Wingman (Completed)
by jaymack33
authors note: Miley and Jake are approximately 18-19 in this story, you do the math! Yes I made this story a two-shot.
chapter 2- Miley Finds Out
Previously in chapter 1: Jackson tricks Jake into taking him out and is about to try to get Jake to be his wingman at a club and Miley is about to find out about Jackson's plan and she's...
And Now:
Miley, Lilly and Oliver shuffle into her dark house. Miley tosses her keys on the table obliviously. Lilly has stopped to a dead halt. Pointing furiously at the object in question laying mere inches from where Miley tossed the keys. Oliver halts too and in tandem with Lilly starts pointing at the thing waiting for Miley to turn around as she grabs some orange juice and pours it out. And she lifts her cup to her mouth and then she sees the flowers laying on the table and orange juice starts flying out. What!...
We tried to tell you! Lilly stated!
Yes we did Oliver threw in!
Well tell me a little with something called talking for a change! Hello people!
She sees them pointing at something again. And Miley gives up with her two pathetic friends and their weird antics as she focuses on the card next to the giant flowers with a huge Miley sign on it, that they are pointing at.
She picks it up and:
Hey baby, it's Jake! Why don't you and me and me and you, censored!...lets just say it had something to do with hot oil and throwing all of their clothes out a window! Awwwww...how sweet!
Now, normally this type of stuff got Miley all hot and bothered in a good way. Now, she was still hot and bothered, but in a different way. I mean why would he come in with that and just leave. And leave no message to freaking boot! And then she saw Lilly and Oliver pointing at something again right by the answering machine. She shrugged her shoulders God those two are hopeless...Augggh! As she Miley stomped over to the object of their latest attention.
Besides the fact the answering machine wasn't plugged in she saw a little note in big letters and in crayon ...Jackson!
Come on bro, please? I'm desperate. Come on just give me a couple of minutes. A few minutes of just a little bit of your mojo and I'll be set. You help me out and I'll be more than glad to tell you anything else you need to know about Miley. Jake looked at Jackson. He looked at his watch. Hell, he wasn't with Miley, what else was he going to do in this spoiled evening. What the hell. Come on! As Jackson dragged Jake by his arm along the way.
Meanwhile Stewart residence:
Jackson's Plan (in Crayon and spelling challenged)
1 Dad out of town chek.
2 Use up all of the juce in her sell fone.
3 Delete all ansering mashine mesages(especially the ones from Jake.
4 Strategicaly place mall sale advertising on the table.
5 When Miley is gone manipulated completely like a total mark by yours truly I will then intersept Jake and.
6. Convince him how much Miley luvs me and that I can give him a lot of insite into how she thinks.
7. Git him to take me around the town and posibly, The Viper Room where he can be my wingman and help me to get a girl, or 2, or 3.
8. Bask in my victory muahahaha!
Miley was calm. Miley was cool. Miley was pissed! But still she held on clinging to her outward facade as Oliver and Lilly hovered over her in shadow form.
Well you know Jackson's writing ability is getting better Oliver threw in. Some of the words were actually spelled right Lilly threw in too!
Still Miley kept her cool...outwardly as her mind raced along a dark path of destruction.
You know Jake probably did call you earlier and you were wrong to worry about Jake now that your brother has got him out there underage in some club trying to use Jake as bait for hot older chicks. Oliver laughed as Lilly plastered a weak fake smile laughing along hoping the time bomb doesn't go off.
Kaboom! Not helping Oliver! I don't want to hear it goodbye! Well fine we're going. We're going already! As Lilly was about to leave she felt Miley's grip on her wrist. No, not you. Just the boy. I am tired of what they do to us! I'm tired of waiting on them and I need to turn the corner. My brother has not had the last laugh. I am going to that club. And when I do with your help Lilly, Muahahaha!
The Viper Room:
Yo, Jake do you think you can go in there, I mean come to think of it, that is a big line and how old are you again? Jake thought about it for a second, looking around to make sure a phantom Miley doesn't appear. He asked the first person in line can I jump ahead. It didn't take long before the line pointed in his direction. He had signed a lot of autographs and then he turned at 6 ft 6 of muscle and a head. Excuse me are you old enough to enter this club? Well, I..um, I don't...Jackson laughed at a rare moment in time when Jake seemed to be losing his cool.
