Ok, so this chapter took me a little longer than anticipated. Mainly because I kept being distracted by other amazing stories on the site. You guys have to stop writing such good stories, or else I'll never get anything done! That and an obscene amount of precalc homework is what I'm going to blame the delay on.

Sorry about the cliffhanger on the last chapter, you're right, I am evil. I realized just how evil after I posted the chapter. My bad, (mwa hahahahaha). Just in case you can't tell, that was my evil laugh. What? I thought it was good.:D

Anyways, so far I've got 34 reviews for the first two chapters. I'm sooo excited! Guys, you are completely fantastic and incredible!! Thanks so much to everybody who's read my story, and again especially to those who've taken the time to review it! Keep it up! I'm a review vampire, reviews sustain me!:P

Ok, I'll shut up now and let you read the next chapter, it's one in the morning and I'm freaking tired! Curses upon all math homework!!

Oh, and by the way, I don't own the Teen Titans.

Chapter Three. Here To Drown.

After Raven left, the only thing for Beast Boy to do was withdraw to his room. He'd talk to the rest of the Titans in the morning. He'd been avoiding this for far too long, should have told them when they first met. He hadn't wanted to though. There was no fun in having everybody pity him. Everything would have been different. Once people found out, they treated him differently, as though he was some kind of invalid, unable to take care of himself.

He'd talk to the Titans tomorrow, tell them everything. One more day wouldn't make a difference, whatever happened would happen whether or not he told his friends. Looking back, he was glad that they hadn't known. That they had always treated him as an equal, made him feel like he was a hero. Made him forget what would eventually come.

Tomorrow, he told himself, tomorrow I'll sit them down and tell them. I can't leave it any longer. Maybe I'll play some game station with Cy tonight. Kick some tin can ass! I could show Robin some moves, train with him for a while. Dude, that'll be sweet to show him up for once! Maybe I'll let him win one. I'll apologize to Star. She seemed kinda upset while she was trying to beat down my door. One more normal night, then I'll tell them.

In a slightly better mood at the thought of his evening's plans, he decided that holding off telling them one more day wouldn't hurt. He'd already told Raven enough. Maybe not everything that he would have liked to tell her, but it was a pretty damn good start. Smiling to himself at the memory, he sprawled across his bed. I hope I didn't freak her out. As the thought crossed his mind he frowned, trying to remember her exact reaction.

Had she flinched slightly when he had hugged her? Maybe a little, but she'd relaxed after a moment. After that, he didn't remember much about it except that she was there, she was his, just for a few minutes. She'd felt so solid, so comforting, so strong. Nothing could happen to him while he was with her. He'd breathed in deeply, cherishing her scent, the smell that sent shivers down his spine.

No, even though she'd been the one to break the contact, Beast Boy didn't think that she'd been freaked out by it. He almost dared to think that she'd enjoyed it. Almost dared to think that it could happen again.

As he replayed the memory over and over again, he didn't notice that patches of fur, feathers, and scales were randomly errupting and dissappearing all over his body.

He didn't notice that something was wrong until it was too late. Too late to go for help. By the time he realized what was happening, he was gripped by a stronger wave of dizziness than any he had previously experienced.

"Help," he tried to shout, knowing that nobody could hear him. His voice was merely a croak. Attempting to reach the hallway, he stumbled and fell amid the warzone that was his bedroom floor. His body was a mess of different creatures that rivaled his mess of a room. It wouldn't stop changing, he was losing control of everything.

NO!!! he screamed internally, Not yet, not now! I have more time, I have to!! I have to tell them, they have to know!!!! I have to say goodbye! By now fear had gripped every part of his being. He wasn't finished, wasn't ready. There was so much left that he had to do. He needed to-

He let out an agonized grunt as a bolt of pain seared through his entire body. This couldn't be happening. How could he have been so stupid? How could he have wasted so much time?

Beast Boy silently wished for his friends to come. He didn't want to be alone, not now, not here at the end. He felt like he was burning alive, the pain was consuming him. Why hadn't he told his friends? They'd be here now if he had. The morphing had stopped, leaving him gasping for air and reeling from pain. As he stared up at the ceiling, he saw that dark energy was seeping through the roof and into his room.

Raven. Something was happening to Raven, her powers were out of her control, threatening to destroy the tower. Threatening to destroy her.

It was him. He knew it. She knew what was happening to him. He could feel her inside of him, reaching out for an anchor, reaching desperately for somebody who could pull her back from the edge.

"Raven, no!" he cried, and using every ounce of strength within him, rose to his knees. He could feel her slipping, losing control, reaching for him. He wouldn't let her fall. He wouldn't let his fate be hers. Something flared up inside him, erasing all fear for himself.

