A.N.: Oh gods, I forgot to take into account my back-to-school shopping when I thought up my updating schedule! So um...I can't promise fast updates anymore. Notice I said I can't promise; meaning I may still manage the daily updating. We'll see how it goes!

Chapter 10: Unreadable

A murmur of voices. The ship's gentle swaying. Seagulls. Footsteps. Wait. Footsteps?

Niko shot out of his bed, whacked his head on the bunk above him, and rubbed the welt that was forming as he shook himself out of sleep. Argh, I overslept.

He looked around and saw to his dismay that everyone was already up; even Gonzo who was a heavy sleeper. The little pirate frowned and he timidly made his way to the door that led outside. He took a deep breath. Okay Niko. Just go out cool and casual and hope evil, purple, vertically challenged Captain doesn't notice. Cool and casual. Cool and casual.

He repeated these words when he opened the door and walked out with an overly self-conscious gait that made him more conspicuous. His eyes darted from side to side to see if anyone realized he had slept in.

No one noticed, or they didn't seem to care. The captain was looking out to sea with a rolled up map clenched tightly in his hands, and the crew were minding their own business. Niko relaxed and exhaled as he saw that he was going to get away with oversleeping. He took everyone's eerie silence as the result of another night at the bar.

The pirate smiled and gave his cheeriest laugh. "Morning everyo – mmmmffff!"

"Shhhh!" Link clapped a hand over Niko's mouth. Link stared at Vaati to see if there was any reaction before he quickly pulled the startled pirate indoors and closed the door shut.

"What was that for, swabbie?" Niko gasped.

"He's upset. Very, very upset."

"You mean evil, purple, vertically challenged Captain?"

Link's eyes darted to the door, half-expecting Vaati to appear. Niko's runaway mouth was going to get him killed someday. "Yeah. We got a map last night…but there was a slight problem."

"What's special about it, swabbie?"

"We think it'll lead us to Hyrule."

Niko perked up. "We're going to Hyrule? The Hyrule? The great kingdom from legends?"

Link nodded. "Yes. But here's the trouble; no one can read the map."

Niko's eyes drooped down in disappointment. "Well that sucks."

"It more than sucks, Niko. Did you notice how everyone kept at least a ten-foot radius of empty space around the captain? Provoke him now and you'd be lucky to get away in one piece."

Niko tried to stay optimistic. "If I lose an eye, I'll just wear one of those eye patches real pirates wear."

"…Niko, just try not to provoke the captain. If you want an eye patch you can still wear one without getting your eye poked out."

They felt the room's temperature go down a few degrees as the door slammed open and Vaati appeared.

"Um, morning captain," Niko squeaked. He hid behind Link, as the hero was the only person who could stand up to Vaati and get away with it.

"Good morning." The mage didn't sound happy. "Being lazy on my ship, are we?"

"Vaati, I was just explaining to Niko about the map."

Vaati sneered. "Then you know why we haven't set sail yet. I'm going to make you do something useful for once…pirate."

Niko couldn't move his eyes away from the glaring red orbs that had pinned him in place. "Th-thank you captain."

"Go and find a way to make the map understandable. If you succeed, I will forgive you for oversleeping."

Darn it! So he had noticed. "I'll try, captain."

Vaati's smile was puking fake. "I know you'll try very hard. What with your enthusiasm I'm sure you'll succeed." The mage's cape whirled around as he turned back and went out the door. Niko stood open mouthed in panic and shock.

Link was still tense. "Sorry I couldn't help you out there, Niko. Vaati had that creepy look again and I wasn't sure if my butting in would have made it better or worse for you."

"Swabbie, I think the captain is insane. You can't stop a madman."

"Maybe crazy. But I think it's more because the stress of everything is finally getting to him," Link said.

"Stress?! I'm the one who should be stressed, swabbie!"

"He lost his magic, was forced to travel with the person he hated most, went under loads of humiliation, had Ganondorf escape him with the one person who could fix everything, found Hyrule under an ocean, lost his favorite pet, and is currently unable to read the only good lead left. I'd be stressed."

"Swabbie, I don't get why you even try defending him."

"Don't worry. I'm just trying to find good reasons to justify his sour behavior so I can convince myself that bringing him along wasn't a dumb idea."

"……That was a dumb idea, no offence."

Link watched Niko staring at his boots with worry. "Link, what am I going to do?"

The blond boy sighed. "I don't know. I'll try to talk Vaati into going easy on you. You should try to do something about the map meanwhile." He caught Niko's eyes on him in surprise. "It's all right. I don't think he can hurt me."

"Thanks," the little pirate mumbled appreciatively. Link pat the miserable Niko's shoulders to try to cheer him up.

XXXXXXXX

Later, the Hero of Time found himself in the ocean; trying to reason with Vaati had not gone well.

The jerk, Link thought as he swam to shore. As soon as he had mentioned "Niko" and "map" to Vaati the mage had sent a whirlwind that shoved him off the side of the ship.

