Okay, another chapter. Whew, it took me a while to write this one. It's pretty angsty and memory-lane-y, and symbolic, but I think u'll like it. I credit Nickleback and Three Days Grace to helping me write this chapter.

Nicola

Chapter Twelve: Two Hearts, Two Loyalties

Kaede nestled into the curve of Sasuke's arm as he pulled her closer to him. It was night, and they were high up in a tall tree, leaning against the thick trunk. Kaede could feel the bark through her shirt, but was distracted from its rough feel by the sound of Sasuke's heart beating right by her ear.

She closed her eyes halfway, drowsy and content.

After Sasuke had come to get her, he had explained that they would be staying in the woods tonight, a ways away from Konoha. And after that, he'd been silent, and Kaede hadn't dared to break his reverie. He was probably thinking of how they would pull this off, and how much it would hurt to have to leave her again.

While Kaede's mind might have been in complete bliss, her heart beat in confusion. She was utterly ecstatic to be with Sasuke again, and to be spending time with him, yet she couldn't help but wonder how everyone was getting along knowing that she was out here doing one of the biggest "missions" for the village. She swallowed hard, unconsciously trying to swallow the feeling of guilt that came with betraying her village in such a vile way. She was doing this all for herself, not for them. What kind of a person does that to the home, and the people, they love?

Sasuke must have felt her shifting nervously, though she tried in vain to keep still, because he moved his hand to the back of her head and stroked her hair comfortingly, not comfortable with speaking. She chewed on her bottom lip, still preoccupied by her curious inner battle.

"You know," Kaede finally said, after searching for a long time for the right words to begin with. "For the last years, I've waited and waited for you, keeping that image of you in my head wherever I went. You smiling at me from behind the newspaper, teasing me during training, kissing me then turning away. What was all that for? Where did all that go?" She shifted to the side and looked up into Sasuke's face, at his black eyes staring down at her. "You and I used to fight side by side for Konoha, used to be right with each other. I didn't understand what had I done to make it all go away." She felt the tears coming, but the long years of being by her and struggling with her emotions had made her strong, and she was able to push the tears away.

"Kaede, you didn't—" Sasuke began, but Kaede interrupted him.

"No, I didn't do anything. It was you." Her anger was beginning to surface, and she fought to keep it down. "You strung me along like a little puppy on a leash, knowing that you were eventually going to go over to Orochimaru. I should've seen that your loyalties didn't lie with Konoha. I should've realized that you were going to leave and run off to seek power. Well, you've got it. So why did you take me back? Why did I take you back?"

Sasuke showed no sign of emotion other than the slight tightening of his jaw. Kaede saw this, and bristled, ready for a smack, punch, scream, mutter, anything. But none of it came. He just sat there, staring straight ahead of him, his clenched fists shaking. She looked down at her own hands, lying in her lap as limp as a dead man's. She, too, was weak and infuriated, but more so at Sasuke's decision making skills than her own rampage.

The minutes ticked by slowly, more slowly than ever Kaede had felt them move, and neither she nor Sasuke made any indication of speaking. She had moved over to the other side of the branch, just staring at the bark and occasionally picking at it to release her anger. Her eyes shot back and forth along the little white speckles and lines cutting into the brown tree surface. Never did they stray upwards, where no doubt she would meet Sasuke's dark, ominous gaze.

The night wore on, and it seemed like an infinity before the sun rose, before Kaede realized how fatigued she felt, and how getting no sleep definitely interfered with her physical limitations. As she stood to stretch her legs, she came face to face with Sasuke's chest, then his chin, and finally, looking up, his eyes. He was staring down at her with this odd look in his dark orbs, something that made Kaede's heart twinge and stomach curl.

It was…guilt.

As she stared into the unfamiliar emotion plaguing Sasuke, Kaede wrung her hands together nervously. Whatever was coming, she could tell it would make a huge change in their relationship.

"I'm…oh, Kami, I can't say this," Sasuke began, running a hand through his black hair and darting his gaze downward before looking back up. "I'm sorry, okay? I don't know what I did to make you think that I'm such a horrible person, but whatever it was, I'm sorry for it."

Normally, when in better feelings towards him, Kaede would've forgiven the Uchiha. But the way he worded it, and since she was still pretty mad at him (holding a grudge, of course), she couldn't.

"I'm not going to forgive you," she said in a low voice. "Naruto told me to do something for myself for once, and I was willing to give us a try. But this isn't working. I love you to death, Sasuke, and I figured that I'd do anything to keep us together." Her voice cracked, and she cleared her throat before continuing. "There is no way in hell that I am going to be with you anymore. You're loyalties lie with the complete opposite of what I thought they were when I first started to love you. Now I see. There's no bringing you back to us. You can help out in this war as much as you like. But you'll always be on his side, not ours. I don't care how much you protect me, I don't want it. I'm leaving, and I'm going back to the people I care about."

