Chapter 4: Dungeon Weirdness
"Man," Argon commented, looking the man up and down, "You are one short dude. Haven't been drinking your milk there?" The newcomer, who had indiscreetly introduced himself in the third person as Yoshimo, grinned back.
"Yes, I seem to be finding myself among those that are far taller and more imposing than myself. For that reason, seeing as how you are so very large, I ask for you aid."
"Alright little man, what help do you want exactly? And I suggest that you speak quickly, as it will determine your lifespan. I'm in a rather angry mood right now, and all I want to do is get out of this stench-ridden dungeon, and find the son of a bitch who brought me here." Despite the promise or perhaps threat of death, Yoshimo never batted an eye.
"Of course. You see kind sir, I myself am, or rather was, a prisoner in this place. I am unsure how I came to be here…like you, I suspect. It has been a trying ordeal to find a way out, but alas, my efforts are not going as well as they could, I being wounded in my attempt. I have been trapped in this room, and was unable to use the portal from which you have come. And by what you have said, you too are seeking the way out, so the portal must not be it. I was hopeful that we could join together, and search for an exit from this unsavory place. Two, after all, are mightier than one."
Argon thought on this. He really didn't think he would need anyone's help in getting out. He had already used the portal, and gained access to the upper level, so, the exit couldn't be too far off. Besides, he had long grown weary of traveling companions.
"Now why should I believe that? I was locked down there in a magical cell, and I only got out through sheer cunning. How did a small fry like you get out? I don't think the wizard in charge of this place is so sloppy as to let prisoners escape so easily." Even as he was speaking, Argon was already resolved to kill this man. It was really nothing personal, and in another time and place, he may have liked his company. But he was a murderer, and he didn't want to let himself fall out of his own reputation. However, what the man said in response, got him to hold back.
"Yes," he agreed, "I suppose that does warrant an explanation, if we are to have trust. My name is Yoshimo as I have said, and I am by trade a…sneaksmen shall we say? Among other things of course. I have gotten quite use to picking locks, and disarming cunning traps, meant to foil normal prisoners. I can assure you, it was no small task to break free, and I had to run from a persistent golem guarding me when I did. And despite my best efforts, this place is unwilling to submit, and let me leave unhindered, as I arrived in the room beyond this one, and these numerous crackling…fiends attacked me. And for each one I killed, another appeared to take its place. Eventually, I had to run into here, and lock the door. And without knowledge on how to use the portal, I was trapped."
Argon listened, all the while examining the mans face and words. It wasn't like he was worried about this man being a spy. He didn't care one way or the other. But if he was on the level, Argon wasn't going to object to a thief. Thieves could get information, they could acquire things that most could not acquire, and they weren't notorious for being moral. Perhaps in this rare exception, alive was better than dead.
"Humph. I suppose if you want to follow behind me, feel free. But before we go, I want to know…why are you down here? The wizard wants something from me. What about you? What is your purpose here?" At this, Yoshimo's face grew a tint red, and with a clearing of his throat, half-turned away.
"It is actually quite uh…embarrassing. My profession does not leave itself open to those that are not wary, yet somehow I was caught unaware. I came to Athkatla years ago from Kara-Tur, to seek my fortune. At some point, I went to bed in my room at the Copper Coronet and I awoke in a strange room with a very sore head. I do not know how long I was out, so there is no telling whether we are still in Athkatla, or somewhere else entirely. And as for the reason I am here, I cannot say. Perhaps this wizard captor of ours needed subjects for a vile experiment, and thought that I may do rather nicely."
"Amn," Argon commented, thinking back. Sarevok wanted to start that war with Amn. So, I guess it wouldn't surprise me that I'm there now. Snapping back to the now, he rolled his shoulders, and stepped past Yoshimo.
"Alright, I've stood here long enough. I'm going on. If you're coming, just don't get in my way, else you'll lose your head. Got me?" Yoshimo nodded and bowed low, an odd gesture to say the least.
"I am honored to join you. Though, would it not be wiser to fight together? There are quite a few of those monsters beyond the door." This man's caution did nothing but make Argon grin.