It blazed through him, reaching back for her, pulling her from the brink of an abyss. The dark energy began to fade. Or was it getting stronger? The edge of his vision was becoming hazy; he couldn't tell if the darkness he saw was coming from Raven or not. The wild energy that had reached out for her faded, leaving him alone with the pain that coursed through his entire body.

He shuddered and fell forward, catching himself with his hands. The pain was too much, he couldn't take any more of it.

As he collapsed, as he faded away, he had one final thought.

At least I got to say goodbye to Raven.

He looked so small amidst the machinery that surrounded him. The stark white of the medical bay contrasted sharply with his green skin. As Cyborg ran tests on the blood he'd drawn from Beast Boy's arm, Robin anxiously paced the length of the small room. If the rest of them weren't so worried, they would have found the sight of their leader pivoting sharply every few steps amusing. Eventually he sat down with a thud, his quick succesion of 180 turns beginning to make the room spin.

Starfire was sitting cross legged on the bed next to Beast Boy, sniffling softly. Although she usually sat with perfect posture, she was slouched over now, eyes locked on her sick friend and the machines that monitered his condition.

Raven stood at the window on the other side of the room, attempting to completely center herself. Beast Boy's emotions were gone, and with them the chaos that they brought. Now she was left alone with her own emotions. She had to eradicate them, to leave them behind.

Azarath Metreon Zinthos, Azarath Metreon Zinthos, Azarath Metreon...she chanted silently to herself, not wanting to disturb the deafening silence in the room that was only broken by the monotonous beeping of the machines that were hooked up to Beast Boy. She could feel the grey curtain slowly descending over her, pushing away the darkness that had burst forth inside her when he had disappeared. It was better this way. It was better to be grey, to be empty, than to let the dark consume her. Sorrow, grief, anguish, fear, these were things she didn't need. These were colors that were best kept hidden away. Locked away, where nobody could reach them, where noone could touch them.

I'm not upset. I just overreacted because Beast Boy's emotions were too much for anybody to handle. I'm not upset. The grey was begining to thicken, to envelope the last rays of color that were struggling in protest to her denial.

Azarath...She had raced through the tower, Titans following her, to Beast Boy's room. They had shouted at her, asking what was going on, asking if she was ok, asking what was wrong with Beast Boy. She had ignored them, too busy trying to catch some glimpse of his fire, of anything.

She hadn't been able to.

Metreon...Robin had knocked on Beast Boy's door when they got there. It was pointless, Raven knew, but she hadn't trusted herself to speak. In the state that she'd been in, she'd been liable to destroy the tower accidentally.

There had been no answer. Of course. Starfire had ripped the door away from the wall, finishing her work from earlier that day by completely destroying it.

There he was. Raven played the scene back in her head, seeing him lying on his floor surrounded by garbage and dirty laundry, curled in a ball facing away from them.

Zinthos...She'd rushed over to him, followed closely by Cyborg, Starfire, and Robin. Using her powers to check him for signs of life, she'd found them. Shallow breathing, and a faint heartbeat, but he was alive. He'd been soaked in sweat, and shaking. She'd tried to heal him, tried harder than she'd ever tried before, but it was no use. Whatever his sickness was, it was too deep, it was stronger than she was. They'd taken him to the medical bay and hooked him up to all of those machines.

He didn't even look like himself anymore. He was lost among the winding tubes and wires. The mass of equipment rose and fell as he breathed. Raven looked away, fearing that the sight of Beast Boy like that would cause another tear in the already battered shroud of grey that she had cloaked herself in.

And now, with the others taking care of him, she could take a moment to examine herself thoroughly and regain the control that she had very nearly lost that day.

Lost In You.

"Dude," Beast Boy moaned, his eyes shut tight against a pounding headache. Groaning, he rolled over and found himself falling off his bed and onto the floor of his bedroom.

"Ouch." Sitting up, he rubbed his eyes and looked around, confused. The last thing he remembered was pain. And then darkness-Raven. Then there was...nothing. He must have passed out, but how did he get back up to his bed? Had the others put him there? No, if they had found him, they'd have taken him to the medical bay.

"Maybe I dreamt it all," he muttered to himself, running a hand through his hair. That would almost make sense. The more he thought about it, the more convinced he became that this theory was right. The entire day must have been a dream. Losing his powers, fighting Cinderblock without them-he would never do that, he'd never show the Titans that he could do that. And hugging Raven...she would never have hugged him back, that was definitely a figment of his imagination.

Beast Boy sighed. He'd almost rather have the entire awful day back then think that the embrace had merely been a dream. Oh well. He'd have plenty of time to tell Raven...everything. Grinning at the thought, Beast Boy stood and stretched his arms towards the ceiling. It felt like he was being given a second chance. He'd go and tell the Titans everything. They deserved to know. They deserved the chance to say goodbye, when it actually happened. The important thing was that it hadn't happened yet, he had more time.

