Disclaimer: I own no part of Dragonball Z whatsoever, not even Krillin's "Mondo-cool" stuff. I mean, no offence to the little guy, his attacks on Budokai are pretty ace, but. the mondo-cool stuff. is not mondo-cool.

The Ultimate Largely Massive Pointlessly-Named Big Final Bout Super Tournament. 5!!! - Chapter 18!

Ah, just kidding, I love the mondo-cool. Put some more in!

Leanne wasn't sure what surprised her more: What Amy said about a child, or D-Chan's remark about wanting to eat a comet. Could DJ and Amy really have a child? Cute, serene Amy and shy-as-Hell DJ?!
          "Whatcha thinking about, Leanne?" D-Chan asked, snapping her out of her trail of thought.
          "Huh?" She replied, caught off guard. "Oh, it's nothing, D-Chan."
          "Nothing, huh? You're sure putting a lot of thought into just nothing."
          "Gak! It really IS nothing, D-Chan! Really!"
          "Oh." D-Chan finally said. Leanne seemed relieved that D-Chan had bought it, but that relief was discarded when D-Chan continued. "So, it's nothing at all to do with the fact that DJ and Amy have had children together since 14 years of age, which would be not only weird on Earth but illegal as well, yet what most don't know is that back on our home planet the legal age of consent is actually 14?" Leanne fell back. D-Chan had got it in one. D-Chan didn't seem overly intelligent (no offence to her, of course), but at times she'd just temporarily become the smartest member of the entire cast!
          "D-Chan? How do you know these things? I mean, sorry, but you're not exactly the brightest penny in the fountain."
          "True, but I'm still not the dimmest either. Even though I'm in my own little world all the time, I just silently take everything in." Then, in a mocking voice, D-Chan added: "D-Chan knows all, sees all!"
          "If you know all and see all," Jedite started. "Then how come you have to ASK whether delicious foods are delicious?" This made D-Chan burst out in a fit of laughter.
          "Hey, what's going on?" Gokan asked as he arrived, followed by Zori, Zeon, hawk, Angel, Xell, Hitomi and Sarah.
          "Jedite just made D-Chan laugh her butt off!" DJ exclaimed. "I think they may be breaking the ice here!"
          "I could sure go for some ice cream!" D-Chan chimed.
          "Yeah, me too. Where can we get some before the match starts?"
          "The only place is the food courts, but how can you still be hungry?" Sarah asked. The answer to Sarah's question arrived in the form of a long rumble from D-Chan's stomach.
          "Again!?" Everyone asked.
          "Yep." D-Chan smiled. "I'm hungry again."

In the corridor leading out to the arena, Amy was just standing there, staring out as though hesitating. Taking in a deep breath, holding it and then letting it out again, Amy was about to make her first steps out to the fight of her life, when.
          "Hey, Balloon Breasts! How come you're still back here?" Lisa asked.
          "Lisa, I've told you time and time again not to call me that." Amy sighed. "What is it that fascinates you so much about my chest anyway?" Lisa suddenly gained a look of disgust.
          "Whaddayamean 'fascinated'!?" she cried. "Amy, you are NOT making this into a Shoujou-ai story!!" Lisa obviously hadn't forgotten about when Amy pretended to hit on her when she became depressed.
          "How about a deal, Lisa?" Amy finally asked. "If I win this match, you're never allowed to make fun of my bust ever again."
          "Got it!" Lisa called. "But if I win, you have to wear a second-skin leotard to show off ALL of your curves!" Amy's face turned as red as a certain army's ribbon (Red Ribbon Army reference here, folks!).
          "Why, you little." Amy started, but she decided to stop before she put herself in an awkward position. She expected Lisa to go through a forfeit if she lost the match, so it was only fair for Amy to go through a forfeit upon her defeat. "Fine. But let's make things a little more interesting. The victor is to never be ridiculed about her bosom again, and the defeated has to wear the leotard you mentioned."
          "Done. We'll make sure to get the right sizes, of course!"
          "Of course. OK, let's go."
          "KICKASS!!" Lisa cheered as she ran toward the arena, Amy hesitantly following. Her pulse was racing and her heart was skipping beats, although beating a lot faster and harder than usual. 'This is a very crucial time.' Amy fearfully thought. 'For the sake of my dignity, I cannot lose this match!'