"I'm not the type of person that does well with teamwork," he answered, "and in a minute, I think you'll understand why." With no warning, Argon charged forward in a wild stampede, bearing down on the small wooden door, the only visible exit from the room. It seemed to shudder at the approach of the human battering ram, rushing towards it.
Upon impact, it shattered to nothing, almost being vaporized as the mountain of a man barreled through it, leaving a clearly bewildered Yoshimo in the pervious room. Just as he had been told, there were numerous little creatures inhabiting the room; mephits, imps, quasits, and little bastard monsters like them.
Knats, Argon mentally ranking them on a scale of precisely how bothersome they were to him. His sword wasn't even that necessary. He used his heavy fists and boots, to crush their frail bodies, their corpse falling to the stone floor. And just like Yoshimo had warned, when one fell, another appeared to fight in its stead. This was because of these…portals, a cage housing a master creature, with the ability to warp in more.
"Crush the leader, and the flies die with it." Argon stepped through the horde, easily three dozen of them clawing at him, trying to inflict harm. No such luck. He carefreely strode to one portal, reached through the bars, and smashed its head, no doubt liquefying its brain to paste. At once, maybe eight mephits fell to the floor, just upped and died. This followed by the second portal, the third and the fourth. With each one down, a good fraction of the group fell, and soon none was left standing.
The assault complete, Argon began scanning the room. Nothing but junk, old furniture, some chests here and there, and two doors out. Back from the other room, the one with the portal, almost like a frightened mouse, Yoshimo poked his head into the room, peering about. On the floor were the carcasses of the seemingly endless supply of monsters, the fearsome giant of a man towering over their wretched remains.
Such strength, Yoshimo commented, to do this single handedly, with no wounds to speak of afterwards…takes great power. I must be cautious with him; else my head may indeed roll. Contrary to his own vigilant thoughts, he planted a warm smile on, and stepped into the room, gazing around.
"I see why you are capable of taking care of yourself. A most impressive display my friend. Perhaps I may yet see the sun again, if I am under your protection."
"Protection," Argon snorted, "I do not protect you or anyone. You're in my wake, nothing more." This did surprisingly little to faze Yoshimo.
"Then, it is better to be the right hand of destruction, than in its path. So, which way do we go from here?" There were two doors leading to somewhere, and Argon was never good with guessing. He chose the closest one. Yoshimo followed, nimbly hopping around the mass of corpses. After a short hallway, there came a strange sight. It was a dead-end, the room being filled with more of the ever familiar glass tanks. Within these, were beings much more recognizable than in the previous rooms.
They were several bodies of women. The same woman by the looks, a breathtaking elven maiden. There were a few with the whole body, while others only had pieces, arms and legs, a torso or just a head. Rather frightening. And one jar was broken; one of the women was up and out, and in the midst of fighting another person. This man was garbed in black, a hood drawn over his face. Though the woman looked disoriented and clumsy, she was still quick and agile enough to slice open the neck to the thug battling her with a dagger in her delicate hands. When he fell, she noticed the daunting figure in the shadows.
"Ah, thou hast come once again to prey upon me, my Master!!" Argon glanced behind at Yoshimo, who merely shrugged, having a puzzled expression himself. Argon didn't strike at once, as he had a tendency to do. This clone, as that must have been what it was, this clone of a woman, she was quite the looker, and Argon's taste. He wasn't picky, but she seemed to appeal to him. The softness of elven flesh always tickled his fancy, a rare delight that he had experienced a couple of times in the past.
"That depends on who this master is," he answered back, stepping into the light, "But the question is, exactly who are you, who is made in the striking image of someone else? That, and where might I find the original?" This innuendo banter only served to agitate the clone.
She pointed a wild finger back at him, and shrieked, "Thou knowest who I am, foul one! Or dost thou now mistake me for HER?! You created me, fool! And killed and created and killed and created! And now, I shall put an end to thee!" Following this, with a frenzied yell, she leapt towards him, blade out in front, ready to stab.
Argon didn't move. He could have let her stab him, it wouldn't have bothered him, but he wanted her alive. At least until she got close. He grabbed her wrist, and yanked her in. At a distance, she had been attractive, but at close range, he could see that she was unfinished as a clone, having flaws in her skin, her features. It would be rather terrible to try and rape her now, like doing it with a half-dead person.