Staring in shock, Sasuke watched as Kaede turned to leave, then stopped and looked back over her shoulder.

"I love you, Uchiha Sasuke," she said in a low voice, obviously fighting back tears that threatened to fall. "But I can't be with you anymore. You're not the person I thought you were."



Kaede rubbed her arms and shivered, not knowing why she was cold, or where she was for that matter. If she had to guess, she'd say it was around noon, maybe later, and that the entrance to Konoha's underground hideaway was apparently not where she'd thought it was.

Okay, she knew where it was—there was no way she could have forgotten—but for some reason, she couldn't find it! She'd left Sasuke in the wake of her little outburst, and damn, had it felt great. Yet now, all she wanted was for him to be here to show her the way home. Or, rather, what was left of it.

What was left of Konoha…She sighed, and stopped her useless walk through the woods. There was no reason she should keep on going in the completely wrong direction. And there was a reason to turn around. A mischievous grin crept across her face at the thought now entering her mind. Spinning on her heel, she leapt into the trees and dashed in the opposite direction.

Her destination wasn't too far off—she may not be able to find the entrance to the hideout, but there was one place she knew she could find even if blinded. It was almost like a sixth sense of sorts, something she was proud of and that every other ninja was proud of. It was the ability to find their way home, even in the direst of situations, even when completely lost.

Her feet carried her subconsciously as she mentally prepared herself for the destruction and doom she was most likely going to find. Her old village home was probably in ruins, thanks to Orochimaru. She wouldn't be surprised to find that none of the remaining people remembered her face, or if there were any remaining people from the original crop that had been left behind in the battle.

The danger of what she was doing was definitely in the back of her mind; the only thing she was thinking was getting home and seeing what Orochimaru had done. She could already feel her anger boiling to the surface, and quickly calmed the tempest. It wouldn't help if she were upset and fuming when she entered the village. Hell, half of her didn't expect to even get beyond the gates. If she did, it would be a miracle, and even more so if she wasn't caught by guards and killed.

It wasn't long before she found herself within sight of Konoha. Without her headband, she looked just as plain and normal as everyone else, and if she was thinking correctly, the guards probably had no idea what the former Hokage of Konoha looked like. She took a deep breath, and jumped down from the trees, mere feet in front of the two bored-looking Sound ninja.

Their eyes darted over her quickly, but not so quickly that she didn't notice their careful scrutiny, and she smiled nervously. Inside, though, she was yearning to attack them and wipe those smug looks off their faces.

"Who are you and what is your business in the Sound village?" the one on the left, the chubbier one, asked. Kaede swallowed before answering.

"I'm a mere roaming peasant, and I'd heard so many wonderful things about Lord Orochimaru and his wonderful village, that I figured it would be a fine place for me to settle down," she said innocently, as innocently as one with a grudge bigger than the world could say anything. She could tell they were falling for it.

The one on the right, the skinny, tall one, nodded slowly. "We've been getting a lot of the likes of you around here lately. Lord Orochimaru said to go ahead and let you all in. You may pass."

Elation filled Kaede as she saw the gates slowly open, but as soon as she'd taken a step towards the opening, the taller ninja grabbed her shoulder. Fighting the urge to grab his filthy hand and throw him into the trees, she turned.

"Yes? Is there something you need for me to enter?" she said politely, hating the bitter taste the words brought to her mouth.

"What's your name?" the guard asked, and Kaede racked her brains for a quick name. One popped into mind.

"Haruka Karin," she answered, and the guard took his hand off her shoulder. She walked through the gates, her eyes wide and her heart pounding in anticipation.

The streets looked gloomy and dark, the shops empty, the people forcibly cheerful as they greeted each other. They may be wearing smiles, but in their eyes, they were miserable. Kaede was shocked at the way her village was. There were no bright colors, the damage from the battle looked to have been badly repaired, the market was not full of people talking and laughing, and no one met another's gaze. Before the war began, you could catch smiles, waves, and hugs being given between two complete strangers. ANBU strode down the streets, talking about previous and future missions, all the shops were open, children darted in and around the crowds, pretending they were elite ninja taking down the bad guy.

Smiling at the mere memory of what her village used to be, Kaede tried to lock eyes with an elderly woman walking by. The woman met her gaze, but immediately looked back down to the ground at Kaede's friendly demeanor. Confounded, Kaede lightly touched the woman's arm. The elderly lady gasped and started, swinging around with pained eyes.

