Disclaimer: Gravitation and its characters are the property of Maki Murakami. I make no profit from this other than pleasure.
This is an AU, chapter one caveats still apply. :D
Warnings: Non-consensual sex, language, yaoi relationships...the usual in an adult Gravi fanfic. I'm thinking, after the first reviews, I need to add: Gritty reality. This is meant to be disturbing and hopefully thought-provoking. It's serious subject matter. That's why it's rated M.
A/N: You asked for it, you got it! Never let it be said reviews don't make a difference. This chapter didn't exist two days ago...and I thought the story was finished but for the polish. I admit...I hadn't really thought about how Eiri convinced Touma until y'all mentioned it, then the boys wouldn't let me sleep till I wrote it out. I kinda like the way it turned out—in fact, it's one of my favorite chapters!
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Chapter Five: Guilt
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Noon. And still no Shuuichi.
Hiro exchanged a worried glance with Suguru. Their youngest member, buried behind his portable synthesizer and earphones, had on his implacable game face, but he was worried too, Hiro could tell. And well they should be. This was the day their single was set to hit the stands and airwaves. This was the day when all their hard work paid off and the real work began.
And Shuuichi was beyond late.
And Sakano, who was supposed to be briefing them on the next stage of their careers . . . had been ordered to Seguchi-san's office.
Hiro pulled out his cellphone and, for the hundredth time that morning, quick dialed his best friend, only to get the instant transfer to voice mail he'd gotten every other time he'd tried to call.
What the hell was going on? Shu had been distracting him last night, he'd finally realized. Had gotten into that cab without ever saying where he was going. What was really going on between him and Yuki Eiri? Had he been going to meet the author? That would be an odd coupling, wouldn't it? His barely literate, homework-copying best friend with Japan's newest literary genius.
And he had to wonder. . . had Shu finally come out of the closet . . . even to himself? Hiro had known which way his friend swung since they hit puberty, but Shuuichi had always seemed blissfully oblivious. He'd always been on the search for the "perfect girl" to bless with his virginity. Was Yuki-san Shu's . . . perfect girl?
Hiro stifled a chuckle. Yuki-san had not looked like anyone's girl last night, but he was, without question one hell of a good-looking guy. And as exotic in his own way as Shu, with his golden hair and eyes. They'd make . . . an interesting set.
Not that he'd ever heard Yuki-san's name coupled with another guy. He was a notorious womanizer. Didn't mean he couldn't be tempted, and Shu could be . . . Hiro smiled gently into his coffee-mug . . . very tempting. Not to him, he knew Shu too well, loved him too much to ever be attracted that way. They were best friends, something far more precious than lovers.
The door to the conference room opened quietly and their manager slipped in.
Behind the synth, Suguru looked up expectantly, slipping the earphones down around his neck.
"Shuuichi?" Sakano asked, and Hiro shook his head. Sakano cursed softly, then: "Well, there's nothing to be done about it. Stow your instruments in the locker and meet me out front. Shacho-san's orders."
"Seguchi-san . . . ?" Hiro exchanged another look with Suguru, the CEO's cousin . . . who knew Seguchi Touma better than any of them. And some of his stories were enough to make Hiro's blood run cold. Suguru's face flickered with emotion, then settled back to the game face. He gave a little shrug and began putting his synth away.
Sakano disappeared again out the door.
Hiro, without another word, tucked his guitar into its case, helped Suguru stow the cords (after all this time, the little guy finally trusted him to do that much right) and they went together to secure their instruments, then made a silent trek to the front of the building where they found not just Sakano-san, but Seguchi-san as well.
The cousins exchanged a greeting equally chilly on both sides and Seguchi, whom Hiro had only actually talked to once before, greeted Hiro by name before waving them all toward the waiting limo. Seguchi and Sakano took the backmost seats, he and Suguru settled on the forward, backward-facing bench seat.
"There are drinks in the compartment beside you," Seguchi said smoothly. "Please, help yourselves."
Seguchi's game face was, if anything, better even than Suguru's, but Hiro could tell, thanks to his months with Su-kun, that the CEO was anything but pleased at the absence of their singularly distinctive front man. And yet, he said not a word about Shuuichi, for all he kept up a practiced small talk as the limo pulled out. He was displeased, but he wasn't surprised. Obviously, Sakano had already warned him.
