the airport," I mused aloud.
"Well it's easier than looking for a Porsche to hotwire."
I glared at him and shivered, as I usually did when I thought of that time in Italy. He paid no attention and kept talking.
"We usually have a car waiting for us. We've had many years to perfect a system."
I was beginning to realize how many things went on, with Edward, and different family members that I had no clue about. I was starting to wonder what else went on that necessitated me being kept in the dark.
As we drove north along Highway 1, hugging the curves of the coastline, I watched the dim moonlight shine on the ocean and then I looked down at my wrist. The moonlight reflected on the crescent shaped scar and I began to worry that I would never be good enough for Edward.
I quickly stole a glance at his handsome profile. I didn't want him to see me staring at him, although I could happily have spent eternity just looking at his beautiful face, until my all too human eyelids drooped and closed of their own volition. Maybe I would just take a few moments to rest and reflect on the mythical creature beside me.
Even with my eyes closed I could easily see Edward's handsome face. He looked so aristocratic; like royalty. It was easy to imagine he was a prince and I was a pauper. Well, maybe not a pauper, although I would never be able to match him in wealth, or looks.
Maybe it was more like the Prince and the peasant. I felt like I could never attain his level of perfection, no matter how many years I could spend with him. I hoped it would be for all of eternity, but I still had no way of knowing.
Until after the wedding everything was still up in the air, and with my luck… no, I just couldn't think about losing him. Not when things were going so well and we were so close to getting everything we wanted, because as amazing as it seemed, Edward wanted me. He had made that much very clear at dinner a little while ago. He wanted me in every way. He was desperate to get that wedding ring on my finger, and he had even agreed to change me so I could be with him forever. I couldn't relax until that actually happened, but the mere prospect of it made me hum with anticipation.
We had hurt each other, but that was in the past. I would not hurt him again and he promised he would never leave me. In fact, he promised to make all my dreams come true. Why still eluded me. What did he see in me? Yes, my blood smelled good, but there had to be more than that.
The fact that I could also smell blood and it so repulsed me did make me different. Just the thought of it made me lightheaded. I must direct my mind to more pleasant thoughts. Edward. The thought of him also made me lightheaded but in a much more delightful way and made my body have other physical reactions, more to my liking.
He said I made him feel human, alive. Was that because I was human? If so, would he still want me when I was a vampire? He would never talk about what our life would be like then; what I would be like then, other than the bad parts, the newborn strength and wildness. Would he be completely repulsed when he saw me like that? He said I would be a constant visual reminder of how much I loved him, but what if he no longer loved the new me? What if he just stayed with me out of guilt?
Edward was unique; he was so far superior to mere humans, and even others of his kind. What made him so special? He had to have some sort of mind reading ability when he was human, for it to be so magnified now. What was that like for him? Did it just make him a good judge of character or a complete cynic? He was kind and gentle with me but arrogant and aloof with most other people. He could be very charming when he wanted to be, and very cold when he didn't. He was always so careful with me, in every way. Would he always be like that?
I couldn't believe this was my life. I was in love with the most beautiful person in the world, and unbelievably he was in love with me. Plain, clumsy, all too mortal, human girl, me, a magnet for trouble. Would that particular trait follow me into my new, married vampire existence?
Yet Edward loved me. Why couldn't he have been born 18 years ago, instead of being reborn in 1918? Why couldn't I wake up and discover all the mythical creature stuff was just my imagination? If only he were human. He wouldn't be torturing himself over my coming change. We both knew it had to happen. I wanted it to happen. He had to want it to happen, if he wanted me to be with him forever. There was no other way.
I was beginning to have thoughts about my last supper, or whatever meal it was going to be. Frankly, after the recent experience with Victoria, I had thought that it was quite possible I might be turned into a vampire with no warning and of course that would be preferable to death. Now sometimes when I had a meal, I wondered if it was going to be my last… my last meal as a human. I didn't really care.