"What's wrong?" Kaede whispered, suddenly recognizing the woman as the one who ran—or used to run—the apple stand in the market. Her name was…oh, right. Aya. "Aya-san, what's the matter?"

Recognition lit up Aya's face and a smile broke out over her wrinkled features. Her eyes crinkled in pleasure and she looked around for a moment before pulling Kaede into a quick hug.

"Hokage-sama," the elderly apple saleswoman said joyously. "You've come back! Oh, I knew you would! You would never let us down. You're here to take back the village!" Thankfully, the woman was speaking in whispers, and the passing Sound nin didn't hear.

Kaede's heart twisted in the worst possible way. How could she have done this? How could she have come back and allow herself to be recognized? Of course the villagers would know who she was. Of course they would think that she was there to save them all. And she wasn't. It was a horrible thing to place false hopes in those who looked up to her, who had looked up to her for years and years, and still remained loyal.

"Soon, Aya-san," Kaede promised. "But not now." When the woman's face fell, Kaede placed a hesitant hand on her shoulder. "I'm alone, there is no one with me. I couldn't just leave you all behind and had to see what Orochimaru was doing. It was killing me knowing that some people didn't escape."

"Oh," Aya said pleasantly, "we've been getting along fine. There are several of us who like to meet and study the history of the Sound and how it came to be. If you understand."

Smiling even more, Kaede gave a firm nod. "I'll be gone in a little bit. I just want a look around, and then I'll leave. I promise you, this will all end."

As they parted ways without another gesture, Aya said over her shoulder in a voice almost too quiet, "We never did believe you were dead."

Heart warmed by the small reunion, Kaede continued to walk along the streets she knew so well. This time, compared to when she'd last roamed the roads, there were no children squealing, happy greetings, friendly bargaining, or casual shopping. There were only bustling men and women, subdued little ones, and angry-faced, brooding Sound ninja. No one was happy, no one was celebrating anything. Everyone was quiet, solemn, lost and hopeless. Kaede kept her eyes downcast as much as possibly, blending in with the others, staying indistinct. If another person recognized her and shouted it out, there was no way she would be able to get out of this alive.

Looming like an ominous cloud over the village was the Hokage temple, and inside, she knew was Orochimaru. Two and a half years ago, she'd been in the very office he was residing in. That was her office, no, used to be her office. The rightful one to be sitting in the comfortable desk chair in the room with the wall of windows was Naruto, and he was not there.

Gritting her teeth, Kaede forced her gaze away from the Hokage temple and down a side street she knew led to her parents' house. She had no way of knowing if they had survived or not. Kyoto and Tami seemed like far away figures in a life full of love, heartbreak, war, and death. Taking on another spur of the moment idea, she turned down the side street and walked up to the modest little house with the white front porch. It, too, had faded to an ominous shade of its previous color. What it had looked like before, Kaede was shocked to not recall, but it was there, and hopefully, so were her parents.

Hesitantly, she stepped onto the porch, raised her fist, and knocked on the door three times, her normal greeting. For several moments, there was no answer, and then the door slowly creaked open. The tiny clank of a door chain reached Kaede's ears, and she wondered why her parents would have such a thing. Then she remembered: they were in Orochimaru's world now.

As a hesitant eye peered out at her, Kaede saw that the brass doorknocker was no longer in place. Perhaps it had fallen off with age, she mused, but waited for whoever was in the house to take off the little copper chain and open the door completely. When they did, there stood Kaede's mother, Tami, looking drawn, tired, and amazed.

"Hey," Kaede said nervously, raising a hand in greeting. That hand was immediately grabbed and yanked inside, along with the rest of the former Hokage. She stumbled past the doorway and onto the carpet, vaguely hearing the door shut and the chain and locks go back in place.

As soon as she had caught her balance, she turned to face Tami. The dark-haired woman stared back, her eyes filling with tears. In a moment's time, she flung herself at her daughter and wept into her shoulder. Years of comforting those in the underground had taught Kaede how to deal with a distressed and crying person, but it was just so weird to have to comfort the mother she had never felt close to, much less hugged any time that she could remember.

"Oh, Kaede," Tami cried through her sobs. "We've been waiting for you to come home for so long." A tearstained face looked up and Tami sniffled. "Your father…he's not here any longer. Kyoto passed on during the battle, but I know how proud he was of you, seeing you fight for your village like you did. We all saw, but we couldn't do anything about it."

A strange feeling crept into Kaede chest as she awkwardly patted her mother on the back. She knew she should feel grief and loss for her father, but it wasn't there. Instead, there was guilt and even a little bit of happiness. She assumed the happiness was from learning her father was proud of her, even if they hadn't talked. It made her feel good that someone other than Kakashi or Sasuke was proud of her accomplishments.