Jake goes look I mean I'm almost old enough... no not you Mr. Ryan I'm talking about your friend over here? Your more than welcome to enter our club Mr. Ryan. It's been a while hasn't it? Oh, yes, I can vouch for my friend he actually might be the legal one. Well let's just keep that between me and you go right in Mr. Ryan. Jackson pumped his fist yes and stuck his tongue out at the line behind him as the door shut behind him. Dang, oh no don't tell me I did all of this for nothing. As the bouncer started to slowly loom over at Jackson and Jackson started to sweat and brace himself for..
...Oh there you are Jake came out opening the door and dragging him inside. Come on!
Miley/Hanna's room;
Miley showed Lilly an outfit. How about this? Lilly shook her head. She had looked at 100's of outfits. Her eyes were getting cross. Her neck had kinks in it, and why did Hanna have to buy a second Hanna closet? She was barely finished the first! And finally Miley pulled out a red dress and Lilly's eyes popped out. What do you think too much. Well speak Lillian. Say something. What do I have to do phone a friend now? Lilly finally composed herself. That's the one! That should knock Heartbreak Jake right on his ass! You go girl! With a big smile on Miley's face as she looked in the mirror let's rock!...but first make up check!
Now how am I supposed to do this again Jackson?
Oh, come on your Jake Ryan, you can't shake a stick without running into a line of girls heading your way.
I know that, but I'm in love with your sister, I'm not exactly on the market.
I know that, and( I figured I'd throw in there) she's a great girl. A really great girl. And...and (I struggle not to stick my finger in my throat from nauseousness) your very lucky to have her. I just need you to kind of dangle yourself out there just a little bit and maybe throw a girl or two my way.
Well no matter what you say, I am not cheating on Miley no matter what, and second you make it sound like I can just wave my arm out and some girl is going to just roll in and...lo and behold a blond rolled right into Jake's right arm. Alright, bad example, but I wave my other arm it isn't going to...and now I have a brunette in my other arm.
Hey Jake, we love you so much! You looked so lonely over there all by yourself. Can Jake come out and play they sang in unison?
Jake flashed the award (Emmy nominated) winning smile of his as he nervously looked to Jackson and then back to the hot girls. And then back to Jackson. Look ladies, you see I have a problem. This is my best friend and he's new in town and until I find someone for him I really can't go any further than that. Can you help? Can we help, why sure sugar. Anything for you Jakey! Anything!
Can't this freaking limo go any faster Hanna hissed at Lola! Well gee Hanna from what your driver told me the mph meter is around the normal high speed level of all paparazzi in hot pursuit of Hanna mode. So, I really don't think it can go any faster than that!
Ooooh, that damned brother of mine. If he blows this thing between me and Jake, ooooh, I'll just have to kill him. Damn him! Can you remind me how my brother is even in the same species as me let alone part of my family?
Well, Robbie Ray and his brother Uncle Earl are the sons of...
Not, helping Lilly! I know that jackass of a brother is blood related, but how? I mean come on there is no one and I mean no one in my family who is that mean and, and evil!
Well there is Luann!
I wasn't asking for examples Lilly I just mean, why now? Why me? Why can't Jackson mess up something else. My relationship with Jake has been pretty good lately. No, drama. Just a great boyfriend and then that stupid brother of mine! GRRRRRRRRRR!
Just remember you are still Hanna Montana and you have to set an example to the kids. You have to set an example while you illegally go into a club underage!
Hey if Jake Ryan can do it so can I! After all. I'm a big star too you know!
Jake was drinking. He was getting hammered as he watched Jackson laughing along with a hot blond. Come on Jackson. She does love me doesn't she? He slurred! As another girl rubbed Jake's head. Oh come on Jakey, don't act like I'm not here. I'm not attractive enough for you? Jake took a look at her drunkenly and even in his slightly tipsy haze Miley's beautiful face recaptured his thoughts as he turned back around to Jackson. Come on Jackson tell me again. She does love me right?
Of course she does Jake. That's what I keep trying to tell you. She is absolutely insane when it comes to how she feels about you! Totally, totally insane!