"Goooood morning!" he boomed cheerily as he walked into the kitchen, and then stopped dead in his tracks. There was nobody there. Beast Boy blinked several times, staring stupidly at the empty room. I must be up early, he thought, blaming the dream that he'd had, I'll just go wake them up, it can't be too early. Looking at the digital clock on the stove, he saw that it was blinking at twelve o clock. The power must have gone off or something. He looked out the window and saw that the sun was already up and decided to risk waking up his friends.

First he went to Cyborg's room.

"Cyboooorg! Oh, Cybooorg! Cyborg," he shouted, knocking perhaps harder than necessary on his friend's door. Maybe his wake-up system got screwed up when the power went out, Beast Boy reasoned. He looked at the complicated computer that acted as a lock for Cyborg's door. These things used passwords right?

"If I were Cyborg's password, what would I be?" he asked the computer softly, trying to think what word Cy would use. Booyah? Too obvious. Ummm, Titans? No, that's stupid. Brother Blood? No, too bad-guyish. What about Stone? Meh, might as well try something. As he reached a final decision on what to type in as a password, he realized a crucial flaw in his plan.

The computer had no keyboard. It was just a screen built into the wall. Beast Boy prodded the screen gently, trying to figure out how to call up the on-screen keyboard. After several minutes, he hadn't gotten past the screen that said: Don't even try BB

"Screw this," the small green Titan muttered, frustrated by his lack of computer knowledge. Suddenly he disappeared from sight, having changed into a flea. He slipped underneath the door and changed back.

"Sorry Cy, but your computer thingy's broken, the keyboard's missing, and I had to-Cy?" he stopped, seeing that nobody was in the room. He must be working on the T-Car. Shrugging, Beast Boy made his way to Starfire's room. The door was open, as it often was. Poking his head in, he saw no sign that Star was in the room. Growling with frustration, he made his way to Robin's room, not expecting to find him there.

Nope. No Robin.

And now he was standing in front of Raven's room, holding his breath. This was dangerous territory, and he knew it. He knocked lightly on the door.

No answer. He knocked harder.

Nothing.

"Rae? Raven?" he called, "Are you in there?"

Still no reply.

"Raven! Are you there?" he shouted, this time much louder. Fed up with waiting for an answer, he opened the door. The room was dark, but that wasn't an issue for him. Squinting his eyes, he saw nobody.

"What the hell?" he yelled at the empty tower, "Where did they go?" He stormed downstairs, furious that all of his friends had left without so much as a note. Cursing them under his breath, he wrenched open the front door, ready to become a bird and scour the city for them. They were going to get a piece of his mind, it was one thing to ignore him, but it was an entirely different matter to-

BAM

"What the hell!!??" he said again, face numb from the impact. On the other side of the door there was...nothing. Instead of the usual ocean view, Beast Boy was confronted by a field of bright white light. Solid light, which he did not have the urge to run into again any time soon. Instead, he cautiously reached his hand out, and found that there was an invisible barrier that prevented him from leaving. Slamming the door shut, he ran to the nearest window. Looking through it, he saw the skyline of Jump City, but as soon as he opened the panel, the view was replaced by the white light. Panting, he raced through the tower, trying every opening he could think of and getting the same results with each one. He was trapped.

"Where am I?" he asked, knowing that nobody could hear him.

"I don't know guys. I just don't know," Cyborg stated in a defeated tone. He'd spent the entire night trying to figure out what was wrong with Beast Boy and had come up with nothing. There was a dark circle framing his biological eye.

"All of those tests and you didn't find anything?" Robin snapped, fatigue and frustration causing him to vent his anger on the nearest target.

"What did I just say?" growled Cyborg. The two glared at eachother furiously, each one trying to out-stare the other.

"Friends! Please, we must not argue," Starfire said forcefully, tears glinting in her large eyes, "We are all of us feeling the sadness, but we must not be mean to one another." Robin scowled and turned away from Cyborg.

"Starfire's right," came Raven's dull monotone from the corner. The other three looked up in surprise. Raven hadn't spoken since the night before on top of the tower. Since she'd directed them to Beast Boy's fallen form.

"Arguing won't help Beast Boy," she continued, "Cyborg, did you find anything at all that we could use?" Cyborg sighed and looked back at the computer screen that was displaying the results of the tests.

"Well...whatever it is, it's taking out his systems one by one," he replied, unconciously using technical terms to describe Beast Boy's organs, "and whatever it is, he's had it before. I wouldn't be surprised if it's been lying dormant inside him for years."

"I just-uh, tripped. On that rock over-um, well it's, uh it's gone...now, it's gone. Yeah. I tripped over it. I'm fine."

How could she have missed it?