Shoot, it was probably just Kakashi that was left to be proud of her now.

She felt Tami move away and followed the woman to the living room, where they both settled on the couch. She could tell that her mother had suffered greatly from the loss of her husband, her village, her friends, and her daughter. It must be helping to see Kaede again, even if she wasn't there to stay. Tami understood that.

"I know that you're going to be leaving soon, since it would be horrible for the Hokage to be caught in the middle of the enemy's country," Tami said. "But it's so wonderful to be able to see how you've matured over the years. I'd thought for a while you were dead, but you're not. There was always something—mother's intuition, I guess—that told me you were alive all this time. And it was right."

"I'm sorry I won't be staying," Kaede found herself apologizing, her hand moving itself to comfortingly grasp Tami's. "But I promise, we'll be out of this soon. A month, maybe, maybe a little longer." She wanted to beat herself silly for even uttering those words, as she knew it would be a long time, over a year, before they had a chance of taking the village back. But the look on her mother's face was worth the lie.

"Oh, good," Tami said, relieved. At least she would have some peace of mind for a little while. It was then that loud stomps on the stairs leading to the porch and banging on the front door sounded, and both of them jumped. "No, they're here to collect taxes. Honey, you have to leave. Through a window, the back door, anything. Just get out. If they find you here, you and I both will die." Tami moved and kissed Kaede's cheek lightly. "Go on."

Unnerved by the gesture but having no time to worry over it, Kaede dashed to the back of the house, flung open the back door, and sprinted out. It banged shut behind her, and she winced, knowing that the most likely scenario was her mother never coming out of that house alive. Her footsteps hit the ground silently as she headed down an alley, clambered over a low fence, and rushed back into the street. She slowed down to a walk, her pulse still pounding in her ears, and blended into the crowds.

She walked subconsciously down the street, weaving in and out of the throngs of people striding along slowly on all sides. They moved in a subdued manner that she just couldn't understand. Everyone had been so happy and pleasant before, and now they were just…solemn, grave, listless. There was no joy left.

Heart heavy, she found herself turning down another street and coming face to face with a rusted iron gate. Her fingers traced over the reddish surface, the familiarity of its feel astounding her, but not in the manner you would have thought. It was more of an astonishment that this part of the village was still uninhabited, still standing even. The lonely, eerily empty Uchiha district was there, shadowing its streets like a quiet reminder of days past. Kaede pushed open the gate and stepped onto the path she had traveled on so many times.

The houses seemed the same; all of them did, as always. She passed by house after house, trying to imagine the people who had lived in them before Itachi had murdered them all. She passed by the Uchiha symbol with the large crack in it from the kunai Itachi had thrown in a fury. The only reason she knew this was from Sasuke confiding in her one night. That had been a quiet, grave, somber night.

The house she had shared with Sasuke was just ahead, and she made a beeline for it, not sure what she was wanting to see.

After becoming Hokage, she had cleaned out most of the things inside, save for the furniture, a few sets of bedclothes, shirts, and pictures that were too tender to look at anymore. The front door opened easily, and she stepped inside, coughing a little at the dust stirred by her feet. Her footsteps made little prints in the thick layer of dust on the ground, and she made a silent reminder to stir up the dust some more before leaving so as not to leave a mark of her presence.

Her hand traced over the mahogany table standing solidly by the entrance into the living room, as her eyes scanned over everything in the dimly lit room. There was the couch, still there, and the coffee tables, and the shelves and cabinets. And on one of the shelves was a picture of Team 7 in their later years, taken several months before Sasuke had left.

She walked slowly over to it, picking up the framed photo gently and wiping at the dust with her thumb. Sakura, smiling brightly as she held onto a grinning Naruto's arm. Sasuke and herself, standing side by side. Sasuke wasn't smiling, she realized with a small chuckle. Only her. She was holding his hand, but he didn't look too happy about it. Of course, he'd never been one for photographs.

Thinking of Sasuke's reaction to pictures brought a surprisingly clear memory to Kaede's mind, and she set the framed picture back down and hurried into the bedroom she'd shared with the Uchiha.

In her old closet, she dug around and found the photo album she'd been looking for. Carefully, she sat down on the bed and opened the cover. It creaked slightly with age and little use, but opened nonetheless. She flipped through photographs of herself and Sasuke, Naruto and Sakura, and Kakashi even, until she came to the last page that held a single large photograph.

