Chapter 13: Sedative Cigarettes and the thing called Love
Disclaimer: I don't own even the smallest bit of Harry Potter. If I had been, I wouldn't be on this site and oh yea, I'd have all the cars in the world; p
Author's Notes: This is getting a lot harder to update! I mean, my ideas are getting too abysmal and my inspirations lost, soon after I will need all the help I can get from you my readers, I hope you would bless me with some of your ideas as I am running out of them, I shall forever be grateful to you! Thanks once again!
And again…to you amazing reviewers who made this chapter possible:
(Kayi, skittleprincess99, Mamell, Brittasia, blacksniperX, Bloodcalling13, tonangel, peachykin, devielle, applepie, Sandrine, Kaye, Darkpixy, ashley48506, bloody priestess, dance4ever88, HarryPotterFreakEver, Deadrose21, Sammygurl262316, muskymcfurry, LIVE FOR MUSIC, Vritti, RavenclawPrincess13, Juicy-Fruit for Drako, Sibes, emma, Jinger, dorie, The Legend Begins, Benjie and Draco hot should be Goths, sarklover826)
If you have noticed I didn't use the individual messages for each reviewer but I'm doing this as an experiment since there were rumors flying around that isn't allowing that anymore, however if my suspicions are confirmed, I will be doing the individual messages in the next chapter.
THANKS ALL VERY MUCH!
Draco's POV
I immediately stood up with my head still whirring from the cigarettes I had, it was a doltish notion to have to rely on them, and these abysmal cigarettes are going to wheedle my sanity slowly out of me.
But surprisingly and ironically this cigarette which could cause my insanity is about the only thing I could rely on.
The cigarette has always been my solace; only in that little stick could I find real salvation from the emptiness of my life.
The way its smoke fills my head with delusions, I feel so free…I find solace in the destruction of that stick.
There I could find real fulfillment and more, in that cigarette, I am offered the delusion of seducing the mudblood finally into my bed.
Ha! The mudblood, I gave out a scornful light laugh, where could she be now?
She's obviously more of a challenge than I thought she would be…
I smirked, she sounded like a nun betrothed to Jesus…
The wind blew making my cold skin even colder, the night had been troublesome with Blaise and I drinking ourselves silly and that didn't alleviate the situation.
It was an idiotic option to choose, but in a time wherein man has to choose between his limited options, he chooses the worst and I just did that.
I was getting increasingly cold and I had to rub my palms together to keep me warm, surprisingly they had the tiniest effect on me.
I'm going to freeze to death if I don't do something soon.
Maybe I'm cold because it was aggravated by the steady spins of the room.
I barely noticed the mudblood who was carefully standing up.
When I did notice her, I gave her one of my meanest scowls. How could she be here in a time like this?
How could she see me like this?
Moreover, how could she be here in a time wherein I am so vulnerable?
"Dammit Granger! Get out of here!" I roared
She said nothing but straightened her skirts and then the question struck me like lightning,
"What are you doing here?" I barked
She shrugged and regarded me as if I were nothing but mere air surrounding her, but I did notice she had a kind of flush on her cheek which made me curious.
"Then if you're here, make yourself useful by lighting the furnace"
She looked at me as if I were some nutter and that really annoyed me
She made it seem like she knew most things and that I was nothing more than an undergraduate student deficient in knowledge
"Well!" I huffed
"The furnace won't help you, Malfoy" she said simply with that all too irritating knowing look on her face
Damn her!
Can't she see I was dying here?
Some cold mudblood of a bitch she is!
I hate know-it-alls, particularly when it comes to know-it-alls like her!
I instantly cocked an eyebrow and sardonically ask, "And what, may I ask makes you think that!"
"You're in a sedate state right now" she explained
"And?" I demanded raising my eyebrows as if to question her sanity
"That won't help you; you're in a sedate state. Your mind is very weak and it will play weird tricks on you soon if you don't get warm enough"
I gave a silent laugh, a scornful one in fact.
She had this seductive way of implying and saying things without the merest idea of what she's doing.
Her innocent vulnerability makes her a lot more appealing, and hell lot harder for me to endure.
Particularly in the loins, mind you.
I ignored the aching pain I felt between my legs and said,
"Then dearest mudblood, why don't you give me the pleasure of warming me up if that's what you suggest"
Color rose to her cheeks and I laughed at that, she was in a more vulnerable state than I am…
She moistened her lips with her tongue and that simple act alone made me want to stand up and directly kiss her, there and now.
But I wasn't known for losing my self control immediately.
If I can help it, that is…
"No, I guess not!" she said coldly
Unfortunately, that didn't do much to ease the cold.
I sat down and started to shiver as I scrunched my forehead
"Light the furnace, mudblood!" I commanded
"I already told you!" she said impatiently "It won't help you!"
I nearly wanted to choke her to death for saying that, "Then, all knowledgeable and prodigious mudblood, might you explain a bit more on why this can't help me!"
"Those cigarettes are the cause, Malfoy"
That was not answering the question; somehow she is giving me the impression that she is evading the answers to my queries
"I am perfectly aware of that, thank you" I spat
Why isn't she giving me any answers?
She was fidgeting about something I didn't know what, why was she acting so weird anyway?
My head started to spin, if she doesn't do anything soon, I was pretty sure I was going to die.
Hermione's POV
"Well?" he asked
I sighed, the moment he stood up I knew he could remember nothing, he can't even remember those three words he had said and I don't think I need to tell him what he just said, he'll find out himself and it probably wasn't true.