So . . . where the hell were they headed? And why was the CEO with them? He'd patently ignored Bad Luck for the better part of a year since they signed the contracts with the vanity label, so . . . why . . .
On the far side of the limo, Seguchi was speaking in a low voice to Sakano and reaching into the soft-sided briefcase, he pulled out a CD and handed it to Sakano . . . whose face mirrored disappointment.
It was, Hiro knew from the bright label Shu had proudly designed, their demo CD. Obviously, the CEO had listened to it at last . . . and found it wanting.
Hiro heard a little caught breath next to him, glanced at Suguru and found the kid staring down at his lap . . . where those talented hands were clenched into angry little fists. Hiro dug into the cooler-compartment and pulled out the water Su-kun always preferred and using that as a pretext, set his hand on one of those fists, got Suguru's attention, conveying, in every way he knew how, that the CEO's opinion didn't matter. They would make it.
Damned if they wouldn't.
But . . . where in hell were they headed?
He'd never been one for small talk and finally, he could stand it no longer. "Please, sir," he said into an uneasy silence, "where are we going?"
A tiny smile twitched Seguchi's face. "Finally got up the nerve, Nakano-san?"
He blushed, and the smile widened a degree.
"It's no secret. I've a friend who heard you last night. He wanted to meet you." The smile turned to a frown. "All of you. He will be . . . disappointed, I fear."
"I'm sure there's a good reason—"
"Don't bother making excuses for him, Nakano-san. I've seen his type before. All too often, in this business. You will forgive me, I'm certain, for speaking frankly. Dedication is everything. Shindou-san is obviously lacking in that essential quality."
"There's no one more dedicated—"
"Forgive me again, Nakano-san. The front desk notes every arrival and departure. I know the times your band has been scheduled for studio time and what time he has arrived. I know dedication . . . and I know feckless. NG does not tolerate feckless."
Hiro pressed his lips together and bowed his head politely before turning back to the shaded windows. There was no point in arguing. Shu had his reasons. Those damned late night business dinners after every damned concert. Of course he'd sleep late after, and then he'd try to get his voice warmed up before coming in. Of course, the late dinners didn't interrupt Sakano's schedule, but he wouldn't attend them right after an exhausting concert.
Yes, dammit, there were reasons for Shu's tardiness. Reasons that wouldn't exist if they were with the main label. Unfortunately, he doubted the CEO would ever quite see it that way.
They'd entered a very exclusive residential neighborhood, the kind of neighborhood populated by very rich people. A tiny hope flared. Were they . . . finally . . . going to get a real patron? Someone who could make those late night dinners unnecessary? He stole a glance at Sakano, but his manager just looked . . . worried . . . and hope quickly faded.
The limo pulled up to one of the more modest dwellings . . . which was still larger than any house Hiro had ever been in . . . and the driver came around to open and hold the door. Seguchi-san slipped out first, liquid and graceful in all his movements, Sakano stumbled out in his wake and Hiro, with a final, reassuring squeeze of Suguru's hand, ducked out, Suguru right behind him.
They walked up to the front door and Sakano, at Seguchi's expectant look, pushed the doorbell button. The door opened immediately . . . on the striking blond Hiro had seen coming out of Shu's dressing room last night.
Wave upon wave of emotions, bright and dark, chased through him. What the hell was going on?
"I told you to knock, dammit," Yuki-san hissed, by way of greeting, and his golden eyes glittered with anger as he scanned all of them. "Where's Shindou?"
"Late, Eiri," Seguchi-san said, meeting that anger calmly. "I told you. He's a problem."
Yuki-san grunted, then jerked his head toward the building's interior and turning his back on them, headed in. Seguchi, with that slight smile followed him, but as Sakano moved toward the door, Yuki-san's voice barked:
"Seguchi, tell that simpering pimp that if he puts one foot inside my house, he'll be carried out in a body bag."
Sakano froze. His face went blank, then hard, so hard Hiro didn't recognize him. But:
"I'll wait in the limo," Sakano said quietly, and with a bow to Seguchi, "forgive me, Shacho-san."
Hiro stood uncertainly as his manager slipped by him and back to the car. Suguru, unfazed, followed his cousin into the house.
"Nakano?" That rich baritone voice was back, no warmer than before. "In or out, make up your mind."
Hiro stood his ground and met those golden eyes squarely. "Why'd you call him a pimp?"