Meanwhile Edward was trying so hard to provide me with all these new taste sensations. I knew he was doing all this for my benefit, but I supposed it didn't occur to him that perhaps I would become so wild about the hot cheese puffs that I might not want to stop being human. Or maybe that was what was behind all this. Maybe this was all part of a cunning plan on his part. Ply me with exotic delicacies and tempt me with new experiences so I would want to stay human. No, he couldn't be doing that. He had agreed to change me, even if he didn't seem happy about it.
At the same time, I had to admit I was afraid, mostly because I had so many questions, and he seemed determined to keep me from finding out the whole truth. I knew he was probably just trying to make things easier for me by not overwhelming me with information, but it seemed to be having the opposite effect.
What little I knew I had gleaned from conversations with Alice and Carlisle; Edward was always so cautious with me. He would never let me see him hunt; I understood it was too dangerous, but just what did that mean, and when would I find out? When it was too late to effect my decision?
There were so many unknowns. What if I got out of control and attacked a person? Newborns are supposed to be unnaturally strong; what if I lashed out at someone in the family and hurt them? What if I accidentally crossed the boundary line in La Push and came in contact with Jake's pack? I knew he wouldn't hurt me, but I couldn't be sure about the rest of the pack. Their instincts would probably take over, as would mine.
Why was I having all these thoughts now? Was I feeling Edward's anxiety? He had become fairly serious at dinner, still feeling guilty about abandoning me for my own good. At least he had admitted that making a unilateral decision without even consulting me had been arrogant; that gave me hope that he would never do anything like that again. Dredging up those memories left me exhausted, though; and that fortune in the cookie… I didn't need a reminder that I should never let him go, but did he want me around forever?
Suddenly I felt a wave of fear. I was so afraid; afraid of disappointing him, afraid of marriage, afraid Edward wouldn't change me; afraid he would. Afraid I would never be able to drink blood, any kind of blood, and I would starve to death…the first anorexic vampire. Technically I wouldn't be considered 'living' anymore. In order to be with Edward forever I had to be among the undead.
It didn't make any sense, but it was the only way. It was mind-boggling. My head started to spin. Maybe it was the curves in the road or the speed with which Edward was taking them. I took a deep breath and tried to concentrate on listening to the soothing music.
Edward's POV
The classical music was helping to calm my nerves as I negotiated the winding coastal road back to Manka's. My sleeping beauty had fallen into a dreamless slumber as soon as we crossed the Golden Gate Bridge and turned onto Highway One. I could tell she was bothered by something though, as her delicate scent held a deeper, troubling note. As my eyes passed over her slender shoulders and the pale curve of her neck to her full, pink lips I had to suppress a shudder. My wanting to possess her, body and soul, was now a constant thirst that seemed like it would never be quenched. Since we had come to this new understanding and I knew she wanted to marry me as much as I longed to be her husband, I could hardly wait for that day to arrive.
In the past I had jokingly told Bella she would be the death of me, but after tonight's activities in the restaurant, it wasn't so much of a joke any more. When she ran her warm, soft hand up and down my thigh I thought I would explode from wanting her. I was assailed with a torrent of longing to feel all of her heated flesh pressed against my cold, hard frame. I kept reminding myself that there were rules of etiquette that must be followed, and even so I was almost panting with desire. Bella was so pure and innocent; she had no idea what she was doing to me. I could tell by the look on her face when I stopped her.
She had merely been expressing herself and I again had to put a halt to that, something a normal young man would not have had to do. There were so many things I could not do with her, and it was becoming more and more difficult for me to deal with.
After I made her aware of her effect on me, her scent changed and I could tell it had stimulated a similar response in her. It took everything I had to restrain myself from taking her up on her tempting offer to visit the Ladies Room. I was definitely going to have a talk with Rosalie and Emmett when we got home.
I felt like a monster when I looked into Bella's sweet face, so open and accepting of me, and I knew that I was nearing a point where I could not continue without possibly putting her life at risk. It was agony for me, and it had to be wearing on her spirit.
