Chapter 1: "Standard living is a disease that kills you slowly. People lucky enough to be free from it die another way. Probably by suicide."

For Natsuki "normalcy" was as elusive as a cure for cancer. Just when she thought she knew what it was that makes a normal, teenage girl "normal"-- other people began to call her otherwise. It was all very ironic really... In her earlier years, when she had been so unapproachable and anti-social, she was admired. But now that she had decided to put a little more effort in fitting in-- her schoolmates began to shun her. It began with rumors... Rumors that were both ungrounded speculation and ridiculous lies. The source of these malicious whispers was unknown, but the more they circulated-- the nastier they became. Until finally, the hurtful words became name-calling, and the name-calling became a title.

"Freak."

"Weirdo."

"Dyke."

The last one often made her want to lash out since it brought up memories she'd rather forget. It had been easy to play deaf to the backbiting at first, and with her friends by her side-- she stood strong against the verbal assault. But peer pressure was a potent venom. When her social stigma extended to the others, they abandoned her one by one. Self-conscious Chie had been the first to go, followed by a reluctant Aoi. Then Tate left followed by tag-along Shiho. But Mai... Good ol' Mai and loyal Mikoto... They were determined to stick by Natsuki's side. Especially Mai despite her boyfriend's betrayal... As far as Natsuki knew, the couple's relationship had been rocky and unstable since then. She could not help but feel a little guilty about that.

As for the others, the older ones had obviously graduated and she was not particularly close to rest. Midori went back to her University to finish her thesis. Even though she was a freshman repeater which, put her in the same level as Takumi and Akira, they were in a different class with different schedules. As for Nao? The backstabbing bitch probably helped fuel the rumors.

Yes, Natsuki was mostly alone in this one... She wouldn't show it, but the almost daily emotional abuse was beginning to wear her down. Rampaging Orphans, highly trained agents, homicidal magical girls-- all these she could handle. She could not put a bullet through ordinary people's heads and expect to get away with it. So she kept to herself more and more, and built higher, thicker walls around her heart to dull the pain. Mai and Mikoto understood this but hoped that their friend would not forget to approach them if she needed their help. On the occasions that they 'bumped' into Natsuki, they made sure she knew they would always welcome her with open arms.

She began to wonder if, maybe, her association with the famous Shizuru had been the reason why everyone vied for her attention in the past. But then, to be fair to the older girl, she wondered if Shizuru had been protecting her from these ignorant bastards all along. Either way was possible. Friendship with Fujino Shizuru was like a double-edged sword. The closer they were to her, the sharper the blade; and Natsuki had been more than just her friend at one point. What a mistake that had been...

A stab of pain made the raven-haired girl press a fist to her chest. It still hurt... thinking about her-- even after five months.

"I thought the roof was empty..." She heard someone whisper, and stiffened.

"Ew, what's that dyke doing out here."

Then there was silence. Natsuki thought that whoever had intruded on her sanctuary had decided to leave her be. No such luck, however... She heard a few shuffling noises and the distinctive sound of lunches being taken out of their plastic/paper bags and bento boxes being opened. "You know? I can't believe Fujino-sama would want to sully her hands on a freak like that. It's so disgusting!"

"Ehh?! You think Fujino-sama is disgusting too?"

"No way! Fujino-sama is probably a victim in all this. The freak probably raped her or something..."

Something inside Natsuki finally snapped. She spun around, her green eyes flashing with rage at the three girls who were sitting against the wall near the doorway. "YOU KNOW NOTHING!!" The shrill quality and sheer vehemence of her voice was enough to shock them all. She stomped towards them. The girls were too petrified with fear to move a muscle, expecting the infamous Kuga to beat them all up. But she walked past them and exited the roof.

---

At first, she had intended to walk into a bathroom, lock herself in a stall, and try to get her act together. But the more she lost control over emotions, the quicker her steps became until she was running-- until she passed the bathroom, passed through the dome that had once housed the mythical Ikusahime Crystal and through the school's arched entryway. Tears blurred her vision and streamed down her cheeks. She tried to run faster, to shield the evidence of her humiliation from intruding eyes with her forearm-- which narrowed her view in the process. Thus, she did not see who she nearly ran over as she escaped through the woods nor did she realize that the person had looked at her in dismay before trailing after her.

Somehow, for some odd reason, her legs carried her to the empty garden. This was where she first met her. Oh how she cursed this place, how she hated it. If she hadn't met her, her life would've been less complicated. How dare that woman open her heart-- only to rip it apart.

She lifted her head and screamed to the heavens. She screamed to the sky, to Shizuru and blamed her. Blaming her for her pain gave her such shallow satisfaction and empty freedom it became a lot easier to blame EVERYTHING on Shizuru than give in to self-pity. She screamed until her voice was raw, until it drained her of her energy and caused her knees to buckle underneath her. She crumpled to the ground in defeat.