          "What do you guys do here anyway?" Krillin asked. He was in the bar with Delon, Kage, Zin and Piccolo.
          "Well, we usually find places of tranquillity and solitude, because we like to channel our energy and concentrate on becoming stronger." Delon replied.
          "But then we thought: What's the point in becoming stronger if there's no-one to brag to about it?" Kage added. "So we decided to channel energy in the same place!"
          "That's not it!" Zin corrected. "We're here to prolong and enhance our energies by concentrating on our four ki levels as one!"
          "Yeah, get your facts right!" Piccolo grumbled. "Why are we concentrating our ki with a guy who's doing it for the wrong reason?"
          "I was only making a joke, Piccolo." Kage sighed. "But then, I guess you don't appreciate humour of any kind. So Krillin, why are you here?"
          "That new android took my job." Krillin sighed. "What's a bald referee supposed to do if there's something else out there doing the job HE'S supposed to do?"
          "Why not just use a Destructo-disc on him?"
          "Because they'll force Krillin to pay for the damages." Zin replied. "Besides, I don't think a Destructo-disc alone is enough to take down that cocky bag of bolts. By the way, whose match is next?"
          "It's Amy and Lisa, I think." Krillin said.
          "Hot damn! I've been waiting for this one!" Piccolo cheered. This was completely out of character for him, though. "Those two have a worse rivalry than Bulma and Chichi at times! Let's go check it out!"
          "He's suddenly perky." Delon said, standing up.
          "Well, let's not keep the girls waiting." Zin added, taking the lead.

          "Ummmmmmm....." Miyamoto stammered as he laid eyes on Amy. She, sensing Miyamoto's robotic gaze on her vulnerable frame, felt a shiver run down her spine.
          "Is something wrong?" Amy asked, trying to break the tension.
          "How do you expect to battle. with THOSE?!" Miyamoto asked, pointing you-know-where. Amy grabbed at her own chest in an attempt to conceal it and blushed.
          "Please don't stare!" Amy cried. Miyamoto noticed the innocence and fear in Amy's face, as well as a lot of blushing.
          "You should go home now!" He commented. "It'd be a shame to ruin that face!"
          "Oh no, ya don't!" Lisa cried. "We came here to fight, and we're gonna fight!"
          "Who said that?" Miyamoto demanded, turning to face Lisa. 'Whoa. the Human Emotions Interface in my nervous circuitry is acting up. It's programming me to realise that this girl is, in fact, unbelievably attractive and beautiful. but. I HATE THAT!!!!!'
          "Hey, you OK?" Lisa asked.
          "What!?" Miyamoto yelled. "Don't you have a horror movie shoot to get to, Silicone Girl!?" Lisa couldn't imagine what she'd possibly done to deserve THAT. I mean, all she did was ask if Miyamoto was OK, and he went and insulted her. And to top it all off, Amy was the one with the impossibly huge breasts, and LISA was the one accused of having implants!! That pissed her off!
          "Why, you snobby little insulting defective BASTARD!" She yelled. "Listen, I don't like talking about my breasts all that much, but I'll at LEAST tell you that they're a hundred percent ME!"
          "Ooh, she's making a showcase now!" Miyamoto taunted. "Can you say PORNSTAR, people in the audience?"
          "Ewwww, that's the LAST thing I'd wanna be! If you have the energy to accuse me of things I'd never do, then why don't you chew peanuts with your eyes and eat spaghetti through your nose, you offence to God!?"
          "Well, if you really want me to."
          "Excuse me." Amy sighed. "But while we'd all love to see you defy the laws of your respiratory and digestive organs, we'd really like to continue with the fight." Amy didn't yet realise that Miyamoto was a robot. Yep, she thought Hidoi and Miyamoto were human.
          "OK, get on with it. Oh, and don't ruin this girl's pretty face, Silicone Girl." Miyamoto said as he left.
          "GAAAAAAAAAAH!!!" Lisa screamed in rage. "Bulma, Chichi, PLEASE let me fight that thing instead!!!"
          "No. Your fight's with me." Amy said.