It was one of Sasuke, one that Kaede had captured of him when he wasn't paying attention, when he was just being himself. He was standing on the back porch, leaning on the wooden railing, the breeze just slightly blowing his hair from his face. His headband was not on, and his eyes had a faraway look to them. Kaede knew that at sunrise, the particular time this photo had been taken, he liked to think about his brother, his family, what had happened. She never disturbed him, only that one morning, and he had threatened her with her life that if she ever showed that photo to anyone, he would murder her, personally.

She smiled again and tore the page out of the book. She tucked it under her shirt and into the tight waistband of her pants for safekeeping. Looking at the picture had caused her to make her mind up, and there was something she wanted to do.

Her heart in her throat, Kaede gathered up a few more pictures of Sasuke and placed them on the ground in the middle of the street. She built up a little bit of chakra and blew fire through her fist in a little burst, just as Sasuke had showed her to in case of an emergency and she needed to build a fire. The pictures lit on fire and the flames licked them, singing them. They curled into little black crisps and lay there, sizzling on the dirt. Kaede felt a tear slipping down her cheek. She touched the picture under her shirt, and kicked dirt into the fire, putting it out.

She turned, the tears finally flowing freely, and began to walk away from the exit back into the main part of the village. She was sobbing uncontrollably, and fought to stem the flow. It was hard, as she kept thinking of the pictures she had burned, and how hard it was to let go. But it was something that had to be done to let herself loose from bonds she'd had with Sasuke.

Just as she was calming down and beginning to come to terms with what she had just done, someone grabbed her from behind and yanked her into another abandoned Uchiha house. She went to cry out, but that person's hand went over her mouth and held her close. She wriggled and thrashed, and yet all her efforts were futile.

When she was finally let loose, all prepared to scream, that someone kissed her on the lips. Fury built up inside of her chest, and she shoved him away.

"Is that your favorite entrance or something, Uchiha? Cause it's getting really old, really fast," she snapped at the black haired Orochimaru loyal grinning down at her. Sasuke lifted his chin in greeting and tucked a lock of her brown hair behind her ear.

"Did you think anyone wouldn't recognize you, Kaede?" he said smoothly, and she bristled, smacking his hand away from her.

"What do you want? I told you I didn't want to have anything to do with someone whose loyalties lie with the dogs," she growled, clenching her fists and shoving them into Sasuke's chest with just enough force to send in backwards a step. He quickly held his balance and forced his face blank.

"You said yourself that you love me," he said quietly, his black eyes boring into her hazel ones. He was advancing on her, and like the lovesick puppy she'd once been, she was falling for it, standing in place as he leaned closer until their noses were millimeters apart. "You said yourself that you would do anything for me. Well, you have. You left your village, you're a betrayer, just like me." Her little crush-caused trance was vanishing quickly, and she felt herself growing angrier and angrier. That is, until Sasuke's hand grabbed hers and their fingers entwined together.

He held her hand up to his mouth and kissed it gently, and she fought back a chill threatening to creep up her spine.

"Where is this going?" she said, finding that her voice was wavering. She hated this hold that he seemed to have over her.

"It's time for me to return the favor," Sasuke said, obviously ignoring her last comment. "I can help you stage an attack on the Sound village, unknown, unexpected, one that will let you gain back the village, and reclaim it rightfully as Konoha."

Astonished, Kaede backed away a step and studied Sasuke's serious face. He looked completely set on this idea, she realized. After years of being with him, living in the same house as him, he was almost like an open book to her. Sure, there were chapters she had never seen, and would probably never see considering their current trust issues, but she still knew what he was thinking most of the time.

"You're for real about this," she said, not as a question, but a statement. Slowly, she nodded, lightly tapping her chin as she thought. There was no reason why she should trust Sasuke with anything, especially not with her village and its people. Why should she let him take the reins away from Naruto? Why should she take his word and allow him to assist them? He could be playing them into a trap. His loyalties lay with Orochimaru, not Konoha. There was no evidence to show he was speaking the truth.

"Sasuke," she said slowly, as if testing the name. "I can't trust you. You're on Orochimaru's side, not ours. I'm sorry, but it's not going to happen. We can do this on our own, without you."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Sasuke replied, moving closer and reaching up, touching her face. "Because I'm not the person you think I am. I may be working for Orochimaru, but there is nothing to keep me from not loving my village. Konoha is my home, it holds my friends, my past, my family, and I will not let it go."

Yay! I loved the ending. But don't worry, it's no where near being the end. We still have two and a half more years to go before the final attack on the Sound by Konoha. And as soon as this story is finished, I'll write another one. Whenever u all review (please do!!!), give me ideas on a story you would like to read, and I will gratefully take the one that stands out the most to me and write it.

Thanks

Love ya

Nicola