My apologies for taking so long. I hope to post the next chapter this weekend...

Warning: Bill's still being stubborn, but not for much longer. I apologise for the brief segue into Cottle's past...it was hard to resist. Hmmm...Make that impossible to resist...but I did try to keep it brief and to the point...

Thanks again for still being here to read, and for those who comment - thank you for the happy thoughts. I hope this entertains.

Disclaimer...hasn't changed. Not likely to.

Too High a Cost
By: Mariel

-xxxxxxxxxx-

Chapter 17

Review

After Sharon's visit, Laura eventually succeeded in falling into a short, troubled nap. When she awoke, the rest of her day followed much the same routine all her days had since her arrival in Life Station: she'd read the reports left for her by Tory, then had dinner; Tory had come in after that for the day's recap, and then she'd had visitors. Tonight, Kara and Tigh had dropped in.

The day couldn't be complete, however, without one last appearance from Cottle.

It wasn't something she had been looking forward to.

He walked in about an hour after evening visiting hours were over. Much to Laura's surprise, he appeared to have little to say. First, he examined Bill's chart. He frowned, but made no comment. Then he took a few steps to the foot of Laura's bed and picked up the clipboard that hung from the foot rail. Reading it quickly, he said, "You're doing just fine." Finally looking directly at her, he asked, "You making sure you get up and walk around every couple of hours?"

Laura nodded. Cottle said nothing more. Replacing the clipboard, he moved towards the door.

Having no idea that from the moment he'd arrived, the man had been putting a superhuman effort into biting his tongue, Laura watched him with a certain amount of astonishment. He hadn't said a thing out of the ordinary. No pithy innuendo, no ribald remark, not one caustic comment.

There hadn't been a single smirk or knowing glance.

What the hell was wrong with him?

She sat in stunned silence as he stopped before opening the door to leave. His hand still on the door knob, he hesitated and then turned. Obviously debating something with himself, he finally said in a gruff tone, "You won't be disturbed again tonight. I'm going to tell the night staff to skip the twelve o'clock check and to leave you alone. You're doing fine, and they can keep an eye on the Admiral's monitors from the head desk without coming in here."

Laura just stared at him.

With a hint of impatience, he waved a hand in the direction of the Admiral and explained, "That's my subtle hint you can indulge in whatever sleeping arrangement you want. None of my staff will be in to bother you until morning."

Roslin coloured. She teetered between total embarrassment and anger over the man's temerity. How dare he make assumptions? How dare he even allude to what he'd walked in on this morning? How dare-

Abruptly, she rolled over onto her side. Flipping her blanket up over her shoulder, she ground out a curt, "Good night, Doctor."

Raising an eyebrow at her frosty tone, he snorted. "You're welcome, I'm sure - and good night to you, too." Shaking his head, he opened the room's door. Gods, the woman was irritating. Who was she trying to fool? He knew damned well where she'd end up before the night was out. Glancing back before stepping out into the hallway, he half wished he'd said all the things he'd wanted to say but hadn't because he was (and gods knew why) trying to act with a little restraint.

He shuddered. Restraint. He must have been out of his frakking mind.

That thought brought him to a sudden halt, because he was very afraid there was an element of truth to his being out of his mind. He preferred things straight, clean and simple, and this whole business with Adama and Roslin had him going a little crazy. He didn't like how torn he felt about it - on one hand wanting to keep her as far away from Adama as possible, but on the other, wanting Bill to have the comfort of her presence if that's what he needed. His feelings should have been much more straightforward: she was either good for Bill or bad for him, case closed.

The corners of his mouth curved downward. It wasn't that easy, though. Firmly closing the door behind him, he admitted she was probably more bad for him than good, but no matter how hard he tried to push it away, a small, stubborn part of him knew there were things about her that would attract the Admiral mightily. She was smart and challenging and beautiful.

And ornery as a mule.

Bill, godsdamn him, would trip all over himself falling for something like that. He'd also seen them together; seen them go through her cancer and near death and watched them as she'd recovered. And, he grudgingly admitted, there were things about her, perhaps, that might have had an outside chance of maybe even being good for him...There certainly had been times Bill had looked almost happy...