Considerably closer to the action this time sat DJ, Jedite, D-Chan, Zori, Zeon, Thomas, Leanne, Zin, Delon, Kage, Krillin, Gokan, Bakaryu, Sarah, Piccolo, Hawk, Angel, Xell and Hitomi (Phew!).
          "Man. it looks like Amy's really serious this time!" Gokan cried.
          "I hope Lisa-chan's gonna be OK." Zori added.
          "No time for that now: the fight's starting!" Angel called. "Cut to the next paragraph!"

This paragraph is set a few seconds before Angel stated that the fight was starting, to save things for the hardcore fight fans.
          "What was that android's problem?" Lisa asked, before turning to face Amy. "Well, Balloon Breasts, are you." Before Lisa could finish her sentence, Amy rushed right up to her and kicked her at least fifty feet into the air! ".ready?"
          "I've been ready for this moment for the past eight chapters!" Amy cried. "I really, really don't like fighting at all, but there's too much of my dignity at stake here to back down now! Now fall back down here and let's finish this!"
          "Finish?" Lisa repeated, translocating out of sight and appearing beside Amy, generating a fire ball in her hand. "This has only just started!" Before Amy could move, a blast of fire flew from Lisa's hand and hit Amy's legs, toppling her over.
          "Hey! That hurt!" Amy cried.
          "Well, I hate to agree with Veggie here, but it's not exactly gonna be a tea party and cookies, you know!" Lisa replied, throwing another fireball at Amy. Squealing in panic, Amy crouched to the floor with her hands pushing her head down, allowing the ball to fly past her completely and head toward the audience. Or, in particular, a certain Saiyan who had just arrived.
          "Stop calling me Veggie!!!" Vegeta scowled, just in time to see Lisa's fireball heading straight toward him. "Crap." The resulting explosion sent Vegeta flying back and bouncing off the walls, but didn't damage anyone else in any way. Back to the fight!
          "Are you trying to KILL me here?!" Amy cried.
          "Nope!" Lisa replied, grinning. "Just trying to beat the crap out of you! At least you're a nice big target!" Amy frowned. She knew Lisa was trying to get at her in order to make her fight. Now it was time to see how much this "training" had paid off.
          "Eat THIS!" she yelled, plunging a fist into the pit of Lisa's stomach, and then blasting her backward with a MizuGeki attack! "As big as I am, I still won't prove an easy target!" Lisa took a few seconds to regroup and stagger up to her feet, but she wasn't about to give up yet!
          "Well then, I'll have to make sure I'm not easy to hit either!" Lisa called, lunging at Amy and kicking her into the air again. This time, Lisa jumped up after Amy and grabbed her foot.
          "No! You're not throwing ME around, Lisa!" Amy yelled, kicking her back.
          "Hey, what are you trying to do, kick my eyes out!?" Lisa yelled back. "Try dodging THIS!" Lisa began kicking at Amy as fast as she could, which resulted at up to 166.66667 kicks per second (Ten thousand kicks a minute)!
          "How about I counter instead!?" Amy began punching as fast as she could, not nearly as fast as Lisa but since Amy's attack used two limbs and Lisa's only used one, she still managed to counter each blow! Pretty soon, both girls got tired and fell back to give themselves a rest.
          "How about we take a break for a while, Amy?" Lisa asked.
          "Hey, you actually used my name.." Amy gasped.
          "Break's over!" Lisa called, leaping (or as best as one can while hovering in the air) back into action!
          "Wait!" Amy cried. But she was too late. Lisa had already kicked Amy even higher into the air! From a spectator's point of view, it was getting increasingly harder to see Amy and Lisa as their bout increased in altitude!
          "Where are they going!?" Bulma asked.
          "From the looks of things, Lisa's punching Amy higher and higher!" Chichi added. "How can the poor girl stand such torture?" Up in the air, Amy must have been wondering the same thing.
          "Lisa, the air's starting to get thinner." Amy sighed in between blows.
          "That's a good point: How far up are we?" Lisa asked, ceasing her onslaught. Amy drifted back, holding her stomach from multiple hits.
          "I never thought I'd say this, but I kinda wish I hadn't eaten so much candy now." Amy moaned, rubbing her stomach.
          "Wow! We're really high now!" Lisa cheered. "The arena looks so tiny! But no time for that now! I have a battle to win, Balloon Breasts!" Lisa prepared to blast another fireball at Amy, but for some reason, no form of a flame was existing. Lisa couldn't understand it. no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get any fire to appear at all! "Hey, what gives? Why won't my fire work?"
          "Maybe it's because there's a lack of oxygen up here?" Amy asked. "But water already HAS the oxygen it needs, so take one of these!" Amy blasted a stream of water down on Lisa the same way Goku would use a Kamehameha, blasting her back down to Earth! "At least now you won't experience the problem of the arena looking so small any more." and with that, Amy flew back down in pursuit.