The eyes narrowed. "You don't know?"
Something in Yuki-san's voice...His heart began to race, then stopped. Suddenly, he feared he did know. "Those . . . dinners Shu talked about. They . . . weren't dinners were they?"
Yuki-san scanned him with those narrow eyes, and the hard expression softened, ever-so-slightly.
"Get in here," he said, with a jerk of his blond head.
The door clicked shut behind him.
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How could he not have known? From the concert intros, it was obvious these two were best friends from childhood. They took pride in it. Yet . . . Nakano hadn't known. He'd swear the shock and hurt in his eyes was real.
Dinners. Gods. Had he ever been that naïve?
Seguchi, as usual, had arrived bearing gifts. This time, damned if he'd object, it was fresh strawberries and shortcake. He didn't know how the man managed it . . . he'd only called and asked Seguchi to bring Bad Luck here two hours ago. Likely the CEO just sent some poor overworked stooge out to pick the groceries up.
Not his problem. And he loved strawberry shortcake. He snagged a particularly plump berry from the bag Seguchi held and jerked his head toward the kitchen—Seguchi knew where to put everything—and when Touma was out of the way, turned to the two kids standing nervously in the entryway.
"Sit," he said around the strawberry, this time nodding toward the living room. He kept his voice low: Shindou was still asleep, and while the door to the bedroom was closed, he didn't want the kid coming out. Not yet.
Nakano and Suguru settled close to one another on the L-shaped couch. Eiri sat on the other leg, leaving the chair for Seguchi . . . assuming, of course, Seguchi would actually sit. The power of superior height was a favored position for him and one he could only achieve when everyone else in the room was seated.
Nakano's head was bent, he was explaining something to his younger bandmate, who, rather than looking shocked simply nodded his head. The kid, at least, had suspected. Not surprising. He was, after all, related to Seguchi.
The low-voiced conference came to an abrupt halt as Seguchi came into the living room—complete with opened beer for Eiri, water for himself . . . and nothing for the two boys. Eiri, with a snort, accepted it and leaned back into the cushions, his legs crossed comfortably.
Seguchi, predictably, remained standing. "Well, Eiri?"
"Did you know?" he asked flatly, and without explanation. Touma shrugged.
"Say, rather, I suspected. Not my problem. Bad Luck paid its bills. That's all that mattered."
"It is now."
Seguchi's brow tightened. "What do you mean?"
"I mean, it's your problem now. I mean, NG has assumed Bad Luck's contract."
Touma dropped into the chair, his face blank, and Eiri laughed silently. He'd gotten the slick bastard.
The kids on the couch just stared.
"The hell," Touma said at last. "What the fuck did you do, Eiri?"
"I followed that kid last night, after the concert. Followed him to a fucking penthouse suite where he was being drugged and raped. Unless you want it all over the gossip rags, damned right you'll pick them up and silence the whole mess."
Nakano went white and swayed where he sat. Suguru, after a moment's startlement, put an arm around the guitarist's shoulders and held him up.
Seguchi remained unmoved. "So? And this involves NG how?"
"F–forgive me, Seguchi-san," Nakano's voice broke in. "N–not now. Please, Yuki-san, is—is Shuuichi all right? Do you . . . know wh–where he is?"
Eiri took a deep breath, put his fury at his brother-in-law on a back burner and stood up. "He's here. Asleep. He seems to be all right." He headed for the hallway and the master bedroom, not the least surprised when Seguchi remained behind.
Even Seguchi Touma had his limits where it concerned the reality behind his cutthroat philosophy.
In the darkened bedroom, Shindou made a very small lump in the large bed. He was curled on his side, as he had been all night. And as it had been last night, it remained a troubled sleep, shuddering breaths interspersed with tiny whimpers. The sparkling chips on his forehead caught the light from the hallway.
"Oh, Shu . . ." Nakano whispered and turned away, looking near tears.
"I'd advise against waking him up," Yuki said, indifferent to whether they followed his advice or not. Now. "They gave him ketamine. It metabolizes pretty fast. Probably gone by now, but he can use the real sleep."
Nakano nodded. "I–I just want to sit with him."
"Hiro?" Suguru whispered, looking, for once, his age. Awkward and scared.
Nakano shook his head and pressed the younger boy's arm. "Probably better if it's just me when he wakes up."