I kept silent, thoughts running backward and forward through my head making me utterly confused and leaving me just as vulnerable as he is.
Besides in his sedate state, who would know whether what he said was true or not?
No one would ever know, for a man like Draco will never understand what love means because of the fact that in his dark life, he has never experienced love.
Never will he find a reason to love or be loved because he is Draco… a heartless and ruthless man, incapable of loving but capable of killing just that.
But that didn't bother me, what bothered me was….
The fact the he said he loved me as if he knew what the word meant even if he was in deep slumber.
Only God could tell what he truly meant.
The more I thought of it the more I got confused and bothered.
"I believe I asked you a question, Granger"
His voice cracked my torpor and snapped me back to reality. I looked at him and was surprised to find him too pale, paler than usual.
His icy glare demanded an answer from me
"You smoked one too many, Malfoy and you aggravated it by alcohol, nothing can ease the coldness, I'm sorry, you will just have to wait"
"Wait for death!" he asked incoherently "Well thank you for suggesting that mudblood, I think I'll do just that!" he scoffed
I didn't answer him, the past events of the room stirred something in me and I didn't want to confuse what they meant, I had to get away from him fast.
No, as far as I am concerned I want to get out of this house no matter what and that was entirely impossible so I'll just have to settle for what I can do now.
I walked away from him and neared the furnace in hopes that he wouldn't ask what else could he do to make himself warmer.
Actually there was a way to ease out the cold he is experiencing but I didn't want him to know what it was.
The thought alone made me blush.
The thought alone was revolting, I didn't want to do it, never would I dream of doing it but because of this mixed up notions and pent up emotions, I don't know what to believe anymore.
I heard the steady clinks of glasses drawn together, but I ignored it. I was more aware of what I'm beginning to feel than to actually care what is happening around me.
I'm not exactly clear with my emotions anymore, that's why I wanted to get away from him and from this house before I start to think of this feeling as something else.
I was insanely incoherent and from all that thinking beads of sweat began to form on my forehead. I spotted a stick and made a grab for it.
I grabbed the ugly looking stick that closely resembled a chopstick that was sitting atop on the furnace. I piled my hair into a bun using the stick.
"Hermione…" he whispered, as if he had a hard time speaking
His voice was so gentle it was almost a caress…
Again, his voice cracked but this time it was more like a plea than a demand, and it was endearingly painful to hear that kind of voice. The same tone he used when he said he wanted me…..
The same tone he used to say that he loved me
"Are you suggesting that I die instead?" he said hoarsely
I looked at him clearly appalled by what he just said. I saw what was in his hand, he probably took two more shots of whiskey and that made him a lot colder, alcohol won't be any much effect to the coldness his experiencing instead it is the total opposite.
God! Malfoy why did you have to be so stubborn!
It'll worsen his condition, why didn't he heed my word!
His lips looked so pale they were almost the color of his skin.
Oh my God! How could have I done this!
"Do you fancy a drink with me? And have a toast to my death and finally to you're freedom?" he managed to say jokingly
"No!" I snapped "And what made you think that whiskey would make you feel better?"
He ignored my query; instead, he cocked his brows at me and sighed
He stood up and stated hoarsely, "I think I'm going have to summon a healer"
He won't survive in that state if he would still call a healer he'll probably collapse and suffer a long illness if he does.
"Why didn't you listen to me!" I demanded
"I don't need to take your words seriously because you're a mudblood, besides I don't think you know how serious the situation is, Granger, I think you'd rather have me dead, I'd rather entrust my life to an expert who knows better than to entrust it with careless hands like yours" he stated placidly but there was strain in his voice, as if he had a hard time talking…
He was nearly choking, I need to do something fast.
Mildly hurt by his tone I made my decision…
He was going for the door and I called him out, "Malfoy wait!"
He looked at me impatiently and said, "What! And that's Master Malfoy!"
I rolled my eyes; I can't believe he can still think about that in a life or death situation, what a real git!
"There is actually a way to ease your cold feeling…"
"Then what is it!" he spat
Here goes nothing, besides you might owe me soon enough…
I inwardly smiled
I gulped; I took my blouse off and revealed my upper half to him, with the bra of course.
"Let me show you instead…" I murmured, words barely escaping my mouth
"What are you doing!" he asked as I neared him clearly surprised by what I just did.
Was that an appalled look or a hungry look ready to devour its victim plastered on his face?
I shrugged it off, he needed help
I said nothing and went to him, and then I enveloped my arms around him
He was towering me but I knew this was going to work.
My forehead barely touched his jaw, he was incredibly tall…
And with that body, he was incredibly male
Inadvertently, I blushed and held a bit tighter than I should have
He was incredibly cold; he was making me cold too…
"Only body heat can ease the coldness, it will have to take time, you should do without those cigarettes or soon enough, if you filled your head with more than enough delusions, it'll strain itself and you'll go insane"
"Oh yeah?" he whispered, his slightly cold breath caressing the skin on my cheek, sending goose bumps at the back of my neck.
I held him close, not actually believing myself for doing this...
Damn it, Malfoy! Why did you have to be so idiotic as to do that!
"Oh really?" he asked gruffly "And do you suppose I shall take your word for that when you nearly left me dead?"
But as I looked at his face, he was paler than ever...
The warmth that my body was excreting was not enough, he still looked pale
I immediately withdrew myself from him, all shame gone and discarded the rest of clothing except for my panties.
