Well, I was gonna sit and wait things out a bit...See if anybody actually got desperate enough to POST THEIR OWN AxM fic...

(ZOMGS!SUBLIMINMESSAGING!!GNIGASSEMNIMILBUS!ZGMOZ!)

...Unfortunately, it didn't happen. But it SHOULD! (stands threateningly with an uzi and a lightsaber) Shouldn't it?

I own nothing...

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Better Off

To be honest, Artha missed her a little. The playful elbow to the ribs, the soft touches when no one was looking, and the extreme competitiveness that topped it all off. She was slender and beautiful, and her emerald eyes could light up a room. Hell, one could even argue that Artha missed the smell of her hair.

Artha mused that falling in love with Kitt Wann was potentially the best thing that had ever happened to Artha in the sixteen years he had lived.

Some people didn't believe it (Pyrrah, for one, screamed her denial to the heavens). Some were baffled by it (Phistus had blinked and asked "Weren't they dating already?"). A few made the announcement public (Vociferous had broadcasted it all through town, just to piss them off). Several teased them (Wulf and his random crewmate made various hand gestured to each other and laughed). Others...Just didn't care (Khatah walked away before he was even told).

They were happy, they were healthy, and, worst of all, they were competitive. Always competing to beat each other in something. This is possibly why they didn't date for more than a month. Kitt muttered the dreaded "Let's just be friends" line and that was that.

A week later at his seventeenth birthday party, which both Kitt and Pyrrah were mysteriously absent from, Artha was sulking. Sulking and drinking, as it would be. Kitt had left him, and he was pissed. So like a stupid little boy, he thought some hard liquor could make his life easier for a while.

Now this is the point of the story where I, the author(ess) tell you that alcohol is bad for you. It will kill your liver and brain. It will deform your babies. It will also make you throw up. However, as long as I get your reviews, I don't really care how you choose to screw up your life. I shall continue now.

So when Artha woke up in a run-down shack in Old City with a spring getting dangerously close to raping his bum, he decided that it was rather foolish of him to get drunk. With this comforting thought in mind, Artha avoided the spring and snuggled up against the warm body next to him and went back to sleep.

Or he tried.

Realization that there was indeed a warm body next to him snapped Artha out of his drunken stupor faster than...Something really fast. Warily, Artha glanced over to his left to see...Moordryd Paynn? Speaking of pain...Artha shifted slightly, and regretted it severely. His subconscious snickered at him and muttered something about "being on bottom" before Artha squashed it like a small insect. His subconscious then went on to squeal its death throes and hiss at the too-close-for-comfort bedspring.

Still doubting the situation, Artha prodded Moordryd's shoulder. His pale shoulder...His pale, sexy shoulder...His pale, sexy...In response, Moordryd rolled on to his side and pulled Artha into an embrace. The next few words whispered into Artha's ear by the white-haired teen made Artha blush several shades of red.

The beat-faced teen took a moment to review the facts as his bedmate propped himself up on his elbows and smirked.

One: He had gotten drunk last night

Two: He had woken up naked in a bed somewhere unfamiliar

Three: His arch-nemesis was in bed with him, naked as well

Four: That mattress spring was still trying to rape him

Five: Moordryd was doing something amazing with his tongue

Artha mused that waking up in bed with Moordryd Paynn was potentially the best thing that had ever happened to him in the seventeen years that he had lived.

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Fin.

Yeah...People are probably going "ZOMGZWTFBBQ!?!?!1111!!11one!!eleven!!!11!" right now.

Truth is, I used to be a fan of ArthaxKitt. Then, I saw "Pride of the Hero" and the homosexual side of my brain shot the heterosexual side of my brain with tranquilizers...Manny, many, many tranquilizers.

I was checking out a lot of other girls that week...

So, it was supposed to be all dramatic and stuff at the start. But I typed it while reading VG Cats (shameless plug). So, naturally, my warped sense of humor reared it's deformed head.

As for the Not-So-Public-Service-Announcement? Yeah. You people probably hate me for not updating in forever and I hate you for not taking some initiative and writing something yourself.

So review already and I might like you.

P.S. PyrrahxKitt? I must be on drugs.