If you're so worried about the buck-toothed fool, go help him, the irate sorcerer had said.

Still drenched, Link went off to search for Niko to see how he was doing in finding someone who could help them read the map. He was a little disappointed when he found the pirate sitting on the docks feeding the fish.

"Hey, Niko? Vaati sent me over to help you."

Niko threw some bait into the water and watched the fish dart around the surface. "He threw you off the ship, didn't he swabbie." The question came out as a statement.

"He did."

"That means you couldn't talk him out of it."

"And that's exactly why we should try to do something about the map," Link urged. Niko continued to throw bait.

"I talked to everybody in town, swabbie! EVERYBODY. I know people here so when I say everybody I mean EVERYBODY. I even talked to the old ladies," this time, the pirate chucked a piece of bait as far as he could. "No one knows a thing about reading weird maps."

"Did you try the person who runs the auction house? He was the one who had it."

"You mean Sir Eskimo? Zunari probably put it for sale because he couldn't read it himself. And yeah, I talked to him." Niko stood up as he ran out of bait, causing the fish to dart away. He smiled weakly. "I guess I should report to the captain and take everything in stride. Swabbie, I'm counting on you to find me an eye patch later."

"Hoy! Hold it, small fry!"

Link and Niko looked around to see who had called them. They didn't see anybody.

"Down here! Geez, are you two blind or what," a fish (?) was talking to them. "I couldn't help but overhear you. Seriously, you didn't get EVERYBODY small fry."

"Swabbie, what is that thing?" Niko whispered to Link.

Link shook his head. "I have no idea."

It looked like a fish, but the head looked a bit human. Well, not really. Link didn't know how to describe it except it was something just below the Oocca on the weirdness tier.

"If you're looking for someone who knows about maps, well, let's say I know such a person," the queer fish continued.

"Really?" the pirate was suddenly interested. "Can you tell me who?"

"Ah. Lemme think. But whoa there! You're that green fry who was with the Kingly Red Lion guy and who wiped the floor with ol' Ganon a while ago! Sure, sure, I'll help you fries, especially since you gave me all that food for free!" the fish exclaimed. Link involuntarily took a step back from the watery fish eyes that were staring at him now. Niko was also bothered by the creature's appearance, but he was more than eager to save his eye so he listened.

"Follow this carefully, all right small fry? I'm only going to say it once. ONCE. So pick your ears free of earwax and LISTEN UP.
There's an island just south west of here. I heard this rumor about a crazy guy who pretends he's a fairy. Yeah, ain't that just whacked? Check it out, and bring a bunch of rupees. He's crazy, but he knows stuff about maps. Get it?"

Niko and Link exchanged glances. "Um…I guess we should let Vaati know," Link blinked. Niko nodded hurriedly and ran back to the boat leaving Link behind with the fish.

"Yeah, you're welcome small fry! Don't mention it! You really don't need to thank me so much because you're making me embarrassed!" the fish griped and began to blow bubbles in the water. The boy in green tried to appear apologetic.

"Uh, thank you. We appreciate it."

"Yeah yeah, whatever, small fry. I'm always so underappreciated. Such is the life of a fish…" there was a splash of water as the fish sped away.

Link turned around and made his way back to the ship, somewhat disturbed by the fish's description of the man they were going to have to meet. He sounded vaguely familiar, but there was no way someone from the past could have survived this long into the future. Not someone normal, in any case. But…

A crazy guy who pretends he's a fairy and likes rupees. Link vehemently shook his head. No way, it has to be someone else.

OXXXXXXXO

Diablo1123: Link - The auction was ok, I guess. I was asleep for most of it.

Vaati - Interesting, yes. Especially the expressions of the fools I forced to spend more money. However, I must say it was ridiculously boring.

Peka the Corsair: Vaati - I have a firm policy of being respectable to women. I'm not a monster after all.

Link - Respectable? You mean like forcefully kidnapping them, turning them to stone, sealing them inside dungeons, etc., etc.?

Vaati - Shush. That's irrelevant.

H-bomber: Vaati - Why, thank you. You can't be stupid if you want to mastermind plans.

Link - You'd have to be stupid if you keep messing up on the same plan time after time after time.

Vaati - Boy, you are stupid for irking me this far.

Reily96: Vaati - He does. I've been stuck with him for goddess knows how long and he's never appeared more intelligent than a Like-like. I'm ashamed I've let him beat me.

Link - It's all right. I never listen to him anyway. He's more like background noise. But NO, nonono, you don't know what you're asking.

Vaati - Quiet, boy. She was asking me a question, not you. Let me think...

Link - No. Just...no.

Vaati - I might have to check to see if that number's already taken.

Link - ...I hope you were joking Vaati.

Yuudai Arai: Vaati - Ha, Link, being evil pays off.

Link -At least I've never had to die three times...

Rune Caster: Vaati - Leaf? I prefer something with more elegance. The Wind Waker also has powerful benefits.

Link - I was also hoping you'd take the leaf. At least with a leaf you'd have more trouble getting people to take you seriously.

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