Appologies for the delay. I've just started uni and freshers week has taken up the majority of my time. Please review x
Left or Right?
Chapter 8 – In The Arms Of An Angel
Jack took off his suit jacket and hung it over the back of his chair. He thought that coming and doing some work might take his mind of the day's events. He sat down in the chair and turned the computer screen on to check his emails.
He rubbed his eyes trying to focus on the screen but his mind kept on wandering and he couldn't make any sense of it. He couldn't make any sense out of anything at the moment.
Eventually he gave up and turned the computer back off. He stood and looked out of the window at the morning traffic passing the station.
He rubbed his eyes again, he didn't think he could stand sitting through another colleagues funeral, especially not Mickey's funeral.
Eventually it was time and he joined his grieving officers in the yard. Uniform where dressed smartly in their uniforms, white gloves on their hands. CID were dressed in black suits and white shirts, the men all wearing black ties.
They travelled to the church in silence, the same church as Mickey's Mum's funeral had been held at five years before. Mickey was to be buried beside his Mum, together again.
As Jack got out of his car he could see Chris and his family stood talking to the vicar. He wanted to go and speak to him but couldn't make his legs move in that direction. His whole body felt like the strength of gravity had doubled, he didn't have the energy to move.
Jack could almost feel Chris' grief from where he was stood frozen to the spot. It was being emitted in constant waves of pain and guilt, he could see it in his stance, the way he held his head, gestured with his hands. He might just as well be screaming it.
Jack had to look away, it was too painful watching Mickey's brother who was so alike him that Mickey could have risen from the dead and be stood a few feet before him.
He turned and caught sight of Kezia stood nearby. He knew that she had taken it particularly hard, they had worked closely many times and she felt like she was to blame, she should have prevented the assault, made him go to hospital. Jack knew that he should talk to her about it, normally he would have, his officers health and sanity was very important to him but he was so wrapped up his own grief that even saying Mickey's name had become almost impossible.
Jo moved towards Kezia and slipped an arm around the young officer. She felt an element of guilt as well, she had noticed his sudden, inexplicable personality change, she should have known it was a symptom of a head injury.
But Jack alone felt the greatest guilt. He was Mickey's DCI, Hell, he was Mickey's friend, he should have taken care of him, ensured he came to no harm, but like so many times before he had let Mickey down and this time Mickey had paid the ultimate price. It should have been him being buried today not Mickey, who had his whole life ahead of him. Jack thought of Mickey almost as a son and parents should always outlive their children. That was natural, that was right, the way it should be.
The officers from Sun Hill proceeded as one into the church, tragedy always brought them together, during difficult times they needed to be able to trust each other. Jack sat down directly behind Chris and his family. He'd had a chance to get a closer look at his children as they had come into the church. The boy looked about seven and the girl four, both had their uncles fair hair.
The vicar stood before his silent audience, he began talking but Jack didn't, couldn't, hear a word he said. In his mind he could see Mickey sat at his desk, the team arguing about a case, just a normal day. That was how he preferred to remember Mickey, lively, caring, a good officer. He couldn't stand the image of Mickey's dead, lifeless face. Couldn't think of him as a body, lying in a hospital morgue.
A movement in front of him brought him round from his daydream. Chris had stood up and was moving towards the front.
"When Mickey an' I were children we were inseparable, always looking out for each other. At school I used to beat up any kids that picked on him an' he used to get me out of trouble with his quick mind. He was the best little brother in the world, he'd convince you the sky was green if it'd help me, he knew the estate we lived on better than anyone an' always had somewhere for us to hide when I'd done something to annoy the other kids. No matter what he was always there for me. In return I used to stick up for him when our Dad had a go.
But even when he was young he always stood up for what he believed in, our Mum always taught us right from wrong but for Mickey it was black an' white. There was no in between, you were either good or bad. He always stuck up for the little kid at school, and he hated crime. It was no surprise that he joined the police when he was eigh'een.
But the night before he left home, me an' him had a fight. It was stupid an' even at the time I knew 'e was right cos 'e was always right, but I was angry an' we never made it up. It's the biggest regret of my life that we never sorted it out. After out Mum was killed, I wanted to but we were grieving an' I kept thinkin' I'll call him tomorrow an' we'll be fine but I never did an' all of a sudden it was five years later an' I'm getting a phone call sayin' he was dead. I never got the chance to say sorry an' tell him how much I loved him, an' now it's too late, I never will. All because of one stupid argument.
I'll never forget my brother, I never could. I see his face every morning in my son. I see his smile on my daughters lips every time she laughs an' I know that he'll live on as long as they live.
Everyone here knew Mickey, knew how much he cared, knew that he was a good police officer and a good person. And I hope you'll never forget 'im. I never will." He choked and wiping the tears from his eyes with the back of his hand he sat back down beside his wife.