I was going further today than I ever had, holding her, kissing her with more passion, and she had said my kisses were incredible. That was the absolute truth; it was miraculous that I could control the demon inside me who lusted after her blood when she pressed her warm lips against mine. Any intimate contact with her was some kind of miracle. We both yearned for so much more, and no matter how closely I held her, it wasn't enough. It was never enough where she was concerned.
I would like to believe that I could thrill her in the way she did me. Her body seemed to respond appropriately, with a racing pulse and erratic heartbeat; then there was the dizziness and fainting. Of course Bella had so little in the way of experience, her assessment of my kissing expertise was somewhat suspect. She had only the hot, forced kisses of the mongrel with which to compare, and we could not be more different. I knew she had resisted his sloppy, unwelcome advances for as long as she could. I would forever regret granting him the opportunity to besmirch her pristine lips with his wet dog stench.
Only for a few seconds of their last kiss had she responded at all, as he was so happy to replay for my benefit. She had thrown herself into those last few moments with abandon, much more than she had ever been allowed to do with me. It was ludicrous that my cold, dead heart could feel so much pain at the mere thought of her body being enveloped by his heat. Although the mutt was an animal with anger management problems, she had still been safer kissing him than she was with me.
In the end, Bella had chosen me instead of him. Of course I wondered how much choice was truly involved. She knew the Volturi had not forgotten about her, no matter what I had told her about their view of time. Jane's horrid little visit after Victoria was disposed of had put an end to that pathetic charade. Bella had to know the clock was ticking, and it was laughable to think that the wolves could protect her from the Volturi, if it came to that. So what choice did she have, really? Had she figured this out, or did she still actually prefer my cold hands on her in place of his hot ones?
Bella never shied away from my touch; in fact she actively sought it. She frequently threw herself at me, much to my delight and terror. Against my will I would feel the venom filling my mouth, and I would have to quickly swallow it before kissing her, the love I felt for her overwhelming every other instinct.
Perhaps Bella did love me with all her heart. If she did, it was truly amazing, after the way I had lied to her and rejected her. She did not have to forgive me, or race to Volterra to save me from my misbegotten act of desperation. I know she loved me then; she had not yet shared any intimate moments with the dog back then. He had been just a pup, no threat at all.
I had to stop thinking like this; it was not productive at all, and would only lead to my doubting her and making her unhappy. It was too dangerous to experiment with her fragile body, and I was so frustrated by not being able to be with her as I desired, I was seeking other places to lay the blame. The problem was not of her making, it was mine, and I would just have to accept the blame and not take it out on her.
Bella was the only creature who had ever been able to alleviate the bleak hopelessness I felt because of what I was, and provide me with a reason to believe tomorrow might be worth moving off the sofa for. She made me happier than I had any right to be and I wanted to do everything I could to ease her mind about our future together. It was important that she comprehended exactly what she meant to me and how much I loved her. She was human, but today had proved that I could be more the kind of man she wants and needs me to be. The wedding was fast approaching and she was right, we did need to further our physical relationship.
I needed to conquer my doubts about her feelings for that hound and put them to rest. He had been there to help her out of her blackest depression when I left her, but with what? Motorcyles and extreme sports; dangerous physical activities. They had nothing in common, intellectually. I doubt that he had ever read Wruthering Heights or that he could quote Romeo and Juliet if his mangy life depended on it. He could never entertain her at the piano the way I could. He never would have been able to follow the intricate dialog and existential philosophy of the play this afternoon, and Bella had loved it. Her eyes had sparkled and she had been so lost in thought as we left the theater; he probably would have taken her hang gliding so she could break her leg, again.
Being jealous of a memory was just foolish and I couldn't afford to make any more stupid mistakes. I had not invited that mutt along on this trip in body and I needed to dispel his spirit as well. The past was just that, past. We had a whole eternity upon which to focus. Bella's actions today indicated that she may have had cared about him once, but she couldn't make it plainer that she was now eager to return my feelings fully and completely.