"You know, you could've taken up on my offer of coming to confession months ago, Kuga. You never know what kind of nosy, inconsiderate person might be listening out here. Though I'll admit, your reputation can't get any worse than it already is." The dry tone, the casually evil and insensitive way the words were delivered could only belong to one person.

"Nao..." Natsuki snarled. The intrusion renewed her fury and her vigor. She gave into her impulses and pounced on the unsuspecting redhead. The younger girl yelped as she was tackled to the ground. Natsuki straddled her hips and grabbed the front of Nao's standard orange Junior uniform with trembling hands. She pulled their faces close to each other so that there was no mistaking that Nao was going to pay for her impudence. "You bitch! You stupid, fucking bitch!"

The redhead sneered in reply even though this uncharacteristic display of rage from Natsuki made the demonic part of her pause. She wondered idly if she had bitten off more than she could chew. Knowing how she sucked at being "compassionate," patronizing the older girl with false comfort would only cement Natsuki's conviction of killing her. She might as well go down with aplomb. "What? You gonna blame me for your oh-so miserable life too?"

Natsuki shook her violently and Nao grunted in pain. "Shut up! You know nothing! You don't know her like I do! She used me! She violated me! It's because of her, everyone hates me! She took everything away from me! She, she monopolized my life! She took away my right to avenge my mother! She took my mother. She--"

The last accusation was so fucking ridiculous to Nao's ears she could not help but cut in sarcastically, "Oh yeah... Fujino was such a psycho brat back then." That silenced Natsuki. She looked down at Nao so pathetically and helplessly it made the redhead's insides churn. God, she had never seen Natsuki look so vulnerable before. Normally, she would've relished such expressions on people's faces. It would've made her feel better about herself, knowing that there was someone more pathetic than she was. But this face... It did just the opposite. She did not like this feeling. She did not like this new weakness at all.

She buried the unwelcome feeling of sympathy deep inside the dark recesses of her heart-- to be ignored and hopefully forgotten. But apparently it was not been deep enough.

Her traitorous thoughts wandered to the past, realizing how similar it was with Natsuki's. She thought about how she lost her mother, how Natsuki must've felt when she lost hers. She had been angry, bitter and desperate back then-- and channeled all these misplaced feelings on men. What a pointless venture that had been... She was lucky enough to realize that running away from her problems like that had been a waste of her time, efforts and self-imposed agonies. Natsuki was obviously still caught in that cycle of denial and escapism, and for some reason it made Nao a little angry.

'Dammit Kuga! You're my rival! You're supposed to be stronger than this! You're supposed to be strong so that I can break you myself!'

"Stop blaming her, Kuga. Stop blaming everyone and yourself. If you had to blame something, blame the fates. The bitches probably think it's funny to make your life a living hell. You either fight back or just kill yourself. You can go ahead and whine all you want-- just take responsibility for your life and do something about it!" She watched the hopeless expression on Natsuki's face slowly melt away to be replaced by... something else. Whatever it was, for some reason, it made Nao feel a little breathless and more than a little unnerved.

'Don't look at me like that. Like... Like I'm supposed to save you.'

"Will you let me go now? They're gonna think we're fucking if anyone sees us like this." Natsuki reddened and she leapt away from her, putting an exaggerated distance between them. Nao looked down at her crinkled uniform with a frown, before lifting her head to smirk at her. "Great, now I look like someone tried to molest me. Next time, can you not grab the front of my shirt? Unless you were aiming for something else... Oh! So perverted, Na-tsu-ki."

"N-NAO!"

The mortified/flustered expression on Natsuki's face was absolutely priceless! And the poor girl could not get any redder. Maybe the Kyoto bitch had been on to something with this "let's-embarrass-Natsuki" business. That was surprisingly fun.

Natsuki did not trust herself to speak. So she glared at the tittering girl instead. When the laughter finally died down, she continued to stay silent. What could she say? She was ashamed of herself for breaking down in front of her supposed arch nemesis, and embarrassed that... said-arch-nemesis had given her something to think about. It made her feel stupid and childish in comparison.

"The offer still stands." Nao said, in between chuckles, as she rose from the ground and dusted herself off. She cocked her head at Natsuki, who refused to meet her eyes. "You really should come. Keeping all that anger inside can't be good for your head." Then surprising the both of them, she offered, "I have duties tomorrow. Come by the church if you feel like it."

"You're still a Novice?" Baffled and scandalized at the very idea, Natsuki finally glanced up at her.

Nao shrugged indifferently. "It's an obligation I can't escape from... this time."