And then I enveloped my arms around his body again. This time the moment my bare breasts pressed against his cold bare chest, I felt how utterly cold he must be.
Too cold, he was cold as ice.
"You're damn warm, mudblood" he said
I blushed, only realizing then that I had nothing on.
"Shut up" I retorted
He smirked, oh god! It's starting again…
I looked at him and I saw him grinning, the prat was actually enjoying this!
I looked away, I didn't want to do this but I had to, he was going to die out of coldness if I didn't or worse, he'll experience weird hallucinations if not tended.
The unknown feeling resurfaced again and this time, I tried real hard to keep it at bay before I did something really stupid that I might soon regret.
Vaguely aware of my almost nude body I forced myself to think about Harry but surprisingly, not even Harry could keep this growing feeling inside of me at bay.
Dammit!
"Granger" he said surveying me
"Yes?"
He smirked, "I never knew you cared"
I blushed for the thousandth time that day
"I had to do it, it was an obligation rather than an act of caring, Malfoy"
He sneered and said, "Might you explain why?"
"If I left you dead, they would have blamed me for it, who else could they blame? Knowing that I am your enemy after all"
I silently chuckled, that was fast thinking even for me
"Enemy, huh?" he said
"Yes, and I didn't fancy the idea of going to Azkaban for a crime I didn't commit"
His arms suddenly snaked around my waist, pushing me toward him.
My nude body and breasts were pressed against his chest.
It was all I could do not to slap him, but rather I had the slight twinge of feeling that I was enjoying this.
I stared at him and at that instant I met his unmasked solid gray eyes, and I found all the answers there…
He wanted me…
Again I blushed, harder this time "What are you--!"
But his finger crept up and he gently pushed it on my lips, silencing me with its gentle caress.
Waves of emotions swirled around me in indescribable frenzy, it was happening and God knows what I could do to stop it and instinctively my hands crept up to entwine itself on his neck.
His muscles flexed on my breasts, he was incredibly tall and well sculpted, girls would swoon over him easily, I swayed beneath him but he held on tight.
When is this going stop?
Christ help me…
"Did it even occur to you that enemies could become assets?" he murmured
"How?" I sighed in an inaudible whisper
He smirked at that as if it was just what he wanted to hear...
His head came down and for a brief moment I thought he was going to kiss me but it came down on my neck, he just laid his head there for a moment, trailing soft kisses down to my shoulder.
I closed my eyes.
God! You can be so unpredictable sometimes!
What am I going to do now? When now you have totally confused what I thought I have learned from the very beginning from the man who was supposed to marry me…
You're confusing me Draco…
You are confusing love
I'm confusing love
And I'm confused over you…
I'm beginning to reconsider the fact that you are my enemy because soon enough, you won't be…
"Close your eyes…" he whispered on my ears
I didn't bother to ask why I just wanted to know what would happen if I did.
Besides, I was already closing them
"Granger…" he whispered
And for a brief moment I thought he was going to say those words again, those words I longed to hear but I didn't hear them because I felt them…
I felt his lips on mine for a minute, making its savage claim on my mouth but as I opened my mouth, he came plunging inside taking everything and giving nothing in return.
My knees buckled beneath me and I thought it was all I could withstand not to fall but soon enough, he broke the kiss.
"They become assets when they accompany their enemies to intimate places, particularly in bed" he said scornfully
Fury rose to my head, and there I thought he was kissing me with ardor because of love but he did it because of lust!
It wasn't love I had felt but lust!
Damn! How foolish could have I been!
I looked up and searched his eyes, when I hadn't found the one I've been searching for I started to break away from his grasp. But then I noticed, it has grown incredibly tight
"What are you doing, Malfoy?" I asked hotly
"Getting more warmth from you"
I blushed and then I noticed his hand was rubbing on my bare shoulders…
"Malfoy please…"
"No, I thought you wanted to help me?"
"I have helped you enough!" I spat struggling against his lean body
But the more I struggled, the tighter he held me
I looked up to him with imploring auburn eyes to his stormy gray ones.
"Release me"
"Not yet" he breathed on my neck
I sighed; there was no getting away with this if it's Malfoy.
I silently prayed that I wouldn't be carried away with my emotions again but that didn't help so I decided to change the subject instead.
"So Malfoy, considering that I saved your worthless life aren't you going to say some sort of gratitude?"
He laughed at me and asked, "Like what?"
I rolled my eyes, can he be serious? "No, thank you Hermione? Or perhaps….because you saved me I decided to grant you your freedom!"
He smirked and scornfully laughed, "You're in tough luck!"
"Come on!" I said like a three year old "Not even a thank you!"
"My pride weighs more than my morals, Granger I had come to understand than you were aware of that"
I kept silent after that then he said his voice increasingly hoarse and gruff…"Let me thank you in other ways instead"
"What are--?"
But before I could finish what I was intending to say he pulled the stick that was pulling my hair at the back of my head.
Oh no…
My hair spilled over my shoulders and breasts.
"Perfect, and this time I don't want you to struggle or you'll break the moment" he said sardonically
Oh my God! No….
"Think about Harry…" I stated calmly
I mentally kicked myself as I voiced out my thoughts
For a moment I saw anger in his eyes, but not a moment passed when it had gone
"No…" he said caressing my shoulder with his hand
"Think about me instead" he whispered on my neck making the hairs there stand up
I blushed and started to squirm
"Don't do this, Malfoy"
You don't know how you're making me feel just by doing this, Malfoy…
I really wish he wouldn't, if he did again…then I would feel those feelings that I know wouldn't be reciprocated again.