No matter how much of myself I revealed to her she never offered even a hint of rejection, not by her words or her deeds. How did I get so lucky? It was no wonder I thought of our relationship as something as fragile as a soap bubble, floating through the air, about to explode and disappear with the next strong breeze.
Bella was so light and ephemeral, a delicate goddess whose time on earth as a human being was limited, even more severely limited by her association with me, a demon trapped inside a perpetually youthful facade. She and Carlisle might be right; perhaps I did have a soul. I had committed the most unforgivable sins yet they both forgave me. There was something inside me that made me value Bella more than myself; made me want to love and protect her until the end of time; was that my soul? I couldn't remember ever having these feelings before meeting her, but my memories of my boyhood had faded and were almost completely gone now. I knew I had never been in love before, and I had fought so hard against it before giving in to the unknown emotion that brought me to Bella… that brought me to life.
At this point I could not find it within myself to blame Carlisle any more for his decision to create a companion. How could I? I was posed to do the same thing to Bella. If I had died at my natural time, I would never have known the kind of love Bella so freely gave to me. I was almost convinced Bella was an angel, sent to the rainy little town of Forks to tempt me with the siren's call of her blood. By my resisting that temptation, perhaps she could provide my salvation… and restore my soul, if that was even possible.
I was beginning to allow myself to believe that she was sure I would never leave her again. That comment she made about Dante abandoning his girlfriend in the woods had been enlightening. It had stung at first, but I recognized that if Bella could make that kind of attempt at humor, she must feel more secure with the tenuous bond we've struggled to establish after my condescending, foolish action.
I would build on that tonight, letting Bella know the myriad reasons why I loved her were not dependent on her being human, and how she was the most special woman in the world. I must stop hesitating when I touch her, and find a way to please her without being too forceful. I would do anything to make her as happy as she has made me and she needed to know that. I still had many plans for this evening, and she deserved to be relaxed and carefree while she still could.
Bella's POV
"Wake up sleeping beauty," I heard my angel's voice in my ear. I lay still, breathing in the warm night air. I opened my eyes to see a dark, clear wide sky with the biggest blue moon I had ever seen. Of course I couldn't remember ever seeing a true blue moon before, but still, this was impressive.
As I woke up I was lying flat on my back on a wooden pier looking up at the sky.
"How did I get here?" I asked, sleepily.
"You fell into a cheese-induced coma." That beautiful crooked smile made an appearance. Edward was sitting cross-legged next to me, holding my hand.
"Hmm," was my unintelligible response as my eyes drifted shut again.
"You were exhausted and fell asleep in the car. I brought you here; it was a big day," he explained, stroking my cheek gently, "but I didn't think you would want to miss this. Open those beautiful eyes, my little inert mass."
I did so and watched as he gestured toward the moon.
"It's beautiful. It really is a blue moon. Where are we?" I asked, finally awake.
"The Boathouse pier on Tomales Bay; this is where the wedding is going to take place tomorrow. I thought it would be a good place to partake of an ancient custom."
Before I could ask him what kind of ancient custom, I heard an owl in the pine tree behind us, next to the Boathouse. "Who whoo whoo whooo. Who whoo whoo whooo."
"Is he looking for a mate, too?" I inquired lazily.
"He's calling to his mate."
From across the bay we heard the answering call. The same deep, low series of hoots. The storm clouds that had threatened all afternoon had disappeared and the night air was sultry and tropical, with a light, warm breeze whispering through the massive forest beyond the Boathouse. Then soundlessly a large, white owl flew out of the pine tree behind us, directly over us and across the bay to another stand of trees. The white owl silhouetted against the deep blue moon was otherworldly.
"Is that some kind of an omen, Edward? Or part of the ancient custom you started to tell me about?"
"Not that I know of. You remember we passed the Audubon Canyon Ranch this morning? West Marin has an enormous amount of migratory birds; it's probably difficult to be outside and not see or hear a bird."
