A/N: I was asked by one of my reviewers what Arnen was planning on doing with the crystal on the bridge. If you go back to the chapter Eavesdropping you will see that once Arnen let go of the crystal or lost her concentration when reciting a spell the crystal would explode. What Arnen was going to do was start a spell then throw the crystal at the Balrog before she finished. Thus, hopefully, the Balrog would die or be wounded enough for Gandalf to finish him. At that point she did not care if the others knew about her powers.

So, now that the secret is out and Gandalf is gone, shall we push forward…

Doubts

January 15, 3019 T.A.

The sun was high; the sky blue and wonderful. Light washed over the dale, causing the green of the grasses to seem lusher. Large slates of rock were scattered about, ranging from an ashen white to a blue grey. The time was one after the noon hour and the land was serene, though slightly disturbed by the agonized groans of its travelers. Nine companions, weary, pale, and broken, could not feel the warmth of the sun. The gentle wind only reminded them that there was wetness on their cheeks.

Legolas rubbed his shoulder where it had hit the wall of the mine in wonder. In his mind he saw over and over the image of the light engulfing Arnen, her shining eyes. Then, he thought of Gandalf falling into the shadow of the chasm. Her body surrounded by a globe of light bombarded his mind again; then, Gandalf's fingers letting go. The cycle of torture ran about his mind, threatening to drive him to madness with its grief and mystery.

His eyes wandered to where she sat, her knees pulled to her chest, her dark hair pulling loose from its band at her neck, cheeks streaked with tears and dirt, eyes lost. Thinking back to the challenge he made in the mine just a day ago, he laughed bitterly at the irony. She had warned him that he did not want to know all of her secrets. Indeed, she was right.

The elf looked to Aragorn, waiting for his orders. Though his heart cried out to be relieved of its ache, its burden, he knew that they had to move on. Mist blinded him. He blinked several times until the water made its way down his face. A burning lump sat in his throat. Legolas prayed silently for his companion to make his decision quickly.

Aragorn was on bended knee. One hand held his sword as the other cradled his face. Small sighs escaped from quivering lips; his shoulders shook. The ranger pushed damp hair away from his face and looked to the Mountains of Moria. Anor could be seen progressing across the sky. Slowly, he stood. About him the others were heavy with grief. Hating to do so, but knowing he must, he spoke.

"Legolas, get them up."

"Give them a moment, for pity's sake!" Boromir cried. "He's gone, and unnecessarily." The angry man turned on Arnen.

"Why did she not help him? In fact, how do we know she did not help that creature bring about his doom?" Boromir stalked to the woman. "She hid this from us; what else is there you hide, Arnen?"

Arnen abruptly stood. She watched Boromir stagger back at the intense glow pulsing from her orbs. Casting her gaze on the others she saw the suspicion, hurt, and fear in their faces. She knew she was no longer wanted. Bowing her head, she pulled up the cloak hood then covered her nose and mouth with the face mask. The maia turned toward the wood in the distance.

Aragorn said quickly, "Let us gird ourselves and weep no more! Come! We have a long road, and much to do."

While everyone got to their feet Aragorn ran to his sister.

"Arnen, wait," he pleaded, placing his hand on her shoulder. When she shook it off, he grabbed her and jerked her around.

"I said wait! Look at me! I do not know what it was that happened in the mines; I do know that it is no fault of yours that Gandalf is lost to us. I know that he and Elrond must have known about your…abilities before sending you with us. I know that if I had known about your abilities that day beside the river, I would have still taken you with me to Rivendell and naneth would have still adopted you."

Arnen pulled down the face mask. Her eyes bored into her brother's. She smiled dryly.

"No, Aragorn, you would not have even touched me. Instead, you would have fetched Elrond so he would decide what to do with me. Do not shake your head. I know you well, dear brother, and I know that you would have felt that where I was concerned, everything was above your knowledge."

Aragorn opened his mouth, but Arnen laid a finger against his lips.

"You are only human, Estel. I will lose no love for you because of that."

"And you," Aragorn whispered, "are you human as well?"

Arnen thought of telling him the truth. She so longed to share the secret with her brother.

'Do not breathe a word of this to him, Méla.' She could hear Irmo say.

'My lord, he should know. What good would come of not telling him?'

'There is a time for everything. You will not tell him, Méla, for if you do you will be called back and will never return to Middle-Earth.'

Arnen rubbed the scar above her eyebrow. She hated to lie to the man before her; he had been there for her whenever possible and he loved her dearly. Sadness crept into her eyes even when she realized what she was going to say wasn't a lie.

"I promise you that I am flesh and blood."

Everyone stole quick glances at Arnen. Aragorn had said she would come with them. What they saw in the mines did not change that. None questioned him; the spark in his eyes when he saw the objections rising silenced them all. Frodo was the only one who would watch her for long intervals before focusing on his feet again. She had removed the mask from her face but the grey hood was still raised. He wondered at the fact that her cloak was not torn after all the occurrences in Moria. It still looked as fresh as when he first saw it at Rivendell – an age ago.

"What are you thinking, Frodo Baggins?"

Startled by her voice, he looked up only to see her still facing forward. Focusing on where he was walking, the hobbit replied, "Should I fear you?"

"That is for you to decide, Frodo, not for me to tell you. Fear is an odd emotion. No matter if I tell you there is no reason to fear me you will regardless."

"So I should not fear you."

"Nay, you will not put hidden meanings with my words. I believe that your wisdom concerning judging character is far beyond your years. Whatever your initial feelings toward me were, trust those."

For some time after that, the Fellowship traveled in silence. They had all listened to the transaction between the woman and the hobbit. Each thought back to their experiences with her, hoping that they did not have to distrust their feeling of companionship toward Arnen.

The sun began to travel further and further toward his port. Ahead, there was a shimmering, as if the sunlight were casting its golden light upon a mirror.

"There lie the woods of Lothlórien!" said Legolas. "That is the fairest of all the dwellings of my people. There are no trees like the trees of that land. For in the autumn their leaves fall not, but turn to gold. Not till the spring comes and the new green comes do they fall, and then the boughs are laden with yellow glowers; and the floor of the wood is golden, and golden is the roof, and its pillars are of silver, for the bark of the trees is smooth and grey. So still our songs in Mirkwood say. My heart would be glad if I were beneath the eaves of that wood, and it were springtime."

I will end it here.