He merely smirked at me and said, "Let's make this warmer then…"
"No Malfoy, I won't let you do what you intend to do…."
"You know as much as I do that you want this, Granger"
And without warning, he took my mouth in his for a long taking passionate kiss.
I squirmed beneath him wanting to be free from his grasp but at the same time enjoying the feeling that he was giving me. He kept kissing me, his tongue sliding in and out taking everything and giving nothing in return.
I pressed my hands on his chest in restraint, but instead of taking that as a warning he took it as an approval, he groaned and delved into my mouth once more in a hot searing kiss.
No! I can't do this anymore…
I don't want to feel the feelings you're making me feel…
When he noticed me squirming beneath him, he stopped and looked at me…
"Please, Draco, I'm begging you, please stop this…"
"Why?"
"Because I love Harry"
"Bullshit!"
Tears stung my eyes, why is it so hard for him to understand!
What I was doing is just to protect the feelings I have for him, I wanted to preserve what I had built from the very beginning. I didn't want to lose my love for Harry because I believe I have fallen in love with you.
"You don't, Granger…I know you want this as much as I do"
"No, please—"
But I was already silenced with his kiss…
This is getting harder and harder for me, why can't he just understand that it's Harry I love and not him?
Why is he being so overly difficult to deal with!
My thoughts were reeling in and out as his hands made its caress on my bare breast, I moaned against my will.
"Draco, please stop!" I cried out I disengaged myself from him, took my clothes and dressed myself quickly and I went for the door but when I did they magically closed themselves.
I turned and saw him holding out his wand and pointing them to the doors making them close.
I stared at him his stance was calm but there was a hard look in his face, he was incredibly angry
"Draco, why do you even try to question my feelings for Harry when you don't even know what love is itself? Why can't you just understand that I'm just trying to protect myself from you!"
"Then make me understand love, Granger!"
"What?" I asked not quite believing what he just said
But he shrugged it off and said something else
"You are not leaving without giving me an explanation"
I stared at him for a couple of seconds then said
"What do you want me to say, Malfoy?" I retorted
"I merely want to know why you find me so revolting" he said
"You're not revolting in fact you are wonderful and gorgeous" I said honestly
Though not as gorgeous as Harry
I can't believe why we are having this conversation
"Thank you for noticing I was beginning to wonder if you have noticed the innumerable women I brought to my bed, Granger leaving them panting after me"
I rolled my eyes, he was still a prat no matter what and I did notice the innumerable ladies he has brought to bed every night. Who couldn't with those horrid sounds I had to endure while making HIS homework and MINE during the seventh year.
Suddenly he was walking to me, closing the distance between us but with his dark gaze, I could do nothing but stay rooted on the spot.
Oh no! Prepare for the worst Hermione….
"What I do not understand is, Hermione…is why you don't want to do this with me, or at least find me attractive or moreover, why you refuse to want me when your body has yielded to the caresses of my own"
He was standing before me, gloriously gorgeous like a God, he was so beautiful, perfectly sculpted and made, his gray eyes held nothing but remorse and lust; I was a product of that lust.
My knees buckled beneath me, betraying my body because of his dark gaze.
I wanted him!
God help me! I wanted him but I had to deny that fact because want is not enough to satisfy love.
I don't love him like I love Harry.
I don't want this feeling right now.
I wanted it away from me.
"Tell me, Hermione….is it so hard to make fucking love to your enemy?" he said angrily
I took in deep breaths, he was towering me with his height and his stare demanded the answer I couldn't give.
"It is hard, Malfoy because as we all know it is not making love, it is just sex because you know as well as I do, that neither of us hold any affections for the other and of course, we are both well aware that I still hold feelings for Harry"
Although I was hardly denying that because certainly a while ago, when he was asleep he had said what I couldn't believe he would ever say.
"How very rational" he sneered
"But perhaps, we can make arrangements suitable for the both of us…"
His hand crept up and tried to separate the blouse I used to cover my breasts, I stopped them.
"If you are talking about an affair, Malfoy I'm afraid not. No arrangement could ever dissuade me from my love of Harry, Malfoy I hope you are capable of understanding that" I said firmly
His mouth edged up, "I am perfectly capable of understanding that you are a staunch bitch for your loser of a fiancé"
His words stung my eyes but I held my tears, "You're so cruel, Malfoy"
"As you said, Granger, I am a Malfoy"
Yes, but a while ago even I was fooled that a man like you could love now I know better.
"Please, let me leave this room---"
Before I could say another word, his mouth came crushing down to mine, kissing me as if
I was nothing but his harlot.
But that was all I was right?
His harlot.
I clamped my mouth shut, not allowing him to gain access, no…not anymore!
I pushed him away and with that, he slightly abraded my shoulder by holding on tight.
I slapped him hard and I thought I would get a blow too…
"I won't be manhandled, Malfoy—"
"Damn it, Granger! You're so hard to understand, your body tells me that you want me—"
"My body betrays me, Malfoy" I said stiffly
He smirked, "So now am I supposed to hear your confession?"