"It was so strange, the way it flew between us and the moon. I think it was trying to send us a message, but I don't know what it was trying to tell us. It was like something out of dream."
He lay down on his side next to me, propping himself up on one elbow so he could look down into my eyes.
"You are like something out of a dream, Bella. The sweetest dream I could ever have."
"You're like a dream come true to me," I said honestly.
He leaned over and I felt his velvet lips gently touch mine; he really was like a dream. He made me feel like Sleeping Beauty, but I couldn't shake the feeling that the owl flying over us was a bad omen.
He leaned back on his elbow again and smiled down at me.
"What do you know about owl mythology, Edward?"
"Not very much; owls generally represent wisdom. You know, the wise old owl; but this area is so rich in all kinds of wildlife, not just birds. In December and January the whales migrate by here; we could go out to the lighthouse on the Point tomorrow and I could show you where we can swim with them."
"What? We can swim with migrating whales?"
"Yes, Emmett and I have done it before. It can be fun; they do not view us as predators so we can get quite close."
"Are you saying that I will be able to swim with whales?"
"Yes, I suppose so; one day in the not too distant future. Does that sound like fun?"
"It sure does. I hadn't even thought about doing things like that."
"I have to admit it will be nice when you are not so breakable," he said wistfully.
I had to agree with him, and it was a good sign that Edward could say something like that. It meant that he was able to see me as a vampire, and even imagine doing something fun and dangerous, like swimming with whales. Well, I guess it wouldn't be dangerous after I was changed and the possibility of drowning was no longer a problem.
For him to even mention it made me so ridiculously happy. He wasn't thinking about keeping me human; he was imagining me as a vampire. I could barely contain my excitement. I knew what it must have cost him to tell me something like this. It was a terrible bargain but there would be a few advantages. So far I hadn't allowed myself to think about things like that.
I was just concentrating on being with Edward; that would be enough, but to know that other physical activities would be possible gave my imagination a jump start. The forbidden thrills of snowboarding sprang to mind. Even if I hit a tree it wouldn't matter. Just doing anything physical with Edward would be fun. I couldn't allow myself to think about that too much right now or I would spontaneously combust.
Edward was looking down at me with a beautiful smile on his face. He took his fingertip and traced the outline of my lips. Then he spoke.
"Now for the reason I brought you here. There are many myths surrounding the blue moon. One ancient legend says that if two people in love make a wish on the blue moon that the wish will come true before the next blue moon, but they must have a true love, be soul mates."
"I think we qualify for that, don't you?"
"Yes, I know we do."
I was ecstatic to hear him say that; it must mean he thought he had a soul. "Do we need to say the wish out loud?"
"No, you can make a silent wish in your heart."
I took his hand and placed in on my heart. "You can make a wish on my heart, too."
He leaned over and gave me another soft kiss. I thrilled to the feeling of his lips on mine.
"Do you know what you are going to wish for?" He sounded amused.
I was taking this seriously. "Yes. I know exactly what I'm wishing for. What about you?"
"Yes." Edward lay down beside me, slipping his arm under my shoulder, and we both gazed up at the huge blue moon. It was so quiet. The only sound was the play of the gentle waves lapping against the pier. The Boathouse was dark, and it was the only structure on this stretch of the Bay, so it felt like we were the only two people in the world.
I looked into the night sky illuminated by the mysterious blue moon with one thought. 'I wish to be with Edward forever. Don't let anything separate us.' I didn't care if we had good times or bad times. All I wanted was to know he would be by my side. That was all that mattered. We could get through anything together.
I was still holding his hand over my heart and he leaned over and kissed me again.
"Now we have to wait until the next blue moon to see if our wishes came true," he whispered.
"When is the next blue moon?"
"New Year's Eve, 2009," he replied quickly.
"How do you know these things?"
"I enjoy a rare phenomenon, such as you, my angel."
"This has been a rare day. Thank you, Edward. I would be happy to stay in our cabin for 48 hours, but going into San Francisco was so much fun. You're the perfect tour guide."