Suguru nodded and Nakano walked softly to the chair beside the bed and sat gingerly on the edge, elbows on his knees, hands hanging limply between, his eyes all for his friend. Not hard to guess the thoughts racing behind those grey eyes. And every one of them riddled with guilt.
Eiri shook his head and shut the door on them.
Idiots. The lot of them. With the possible exception of Seguchi's canny little cousin. And the biggest idiot of them all was seated in his living room. He headed back there, Seguchi's canny little cousin in tow.
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Oh, Shu, Hiro thought, staring at his troubled friend. Why didn't you say something? Shu, for whom love and music were what life was all about. Shu, who had been saving himself for that perfect someone.
A rose-tinted dream he hadn't, Hiro suddenly realized, mentioned for months now.
How could he have missed it? Dinners. And he'd just assumed Sakano was part of those dinners, had assumed his idiot friend had charmed all those "dinner guests" as he charmed everyone who met him.
Damp dribbled down his cheeks and off his chin. Tears. His fault. It was all his fault. He should have seen the change, the growing sobriety, the intense concentration on the music.
The signature giggles and writer's block tantrums had all but disappeared. But they were all working so hard, he just hadn't thought, had assumed . . .
Too much. He'd assumed way too much.
He buried his face in his hands, and wept.
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"Explain," Touma said, coldly. Brutally ignoring his young cousin's presence.
Well, if Seguchi wasn't worried about the boy hearing, damned if he'd care.
Eiri took a good swig of beer, and let Touma have it, both barrels. "Simple. His trick was the American distributors for NG. They threatened not to carry Bad Luck's CD. I told them you'd pull the rest of NG's titles, that Bad Luck was under the NG label now and any contract they had with Sakano was null and void."
"You had no right—"
"Dammit, Seguchi," he let his anger flare, even as he kept his voice down. "You know fucking well my opinion of that fucking vanity label, and the things these fools do for a dream. Do or do not. Make a fucking choice and take a real risk. These kids are good as you fucking well know—"
"Screw you, Eiri. I listened to that demo. It was—"
"I know exactly what it was and why it was, and so do you. I also saw these kids on stage and I know damn good and well why you're holding them down."
Touma drew back, suspicion flaring his nostrils. Eiri smiled tightly.
"Everything he had at that age . . . and more."
Touma hissed. "Hardly. He was and is sheer magic onstage."
"And Shindou's not? Try again, Touma-sama."
Touma-sama. The name by which every Nittle Grasper fan had known him. Shindou wasn't the only reminder of Touma's former band.
"Are you suggesting—"
Eiri caught Suguru's narrowed gaze, knew the kid was following every innuendo. "I'm suggesting, Seguchi, that you're scared of these kids. You're afraid they're going to blast the Nittle Grasper legend to hell and gone and you're determined to stop it...in whatever way you can."
"Fuck you, Eiri."
"In your dreams. I'm calling your bluff, Seguchi. These kids will get their chance...if I have to back them myself."
"You wouldn't—"
"The hell I wouldn't. But I won't have to. I'll go to your competitors, and you can bet they'll listen to me and give these kids a listen, and if they do, they'll pick them up."
"Dammit, Eiri, you're thinking with your cock."
"And you're stretching, Touma. Care to lay a bet? Do you really want to take the chance that I'm wrong? Do you want Ryuichi's successor associated with a rival label?"
Touma scowled and Eiri chuckled.
"I didn't think so."
TBC
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A/N: The new "login to review" system at Gurabiteshiyon is certainly affecting reviews. Thanks to all of you who take the time to login and leave a word—I know it's a hassle—and Shu hugs to all the rest.
I'm sitting here watching the M's game, so thought I'd put in some direct responses to reviews:
Tsu: Yipes! I never thought about how that comment c/b taken! Whoopsie. No...I don't do death or even dismemberment fics. I adore the sheer life these two exude. Thanks in part to your review, there's a bit more Touma/Eiri in this one...hope you approve. There'll be more, for certain, in the sequel.
A-E: I really don't know about deleting the original post. Most of the reviews on the first two chaps are still available now ffnet is sorted out again, and I don't know about deleting those. Suggestions anyone? Yeah, the woman was the most dangerous and Eiri lays her out cold. Go YUKI! One of my favorite moments in the anime is when Eiri confronts Taki and turns his "dangerous Yuki" eyes on him. :D
RIR13: I love fluff where Shu is just charmingly soft and sweet, but even the canon Shu has a lot of backbone. Sometimes at the oddest moments, but, hey, he's Shu! Odd is his middle name:D
Kibou32: Not to worry. I love to hear from you when you have time.
