Chapter Twelve
Hey guys! Okay, first of all, thank you all so so much for reviewing the last chapter – I actually made fifty reviews which is absolutely awesome, so huge thanks to every single one of you, I really do appreciate it : ) And now on to the apologies…sorry it took so long for this update, my computer is being really annoying at the minute and it lost the first draft of this update, as well as my plan for the next one, grrr! And…please don't hate me…but this will be the last chapter for a few weeks. Some of you may remember me saying I'm writing my MA dissertation, well it's due in at the end of September and at the minute it's a complete disaster! So I'm not allowing myself anywhere near this story until it's handed in! But don't worry, I will get back to it in October! Having said that, I have got a bit of writer's block with where to go next…I'd kind of thought about how to break Peyton and Lucas up and get Jake back everything and not really got much further than that (although obviously I know I've got to get Brucas together!) So yeah, what I'm trying to say is that if anyone has any ideas of things they would like to see happen, either particular scenes or ideas for an ending…well, all input would be great! Even if I don't use everyone's ideas it might well get my brain back into writing mode, and that's gotta be good, right? Anyway, enjoy the chapter, and I promise I'll be back in a few weeks with a new one, so please don't forget about the story! x
"Oww!" Lucas screamed in shock and pain as Brooke's palm connected with his cheek.
"Get off me Luke!" the brunette shouted, anger dominating her voice as she fought to free herself of him, digging her nails into his chest in an attempt to push him away.
"Alright, alright," the boy gasped, removing his arms from her waist and letting her fall to the floor. "Jesus Brooke," he muttered, rubbing his stinging cheek.
"What the fuck was that Lucas Scott?" Brooke demanded hotly, punctuating each word with a push as she aimed to evict him from her bedroom.
"I'm sorry Brooke," Lucas tried, doing his best to avoid the blows that were being rained on him.
"Sorry?" she screamed, her voice even louder as tears streamed down her cheeks. Lucas longed to comfort her, to take her in his arms, but as he reached out to touch her she lashed out again, beating her hands against his chest so as to keep him at arms length.
"Brooke!" he shouted desperately, wrapping his arms around his chest for protection and edging backwards away from the girl, almost colliding with Nathan and Haley who had burst into the room at the sound of screaming.
"Okay, Brooke, calm down," Nathan murmured, scooping the girl up effortlessly and cradling her in his arms as though she was no bigger than James, ignoring the feeble kicks she threw at him and holding her tight, until finally she lay still, tears pouring down her cheeks.
"Come on Luke," Haley whispered, seeing the fight drain from the brunette's face and taking her friend's hand. Numbly, he followed her, not taking his eyes of the girl in his brother's arms until the door had closed behind him.
"Shhh, it's okay," Nathan tried, sitting down on Brooke's bed, the sobbing girl still in his lap, wrapping his arms tightly around her and dropping a soothing kiss on her hair. "It's okay," he repeated gently.
"No it's not," the brunette argued, grabbing the front of Nathan's shirt and drying her eyes with it, ignoring his chuckle of protest. "Your brother's an ass," she muttered darkly, eyes flashing with anger and yet more tears.
Nathan sighed. "I know," he agreed. "What did he do this time?" he asked, uncertain of whether he really wanted to hear the answer.
"He broke up with Peyton," Brooke whispered, hoping that the younger Scott would understand why this had upset her so much, and feeling a wave of relief as he nodded. "And then he kissed me," she muttered, turning her face away from Nathan's so that he didn't see the corners of her mouth threaten to turn up in a traitorous smile as she remembered the moment.
"He kissed you?" the boy repeated incredulously, unable to believe Lucas's stupidity. Shaking his head, he exhaled slowly, uncertain of how to process this information. "Why don't you tell me what happened from the beginning?" he suggested finally.
Brooke shrugged, leaning against Nathan's head in an attempt to draw comfort from his warm body. "I don't know," she whispered, "he came to see if I was okay, but then he didn't even understand why I was upset in the first place, which just shows how little he ever understood me," she finished bitterly. "And then, I tried to explain it to him, and we just ended up fighting, and then he kissed me. And the stupidest thing of all?" she added, a ghost of a smile appearing through the tears, "I wasn't really even mad at him Nate."
Nathan frowned, confused by his friend's last statement. "What do you mean?" he asked. "You sure sounded as though you were mad at him."
The fragile girl sighed, looking down into her lap and speaking quietly, as though to herself. "I'm mad at Peyton," she clarified. "I gave up Lucas for her and for nothing. But that wasn't really Luke's fault, so I'm not really mad at him," she repeated, "I'm just scared. Scared that Lucas might not want me after all, and even more scared that he might. So I shouted at him to push him away. Does that make any sense?" she questioned, finally looking up into the blue eyes that were almost, but not quite, the same as his brother's.