Damn it Jake! Your making me insane! How, could he fall for some stupid plan of Jackson's? In crayon mind you! I mean you have to really fall off that turnip truck to fall for something that idiot came up with! Grrrrr...
Well technically you fell for it too...Lola whispered as Hanna's head swivelled towards her menacingly.
What did you just say?--Hanna stated with a scary glazed over angry, but disturbingly cool look. The disturbing smile hiding the insanity didn't help much either!
Nothing!--Lola cowered as she tried to look away in a feigned nonchalance.
That's what I thought you said! Now, can't this thing go any faster?
--Hanna banged at the front partition of her limo.
There you go again!--Lola whispered
What did you just say?--Hanna shouted.
Nothing!--Lola sing songed like she was talking to a little child.
Jake watched as Jackson was getting down in the dance floor. He seemed pretty happy. Jake drank some more as some annoying, girl breathed warmly in his ear asking him to go out on the dance floor with her. Jake just stared at his drink and drank hoping he would find Miley on the other side of his little trip. I thought she would wait for me. I mean I know it's a little strange she didn't call me back to confirm, but she usually knows I'm coming over. Why wasn't she there this time. Where could she be? Oh, Jakey I'm right here handsome! Jake looked back at the strange pretty girl trying to hug him and all he could think was where his girl was right now. Right at this time!
Hanna quickly left the limo with Lola following far behind.
Come on Hanna, wait up!
I have to catch him before he does something stupid!
And what if he does are you going to do something stupid too?
Hanna just looked at Lola! Come on! As she dragged her by the arm and then they turned the corner and wow, look at the line!
God, Hanna how are we going to get in there?
If Jake got in so can I. I just got to think what would Jake do? Well Lola?
Oh you talking to me?
Yes, you! What should I do?
Lola whispered something in Hanna's ears that she thought would be a typical Jake Ryan move. And a big Hanna smile came into place.
Umm, excuse me can I go ahead?
A girl with five nose rings and a flaming skull tattoo on her forehead turned around angrily at the annoying interloper. She turned around facing Hanna angrily heaving with annoyance as she gazed at Hanna Montana!
Hanna started having second thoughts as her past anger faded to a tinge of fear! She watched the angry glare and all she could say was, "Mommy!"
The punk girl grimacing walked toward Hanna menacingly and then said...oh, my God! It's Hanna Montana! I'm your biggest fan! Biggest fan! And then the line slowly pointed towards Hanna as she signed a lot of autographs and slowly made her way to 6 ft 6 of muscle and a head! He menacingly loomed over Hanna and Lola! A giant shadow seemed to envelop them, "Mommy!" And then the heating grate literally blew up some of Hanna's skirt ala Marilyn Monroe! Hanna held her skirt from flying all of the way up and then waved her award winning smile and 6 ft 6 of muscle came over to her to say...
Hanna Montana, it is an honor that your here, come right on in. She did and the body guard wiped some of the sweat off of his face and waved some air at his face at how hot she looked in that dress.
And now a second girl was trying to drag Jake by the dance floor. Come on Jake dance with me? No, me! No, me! They start fighting as even more girls start to surround him as a new song comes on...
(Flo Rida Featuring T-Pain- Low)
Hanna walked in with Lola and all of the guys around her felt their mouths literally smacking on the floor at how hot she looked, in her red dress. They gasped as the music kicked in...
"Shawty had them Apple Bottom Jeans Jeans Boots with the fur With the fur the whole club was lookin at her She hit the floor She hit the floor Next thing you know Shawty got low low low low low low low low!"
Hanna danced along with the beat with Lola right behind her doing a comical dance of her own to the Low song as Hanna looked for her man. There he was as she ignored the gaping of the guys around her. She seethed at the women who were pulling at Jake's arms. Grrrr! But she continued to dance toward him and then their eyes met...song continues...
"Them baggy sweat pants And the Reeboks with the straps With the straps She turned around and gave that big booty a smack Ayy She hit the floor She hit the floor Next thing you know Shawty got low low low low low low low low!"