          "So, who do you reckon is winning?" Sarah asked.
          "It's really hard to say." DJ replied. "They've never gone at it like THIS before."
          "Hey, I think one of them's coming down!" Gokan called. "Is it Amy, or Lisa?"
          "It may be Amy," Zeon replied. "It's clear that Lisa's got the stronger fighting spirit."
          "No, wait!" D-Chan cried out. "It looks like whoever it is has been hit by water! And Amy wouldn't hit herself with her own attack! So, that means."
          "That means Lisa-chan could be in BIG trouble!" Zori cried. "If she hits the ground, she'll be killed!"
          "If she lands on her head, yeah." DJ said. "But Lisa NEVER does that." Sure enough, Lisa spun into a somersault and landed on her feet, albeit experiencing some VERY bad pain!!! Remember the fight between DJ and Zori where DJ nearly broke his legs? Lisa had just done an encore and now the water from Amy's attack was blasting her into the floor even more! Amy quickly flew down until she was about thirty feet away, and then gradually floated down to the floor.
          "You look like a drowned rat!" Amy laughed. "A drowned rat with Blitzballs stuck on its chest!" Lisa just snarled and shook some excess water out of her hair.
          "You may have had a head start, but let's see how you handle THIS!" Lisa gathered all the ki she could to increase to her Power Trigger state, but this time, something was different. Rather than just the usual Power trigger transformation, Lisa seemed to be emitting seven green lights from different places on her body. One light was shining from each of her ears, one for each of her wrists, one resting near her neck (like a necklace, or something), and one was shining near each of her ankles. Sometimes, it looked as though there were an eighth light shining, but it was impossible to tell for certain.
          "Umm. what are you doing?" asked Amy.
          "Becoming a more powerful form so that I can kick your busty butt in easier!" Lisa replied, smirking. The usual glowing and growing occurred as Lisa's Power Trigger initiation continued. As Lisa continued to grow, her tank top-type thingy didn't, and as the top rode up her torso ever so slightly, an eighth light was confirmed, shining from what seemed to be a jewel nested in her belly button. Then, in an eclipse of light, Lisa had changed not only her appearance (from regular to Power Trigger), but her attire had changed also! Rather than the usual blue jeans and blue tank top, Lisa was now wearing an orange body suit with an orange sleeveless jacket. Lisa also had a pair of earrings, bracelets, anklets, a necklace, and a jewel suspended where her belly button is: all made of Peridot. "What do you think to the NEW Power Trigger form?" Lisa asked, taunting Amy. Amy just smirked.
          "You think I didn't actually know about that?" she asked in reply. "Check THIS out!" Lisa realised what was about to happen now. Amy was about to do the exact same thing she just did in order to match or even exceed her power!
          "I won't even give you the chance!" Lisa called, and in a matter of milliseconds, she disappeared, reappeared behind Amy and kicked her to the floor.
          "This is turning out to be one of those days." Amy sighed, pulling herself up to her feet.