I sighed and looked at him, he was simply not getting this, "I do want you, Malfoy with all due respect I do, I long for your body to touch mine or have you kiss me, have you touch me in places so intimate but then again Malfoy, I have my own ethics saying that I still love Harry to consider but even that is getting questionable and so to answer your question, yes, I do want you…"
Something flickered in his eyes when he said, "So I gather that there is no problem, Granger than what are you fussing about"
I turned away from him; I can't say this to him in front of him…
I began walking to the double doors and said, "It's simple, Draco…I never want to want you..."
"You sound like you're married to Jesus!" he roared "Can't you even have a bit of fun?"
No, I can't…
Not when my feelings are on the line Draco
I didn't bother to answer him
Instead I walked away and this time, he didn't hold me back instead the doors magically opened for me to make my hastened exit.
Draco's POV
"Damn you, Hermione!" I roared as she went out of my room
I could have sworn there were tears in her eyes, why did she have to deny the fact that she wants me?
Why does she have to be so all saintly as to follow her biased ethics?
Doesn't she understand that sex is so simple? It's just for a night!
One night and that's it!
Is that so hard to do?
Dammit!
I vaguely noticed that my anger replaced the coldness I had felt a while ago.
It's all the mudblood's fault! Why couldn't she just provide me what I need?
Damned Harlot!
I swore so loudly I thought I was in it for that idiot maid again, but gladly and fortunately she didn't come down to see that I was unhappily unspent and have weird notions about doing it for me again.
I could have sworn I could still feel the taste she had on that horrid mouth of hers. Damn all the women in this manor!
They're all fucking insufferable!
I sighed as I slumped down on the couch.
Someday Granger…
Someday…
I'll have you
All it needs is a little patience and a little seduction
I inwardly swore, this is going to be harder than I thought.
I noticed that I clutched something in my hand, it was her stick, the one she used to pile her hair.
I looked at it…
A while ago she acted like she cared
Like she'd give a damn if I died
I scornfully laughed at the idea
Care! That bitch!
Hell no, she wouldn't care for me, never in this world would she have the heart to care for someone like me…
Someone who is so ruthless and menacing
No, she be fooling herself if she actually cared
And Hermione Granger is not foolish, she'll make sure she has something in return to for her to care for somebody
Something….
Something called love perhaps?
Love! I scoffed
I don't know what it is, I could never care for another person as much as I care for myself!
And Love? Well, Love destroys you, I don't want to destroy myself
One solid example of Love's destruction is the mudblood herself.
I smirked, she saved me just to save herself as well
She said it herself, she saved me so she wouldn't land in Azkaban
And suddenly a streak of thought entered my mind as I though about that…
But what if she really did care for you…?
How in blazes could have I asked myself that!
I don't want the damned mudblood's care…
I wanted so much more…
I mentally kicked myself on my throbbing area
"Fuck it, Draco!" I said to myself "You cannot go on wanting something you don't understand…"
I was thinking so hard that the stick I clutched snapped in two…
I don't want anything more than the mudblood's body
But then again, before all of this happened before her touch happened, I had a biased notion that she would feel revolting.
And that I would never touch her for anything in the world.
And now I am finding myself in a state of unspent lust all because of her touch.
Maybe if I'd pursue this kind of path I would find myself in a trap of no return…
No…
All I want is her body, which has been normal from the very beginning.
I rarely had sex these days that's why I felt this way.
But there was also the distinct feeling I had when she's around, especially when that smart mouth of hers starts talking.
Its sensual curves was all she needed to drive me crazy with a frenzy of lust.
"Damn you, Granger…"
I sighed…
I was saved by her
By a mudblood
I smirked
Somehow, she gave me the impression that no other person could have saved me but her…
Only her…
"Only you…" I whispered to the winds
And then I remembered what she had whispered when I held her tight…
"Think about, Harry!"
Fresh anger surged to my veins making them throb menacingly.
Fuck Potter!
I broke away from my trance and reminded myself that I was angry at her.
"Fuck all the women of this house and fuck this dark life I've been dealing with for the past 19 years!"
I spotted the box of cigarettes I had that evening and I threw them across the room and spat, "And fuck you for making me so damn horny tonight!"
I woke up early the next morning with a broad smirk on my face
I had a brilliant plan
It was flawless; it absolutely surprised me that I even thought about it
It was absolutely perfect that I didn't notice the owl that was tapping its beak to my window pane. Of course, who would notice? With the inane notion my mother had of keeping curtains drawn….
I couldn't think of anything else but the plan…
Perhaps it will work and finally I will be able to outsmart the brilliant Hermione Granger
And when I will, I'll say it in front of her face and gloat about forever
So now I'm being childish, but hell who cares? It's damn good to be evil…
I stared at the dark blue velvet box which was lying on the end table of my bead. I smiled in spite in myself; it's a good plan…maybe it'll work after all…
Suddenly I felt a hot searing pain on my forehead.
I shut my eyes, it was as if a hundred daggers punched themselves on my forehead.
It was too damned painful…
More painful that what I have felt last night…
I opened my eyes and screamed for Palace.
Hermione's POV
I didn't sleep much, I swear I just closed my eyes when I felt a rather large hand raking on my hair and on my face, badgering me to wake up.
I waved the hand off thinking of the wasted hours I spent with Malfoy; I should be getting more sleep.
The abnormally enormous hand persisted and it made me gag as it covered my nose.
I sat erect and with as much rage as I could muster I shouted, "What's your problem! If you haven't noticed it's still around 5 in the morning and the sun hasn't shown its face yet"
I stared at the woman, it turns out it was Annie Palace. I didn't mean to be rude or anything but if a person doesn't get enough sleep, well let's just say that strange things happen.