He was silent for a moment and then he said, "What did you wish for?"
I laughed; did he need to know everything? "The same thing I always wish for; to be with you forever. What did you wish for?"
"You'll see soon enough. It won't take 'til the next blue moon for my wish to come true."
That made me think it must be something about the wedding. He was so eager to make me his wife.
"Will you let me know when it comes true?" I asked solemnly.
"Yes. You will be there," he said seductively.
I giggled. "You're an awful tease. You're really enjoying this, aren't you?"
"What's not to enjoy? You look so beautiful in this moonlight. Your skin is glowing and you look like some kind of magical creature."
"Well you ought to know one when you see one. You are a magical creature. You're sparkling a little bit in this moonlight, too. Not the same as in the sunshine, but I can see some sparkle."
"I think it helps that you know what to look for," he said, a bemused expression on his face.
"You think it helps that I'm delusional."
"I know that helps." Edward brushed his fingertips across my cheek and I snuggled up against him. We looked up at the moon, filling the sky over our heads. It looked so close I could almost reach up and touch it.
"The Chinese believe that the man in the moon can tie people together with an invisible, silken cord," Edward said reflectively. "At the very moment they fall in love, he draws the silken cords together. Then, even if apart, sweethearts can watch the Full Moon at the same time and feel as if they are together."
"I'll try to remember that the next time I see the moon from my bedroom window if you're not there with me, but it won't be very long before I don't a have bedroom window anymore."
"Whatever do you mean, Bella?"
"Well, I won't have one, we will have one. I'm really looking forward to that."
"So am I." His voice held conviction and I smiled at the sound of it.
We lay there for a while, not saying anything, just looking up at the moon. I thought about how different my life had become since I had left Phoenix and moved to Forks. It was the same night sky everywhere but I was not the same, and soon my life would be over and just beginning at the same time.
Edward propped himself up on his elbow and peered down at me. "You have no idea how beautiful you are, do you?"
I smiled and said sarcastically, "I have a mirror."
"Yes, but the shame is you do not see yourself properly. Shall I tell you how beautiful you are?" Then he leaned down and kissed me before I could answer.
I wasn't going to object to this, I thought as his lips moved gently against mine.
When he broke the kiss he looked down at me said tenderly, "You're beautiful because you're kind. You're always willing to offer help," and then he kissed me again.
"You're beautiful because you don't take things for granted. You know how to show your appreciation." He held my hand up and kissed my palm.
"You're beautiful because you're compassionate, you can't stand to see anyone in pain," followed by another kiss on my lips.
I was beginning to think I could manage to listen to this outrageous flattery if it was going to be accompanied by a kiss every time.
"You're beautiful because you're a good sport. You're always willing to take a chance and try something new, even when it frightens you." A reassuring kiss, gentle and soft.
"You're beautiful because you're generous, you're always giving." This kiss went on longer than the ones before, as he was trying to repay me for being so giving.
We were both breathless when he pulled away. "Are you beginning to understand just how beautiful you are, or should I continue?" he asked, the gleam in his eyes telling me there was no way I could stop him even if I wanted to.
"Do as you please," I replied softly, you will anyway.
He smiled my favorite crooked smile before saying, "You're beautiful because you're brave; you have the heart of a lion." He slowly brought his lips to hover just above mine and then he said, "You know, lion is my favorite," and then he kissed me, hard and fast.
I had barely recovered from that when he said, "You're beautiful because you're loyal beyond what is reasonable." He lowered his head and placed a soft kiss at the base of my neck where my pulse was throbbing erratically.
"You're beautiful because you're sympathetic; you opened your heart to Rosalie, even after she had treated you so unfairly." A big kiss, his lips pressing against mine and lingering.
I clutched my arms around his neck and held on. I was getting lightheaded but it was oh so pleasant.