"Just how much more damage do you think Amy can take?" Angel asked as she watched the onslaught from the audience.
          "I'm not sure." Hawk replied. "Is there any way she'll stand a chance while Lisa's Power Triggered?"
          "Amy does have ONE chance," DJ explained. "If she can get one of Lisa's Peridot jewels away from her, then at least the enhancement of power to Power Trigger will diminish!"
          "You mean she'll still have all the strength, defence and agility of regular Power Trigger?" Sarah asked.
          "The situation doesn't look delicious for Amy." sighed a very hungry D-Chan.
          "OK, D-Chan." Krillin grunted as he staggered toward the group with at least seven hundred chocolate brownies. "Where do you want these!?" D-Chan began giggling with delight.
          "In my tummy, of course!" She chimed. Everyone else (except for DJ) just groaned at the sheer starkness of the situation.
          "That answer certainly was blatant." Hitomi sighed.
          "I think if she eats all that, it'll become BLOATANT." Xell added.
          "WHOA!?" gasped a very amazed Piccolo. "Holy crap! Lisa's on top of Amy!!!"
          "Piccolo! Tone the language down, will ya?!" Zeon probed. "Think of little Yuko!"
          "Sorry, but check it out!" Zeon looked at the arena. As Piccolo said, Amy was flat on her back, with Lisa straddled over her. "Sweet! It's gonna be a shoujo-ai story!"
          "There's no 'ai' about it!" Leanne cried. "Lisa's PUMMELLING Amy!"
          "Oh, my God!" DJ cried. "Hold on, Amy!" DJ tried to leap into the arena area to save his cute chesty companion, but he didn't get very far before Sarah, Leanne and Gokan grabbed him and pulled him back.
          "DJ, you can't go out there!" Sarah explained.
          "What gives?! Lemme go!" DJ yelled as he struggled to get free, but to no avail.
          "DJ, if you interfere, then you'll either be disqualified, or Miyamoto will beat you to a pulp, or both!" Gokan added.
          "I could take that scrap yard fodder any day!"
          "Well, think of it from Amy's point of view." Leanne said. "She wants to be able to hold her own against Lisa by herself. If you leapt in to help this time, her pride would be shattered!"
          "I know. but." DJ calmed down, knowing there was nothing he could do. ".Amy."

It was looking darker and darker for Amy as she sustained blow after crushing blow from Lisa.
          "This should be over real quick!" Lisa taunted. "Better get your measurements ready for that leotard!"
          "It's not over 'til the busty lady sings, and you've put me right off the mood for karaoke!" Amy screeched in reply, summoning the strength to kick Lisa away. As Amy did this, an explosion around her propelled Lisa further, but she managed to screech to a halt before even getting close to the arena's edge.
          "Whoa." Lisa could only gasp. "Did. did Amy cause that explosion? And if so, is she still alive?" As the dust cleared, Amy was nowhere in sight. Stood in her place, however, was a very tall woman with tanned skin and reddish-brown spiky hair, although she did have a little meatball thingy on each side. This woman had sets of jewellery identical to Lisa's, except in Ruby form, rather than Peridot, and a matching body suit and jacket, but in an azure blue this time.
          "Silly Lisa. of COURSE I'm alive." she said, coolly, yet cutely. "Let's finish this, shall we?"

          "WOW!!! That's Amy in her Power Trigger stage!?" Zeon cried out. "She is HOT!!!!"
          "Let's hope her fighting is as impressive as her looks!" Piccolo added.
          "Typical males." Leanne sighed. "They're head over heels in love with Amy just because now that she's bigger in general, her boobs are bigger too."
          "Actually, Amy's chest remains the same size, even in Power Trigger." DJ explained.
          "Hee-eeeyy." Sarah cooed, taunting DJ. "You must have really been staring, huh?" DJ felt an immense blush crossing his face, and he sank low into his chair.
          "Leave me alone." he finally sighed.