Jake's drunkenness faded to total sobriety quickly as he saw the prettiest girl he had ever seen otherwise known as his girlfriend in the hottest dress he had ever seen her in. Her breasts were accentuated perfectly. Her hips, her legs, her shoulders, her long sexy neck, he took it all in at once and then his green eyes darkened with lust as they locked onto her smokey blue ones. His mouth fell open inadvertently as the girls pulling at his arms faded to background noise along with the current song playing in the distance...
Hanna seethed at all of the girls pulling at Jake. She saw him approaching her and the background noise of guys asking her to dance came into focus as she turned to the first guy she had heard clearly and said yes and away she went.
Jake couldn't believe it. She looked so freaking hot and she was dancing. Dancing with...someone else! His heart felt like falling as he went from being turned on to despondent in mere seconds. Why me? Why now? Honestly I didn't do anything. He felt a girl asking him to dance with him and finally he said screw it! And he started dancing with the girl. He cast a glance at Hanna every chance he could and continued to go along with the dance.
Hanna's anger was at full fury mode as she saw Jake dancing with some girl. She totally ignored whoever was dancing with her as she fumed. You, know Jake would be kind of hot in that blazer if he wasn't a two timing cheating bastard right now! She yelled in her own head. She looked at that stupid annoying blond with the fake breasts and the the long legs! Grrrr, damn you Jackson for blowing this for me as she grabbed her partner and danced with a renewed fury!
Jake seethed with anger. He was stone cold sober now as he totally ignored the girl dancing with him and raged at every touch or imagined touch the guy was doing with his girl.
They were now dancing mere inches from each other. Hanna and Jake literally were staring at each other with anger as they stopped dancing. It was almost like a who blinks first contest which of course Hanna won quite easily. The last time she took her eyes off this cheater he ended up, here now cheating on her in the Viper Room. He's disgusting! She bolted. And Jake ran after her.
Lola meanwhile was sipping at some fruit punch. Gee this is fruity. Oh, and it tastes so gooood! I wonder what's in this thing and the next thing she knows she's dancing obliviously in the club in a drunken haze of her own.
Please Hanna wait up. Hold on! She refused to look at him. She was so mad and filled with fury. A lot of people in the club simply stopped what they were doing as the two celebrities seemed to be in a fight.
Jake reached out for her shoulder and it felt cold to his touch as she flinched. Please Hanna? Why are you mad at me? What did I do?
Hanna turns around to face Jake angrily: What did you do? Where do I begin? Jake are you a freaking idiot? You diss me at my home! You fall for some stupid cockamamie plan of Jackson's! You go underage to a club! Your cavorting with older women doing and planning God knows what and you dare ask me...were you drinking Jake?
First of all sweetheart! I came to your house expecting you and you weren't there. So, I went out with your brother in a guys night out on the town! Is it the worst thing in the world to want to get to know people in your family better because of how much I care! Yes I care about you! So, I tried to show off a little bit with your brother, big deal. Now, I'll admit it looked bad that those girls were clinging at me but I didn't do anything with them Hanna! Honest! I swear to God!
Yeah a drunk swearing on something. Total credibility there!
Yeah, well where do you get off on your high horse dressing like that and dancing with the first guy you even look at? I didn't even go that far until you did sweetheart. And you didn't even drink anything. You don't even trust me after all we've been through! After all of the secrets, the trust and time we have shared and I have a freaking innocent guys night out and you totally freak out on me! Maybe this isn't going to work out!
Maybe this isn't.
Fine!
Fine!
They seethe as they stare at each other. There eyes lock full of emotion. Hanna's feet tap inadvertently. Jake's heaving chest goes in and out as their faces approach slowly, closer, closer, closer... They hear oohs and ahhs from the crowd breaking the little spell they had going on. She turns her back on him as she walks away.
Hanna walks as fast as she can and then she feels someone's hand grabbing onto hers.
Jake zeroed in on Hanna as she moved quickly through the crowd. He felt mixed emotions, but it wasn't going to end like this. Not, like this. He reached out and grabbed onto her hand.
Despite her feelings she couldn't shake his hand. Not so much that it was too tight of a grip, just she was scared if she let go, he might actually let go.
She leads him to somewhere private where they can talk.
Her wig comes off and is discarded.
They stare at each other and now, as their lips move and open and close nothing comes out.
All of this time and now they have nothing to say.