Frak it, you old coot! he thought. You're grasping at straws, here. Meyes is rubbing off on you.

He grimaced. That would certainly explain his hope that Roslin hopped into bed with Bill as soon as the door closed. But hell, sentimental drivel or not, if the warmth of being next to another human being drew Bill back from wherever it was he'd taken himself, it was all to the good. Clenching his jaw, he decided that if Roslin's presence managed to do that, he didn't care about what degree of bad she was for him - he'd figure out how to keep her away once Adama regained consciousness.

Chiding himself, he reached for a cigarette. Just listen to me, he thought. Meyes would laugh her fool head off if she could read my mind right now...

-xxx-

Laura heard Cottle leave and stubbornly closed her eyes. No way would she leave her bed for Bill's tonight. How dare Cottle suggest that-

She clamped down on her anger and, lifting her head, she punched her pillow in frustration a couple of times. Gods. Even when Cottle said barely anything he was infuriating. Flopping her head back down on it, she tried to force herself to relax into sleep.

She schooled her breathing, forcing it to slow and even out. She centred her thoughts, envisioned peaceful scenes and imagined soft strains of soulful music. She forced her muscles to relax...

And listened as the night sounds surrounding her grew in significance. Footsteps in the hallway echoed; muted voices grew in volume; the hum of the air filtration unit made her nerves vibrate...

But most of all, she became focussed on Bill's breathing. It sounded gentle, restful...and slow. She felt herself begin to tense. Unsettled in a way she couldn't fathom, she made a disgusted sound and rose. Walking over to his bedside, she stopped. This time, there was no hesitation. Lifting the covers, she slipped into bed beside him.

In her mind, she could hear Cottle's derisive chuckle.

Frak him.

Bill felt warm and familiar, and she exhaled softly. Placing a slender thigh over his leg, she pressed herself against him and ran her palm over his chest. Moving her cheek against his shoulder, she closed her eyes and felt her body truly relax.

How could she have taken this for granted? How could she have put what they shared at risk?

How could she go on alone?

She felt a sob rise up in her chest again and firmly tamped it down.

Softly, she began to whisper to him...

-xxx-

Warmth... Movement... Touch... Words swirling in darkness like vapour... impossible to hear, too hard to decipher...

The touch of a tear.

Calculations, permutations...

Dull resistance.

Darkness relaxed against him...

His breathing slowed still further.

-xxx-

Laura awoke to the gentle rise and fall of someone else's breathing. Bill. Stretching her arm across him, she nestled her head more comfortably on his shoulder and kept her eyes closed. For just a moment, she could pretend...

As sounds increased in the hallway outside, however, she knew that she had to move. Someone would be in soon - Cottle, most likely - and she wanted to make sure he didn't find her anywhere near Bill. Reluctantly, she rose. After putting the coverlet back into place and smoothing it carefully, she walked towards the bathroom.

Once there, the thought of a shower was inviting, so she decided she might as well get ready for the day. Checking to see that there was a clean hospital gown on the shelf, she turned on the shower tap.

-xxx-

Cottle knocked softly on the door and cursed himself for being a fool as he did so. Since when did a doctor knock on a life station door before entering? Besides, he'd already warned Roslin to keep things decent - which, considering Bill's condition, shouldn't have been outside the realm of her capabilities.

Still, he paused a moment before opening the door.

When he entered the room, his gaze immediately travelled to Adama's bed. When he saw no Roslin, he glanced over to the other side of the room in surprise. Her bed was empty. The sound of the shower running then registered and he relaxed.

Walking over to Bill, he looked down at the man he had known for too many years and shook his head. "Bill, you old fool, you've got to stop this," he said in an undertone. "It's driving everyone crazy, me included." He propped open one of the Admiral's eyelids and shone a light into his eye. "Too many of us misfits need you to put up with us. We're getting nervous; not everyone has your patience."