Although the cryptic answer puzzled her and Nao's unexpected kindness disturbed her, Natsuki was desperate (and fearfully hopeful) to know, "Can I trust you?"

The aura of malice cloaked Nao as easily as one would put a jacket back on. She grinned seductively. "I'm training to be a nun, not a saint." She turned around to leave but not before saying, "See ya around, Kuga." And then she was gone.

---

The part-time waitress turned temporary counter girl looked up from her task of wiping the water ring off the countertop when she heard her name being called. A friendly smile lit up her face when she saw who it was that just came in. "Hey Chie-chan. Where's Aoi-chan?"

The handsome, bespectacled girl sighed and sat down on one of the stools lining alongside the counter. She gave Mai a mildly exasperated look before countering, "Why is it that everyone asks me that when I'm alone? Jeez..."

"Well... it's just that... it's unusual seeing you by yourself since I've known you and Aoi-chan, you know?" The busty redhead stuttered.

"You don't hear ME asking where Mikoto-chan is when you're on your own."

"WellSHE'S not my girlfriend."

Chie blushed a little bit at that and looked around nervously. "Mai-chan... Don't say that in public." She looked around again thus, missing the frown on her friend's face. "The place is kinda empty. Slow day?"

Mai sighed a little and put the rag away. She placed one of her hands on her hips and the other one underneath her chin in a contemplative pose. "Yeah... It kinda is, isn't it? There must've been a forecast that it's gonna rain later. That, or I'm going to have to find another job soon!" They both of them chuckled at that.

"Speaking of jobs, why are you still working? I thought Takumi-kun had his operation already."

"Yeah," the redhead's smile dropped a little. "We-- that is, I haven't finished paying for his bills yet. Our doctor was kind enough to give me enough time to find the money to pay him. With five percent a month and no interest, no less." Then she slapped a hand to her well-endowed chest (jiggling them a little much to Chie's secret pleasure) and grinned passionately. "But it's nothing I can't handle! With the three jobs I have, my debt will be cleared in a year or so! And Director Himeno-san is letting us stay in the dorms for free with free meals so we really don't have much to worry about!"

"Well duh, if I remember correctly... you and Takumi-kun have scholarships. Your brother, I can understand. But I've seen your grades! And your huge-ass tits have always hindered your performance in sports--"

"CHIE-chan!" Mai cut in, embarrassed.

The dark-haired girl shrugged sheepishly. "What? It's true! And I've always been curious... What kind of scholarship do you have?" Then, she stared at Mai intensely which made the redhead squirm imperceptibly and avoided her gaze. "Did that... incident from last year... have anything to do with it?"

What could Mai say to that, really? Definitely not the truth-- it was just too unbelievable. Plus, she didn't want to relive that awful time again anytime soon. Although, she always had a feeling that Chie and Aoi kind of knew. "It's a cooking scholarship, alright!" She exclaimed, and inwardly applauded herself for her brilliant quick thinking. But when Chie looked at her for a moment, with that unreadable expression on her face, she felt exposed.

"Yeah, I can see why they'd give you a scholarship for that one." Chie finally said with a grin, and Mai smiled back a little.

"You, um, want to order anything?"

"Oh! Sorry. I'd like a glass of Oolong tea and one piece of strawberry shortcake, please."

Mai nodded in acknowledgement and turned around to prepare her friend's order. She could feel her gaze boring into her back and wondered if Chie had seen through her lie after all. "I saw Natsuki cry during lunch time today." Whatever she had been expecting the boyish girl would say, she hadn't expected that. She spun around to look at Chie questioningly.

"What do you mean? What happened? Is Natsuki-san okay?"

Chie looked down at the counter top when she answered, "I don't know. I didn't follow her." When she glanced up and saw the disappointed and disapproving look on Mai's face, she hurriedly defended, "I didn't get a chance to, okay? She was running really fast and disappeared before I could do anything!" She looked down in shame once again. "I couldn't do anything..."

"Chie-chan." Mai was still mad.

"I know what I did to Natsuki-san was horrible," she rubbed the sides of her face in agitation, "but I just... I'm afraid, Mai-chan. You don't know how hard it is to hide who you really are. You've seen how they treated Natsuki-san. And her being... gay... is only a speculation. Imagine if they find out about me and Aoi-chan. I just--" Chie jumped when Mai (nearly) slammed her drink down in front of her. Her cake followed after much more gently.

"That's no excuse for abandoning our friend like that, Chie-chan." Mai told her. 'And I do know what it's like to live a lie, Chie-chan... More than you realize.' She cooled down a little at the thought and laid a reassuring hand on her taller friend's shoulder. "You wanna come with me to check up on her, later? We should bring Mikoto-chan and Aoi-chan along with us too."