Jake can't help but feel his feelings welling up for her again. She's even hotter in that outfit as Miley. He fights the urge to smile at her. He grabs for her other hand too.
Look. Miley. I'm sorry. I don't think I really did anything major wrong, besides maybe the underage drinking, and the getting treated like a star and being allowed in a club I'm technically not allowed in, but trust me your the only girl I care about. I'm in love with you and no one else. And if you don't believe that, well I don't know what else to say. I pull my eyes away from her beautiful blue ones as I just don't have the strength to bear anymore drama today.
Miley waited for Jake to say anything else and those beautiful green eyes which had captured her soul on more than one occasion was just sucking her in again. She wanted to turn away, but she couldn't. Her feet were not responding. She couldn't take her eyes off of him. He was good looking, and sexy as he ever was, but he sounded like he was telling the truth. It's not like I really caught him doing anything major. Hell I kind of provoked him just a leeetle bit when I started dancing with a guy. Maybe I should...
And then she saw him walking away. He was very sad and he couldn't take the silence anymore. If she was going to reject him, I just can't and he bolted and then he felt her soft hand grabbing his and he didn't let go because he was scared she might actually let go!
Look Jake. He didn't turn around. He couldn't do it. And she grabbed him from behind in an embrace. I care. No, I love you too Jake. And you made me go just a little bit off the deep end.
Jake turned around as a smile formed in his face. A little bit off the deep end Miley?
Hey don't push it Jakey as she grabbed his lips with her mouth and nipped at them and slowly, but surely they started making out fast and furiously. Jake was pressing her against the wall as her legs wrapped around his back. Her hands grasped at his blond locks as his rough firm masculine hands started going up and down her neck and then along her cheek and jawline. They gasped for air as they quickly went back for seconds, and thirds and...Miley want to go to my limo?
Your limo or mine? They continued to kiss. Do you think people figured out Jake might be with Hanna yet? I don't know, you know what you have to do, deny, deny, mmmmmph and then they french each other a little more.
Slowly Jake guides her away trying not to show how hot he was for her. They reach his limo and she goes, got any condoms Jake? Hey Jake Ryan always comes prepared. Hey how did you know I'd be here! I didn't, but they were with me when I first thought I was going to see you at your house. Good answer, but what makes you think your going to get lucky now Mr? Oh, just a hunch as he slaps her ass and she yells hey! They go in and then the talking stops.
Wow, I got to dance with hot girls. I got some numbers. What a great day. Umm, Jake? Where are you Jake? Jackson looks around. He suddenly has a fear that he might have been left behind. He sees a limo. It's not where Jake left it, but maybe and then he noticed the HM hood ornament. Oh, shit! He almost bolts, but decides since he doesn't have a ride he knocks and is allowed in as a member of the family. Lilly? Oh, hi Lilly! H-Hi, J-Jackson, hiccup! That fruit juice they gave me was so fruity wheeeeeee! Oh, I love how I feel. She grabs at Jackson's shirt and goes...wheeee...! I don't feel so good as she bends over and spews all over Jackson's pants. Feel better now Lilly! Yeah, just peachy, ohhhhhh my head! Ohhhh, my pants!
Epilogue:
Look Jake, I'm not upset with you anymore. Hell I'm not even sure why I was angry in the first place, just promise me you won't go out carousing with Jackson in the future ok? Wait a second Miley. Look I love you. And I do respect you, and your feelings, but other than some of the bad things that happened it was a fun night right? And Miley smiled as she flipped him over the sofa. Owww, Miley that hurt. I was just kidding honest. And by the way Miley do you still have that dress? Why what did you have in mind? Oh, I don't know you and me and me and you with hot oil...censored and my clothes and your dress out the window. Well dad isn't coming back until tomorrow and we ditched Jackson pretty good and...Jake interrupts..."shut up and kiss me baby." Jake grabbed her mouth in his and that's all she wrote folks.
The End:
Author's end note:The basic concept of this story is that it is in my, He Said She Said universe, but I didn't quite figure out how to get from point A to B yet. This is my image of what a Hanna Montana episode might look like if Jake was a regular cast member and Miley's regular boyfriend. I definitely have a plan for a sequel that I've been toying around with for a while that will be similar in length, but a new type of storyline.