"Yeah, it does," the boy nodded. "It's not easy getting back in the ring with the one that knocked you out in the first place, right?" he smiled, paraphrasing the words he had said to Brooke a year previously.
Brooke chuckled. "Can't you think of anything original to say?" she teased, causing Nathan to laugh in relief at the smile on her face. "Anyway," she shrugged sadly, a cloud passing across her green eyes, darkening them, "I'm not going back there Nate, I can't do that to myself again."
Nathan sighed. "Lucas loves you Brooke," he told her gently. "He does," he repeated, cutting her off as she opened her mouth to protest, "he's just not very good at showing it."
"Well you got that right," she muttered darkly, biting her lip, before shaking her head as though to clear it. "Anyway, we're proabably reading too much into this," she tried, "it was only a kiss after all. Let's face it," she snorted angrily, "now that he doesn't have Peyton any more, Luke probably wants an easy lay. And who better than Brooke Davis for that, huh?" she asked sarcastically, tears of self-loathing springing to her eyes as she clenched her fists furiously.
Nathan sighed again, cupping Brooke's chin gently with one hand and tilting her face towards his, enabling him to look into her eyes. "You've got to stop thinking of yourself like that Brooke," he told her firmly. "That's not how Lucas sees you, hell, it's not how anyone sees you any more, and it shouldn't be how you see yourself." Seeing her open her mouth to protest, he placed a gentle finger over her lips and continued. "I know what you're doing," he told her, "pretending that you're just a hard-faced bitch who sleeps around, just so that you don't have to let anyone in. Well it's not gonna work Brooke, because if that's all you were, do you really think you'd be in here crying your heart out?"
Brooke shrugged, annoyed that he'd seen past her façade. "Life was easy when I was a whore," she muttered, and the boy chuckled, amused at her choice of words.
"Maybe so," he agreed, "but you deserve better than that."
"You mean Lucas?" the girl snorted. "I'd rather take my chances with an STD."
Nathan laughed, rolling his eyes before turning serious again. "What are you going to do?" he asked gently, concern filling his voice.
The brunette shrugged again. "I don't know," she whispered finally. "I guess we can try and be friends again, Peyton too. Hell, it's not as if they can hurt me any more, right?" she added bitterly, a glint of anger returning to her green orbs.
"Just friends?" Nathan prodded carefully, knowing that Brooke could never really be just friends with his brother.
She nodded sadly. "I love him Nate," she murmured, tears beginning to fall as she spoke, " but I can't trust him."
The boy sighed in understanding, pulling Brooke closer and kissing her gently on the forehead. "Why don't you try and get some sleep?" he suggested finally, and she nodded in agreement, climbing off his lap and pulling Lucas's hoodie out from under her pillow. Nathan raised an eyebrow as she slipped it over her head, but said nothing, shifting from his position to make room for her to slip beneath the covers.
"What are you doing?" the girl asked suspiciously as the younger Scott lay down beside her, cradling her comfortingly from on top of the duvet.
"I'm waiting till you fall asleep," he stated simply, and she smiled.
"Tutor-girl's got you well trained," she joked, and he chuckled.
"Just go to sleep Brooke," he retorted teasingly, and with a faint smile on her tear-stained face the broken girl finally closed her eyes.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Well?" Haley demanded, leading Lucas into the living room and pushing him down onto a sofa, standing before him with a violent expression in her eyes. "What did you do Luke?"
Lucas sighed, still uncertain of how things had changed so dramatically for the worse in such a short period of time. "I kissed her," he admitted finally, ducking his head to avoid seeing the fury in his best friend's eyes. "I know it was stupid," he continued, "but she was so close to me, and all I wanted was to reach out and touch her, and then I just couldn't take it any more, so I did it. And for a minute it was perfect Hales," he whispered sadly, looking up finally and allowing the girl to see the pain clouding his blue eyes as he spoke. "It was perfect," he repeated, almost dreamily, "and then, well, I guess she came to her senses, and beat the crap out of me." The boy let out a dry, humourless laugh as he gestured to the scratches and bruises that now adorned his chest.
"Well I won't say you didn't deserve that," Haley growled, but less fiercely than she had spoken previously. "God Luke, what were you thinking?" she asked exasperatedly, sinking down onto the sofa next to him. "You break up with Peyton and then start kissing Brooke less than an hour later?"