Chie was about to open her mouth to reply when she heard the tinkle of bells that indicated that the front door had been opened. She saw Mai's face brighten with such intensity-- she practically glowed. She turned around expecting to see Tate but the sight of Natsuki, hesitating by the door, surprised her.

"Natsuki-san!!!" Mai exclaimed. She walked around the counter, ignoring how her co-workers and manager looked at her, and ran over to throw her arms around the taller girl. "Oh my god, Natsuki-san! You're here!"

"Not for long!" Natsuki gasped as Mai's killer boobs and crushing hug practically squeezed the breath out of her. Finally noticing Natsuki's plight, Mai let go of her with an embarrassed flush. When she finally took a good look at Natsuki's face and saw how puffy her eyes were, she made a startled sound. Well, this confirmed Chie's story.

"Are, are you okay?"

Natsuki just shrugged and made her way towards the counter. She sat down beside Chie who flinched when she leveled a blank green gaze on her. "I'm just gonna go..." Chie mumbled in discomfort. She paid for the meal she had yet to eat before she rose from her seat and scurried away. Mai's pointed look did nothing to stop her escape, and she was out the door before any of them could say a word.

"I can't believe her!" Mai raved.

"It's okay, Mai-chan..." Natsuki answered dully. "Can I have something to eat? Maybe something with lots of mayo on it?"

The waitress stormed angrily back to her original post. She retrieved Chie's money and nudged the cake and the tea towards Natsuki. "It doesn't have lots of mayo on it, but it's Chie-chan's treat."

"Just give me a bottle of mayo, Mai-chan. Strawberry's not really my thing, and I gotta drown the flavor with something." The raven-haired girl smirked when she saw the anger in Mai's face fade to be replaced by a disgusted look.

"You're not normal, Natsuki-san."

"As if I didn't know that already."

---

The sun had already disappeared over the horizon by the time Natsuki left the restaurant. Seeing Mai again coupled with the unusual albeit oddly uplifting encounter with Nao put her in a good mood for once. Her mind began to stray as she walked through downtown ... returning to a certain redhead again and again. Her curiosity gnawed at her. Her confused and suspicious mind demanded that she solve the mystery that was Yuuki Nao. That was the reason why she visited Mai in the first place-- hoping that her friend would provide a different perspective of their mutual troublemaking acquaintance. Alas, Natsuki had been too embarrassed by her newfound fascination-- 'CURIOSITY!!' of Yuuki Nao and made small talk about everything else instead.

'She was so... different. Is that how she really is? Or is she up to something again?' Natsuki exhaled through her nose in exasperation. 'Argh! Why am I even obsessing over this?! Just forget about it! Forget her!'

The pedestrians began to thin, the buildings grew more deprecit, and the alleys became narrower as she walked. She passed under a familiar sign that said "Rorschach" and knew she was now entering the darker side of the town of Fuuka. Then she heard them. She glanced over her shoulder to see who was following her and saw three familiar boys walking behind her at a leisurely pace. They met her eyes and smirked then elbowed each other conspiratorially. Then it hit her. Literally. The nearest one lunged at her with a fist and caught her in the jaw. The attack had been so fast and so unexpected, she didn't have time to dodge.

She fell to her knees, head spinning, her senses rattling from the impact and the pain. Strong hands grabbed her arms before she could recover, and she was promptly dragged into a dark alley. The two boys shoved her against the wall, pinning her arms on either side. The remaining one, apparently the leader, stood in front of her and began to punch her. He yelled at her, taunted her and laughed along with his friends. When it looked like she was about to fight back or when she was about to open her mouth to scream, he would knee her in the stomach to stop her.

Lightning streaked through the sky. The air cracked with electricity which was followed by rumbling thunder. By the time the rain fell, Natsuki was close to passing out with pain. Her abuser stepped back to survey his handiwork and smiled malevolently. Then he reached down and unzipped his pants.

---

Footnotes:

I'm terribly sorry for the delayed update. I was supposed to upload this chapter two weeks ago! But I lost my damn flashdisk and had to rewrite the whole damn thing again. As a bonus, I've uploaded another chapter. I'm currently prioritizing consistency over quality since I have this very bad habit of leaving a story unfinished if I left it alone for too long. That's why I have you, my dear readers, to point out my mistakes for me. I'll try to upload a chapter bi-weekly.

I adore you all for the reviews! Kisses for each of you! Chu! xYuki, you know I worship you, right? ((wink)) Your stories were what finally motivated me to write this damn thing. Especially when I read your Oh My Juliet the night I was feeling really nostalgic about our local rock scene. I love how you portray your characters. And I loooove the fact that you know what you're writing about.

Anyway, read on, my dears. Read on.