She looked almost imploring while she said, "Please, Ms. Granger—"
Ms. Granger, huh? Weird…what's with the sudden formalities?
"Malfoy asks for you" she finished
Some prat Malfoy is waking me up at dawn
"Tell him to buzz off and find someone else to bother" I murmured as I grabbed the sheets and was readying myself for that warm comfortable sleep I have been deprived of.
"Hermione, please…he'll die…"
I smirked, he was too predictable…
"Well, let him die instead and tell him I send my condolences" I said sardonically as I shut my eyes
Malfoy isn't fooling me for one, that cigarette had a temporary effect, there is possibly no way he could be suffering from anything just about now.
Nothing would aggravate the effect that easily, I should know…
"Hermione please, he's really pale…" Annie pleaded
I rolled my eyes
Damn Malfoy, you're such an actor…
As I was already up, without any chance of getting more sleep with the maid Malfoy sent, I decided to humor him and embarrass him as well.
That ought to teach him
I got up, pulled the garments off my body and dressed into the clothes that were left for me but I noticed Annie flinch her nose…
"Is anything wrong?" I inquired with one brow raised
She cleared her throat as if she didn't want to say what she was about to say but she had to.
And to add her predicament, she was having much difficulty speaking as she seems to be choking…
"Well, you see…." She looked at me and was unwilling to continue the rest of her sentence
"Go on" I urged
"Well, Master Malfoy wanted you to wear these instead of those rags as he termed it; he said it yesterday when he had a rendezvous with Mr. Zambini…"
She handed out a piece of clothing which seems to be my uniform!
I glared at her and threw the garments to the floor and fired up at once, "If this is the reason why he wants me up just to humiliate me, then I'm sorry Annie! Tell him he is an idiot for thinking that I would fall for such an atrocity!"
And with that I climbed back to bed and shut my eyes hard forcing myself sleep but before I could even think of the dreamland wherein I'd meet the face of my fiancé, Annie knelt beside my bed and bowed her head so low, her nose was almost touching the floor…
"Please…" she muttered her voice strained from her tears
I gaped at her, what the hell is she doing?
I got out of bed and stood beside her…"Annie--?"
But so suddenly she was on my feet, kissing them ceremoniously as if I was a goddess of some sort.
She startled me so much that for a moment I could do nothing but stare.
But when her voice cracked at the sound of her tears, I jerked my foot away instantly as if she was contagious.
"Annie please, get up….No! Please don't Annie, we can resolve this, why are you even doing this? Why are you reducing yourself to something as low as that? You are a pureblood remember?"
"Purity of blood doesn't matter to me, Hermione. To me it wouldn't be disgracing myself if I knelt before you"
I helped her sit up and I asked "Why Annie? What's wrong?"
She choked and coughed on her tears as she covered her face with her monster enormous hands.
As horrible as she looked, as filthy as her face was, as enormous her hands were, I actually felt pity for her and despite the comical figure she was projecting, I couldn't bring myself to laugh.
I remembered so well when I was in fourth year, creatures were treated like Annie was treated.
Only in Annie's case it was a lot worse because Annie is neither an elf nor a creature, she's a person.
Malfoy can be so damn sadistic….
"What's wrong, Annie?" I urged
She gulped and said, "Well, he told me that he would kill the remaining members of my family left if you wouldn't go up in my bidding and he told me he would fire me if you didn't wear that uniform, please Hermione just this once…I'll ask you that favor, my family means so much to me and working here is like salvation to me"
That's really weird, how could she think of this doomed place as salvation
However, I resigned and let out and exasperated sigh
"Well, no matter how convincing that may sound, I couldn't find it in my heart to believe that Malfoy actually has the heart to kill a person moreover, someone you consider dear to you and someone you consider a family…"
Annie looked at me, "You may be a very logical person, Hermione, you are very smart…yes, that is true but no, you failed to assess Draco's real personality for one, it is hard to discern and if you must know, Draco does not have a heart so he couldn't find a decision to kill anywhere except in the steady vengeance on his head for his lack of attention and real family and secondly, Draco has never had anyone who truly cared about him for him so he doesn't know how a real family works, so he wouldn't know how I'd feel if he killed one of my brothers or sisters. In short, Draco doesn't understand at all…."
I gaped at her, she understood so much….she knew so much, then why allow all of this to happen…
"I believe you could change all of that though, Hermione….I believe in you…" she said and with that she went out
I didn't know what she meant so I just stared after her…
No matter how Annie tried to convince me, I still couldn't say for sure that Malfoy would be able to give out that kind of verdict….
It just isn't him
But then I never knew him for that long, maybe there are darker sides of Malfoy I hadn't discovered yet.
I sighed, when is this going to end?
And if it indeed it would end, would the ending be favorable?
Would Harry still be mine?
I frowned as I recalled my last encounter with Draco Malfoy, I set it aside and opted not to think about it as I picked up the supposed uniform I was going to wear for Malfoy's eyes' fancy…
Damn! I couldn't believe I'm doing this…
No, I'm not doing this for anyone but Annie; I just hope it goes well.
I looked at the dress and noticed that some modifications were made, for one it was already colored dark emerald green with silver contours. Elegant, very elegant…if it weren't a uniform it could have passed something as what the lavish sluts would wear.
And do notice I emphasize the word sluts there.
When I wore it, I realize it had a snug fit and it wasn't that provocative and revealing anymore, but a bit of cleavage was exposed.