"Hey, at least I broke up with Peyton first," Lucas tried, wincing as Haley jabbed an elbow into his ribs. "Okay, not funny," he admitted, "But was the abuse really necessary? I'm already in pain here!"
"Good," the girl muttered. "So?" she questioned again, "do I get a proper answer? Because jokes really aren't helpful here, not one when of the people I love most in the world is crying her heart down the hall."
Lucas bit his lip guiltily, glancing in the direction of Brooke and Rachel's bedroom as though it would help him see what was going on in there. "I dunno Hales," he started, running his hands through his hair in confusion, "I guess I wasn't thinking. She was so upset, and I kept saying the wrong thing and making it worse, and I just wanted to stop her from hurting." The boy smiled sadly, before continuing, his voice dropping to an almost inaudible whisper. "It's what I used to do when we were dating," he confided, "she'd get mad about some stupid little thing I'd done, and start yelling at me, and she'd just look so hot that I wouldn't be able to resist kissing her, and, well…"
"You'd end up having sex and never sort out the problem?" Haley finished sarcastically, rolling her eyes as Lucas nodded. "Word of advice Luke, just in case Brooke ever does decide to forgive you, that's probably not the best way to sort out problems in your relationship."
The boy rolled his eyes. "You know, being married doesn't mean you get to tell the rest of us how we should behave," he muttered crossly, before catching himself as he saw a flicker of hurt cross Haley's eyes. "Sorry Hales," he murmured apologetically, patting her knee, "I shouldn't be taking it out on you. It's just…" he paused for a moment, exhaling loudly, "I'm not sure she ever will forgive me," he finished sadly. "I really screwed things up this time."
"Yeah, you did," his friend agreed, chuckling at the pained expression on Lucas's face.
"Hey, I thought you were meant to be making me feel better," he protested in mock outrage.
Haley grinned, pleased to hear the faint amusement in her friend's voice. "Well I haven't decided yet if you deserve to feel better," she joked, before the smile disappeared from her face as the sound of Brooke's crying drifted under her bedroom door and infiltrated the living room, mingled with Nathan's deep murmurings of comfort.
Lucas winced, feeling a physical pain as he listened to Brooke's heartbreak. "What do I do Hales?" he begged desperately of his friend.
The girl sighed, placing a comforting arm around Lucas's neck and drawing him closer to her. "There's nothing you can do Luke," she replied finally. "Just let her calm down and then apologise, and hope like hell she forgives you. And if she does, then be her friend, okay?"
"But –" Lucas opened his mouth to protest, but Haley cut him off.
"I mean it Luke," she warned. "Friend. No declarations of love, no kissing, no flirting, no nothing, okay?" Seeing his unwilling nod, she continued, explaining her reasoning. "Look, when you wanted Brooke back after cheating on her the first time, it took a lot of strength on her part to trust you again, and you abused that trust. And this time, not only did you kiss Peyton, but then you dated her, slept with her, told her you loved her. How is Brooke supposed to believe that it's her you really want?"
Lucas sighed, shaking his head. "She just is Hales, I can't explain it. She's the one that makes my heart skip a beat every time I see her, the one that makes my heart ache when she cries…she's everything," he whispered.
Haley smiled. "I know," she told him, "I can see the difference between the way you look at Brooke and the way you look at Peyton, hell, we all can. But Brooke? Well all she can see is the image of the two of you kissing on that web cam."
The blond boy nodded, understanding his friend's words. "I will make her see the difference," he vowed. "I have to."
"She'll see it eventually," Haley reassured the anxious boy. "Just take your time Luke, okay? Don't push it."
Lucas nodded again, getting to his feet and heading towards the door. "Thanks Hales," he smiled, before gesturing to the door. "I'm gonna take a walk, think some things through. I'll see you later, okay?"
"Yeah, see you later," the girl agreed, watching as her friend left, before sinking back onto the sofa, breathing a sigh of relief as she realised the sound of sobbing could no longer be heard.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"So, Brooke didn't take the news well then?" Jake asked sympathetically, sitting down beside Peyton in the hot tub, having left a sleeping Jenny in the care of Mouth.
"She said she finished with Lucas because I said I loved him," Peyton whispered, almost in disbelief, "and now I'm saying that I don't, it was all for nothing."
Jake sighed, taking his former girlfriend's hand and rubbing it soothingly. "Well, I can see where she's coming from," he admitted. "I mean," he chuckled wryly, "when I heard you say that you loved Lucas, it broke my heart, and now that you've split up a part of me thinks that if only you'd known how you really felt it would have saved us all a lot of heartache."
"So you think I'm a selfish bitch as well?" the girl asked sadly, a tear running down her cheek as Jake smiled.