Supershu: Heh heh, I have to admit, there are some (IMO) really sweet Yuki/Shu moments coming up. And yeah, this story is only ten chaps long and leaves a lot unresolved, as it concentrates on Yuki and Shu. So...reviews are helping the next section take shape. I think the only way to really explain canon Eiri's behavior early on is a reluctant fascination with Shu, once he sees him on stage. Especially in the anime but in the manga as well, that marks a distinct change in his behavior.
MoMo-chan: Heh heh...I've had lots of practice. :D Nothing replaces writing several million words.
Ghanima: Hope you like this chap...Yours was one of the reviews that gigged me into writing it!
Scorch66: the strawberry shortcake has been delayed a chap, but that chap s/b up this weekend.
Alaine: Eiri isn't so much pursuing Shu at this point as responding to a situation he seriously abhors (as I hope is made clear in this chap.) He's interested, intrigued, as he is in the canon, but the situation here shoves him into the drivers seat with the relationship (as you'll see next chap). As for punching Sakano...he massively insults him here, almost better than a punch in Japan. :D
Moon: I'm not really sure how Touma will develop as the story goes on. Even in the canon Touma, tho, I see a certain calculation in every move he makes. He . . . chooses his times with Eiri very carefully and he certainly rather cold-bloodedly manipulates Shu and Taki. I do like the hard businessman side as a contrast to all the complete artists. There's a bit more of the "Eiri calls the winners" in this chap, but I'll keep it in mind for the sequel. I see it mostly as a casual reality between them. I see them as doing a fair amount of talking business, both Eiri's and Touma's. I mean, these two have known each other for at least the better part of ten years. They have to have done a fair amount of "bull-shooting" over dinners and drinks.
As for Eiri's attraction to Shu...I find it kind of creepy that all he would see in him is a whiny kid, as some fics seem to imply. I really don't see Eiri as a pedophile, so what arouses his interest has to be something more solid. I don't think it's an accident that the manga Shu onstage in that first concert has a lot of the same adult sex-appeal as Ryu. That one panel as he breaks into No Style's a hell of an image.
Bubble: All I can say is...wait two chapters! ;-)
Moon (again): One of my favorite bits in the anime is the way (at the meeting in the park) Eiri's face is first very shadowed, and then, viola! Shu (and we) get our first real look at Mr Hunkacious. If I caught some of that here, I'm delighted.
Re: subject matter...er, um, it's not all that unusual for me. My original characters constantly want to go work for someone else. I'm...uh...not very nice to them. In actual fact, one of the things I enjoy about writing the Gravi fanfic is that I've learned to lighten up a bit. Cotton Candy Snow was really different for me. :D My characters will probably want to take Yuki and Shu out to a steak dinner in thanks, if that tone begins to reflect into the original stuff. :D
I feel the same about Shu. Especially...consider, in canon he allowed himself to be raped to protect Eiri's reputation. And then, he tries hard to make light of the whole thing, even as it threatens to end his career. When it comes to protecting his loves (Eiri and Music) I think he'd do about anything.
Catmum56: One thing I love about Yuki is his ability to exude "I'm dangerous". The type of individuals who would use money and position to manipulate young artists aren't the sort who would stand up to a man like him. Cowards at heart...like Taki. Only the bodyguard gal who meets him at the door might, and Yuki takes care of her in short order. Re: Literature classes: I'm not a big fan of non-writers making assumptions about what makes writers tick.
One of the best commentaries I've ever read on Lit classes is a short story by Isaac Asimov (I think the title is "The Bard") It's just a conversation between a Lit teacher and a physicist in a bar. It's from the Lit teacher's POV and the physicist is talking (drunkenly) about having invented a time machine and bringing Wm. Shakespeare into the present. Seems Willy was all excited that he'd become such a Big Deal. He took a class on Shakespeare at the college (from the Lit teacher). The Lit teacher obviously becomes very excited and wants to meet him. But he can't. The physicist had to send him back because he got all upset. Why? Because the Lit teacher flunked him.
Ray: Oh...the jewels. We aren't through with them, I promise!
Til next time! —Vin