Cyborg slammed his fist into the wall. "Why didn't we notice that he was sick? I should have known, he fell on his way out the tower this afternoon. He never falls like that. Somebody always pushes him. And his powers weren't working. This is all my fault." Cyborg was sitting now, his voice having become softer as he spoke.

"You can't just do...that and expect us not to notice. That was amazing Beast Boy."

"Oh, I agree. Never before have I witnessed such a magnificent display of combat, not even from the Warlords of Okaara!"

"Where did you learn how to do that?"

"Can we just go home? Please?"

How could she have been so stupid?

"This was nobody's fault Cyborg," Robin looked at the prone form of his teammate, "He's sick. There's nothing we could have done to change that."

"This can't be happening now. I need more time." At the time, she'd thought that Beast Boy had wanted her to leave. Now, looking back, Raven cursed her own blindness.

"Agreed Robin," Starfire put a comforting hand on Cyborg's shoulder, "Nothing that any of us could have done could have prevented this. We can not blame ourselves."

Looking back, Raven remembered something else, something that she'd heard but not really comprehended as she'd walked away from Beast Boy.

"Goodbye Rachel."

"He knew," Raven interrupted Starfire as she continued to comfort Cyborg. Raven stood and walked to Beast Boy. The others simply stared at her.

"He knows," she corrected herself, "Beast Boy knows what's happening to him. He knows exactly what's wrong. I think that he's known for a long time."

"I do not think I understand," a confused Starfire said. Robin and Cyborg looked at Raven, waiting for her to elaborate.

"He's been saying things," she explained slowly, working it out for herself as well as for them, "I went to his room last night, before I saw you up on the roof Cyborg. He was acting strange, even for him. He was acting like he'd never see me again." She didn't tell them about the embrace that they'd shared. The rest of the Titans didn't need to know that.

"Well, it would have been nice of him to tell us that yesterday," Robin said, frustrated, "As of now, his knowing what's wrong with him doesn't really help us to figure it out."

"Yes, actually, it does," Raven said, secretly pleased at the looks of surprise on her friends' faces.

"Please, explain Raven," Starfire asked, her request, as usual, sounding more like a command. When Raven didn't say anything, Star looked to Cyborg, who shrugged, and then to Robin.

"You can go into his mind," Robin replied slowly, Raven's plan dawning on him. Raven nodded, knowing that Robin was remembering the time when he'd let her into his own mind.

"Are you sure you want to?" Cyborg asked, attempting to lighten the sombre mood with a joke. He couldn't stand that they were all so depressed because of Beast Boy. He knew that the constantly laughing Titan would hate that. If there was one thing that Cyborg could say he knew about his friend, it was that making others smile was what made Beast Boy happy.

Raven's face became less stern, the equivelant of smiling for her. She appreciated what Cyborg was trying to do, but wasn't so sure if Robin did. To prevent another fight, she nodded again and spoke.

"This is, of course, assuming he has a mind," she replied dryly. Then, all joking aside, she explained to them exactly what she'd be doing.

"I can send my soul-self into his mind. My body will still be here, but I won't be, so if there's trouble, I won't be able to help. There's no way for you to bring me back. I'll come out when I come out, so don't bother trying to wake me," she said curtly. Robin nodded shortly, and looked to Cyborg and Starfire to make sure they understood.

"Say hi to him for me," Cyborg grinned, feeling better since they were doing something. He hated to feel helpless, to feel like there was nothing he could do to change what was happening. He hated being unable to help Beast Boy.

"And for me as well," Starfire said happily, already looking forward to Raven's return. The young alien was positive that Raven would be able to find out what was wrong with Beast Boy and figure out a way to heal him.

Cyborg helped her to clear out some of the tubes and wires that were hooked up to Beast Boy. Most of them had been there just for the tests, and when all of the excess machinery had been cleared, he looked a little closer to normal than he had just a few minutes prior. Raven eased herself gently underneath him so that his head rested in her lap. She put her hands against his temples, and almost withdrew them when she felt how hot his head was. His breathing became steadier as she held him, and his pulse grew stronger. Raven tilted her head forward until it was parallel with Beast Boy's.

"Azarath Metreon Zinthos," she whispered. A black raven shaped from dark energy leapt out of her and soared into Beast Boy's forehead.

As Robin, Star, and Cyborg watched, Raven slumped slightly against the pillows behind her. After a few moments, the three saw something that very few people ever had the pleasure of seeing. Raven, still cradling Beast Boy's head in her lap, smiled.

"I guess she likes it in there," Cyborg said, hardly believing the words as he said them.

Thanks again for reading and (hint, hint) reviewing my story! I'm not going to commit to a for sure date for the next chapter, but I'll say that the absolute longest that it'll be is a week, unless something really drastic happens. :D

-Liss