All in all, it looked like one of those French maids would wear for their masters, only this was green and silver and it had a deep neckline that showed the swell of my breasts, and of course it was more lavish….
I rolled my eyes
It was soooo typically…Malfoy…
Gladly the skirt wasn't hitched up so high or I would have protested, it was a skirt below the knee but it didn't reveal much…
I breathed in and prepared for the worst….
And stepped up on my way to Malfoy's dark chamber…
I breathed in and took an agitated step towards the profligate stairs of the Malfoys'
Troubled thoughts entered my mind as I drifted back to where Annie and I ended our conversation…
There had been countless times wherein he taunted me about killing Harry, yet I knew he could never lay a finger on Harry, he wouldn't dare.
It is not in Malfoy's nature to kill.
I can never tell…
It seems unlikely but there is a possibility
One could never doubt that
Back to matters first, I ordered myself
My head spun, dread washed over with every step I took, my stomach was churning either from hunger or from apprehension.
Perspiration swept over my protruding chest and itch swallowed my body as I began to feel the lacy details of Malfoy's so called uniform.
I began to hate the damned uniform more as I felt its hideous frills abrading my flesh as I made my way to Malfoy's room and my doomed fate.
Honestly, I'm in frills!
There is no way something good would come out of this encounter; something bad is bound to happen.
A heated argument is one that could happen in the least.
And even I couldn't handle that right now…
Damn you Malfoy!
Damn you to hell!
I exhaled deeply and let all of my exasperation out as I reached the final step and headed towards the doors of his room.
I breathed and rested my hand on the silver knocker which was located right below his name plate, hmmm…flashy.
I grasped the sliver knocker tightly and started to knock but before I could even do so, the door flung open hastily and rather harshly bringing me along with it. I banged my head on the door but gladly it wasn't that painful.
I was too shocked at the doors' sudden movement that it didn't even register to me that Malfoy was standing by the window, his right hand clutching or rather crumpling a piece or parchment. His back was facing me…
He was wearing the very same clothes he had on last night, except that he had a white polo shirt on, kind of similar to the one we used to have in school.
He turned around to acknowledge my presence and I noticed that he indeed had the a shirt on, but it didn't make any difference to what he wore last night as it was unbuttoned all the way down.
"It's rather rude to stare, mudblood"
I blanched and then I noticed him staring at my pathetic uniform too.
"Well, you are right, Malfoy, it is rude to stare which is why I'm wondering why you are doing it yourself"
I expected him to give a snide remark or give me one of his trademark smirks; I didn't expect him to be soooo quiet, as if he didn't care about my smart assed answer. I gaped at him and I noticed a flicker in his eyes….
Oh my God…
I've never seen him this angry before, I was too stunned at his silence that I didn't notice I was still grasping the silver knocker, I hastily let go and when I did the doors instantly closed.
When I looked back at Malfoy, I noticed he had his wand drawn; I began to be warier of my surroundings than I was when I first stepped into his room. As he passed by the furnace, he threw the parchment and the flames roared and hissed and he advanced toward me.
Oh no…
There seemed to be a manic gleam in his eyes that scared me…and then it all came to me
Malfoy was not angry, he was drunk
And this was a lot worse than an angry Malfoy
This intoxicated Malfoy was a lot worse than an angry Malfoy, as this Malfoy is perfectly unaware of what he is doing.
Don't get me wrong, I've seen Malfoy drunk the night before but that was different as he was in a sedate state, this is different…real different.
He smirked evilly and said, "Afraid, mudblood?"
Afraid? Oh God I was too afraid…
He took a few more steps, cornering me and trapping me
"I uh…please stop" I said pleadingly
He laughed scornfully, "Stop what?"
And with he roared even more…
I looked at him nervously
"I believe I asked you a question, mudblood"
I chose to ignore him and I stared down to the little toes of my feet which was lightly adorned with the silver sandals that came along with the uniform…..
I breathed erratically for about a minute, I almost thought Malfoy would back off and let me go…
I was so wrong
He huffed and said, "Look at me, mudblood…"
It was a harsh command with insult tainted on his voice but a gentle tone crept on his statement, but I didn't dare look up.
"I said, look at me, HERMIONE!"
The abrupt sound of my name made me jerk my head up and I saw his eyes…
His eyes told me so much about himself, and now it was very confusing…
As if he was trying to mask what he feels…
Or as if he was trying to fight off his desires
I couldn't really tell
He opened his mouth then closed it again…
He breathed heavily…
It was very apparent he was trying hard not to say something he wanted to say…
"You're such a fool…" he said
"What?"
He laughed more…
"You're just like that pathetic maid, Palace---"
When I heard Annie's name, rage filled me and I found the courage I hadn't mustered a while ago…
"While you little depraved people user! I can't believe you, Malfoy! First this uniform and now Annie Palace? How barbaric could you get! You would actually go to the extent of killing one of her family members just because you don't understand the principles—"
I broke off my monologue when I heard him snicker and chortle, I glared at him and continued…"God, Malfoy! I couldn't even believe it at first but—"
"Honestly mudblood, did you buy everything she said! Then hell you are not as smart as everyone thought you were back in school, now that we have come to that, I think I've got more brains than you do, you're so pathetic"
I gaped at him with my mouth open….
Realizations struck me all at once as I saw him smirking back at me somewhat superficially…
"Why that little--!"
"Bitch?" he offered casually
I just stared at him, I couldn't believe Annie…
I've been tricked by the schemer!