"No, I don't think that. I know you really thought you loved Lucas," he told her reassuringly, slipping an arm around her shoulders and drawing her close to him, "and so does Brooke really, she just hasn't calmed down enough to realise it yet."
Peyton shook her head. "She really hates me Jake," she told the boy, "you didn't hear the things she said."
"Brooke doesn't hate you," Jake repeated firmly, "but I can understand why she thinks she does. It killed me when I arrived to find out you and Lucas were together, and Brooke had to live through that every day? Not able to tell her best friend how she felt? That must have been awful for her Pey." The girl nodded in understanding and he continued. "Especially when she was the one who pushed the two of you together in the first place."
"I didn't ask her to give Lucas up," the blond girl muttered, feeling a stab of guilt as Jake explained Brooke's feelings.
Jake chuckled. "I know," he told her, "but I also know how afraid Brooke was that you and Lucas would decide you were meant to be together. If I'm honest, when we were together, I was scared that would happen too," he admitted, tracing a circle on Peyton's back as he spoke. "Brooke pushed Lucas to you because for her, the two of you together was the worst case scenario. Once that happened, nothing else could hurt her," he finished.
Peyton nodded sadly, tears streaming down her face as she contemplated Jake's words. "Rachel was right," she managed finally, causing the boy to look down at her in confusion.
"Right about what?" he questioned, worry evident in his face as he watched Peyton cry quietly.
A moment passed before the girl rubbed her eyes and began to speak. "Rachel said that I didn't deserve Brooke, because when she was crying over losing Lucas I was out there chasing him, and she was right," her sobs escalated again, and Jake waited patiently, rubbing Peyton's back comfortingly. "What sort of friend lets their friend go through that on their own, Jake?" she cried desperately. "And worse what sort of friend causes that much pain?" Tears of self-loathing streamed from her blue eyes, splashing into the hot tub as Jake pulled her closer, letting her sob in his arms.
"The sort of friend who made a mistake," he whispered finally. "And Brooke wasn't on her own," he reminded her soothingly, "she had Haley, and Rachel."
Peyton chuckled wryly. "Not so long ago Brooke hated Rachel," she told Jake, "and now Rachel's proven she's a better friend than I could ever be."
"That's not true," Jake tried, "Brooke will forgive you, you know that."
"Maybe so," the blonde murmured. "But that doesn't mean I deserve it," she pointed out, remembering Haley's words.
Jake sighed. "Listen to me," he instructed, "you can't change what's already happened, but you can change what happens in the future. You just need to show Brooke that you really are sorry, and eventually she'll learnt to trust you again, I promise."
Peyton nodded. "I hope you're right," she whispered, before turning back to the boy who held her. "And what about you Jake?" she asked, elaborating when a confused frown furrowed his forehead. "Can you ever trust me again?"
The boy smiled sadly. "I trust you Pey," he told her, knowing immediately where her line of questioning was heading, "but you hurt me too you know. When I heard you say you loved Lucas my heart broke. I just need to be sure that you won't change your mind again."
The girl nodded again. "I always loved you," she murmured, looking up into the comforting brown eyes that always made her feel as though she was at home, and smiling slightly as the corners of Jake's mouth twitched upwards, betraying his happiness at her words. "I screwed everything up, didn't I?" she sighed rhetorically, dropping her gaze from his when he didn't speak.
Jake chuckled, tilting her head back to face him and dropping a kiss on her cheek, dangerously close to her lips. "No you didn't," he countered, "and anyway, we've got through worse than this before."
Peyton kinked her eyebrows, confusion clouding her eyes. "You mean…?" she questioned, hardly daring to hope that Jake was implying what she thought he was. "You mean you think we can work things out?" she managed finally, holding her breath as she waited for an answer.
The boy smiled, nodding. "It might not be easy," he cautioned, "and I don't think we should rush into anything, but I'd like to think we can eventually. Just…" he paused for a second, losing himself in her blue eyes before tearing himself away and completing the sentence, "friends first, okay?"
Peyton nodded. "Friends," she whispered in agreement, "I could use one of those," she added, with a cynical laugh.
"You'll work things out with Brooke," Jake tried reassuringly, stroking a blonde curl away from her face.
The girl shrugged. "What about Haley and Rachel?" she questioned. "They're pissed at me too. Not that I care too much what Rachel thinks," she clarified, "but Haley seemed pretty disappointed in me."
"Just talk to them," Jake advised, lacing his fingers with Peyton's in an effort to return the smile to her face. "It'll be okay," he murmured comfortingly, "you'll see."
