Disclaimer: Lihau does not own the Teen Titans. Or Wal-Mart. Don't ask.

Chapter Summary: And you thought that the wrath of Khan was scary...

Author's Note: Hi, this is Kid Flash! I'm really sorry that I took so long but it isn't really my fault… actually it is, because I kinda typed-so-fast-I-broke-the-keyboard (cough). So then I forgot what I'd written except that it was really good so then I had to figure out what to type that was at least as good as the original copy. Okay, so I know the story because it really happened, but I phrased the first draft really good, and hopefully this version is at least half as good.

I still haven't finished my story but I didn't wanna keep you waiting any longer, so I've decided to post my story in parts. Here's the first part.

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The Wrath of Batman

or

Falling: An Unfortunately Very True Story

PART ONE

By Kid Flash

Well, that warm fuzzy ending that Robbie wrote couldn't possibly last very long. Even though I'd kinda—partially—almost—fine.

Even though I'd totally forgotten that Batman was gonna beat the kangaroos out of my top paddock, I was gonna be reminded about accidentally discovering the Batcave very soon.

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Robin, Wonder Girl, and I—the unofficial pre-Teen Titans—were hanging out on the JLA Satellite when the Boy Wonder asked me when I was planning to tell Batman about IT.

"Me?" I replied. "Why can't you ask him?"

"You're the one that barged in," Robin pointed out.

"You're his sidekick."

"You should tell him," we chorused before glaring at each other.

I insisted, "He'll be less likely to kill us if you tell 'im."

"Why don't you both tell him?" Wonder Girl suggested diplomatically. Ah. Spoken as one whose life was not in danger.

"Tell him what?" Aqualad, who'd we just met yesterday, wondered as he entered the rec room. He was quick to add, "If you do not mind telling me."

"Promise you won't tattle?" I demanded.

"I pro—what is 'tattle'?"

"Tell anybody else," Robin explained.

"I promise."

"Fine," I nodded. Taking a deep breath, I blurted out, "I-accident'ly-found-the-Batcave-it's-really-neat-too-but-that's-not-the-point-the-point-is-that-I-found-it-an'-I-wasn't-s'posed-to-so-now-I'm-in-trouble-with-Batman-but-not-jus'-trouble-'cause-there's-no-such-thing-as-jus'-bein'-in-trouble-with-Batman-you-can-only-be-in-REALLY BIG-trouble-with-'im!"

Robin, apparently thinking that my speech was not quite understandable, summarized, "He accidentally found the Batcave. That's bad."

Funny, it had never occurred to me to put it like that. That was… so… concise.

"What he said," I agreed.

"I heard of someone else who found the Batcave once. They never heard from him again."

"I-DON'-BELIEVE-YOU-BE-QUIET!" I yelled, knowing who it was before I even turned around.

The archer shrugged and I glowered. I still hadn't quite forgiven him for yesterday's incident. The one where he'd freaked me out by informing me that babies came from Wal-Mart®. Please, don't make me explain why I believed him, 'cause I don't know. Pardon me for a moment while I go bury my head in shame...

Okay, I'm back.

And yes, this was Speedy who grinned and said, "So you found the Batcave, huh? Where is it?"

Robin glared at him, saying, "You'd just love to know, wouldn't you?"

"And have Batman at my throat?" he snorted. "No, thanks!"

Still just a teeny bit petrified, I begged, "Please, guys! Help me! I don't wanna be killed by Batman-I-really-don'-I'm-too-young-to-be-killed-yougottahelpmeI'lldoanythin'!"

"He won't kill you," Wonder Girl assured me.

"Oh. Yeah. Right. And Superman is a nerd with glasses," I said sarcastically.

"Don't even joke like that," protested Speedy in defense of his idol. "Superman… is Superman!"

For whatever reason, Robin found this funny and started snickering. Arrows and I scowled at him, and Green Arrow's sidekick snapped, "Inside joke?"

Robin just shook his head and laughed. And I still don't know what the heck he was laughing at… unless…

Maybe Superman's alter ego is a nerd with glasses?

…Nah.

No way.

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A/N: Did you like? If you did, please review! And if you didn't, please review! If you're reviewing 'cause you didn't like it, though, please don't be too mean!

The next chapter, which I've just started typing, should probably have a warning label on it. Let's see… maybe something like…

"Warning!: Speedy being nice to Kid Flash!"

Yeah….