Chapter 11 – Do Not Disturb

The plane ride could not have been longer. We had a 2 hour layover in LA which consisted of everyone laughing and talking and me sitting off in a corner by myself wondering why i'm putting myself through this hell. I knew it was gonna end up like this. So why did I come? I'm not even sure myself. Maybe b/c there's possibly that little hope that Lucas and I can work things out. I know it's a long shot, but what the hell, I've got nothing better to do.

When we finally were able to board the plane bound for Honolulu I was stuck sitting next to this older guy who did nothing but talk. I ignored him until he eventually got quiet. I spent that plane ride listening to my IPOD drifting in and out of sleep hoping this trip would magically get better.

We landed in Hawaii around 3 and headed straight for the hotel. It was actually a very nice hotel, more-so because it was beachside. It was peaceful just opening the window and staring out at the ocean waves crashing on the beach. But theres always a downfall isn't there? I'm rooming with the one person that won't even look at me. The one person who makes my heart skip a bit just hearing his name. And forget looking into his eyes. I get weak in the knees and short of breath. If only he knew how bad this was hurting me.

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I took a walk on the beach shortly after getting settled in the room. I needed the fresh air and change of scenery. I couldn't stand to look at that brooding blonde anymore. He just sat on his bed without saying a word or even looking my way. I watched a little of TV and drew some, then decided it was time to get out. I figured he needed some space so before leaving I made sure to check for another room and see what they had open. I was in luck. They had one room open on the front side of the hotel on the third floor. Everyone else was up on the 10th floor. I decided to wait for Lucas to leave the room before I went back and grabbed my stuff and moved into the new room.

Right now it seemed like I was on this trip by myself. No one was talking to me or even making an attempt to talk to me. Am I really that horrible of a person that they would all ignore me and push me to the side on the trip we all planned together? It's like none of them can stomach being around me. This whole situation just makes me sad. I've been through so much this past year and all I need is for my friends to be there, and they can't even do that. Is it because of Lucas? I really wish I knew. Deep down in my heart I know if I really need them they'll be there for me, but right now there not really showing it.

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I look down at my watch and realize I need to get back and get my stuff and move it into my new room. I slide my card and push down the handle and slowly walk in. Looks like a picked a great time to do it. Lucas is gone. I walk towards my bed and sit down and pull out a piece of paper and jot down a quick note for Lucas. Not really sure if he'll care but I figure I should at least explain why I'm leaving. I quickly grab what little stuff I had pulled out and stuff it all in my bag. I walk to the door and look around once more before walking out and heading towards my new room.

I walk in and set my stuff down and plop down on the bed. I release a heavy sigh before curling up under the covers and cutting on the TV. I get tired of flipping through the channels and realizing nothing is on. I cut it off and lay there for a few minutes before I slowly drift off to sleep.

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Lucas walked into his room around 1 o'clock the next morning. Stumbling through before finally reaching his bed. Rolling over his face meets a neatly folded piece of paper. He picks it up and throws it on the table beside him. Too drunk to care what it is he'll deal with it in the morning. All he cares about right now is sleeping without being interrupted by Peyton in the morning. He didn't understand how his heart could ache every time she was around or how his breath caught in his throat every time he saw her, yet at the same time he couldn't stand to be around her.

When she left earlier he felt bad, as if he knew it was his fault she felt so alone on this trip. In fact he knew it was his fault. He had told Nathan, Haley, and Brooke all about their ordeal and what had happened when he went to her house that night. He made it all out to be her fault when it was partly his fault as well. Her friends didn't agree with how she had been treating the guys in her life. Especially with what happened to Nathan, but Nathan was the only one sticking up for her. He saw first hand what that kidnapping had done to her.

She wouldn't let any guy touch her without jumping. Every time they did she would end up crying and running off. They didn't see it like that. They saw it as her being scared and coping out. Nathan was that one true person in her life who really understood her and what she was going through. She needed support and she needed her friends to be there for her, but none of them had done that. They were all to caught up in themselves and their own hatred towards Peyton's ways to care that she was in a downward spiral.

Nathan wasn't the only one who knew what was going on. They all knew it. They were all too stubborn to get off that high horse and help her out though. Some part of Lucas actually felt bad for ditching her the way he did. But his heart couldn't take it. He was slowly falling in love with a girl that couldn't love him back. That's a pain that's indescribable.

There was a part of him that wanted to break down her barriers and open her up to love, but he felt like it was impossible. He had tried many times to get close to her. He was lucky if he could kiss her without her freaking out. He had gotten her to the point where he could hug her and she wouldn't tense up at his touch and he was slowly breaking those walls down. Then he got to the point where he couldn't do it anymore. He needed more and he wasn't getting it so he took away the only sense of normalcy she had for his own greed.