"Pity," he said aloud, before reaching around, and snapping the clone's neck with his hand. She went limp at once, and he casually tossed her limp body back in the room. Seeing no exits, he turned and walked right back out, as if nothing had happened. Yoshimo had a most peculiar look as he watched this massive human brush past him. Suddenly, he was getting a rather bad feeling, arriving at a conclusion that this man might kill him just for the fun of it. But for the moment, he stayed quiet, and followed, eager to leave.
The other door led to a much longer hallway, where several more men wearing black uniforms were battling creatures, goblins and mephits. Argon walked through the crowd, cutting man and beast down indiscriminately, just to get through. By the time he did, nearly three-fourths of everything was killed, the rest wounded. Beyond this was a chamber with stone pedestals to one side, each with a wand embedded in it. As Argon passed in front of one, magical balls of energy leapt out of the wand, and struck him. It did nothing.
He did pause though, walk over, and slam his fist into the statue. It broke apart, the apparatus coming undone. He went on to the next, smashed that, and the one after that, until all six where nothing more than fragments of stone and magical scraps.
"Pretty lousy defense," he muttered. Once that was done, he saw that he had quite a few choices when it came to ways to go. On one side of the chamber, there were three different hallways, leading to who knows what. On the other side, there was but one single door. Again, not good with guessing, Argon chose the lone door.
It turned out to be incorrect. Inside, a little ways down, were four people. Two of them were wearing the same black uniforms as the other nameless peons prior, and another, a woman this one, who was wearing the telltale robes of a mage. These three were facing off against the last occupant. A pale hunched creature, with dark lifeless eyes, fluid black hair, and overly pronounced canines. It reeked of undead, and it didn't exactly take three guesses to know which one. Vampire.
"Ah excellent" the abomination hissed at the three assassins, eyeing them with pitiless joy, "I see I am provided with fresh blood for once."
"Where is your master fiend," the mage demanded, ignoring the previous sickening remark, "We seek Irenicus! Give us the upstart, and you shall survive." Even Argon could see that these people had no chance of dealing with a vampire. They may have had their weaknesses, but they were unnaturally faster and stronger than any normal person, and they could drain away your life-force with but a touch.
"Already I am dead thief," it answered, edging forward, opening wide it's mouth, "Join me in darkness…"
"Enough! Kill this creature and raze the guild! Irenicus shall learn what of what it is to betray the Shadow Thieves!" The three attacked. Argon only watched, waiting. He would fight the victor. Yoshimo crept up, watching.
"Perhaps it would be wise to use this confusion to slip back the way we have come. We don't wish to draw any undesirable attention to ourselves." Argon shrugged.
"Go then…I'm waiting to kill the vampire." Yoshimo looked as if he did indeed wish to leave, but in a place that possibly had more blood-suckers lurking around, he felt safest at the side of the fearless behemoth. The vampire killed the two fighters as simply as a cat catches mice, snapping their necks, and tossing their limp carcasses aside. The mage was next, as she had finished creating a sword of fire to fight with, her head was yanked back, and her throat was all but torn out, due to the almost straining teeth of the thirsty monster. Her blood went everywhere, splashing onto the floor in great puddles, and much going all over the creature itself, much to its delight. Then, it saw the Bhaalspawn.
"More," it murmured, rising up from its kill, "More blood to feed on," In a blur of motion, it came flying forward, hands out, ready to grasp, and teeth parted, ready to bite. It never did either. Its inhuman speed was all for naught. Compared to Argon, it may as well have charged him with anchors attached to its legs. He crouched down, and sent an enormous fist out, colliding with its chest. The force of his godlike strength tore right through the vampire's much more fragile torso, as it went right in, and right back out again.
What's more, Argon's hand had gone in empty, but came out full, with a blackened chunk of flesh, that was pulsating. It's corrupted and corroded heart.
"No heart," he told the rapidly dying thing, "No blood." With a quick clench, the organ exploded in his hand, sending its vile blackened ooze coursing over his palm and squeezing through his fingers, like toxic jelly. Once it had died…again, Argon shoved the thing back off, and wiped his hand on the stone wall. Then, he left. Yoshimo watched all of this, flabbergasted. What he had seen was inhuman. Suddenly there was something he wanted to know.