He sat up again and looked into my eyes with so much love. "You're beautiful because you're refreshing. Because I can't read your mind, you frequently surprise me with the things you say and do, and you do not have average reactions in any case." He kissed me three times, quickly in succession, giving me a little time to breath in between. At this point I was more interested in the feel of his lips than the words coming out of them.
"You're beautiful because you're sincere. You mean what you say, and it's so easy to tell when you're trying to lie," followed by a slow, sweet kiss.
"You're beautiful because you're genuine. There isn't anything fake about you." His fingertips stroked my cheek as he kissed me and then smiled.
"You're beautiful because you're patient. I know how hard it is to wait, and you make it look easy." This kiss was so full of feeling it left me weak and trembling. He was really spelling out for me all the things that he loved about me, in his own special way. There was no one else like Edward and I couldn't ask for a more tender, caring man. He seemed to know exactly what I needed to hear.
"You're beautiful because you're so forgiving. I know that better than anyone." Another slow, deep kiss; his cool lips had grown warm by now from all the contact with mine, and his icy tongue traced the shape of my mouth, providing a delicious contrast.
"You're beautiful because you're unique. No one will ever smell as good as you, have skin as soft as yours, lips as full and tempting…" his voice drifted off and he was looking into my eyes with such intensity I couldn't move, I could hardly breath. When his lips touched mine I felt lightening sparks shooting through my veins and I clung to him as tightly as I could as our lips moved together.
"You're beautiful because you're so trusting. You put your faith in me, even though I'm the greatest threat—"
I reached up and put my hand on his lips. "Stop it. You are no threat at all. You would never hurt me, you couldn't, and I won't let you say that."
He held my hand to his lips and kissed my palm.
"You're beautiful because you're my everything. You are my love, my friend, my family. You bring the sunshine, and when you are happy, I am ecstatic. When you are sad, I am miserable. When I am away from you all I can think about it getting back to you and when I am with you, I feel a peace I have never known before."
He buried his head in my neck and kissed his way from my ear down to my shoulder. I wondered if he was doing that to keep me from seeing his face after he said that, because I was trying hard not to cry and I think if I had looked into his eyes I wouldn't have been able to stop the tears from falling. It touched me so much that he thought of me that way. He had told me before that I was his everything and I was beginning to understand what that meant to him. He rested his head on my shoulder and just held me for a while until I regained my composure. I was sure he could tell when I had calmed down from how my heart was beating.
He sighed and then continued, "You're beautiful because you're stubborn."
I raised my eyebrows and the look on my face challenged him to explain how that could make me beautiful.
"If you hadn't been so persistent, I never would have been forced to reveal… who I am, and we would not be here today." His lips pressed against mine softly, almost as if it were our first kiss. I wound my fingers in his hair, tugging him closer.
When his lips left mine his voice was low and intense as he said, "Your slightest touch ignites a passion in me I didn't know was possible, and when you tell me that you want me…" and then he captured my lips in a fierce kiss.
He was holding himself above me, one arm around my back and one hand at my waist. As he deepened the kiss, my heart throbbed frantically. I covered his hand with mine, and started sliding it up smoothly over the thin material of my blouse, past my ribs until I came to the edge of my bra. That was enough of an indication of what I wanted, but I wouldn't force him. The next move would have to be his. I ran my hand up his arm to his shoulder, giving it a squeeze before I continued up to run my hand over the skin at his neck.
For a moment it seemed as if he stopped breathing, but he slowly moved his lips away from mine and said, "I love you, Bella, with every fiber of my being," before kissing me again, and moving his hand up to caress my breast. The silk of my blouse and lace of the bra hardly made any impression under his cool hand. I could feel his gentle massage and heard myself make some unknown sound in the back of my throat. He rubbed his thumb back and forth and I arched my back in response, trying to get closer to him as I parted my lips and he moaned, too. His icy tongue plunged in, thrusting and rolling, and he tasted so sweet. I was so happy that he was finally allowing himself to touch me the way I wanted him to, I thought I might lose my mind.