Peyton sighed. "I hope you're right," she whispered, but uncertainty clouded her voice, and as the two sat there, water bubbling merrily around them, Jake found himself crossing his fingers.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"How is she?" Haley looked up anxiously from feeding James as her husband walked into the living room, running his hands through his hair exhaustedly.
"She's asleep," Nathan announced, sinking onto the sofa next to his wife and grinning at his son. "But she's a mess," he continued. "Luke's really screwed things up this time."
Rachel snorted. "No change there then," she muttered viciously, kicking at the carpet in an expression of disgust.
"Where's Jake?" Nathan asked Mouth, seeing Jenny sitting on his friend's lap and choosing to ignore Rachel's comment.
"Talking to Peyton," Mouth responded, smiling at the little girl who was undressing the doll she held, telling the toy in no uncertain terms that she shouldn't be wearing a sweater at the beach.
Rachel rolled her eyes. "The bitch didn't waste any time then," she remarked snidely.
"Rachel," Haley warned, throwing a pointed glance at Jenny who thankfully appeared not to have heard.
"Whatever," the redhead shrugged. "From what Brooke tells me about her mother, I bet the kid's heard worse."
"She's got a point there Hales," Nathan admitted with a smile, placing a comforting hand on his wife's knee to prevent her from protesting further. "But," he told the smirking girl, "the same doesn't apply to James, and I know he's too young too understand," he continued, seeing Rachel open her mouth to argue, "but we would appreciate it if you could watch your language around him, okay?"
Rachel opened her mouth and then closed it again. "Fine," she finally agreed sulkily. "But Peyton is a witch," she repeated, pointedly choosing a more acceptable word as Haley rolled her eyes.
"It wasn't one of her finer moments, that's for sure," Haley agreed. "She didn't even understand why Brooke was upset," she added to Nathan and Mouth who sighed in disbelief.
"How did things get so screwed up?" Mouth wondered, receiving shrugs from Nathan and Haley.
"Simple," Rachel announced, a smile playing on her lips. "Lucas rejected me," she pointed out, "and that's where all his problems started."
Mouth chuckled, as Haley rolled her eyes once again. "Hate to damage your ego," she countered sarcastically, "but the never-ending love triangle was already firmly in place before you arrived in town. You were just a plot device."
"Yeah, well, maybe Lucas is just a plot device," the redhead argued. "After all, Brooke and Peyton were sleeping with the same guy long before Luke showed up, weren't they Nate?" she taunted.
"Leave it Hales," the dark haired Scott cautioned as his wife opened her mouth to make a retort, "this isn't helping anyone, least of all Brooke."
"Do you think she'll be okay?" Mouth asked the room at large, taking Nathan's lead and interrupting before the girls could return to their bickering.
Rachel smiled sadly at the concerned expression on her friend's face. "Don't worry Mouth," she told the boy "Brooke's tough. It'll take more than those two to break her."
"Do you really think so?" Mouth questioned, almost desperately, and the redhead sighed.
"No," she admitted, her voice almost a whisper. Seeing the concerned looks from the other teens she elaborated, sighing. "Brooke's cried herself to sleep every night since she ended things with Lucas," she told them brutally, ignoring the glances of horror and worry the trio exchanged at her words. "She wasn't coping before, and now…well…" her voice trailed off as the group considered the implications of her statement.
Haley was the first to break the silence. "Maybe it'll be easier for her now that she doesn't have to see Lucas and Peyton together," she suggested hopefully.
"Maybe," Rachel conceded, for once not tempted to argue with the young mother. "Or maybe it'll be harder now that she knows she can have Lucas, but just can't trust him," she countered, frowning.
Nathan groaned, his head spinning from the emotional meltdown he had experienced over the previous hours. "Can't I just kick Luke's ass?" he whined. "That would make life so much simpler."
The others chuckled, relieved to have a break from attempting to analyse Brooke's potential reactions. "I think Brooke did fine at that by herself," Haley grinned, remembering the scratches and bruises that adorned Lucas's chest.
"Damn right I did," a voice came from the doorway, and the others spun round in surprise to see Brooke there, hair dishevelled and still dressed only in Lucas's hoodie. Seeing their confusion she smiled slightly. "I couldn't sleep," she announced, "and I heard you guys talking, so…" she shrugged silently. "I guess I didn't want to be alone," she admitted shakily, biting her lip and staring at the floor.
"You're not alone Tigger," Haley sighed, passing James over to his father and making room for Brooke to sit beside her. "It'll be okay," she whispered soothingly, pulling the broken girl into her lap and cuddling her as though she was a small child, "it'll be okay." But as the others watched Haley console her friend, they could only hope desperately that her words would prove to be true.