Chapter 15
Martha awoke the next morning feeling sad and alone. She rolled onto her side and watched as Carl slept beside her. She felt a pain in her heart as she thought of the evnts from the night before. She hadn't wanted for things with Jack to go that far, but they did. Now she felt more alone than ever. Sure, she had Carl and the baby, but what happens when things get a little rough with Carl? Or they have a row and she just needs a shoulder to cry on, who would she turn to?
Sure, she had other friends, but none of them knew her like Jack did. He knew everything about her. From the day they met, they spent little time apart.
Suddenly feeling saddned, Martha climbed from the bed and walked into the bathroom. She closed the door, locking it so Carl wouldn't walk in if he got up. She stared at her reflection in the mirror above the sink. Her face was pale, making the redness of her eyes stand out and her hair hung, lifeless, over her shoulders. She turned the cold tap on and cupped water into her hands, splashing it across her face. The coldness from it sent a shiver down her spine. She swung her head back up and patted her face dry with a towel.
She placed her hand on her stomach. It seemed weird to think there was another life inside her. A life that depended on her. That needed her. She rubbed her stomach gently and smiled. Everything that was going on around her seemed to disappear when she thought about the baby.
She and Carl had never discussed children, although she was unsure of whether it was because they were both afraid of bringing the subject up, or because it wasn't something she thought either of them would ever want. But now they had it and, if the truth be told, Martha was excited. She knew it was a long way of, she hadn't even told Carl yet, but that was something she would do in her own time.
Everything spun around in her head. Her immeadiate reaction to discovering she ws pregnant was to confess her one stand with Jack to Carl, but she couldn't bring herself to tell him. Every time she opened her mouth, she just couldn't seem to find the words and had ended up saying something like she wanted to go out for a meal, or she wanted to visit some friends.
She knew she had to tell him eventually but, deep down, she didn't want to. Alhtough it pained her to admit it, sometimes she just wanted to be alone. Just her and the baby. The rest of the world would fade away. It would be just the two of them. But this was real life, and it was something you couldn't avoid.
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A knock on the door snapped her back to reality. 'You OK babe?' she heard Carls voice speak. Martha smiled. 'Yeh, I'm fine. I'm coming' she called back. Turning to the mirror, she gave her reflection one last look and sighed. 'Here goes' she said. Slowly she opened the door and came face to face with Carl.
'Whoa, you OK? You don't look to good?' he asked, placing a hand on Martha's shoulder. She took a deep breath. 'Yeh, I'm OK...I think.'
'You think?'
'Yeh. The truth is, I have something to tell you'...