Back on the arena floor, Lisa had become frozen in shock. She had honestly never seen Amy in Power Trigger form before. Amy had always looked too cute to be taken seriously in a fight, but now she was actually quite intimidating. And the fact that Amy's element base had an advantage over Lisa's didn't exactly help! Finally, the tension got to Lisa and she knew that if she didn't do something, she'd be attacked and defeated for sure!
          "I'm not just gonna stand around here and let myself be afraid of you!" She yelled as she stood up. "You may look powerful and intimidating now, but underneath that exterior you're STILL just Amy: the shy girl with the Titanic Ti-"
          "You don't want to finish that sentence." Amy intervened. Without any other clue of how to handle the situation, Lisa just started throwing fireballs at Amy like there was no tomorrow! With Amy's size, plus the increased size due to Power Trigger, she wasn't hard to miss. In fact, only three out of fifty fireballs flew by, hitting the wall behind her. Despite this, Amy just remained where she stood, having not moved an inch.
          "H-h-h-h-... HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE!?" Lisa cried. Amy just smiled, sweetly.
          "My turn." She said, rushing behind Lisa and kicking her directly in the back. Before Lisa could fly forward, Amy grabbed her shoulders, preventing her from moving. The momentum caused the Peridot nested in Lisa's belly button to fly out and roll across the floor. As though to add a symbolic effect of drama, Lisa's transformation reversed the instant the Peridot stopped rolling and fell to the floor. "That's enough toying with you. This is where you go for a cold bath!" Amy lightly pushed Lisa away, but of course, it was only lightly in Amy's current power relation: her effortless shove was enough to send Lisa halfway across the arena! Lisa wasn't about to take this without a fight. She still had another trick she could use: now that she was back on Earth, Lisa's HinoGeki attack would have the oxygen it required to activate! But as soon as Lisa turned around she was frozen in fear. Only she and Zori knew what was coming as five swirling circles of water floated in front of Amy. If she activated Aquanihillation and it hit, Lisa may as well have just given up from the start! But she wasn't about to let this happen. No way, no how.
          "You're not getting ME with that trick!" Lisa called, rushing toward Amy.
          'That's it, you overconfident misguided fool.' Amy thought. 'Just a little closer.' Just as Lisa reached a seven foot radius from Amy, she violently pushed all five water circles forward, sending a drill of water crashing into Lisa!
          "Hah! I bet that's cold, isn't it, Lisa?" Amy taunted. "I'll send you on your way to tell the leotard designer YOUR measurements!" Amy aimed her Aquanihillation attack toward the ground, blasting at Lisa's feet and causing her to lose her footing.
          "Crap!" Lisa cried as she fell face-down, and was then washed backward, off the arena floor and into the corridor of one of the exits! A loud bang filled the sky, and Amy saw that as her cue to impede the attack.
          "Phew!" Amy sighed, sweetly, wiping a thin layer of sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand. "That was fun! We should do that again sometime!"
          "There is NOOOOOOOOOOO getting outta THAT one, folks!" Miyamoto called. "That weather balloon chested girl has just won the match!" Before another word could be said, a powerful jet of water blasted Miyamoto away.
          "You're not allowed to make fun of me either!" Amy scowled.
          "Wow! In what must be the biggest comeback we've seen, Amy wins!" Bulma cheered.
          "Yay! She beat the girl who beat up my darling Goku and Gohan!" Chichi added. "The next bout will be between Zori and Zeon!"

Two minutes later, the gang were back in the food courts, where Amy was chowing down on all her favourite desserts to celebrate her victory. In the opposite corner, a very large group of males were crowded around one area in particular.
          "Gee, I wonder what all those guys could be staring at?" Amy giggled. Then, from the large group, up on top of a table stood Lisa, wearing a bright red skin-hugging leotard which now shared the same colour as her face!
          "SHUT UP!!!!!" Lisa cried, causing Amy to suffer another giggle fit.

Well, it's taken a month, but chapter 18's finally done. I plan to get more fights done in chapter 19, because lately it's been one fight lasting a whole chapter. Besides, I'm starting to run out of humorous excuses for disclaimers.