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I woke up the next morning around 8 or so. I couldn't sleep all that well. I had a lot on my mind and I just couldn't stop thinking about all of it. I decided right then that I needed to change the way I was. I needed to stop thinking about what happened to me and not let it ruin what's left of my life. It's taken to much away from me already and I'm not gonna let it take anymore from me. I guess losing the best guys in the world would make anyone want to change. But is it that easy? To just up and change the person that situation has made me, to change who I am as a person right now?

I jump in the shower to freshen up before heading to the lobby for some breakfast. As soon as I walk in I see Nathan sitting at a table playing with his food. I grab a cup of coffee and walk over to the table.

"Is it okay if I sit here?" I ask shyly

He nods his head and I take a seat in front of him. I stir my coffee for what seems like hours before he finally talks to me.

"Are you okay Peyt?"

I look at him like he has two heads. What is he talking about am I okay? Does he not realize what they're all doing to me by making me the outcast?

"I'll be fine Nathan." I look back down at my coffee and feel his intense stare.

"I think you're lying. I know you better than that."

I look at him harshly. He has no right to start acting like he cares now when he hasn't said more than two words to me since we first boarded that plane in Raleigh.

"Don't start acting like you care how I'm doing now Nate. None of you has even tried to talk to me since we got here. No I'm not okay. My friends hate me b/c of how I've been acting. Do you even realize what I've been through?" I keep my voice down so I don't attract attention but it's firm enough to let him know that upset about how I'm being treated.

He lowers his head in shame as he whispers the word no.

"I didn't think so" I whisper before walking off.

As I'm walking back to my room I see Haley and Brooke heading towards me. They brush right past me as if I don't exist. I feel tears start welling up in my eyes. I take a look back to see them walk right over to Nathan with attitude evident in there strides. I turn back and lower my head. I sniff back my tears and wipe my eyes as I board the elevator. I didn't realize that there was actually someone else on board until he spoke to me.

"Hey" he whispers "are you okay?"

I look up at him with tear filled eyes and nod my head. "I'll be fine" I force a smile before the elevator reaches my floor. Before getting off I look back at him. "Thanks for caring though" I spin on my heel and exit and walk towards my room. So much for changing how I've been acting.

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Lucas woke up the next afternoon with one hell of a hangover. Rubbing his head and throwing his legs over the side of the bed he realizes that last night probably wasn't the best time to drink. He was a little more than upset and that led him to drinking more than he should have. He went out with a couple girls he met on the elevator. He thought it was a good way to forget about Peyton but all it did was make him realize how much he missed having her around.

They were throwing themselves at him and he just acted as if nothing was going on. He sat at the bar downing beer after beer and ignoring there comments and the come-ons. His mind was elsewhere and they never even knew it. They were just as drunk as he was, if not drunker. Every comment he made that they thought were about them, was a comment he made about Peyton. How beautiful she was, and how smart and talented she was. How her smile could light up a dark room, and how her eyes hold the secrets of her world.

When he woke up he never would have thought he'd be in a room by himself with no sign of her whatsoever. Her bed was made, her pillows were straight, her suitcase was gone. And thats when he remembered the paper that was laying on his pillow when he got home this morning. He frantically looked around the room trying to find it. He spotted the now crumpled piece of paper on the bedside table. He slowly walked over to it, picked it up, and sat down on the bed.

He took a deep breath before opening it up and reading.

Dear Lucas,

I know that you don't want to hear why I'm being so standoffish, but I feel like you need to know. You were the first person I saw after I was free of those men. You took me in and kept me safe until the cops arrived, and you've been taking care of me ever since. It's extremely hard for me to trust you or any guy right now. In my mind it's like you could hurt me just like they did at any moment. You had a right to break things off, but I wish that you wouldn't have made all of my friends turn against me. I feel more alone now then I did when I was trapped in that house. That's not the best feeling to have. I moved out of the room so that you could have the space you wanted without worrying about me being there. I won't be on this trip much longer. I'll be trading in my ticket within the next 48 hours and heading back to Tree Hill. I hope you have a great trip. For whatever its worth... I really did like you. I still do.

Peyton Sawyer

Lucas folded the piece of paper up and sat it back down on the table. He let out a deep sigh and called the front desk.

"How may I direct you're call?"

"Peyton Sawyer please"

"I'm sorry sir. Ms. Sawyer has asked to not be disturbed."

"Oh. Well thank you anyways."

Lucas sat back on the bed, his mind racing. He had to find her. She couldn't leave thinking that he didn't care about her at all.

Ok so theres your next chapter. Within 24 hours as promised. I hope everyone that is reading is enjoying it. I'm gonna try and get out another chapter tonight. I'm working on it now. Please Please Please leave a review and let me know what you think. Feedback is welcomed.

LOVE SHELL

Special Thanks to Matt who reviewed on my last chapter. I'm glad you liked it!