Uhhh! So much for pity!
I fumed and I pelted my anger towards the only man in the room…
"Well Malfoy, it doesn't change the fact that you have twisted principles, you're still vile and—"
He suddenly seemed angry again and something flared in his gray eyes…
He advanced more; pushing me into the corner I was trapped in…
"How dare you talk to me about principles, mudblood…when you can't even resolve your convoluted feelings right now! How dare you accuse me of that bullshit when you don't even realize what's happening to you!"
His voice was low but it held all the anger which made me shrink away and lose the remaining courage I had…
Malfoy had an overpowering stance, and his flexing muscles weren't helping either…
Judging his muscular chest and his toned arms, I'm guessing I wouldn't be so hard to choke…
I looked up at him and summoned a bit of courage, enough to muster the strength to say
"What particular principle?"
He heaved a sigh and said, "My oh my, mudblood, you were never that smart after all, for once I have to tell you, you are betraying yourself, why do you resist from my touches when in fact you know as much as I do that you want me as much as I'm craving you right now…."
He was not going there…
I didn't want to discuss this, not when it confused my deep contemplation about him yesterday night….
I looked down again, not meeting his gaze…
I don't want him to probe in into my most innermost thoughts…
To the fact of my admittance that I indeed want him…
"You're just horny"
"Look at me!"
I instantly did and he said, "You're eyes betray you, they tell me that you are lying, you do want me"
How could I make this any clearer to him, I had to change the subject…
Before he got to the point wherein I'd confide…
"You're not getting the point, Malfoy! Why are we even talking about that! We should be talking about this damned uniform—"
"THIS DAMNED UNIFORM! Well, mudblood if it doesn't suit you, then you best go naked!" he shouted angrily
And without warning, his huge hands came over me and tore the delicate material that covered my body. With one rip, he tore the bodice and I was left half naked…
The sound of ripping cloth broke my heart…
Why is he doing this!
Why is he making this so hard…?
I tried to stop him, but he was too strong
"Malfoy stop!"
I heard more ripping sounds…
Soon enough he'd leave me naked…
I sobbed, he was humiliating me…
Why are you so angry?
What did I do?
"Please stop!"
"Tell me why I should, mudblood! You're always complaining about this bullshit of a uniform right! Well I'll take back what's rightfully mine then!"
And with that I heard the loudest rip of all which came from my skirt and left me standing with my panties only…
I stared up at him and I expected to see his triumphant face, but I saw a blank look instead…
I was sobbing…
I tried to cover my breasts but….
"Leave it, I want to see what has been rightfully given to me by the dark lord!" he said harshly and he tried to pry my hands away from my chest…
'Haven't you done enough!" I cried and with all my strength I managed to fend him off or maybe he was a little concerned that he let go.
"Are you happy now? You've humiliated me enough, Malfoy! You're cold hearted and cruel, you will never understand how it is…how it is…"
I couldn't say it…
I don't want to say it...
"How it is to what?"
To love…
I looked at him, it would have relieved me to see him in a triumphant stance but instead I saw the same blank look.
It was all I could withstand; he never understood how it is…
And I resolved it, Malfoy would never understand that emotion…
The moment he humiliated me I understood, a man like Malfoy could never love…
I had to understand that
When he tore my uniform with no emotion but anger I told myself he wasn't capable of it…
He was a cold cynic…
He was a Malfoy
I broke down covering myself with my arms as if I didn't want to be tainted by his touch…
I cried and covered my face…
Why did he have to be so harsh!
Why did he have to do this…?
There was a long moment of pause wherein nothing could be heard except my steady sobs and his long intakes of breath…
Damn you, Malfoy…
I felt him kneel beside me but I ignored him and said, "You're a bastard…"
"Yes, and you're a mudblood" he countered
But I noticed the gentleness of his voice…
I didn't falter; I'm not going to fall for that…
"What have I done? Why do you have to humiliate me?" I asked still fighting the urge to look at him…
He didn't answer and so I said, "Idiot…"
I heard him chuckle and reach out for me but when he placed his hands on my arms I backed away, 'Don't you even think of touching me!" I hissed…
He withdrew his hand and I felt him sit down beside me….
"Hermione?" he whispered….his face so near to my ears…
"What!" I spat
"I'm sorry…"
For a moment I thought I'd gone deaf and I heard the wrong words…
So I looked at him disbelievingly and said, "What did you say?"
He looked at me with an impatient gleam in his eyes but he said it anyway,
"I said I was sorry…"
I looked at him scathingly and sardonically said, "Ha! You? Sorry? That's a laugh, Malfoy"
He just looked at me…
So I said…
"Well, just how sorry are you?"
He smiled and said, "How about I'll show you instead?"
Before I could utter a protest, his mouth found mine and he kissed me
No matter how much I hated to admit it, it was the apology I was definitely the apology I was looking for.
Lol, did Draco's plan work? You'll find out in the next chapter entitled Sorry... Thanks guys and Happy Holidays y'all! Anyway, I know it's not really that good compared to the other chapters especially now that I'm running out of ideas, I was hoping you would like it as demented as the chapter was, lol. Anyway, I'm not promising anything as the moment as I have a hard time writing this story because it was inspired when I was around fourteen and I'm like sixteen now, lol. Anyway, my apologies for this chapter but under strain and pressure it's the best I could offer, but it's really you guys that made me continue this, so I thank you very much! ;p