Adama had been willing to put up with more of his idiosyncrasies than any commanding officer he'd ever served under. He'd been allowed to do things - and say things - that would have gotten him kicked off any other ship.

Hell, that had gotten him kicked off other ships.

Over drinks one night, he'd once asked Bill why.

His commanding officer had responded easily.

"Why do I put up with you? Because I trust you," Adama had said. "You know what's important. You're straight up and you're not afraid to tell the truth, even if people don't want to hear it." He'd then tipped his glass in a salute and added with a half-smile, "And because you're the best half-decent doctor I know, and some day I'm going to need your services."

The half-assed compliment was pure Adama, and Cottle had never forgotten it.

Moving to get Adama's chart, Cottle continued his one-sided conversation. "I'm telling you straight up, Bill. We can't do without you; not yet. Your son's a good man, but he's not ready for the responsibility of running the fleet. And you and I both know Tigh's still a frakked up mess; he'd be a disaster. Roslin's going to need your guidance, too. Someone needs to make her listen to reason." He paused. When he spoke next, his voice was gruffer. "Smarten up and wake up, Old Man. Frak it - lying on your back isn't how you handle things."

Hearing the shower shut off, he made a couple of quick notations on Bill's chart and then put it back into place. Stepping towards Roslin's bed, he picked up her clipboard and examined it for a moment before again addressing Bill.

"One of these days we're going to have to have a talk about you and this woman. She-"

The washroom door opened and he stopped abruptly. Looking up from the chart, he nodded his head in greeting. "Madame President," he said blandly.

"Doctor," she said in return. Not knowing what to expect from him, she looked at him warily as she moved across the floor and slipped into her bed. Her hair was still wet, and hung in dark, heavy waves around her face.

Cottle stepped closer to her side and began the cursory medical examination that had become their habit over the past couple of days. Taking her wrist, he counted her pulse, then took out a small flashlight the size of a pen and shone it into her eyes.

Trying not to blink, she asked, "Why do you do this?"

"I have no idea," he said as he straightened. "Saw it done on television once and liked the look of it. But don't worry, you're right as rain." Putting the flashlight back into his pocket, he looked at her directly for the first time and asked, "How are you feeling?"

"I feel good. I still appreciate an afternoon nap, though."

He nodded. "It'll take a while longer to be up to full speed, but you've definitely made a remarkable recovery." Turning, he returned to Adama's bedside and looked closely at the monitors on the wall over his bed. "Unlike this gentleman here. I don't know what the hell's up with him. His heart rate is down again," he commented. "How was his breathing last night?"

The question immediately put her on the defensive. "How would I know?" she asked.

His eyebrows lifted at her quick reply. He turned slowly. Looking at her pointedly, he said, "I just assumed that with your head on his shoulder, you might have noticed." Looking down, he carefully picked a long reddish hair off Bill's chest. Holding it up to emphasise his words, he asked, "I mean, what do you suppose the odds are that it was some other redhead left this here?"

Wishing she had something to throw at him, Laura bit her tongue.

Damn him, damn him, damn him.

Knowing better than to say any of the utterly stupid denials that first came to mind, she looked at him silently for a moment. Finally she said, "His breathing has always been slower than mine, but it's much slower than before, if that's what you mean. But he didn't seem to be having trouble breathing, if that makes sense."

His first thought was that it was way more information than he needed to know, but he still filed away the fact that she had charted his breathing against her own. Setting the thought aside, he curved his lips into a slight smile.

"That wasn't so hard to say, was it? And that's exactly what I needed to know. Good." He looked over at the monitor readings again and his smile faded. Everything was fine, technically, and there was no reason for the downward trend Bill's chart indicated. He shook his head. Coasting into death wasn't Adama's style, but if he allowed himself to drift along much further, there'd be no stopping the descent.

"I may have to put him on a ventilator if he doesn't start breathing a bit stronger on his own," he said.

It was a prognostication that troubled both doctor and president. On this, at last, they found themselves on common ground...

-xxx-

Work to do and words to speak...

So tired...

Unfinished business...

Rest...

The storm slowly shifted...

End
Chapter 17