I could feel his hips pressing against mine and I struggled to get even closer to him. We kissed for an interminable time before he pulled away, both of us gasping for breath. He moved his lips to my neck and lower, burning a trail along my collarbone. He left his hand where it was though, I was pleased to note, as if now that he had passed that invisible barrier he was proclaiming his right to be there. I couldn't stop smiling and I hoped he could hear the joy in my voice as I said, "I love you, Edward, you make me so happy."
He raised his face to look down at me and his eyes were dark and blazing. The electricity that flowed between us was so strong I thought I felt the vibration shaking my body. "Do you understand now how beautiful and desirable you are?" he asked, his voice raw with emotion.
I couldn't speak but I blushed and nodded. Never taking his eyes away from mine, he started moving his hand down past my waist, over my hip, across my thigh until he took my calf in his firm grasp, rolled us to the side and pulled my leg up suddenly, hitching it over his hip bringing us closer together than ever. He lowered his mouth to mine again, his lips moving boldly. I couldn't help it, I just had to ease my tongue out to taste his sweet lips. I was almost positive I was losing my mind now. I saw fireworks and my body shook.
He pulled back and over his shoulder in the dark night sky and the deep blue moon there was a huge sparkling silver firework display. I gasped. "Edward, there are fireworks."
"There are always fireworks when you kiss me," he murmured. Another rocket launched and with a boom a large red chrysanthemum bloomed in the sky, shooting sparks in every direction.
He lay down on his back again and I snuggled against him as he wrapped his arms around me. "Do you like them? They are just for you," he said softly.
Another burst into view, shooting out a big white circle with little shooting stars flying down towards the sparkling water of the Bay.
"You are amazing." I couldn't believe this was my life, as I watched a brilliant golden rocket streak high in the sky before exploding and raining tiny sparks across the dark sky.
Then, one after another, three flares shot up and burst open, filling the sky with what looked like huge, luminous white dandelion heads silhouetted against the blue moon.
As quickly as they had begun, they were over. We lay there for a moment, watching the wisps of smoke trail away in the light breeze.
"That was so beautiful, Edward. How ever did you arrange that?"
"They are going to have fireworks here tomorrow night at the wedding reception, but we will not be here for that; we will be back in Forks by then. So I arranged for a little test firing to take place tonight, just for you."
"You have made this weekend unforgettable, Edward, simply magical." I reached up and traced his perfect lips with my fingertip. "This is a tough act to follow. How is the honeymoon going to top this?"
"I think I will be able to come up with something. You inspire me, you know."
I shivered in anticipation, quivering with the thoughts Edward inspired in me.
"Are you getting cold? Should we go now?" Edward's voice was velvet.
"I'm not really cold but we could go if you want."
He gracefully stood up and gathered me into his arms. "I can walk, Edward."
"When will you get the idea that I love having any excuse to take you in my arms? The planks in this old wooden pier are too rough and uneven to have you walking on them by moonlight. We don't want you tumbling into the bay now, do we? You are the perfect shark bait, you know."
I looked dubiously at the dark water as he made his way from the pier to the where the car was parked in a small lot by the side of the Boathouse. I didn't see any sharks but then I hadn't expected to see a white owl fly over my head, a gigantic blue moon, or fireworks, either. With Edward I never knew what to expect.
AN: I hope you will review now and let me know how it's going. I also want to give a big thank you to everyone who added Blue Moon to their Favorite Stories List. That really helps spread the word and I am so appreciative. Big hugs all around for my lovely readers. The story is going through at least Sunday night, so there's plenty more to come.
My beta, Ranma15177, has three great stories going right now, and you all should be reading and reviewing them. There is a link to her on my Favorite Stories list, and she's recently added new chapters to Conversations with Emmett and Making A Home. Her action/adventure fic, Escaping Sol, is a real thrill ride. If you aren't already on board, I urge you to scamper over there and check it out.
I'd like to express gratitude to my other beta, not done baking, a wonderful writer herself, for the valuable contributions she has made to this story.