"Pardon my asking," he apologized, "But I don't even think I ever got your name. Might I trouble you for it?" Argon wasn't in the habit of telling people who exactly he was, as they tended to either run or try and kill him, but these days, he didn't care much anymore.
"It's Argon." Yoshimo made a noticeable jump.
"Again, pardon my prying, but might you be the…" He was cut off with a somewhat threatening hand gesture.
"Yes yes, the guy who saved Baldur's Gate, and all that shit. That's me. That, and yes, I'm also known as Argon the Terrible. And before you even ask…I am just as terrible as everyone says. I think you've seen enough of that to justify it. And I think you should be very happy, as normally, you would have been dead only moments after meeting me. Consider it your good graces that you are alive at all. That, and you are a thief. When we get out, I may have use for you."
"Use for me? What use would one such as yourself have for someone like me? I am but a modest thief, trying to get by in the world."
"True enough, but I know that in Amn, if that's where we still are, thieves aren't usually freelancers. You report to someone higher up the ladder, and can make some introductions. And you heard those goons. The Shadow Thieves? What does that mean I wonder? Perhaps they have some insight to my capture. Information is their greatest strength. Besides, I would think that you would jump at the opportunity to help. After all, I seem to recall you yourself saying that it is better to be the right hand of destruction, rather than in its path. Right?"
Yoshimo, worried now about his wellbeing, knew that saying otherwise meant instant death. Not wanting that, and knowing that having a possible ally as strong and fierce as this inhuman savage, could be very beneficial.
"Indeed you are correct. I am humbly at your service."
"Good. Now, stop your yapping, and get walking." Following orders, Yoshimo shut his trap, and took up his position behind the giant. Argon picked another hallway, this one leading to what looked like a sewer system. What's more, it smelled like a sewer system. Standing on a catwalk, suspended over god-awful filth, were four men, casually waiting, each wearing the same black outfits as those before. When one saw and heard the approach of the two, he looked round, and stood up straighter. He pointed at them, and gave a short hyena laugh.
"Ahah! I knew there had to be reinforcements down here. Couldn't be that powerful by himself, I said!"
"As if anyone would ever care what an idiot like you would say," Argon shot back, "I suggest you start running, as in five seconds, I'm going to rip your guts out." This threat, though ominous and terrifying, didn't seem to bother the men. Perhaps they were too stupid to figure it out?
"Oh, you will, will you? Ha, I doubt that! I'll just put an' end to this here and now. We'll see the end of Irenicus and your little guild before this day is through!" But just as Argon had warned, he dashed forward, before the thief had finished bantering, and had sliced open the stomach of one of his counterparts, his now ablaze guts came spilling out, as he fell into them. The second had a deep burning gash swept diagonally across his chest; the third had his legs cut out from under him, and his neck snapped.
The last one, the boastful and mouthy one, was sliced into little pieces. And then, Argon walked past their remains, continuing his search. This show of intense and stomach-turning brutality was almost more than Yoshimo could take. He had seen his share of murder in his life, but this was just borderline of hellish. Still, he wasn't doubting that there wasn't a thing they may encounter there that would be able to halt their progress of escape, so he counted his blessings, few though they were.
Finally, after following a few more sewer tunnels, there was a steep incline, and at the end of a far away passage, was the flicker of light. True light, not that of a torch. The sun blazing brightly outside.
"Aha!" Yoshimo cried out, pointing in triumph, "We have found the exit. Well done my friend, your ability to navigate is most commendable."
"Don't celebrate just yet. Listen and look." He was indeed right. Things weren't over yet. For lying along the floor to the path reaching the surface, where numerous corpses, dozens of bodies, scarred and deformed with perverted magic. And from outside, there came the rumble of explosions, clashing of metal, and the yelling of enraged voices.
"Sounds like the wizard is in the middle of something up there. Maybe we should pop out and say hi?" Yoshimo didn't answer, but looked ready, though fearful at the same time. With no intentions of going back, the two started upward, making the trek back into the daylight, and into the sight of Irenicus.