Chapter Nine - One Last Chance
Brooke stared down into her coffee. The swirling of the black liquid occupying all of her attention. She couldn't bear to get dressed like the others. She couldn't bear to do it because that way it would be real. That way she'd be giving up any hope of Lucas putting an end to the lavish ceremony. She couldn't help but let her thoughts drift to her best friend and what he'd be doing over at Haley and Nathan's right now. If he'd be talking to the other guys about how excited he was. Or if he'd be sat at the kitchen table, still dressed in what he'd gone to bed in, like her. Either way she couldn't manage to convince herself that he'd be having second thoughts about marrying Peyton. Either way she had to try and let go. It was like she was in a dormant state. Like the chaos going on around her wasn't happening. Like she couldn't hear the excitement of Peyton and her cousins in the other room. Like she couldn't see Karen and Haley rushing around, ensuring everything was on schedule. Just like she didn't see Rachel sit down in the chair opposite.
"So, I'm guessing you've given up then?" the red head didn't make an effort to speak quietly for the benefit of Brooke's alcohol induced headache
Brooke ran her hands through her silky brunette hair before looking back up at Rachel "Why? Does it not look like I'm making an effort?" she asked sarcastically as she gestured down at her white tank top, and pink checked pyjama bottoms. She hadn't made an effort. She hadn't made an effort to get changed. She hadn't made an effort to do her hair and make-up. She hadn't made one last effort to tell Lucas how she really felt
Rachel rolled her eyes at Brooke's sarcasm before leaning her head in across the table that separated the two "You've got four hours till the wedding…there's still time to stop this thing, ya know" she spoke a lot more quietly than she'd done previously, this time taking quick glances down the hallway to make sure no one could hear the words being exchanged
"Its over, Rach" Brooke stood up from her stool, and poured the remains of her coffee down the sink "All I can do now, is try and keep a hold of the last bit of dignity I have left…" she cleared her pots from the table as she tried hard to believe in her own words "…He's not in love with me" she admitted, the air hitching in her throat "I just have to let him go"
Rachel rose to her feet and clasped Brooke's arm as she pulled the brunette nearer her body "What if your wrong?" she hissed quietly "What if he's over at Nathan and Haley's confused as hell? What if he's having doubts about going through with this? What if he does love you, and he just needs that push to realise it?"
"And, what if I'm right?" Brooke whispered back, as the sound of voices filled the halls of Karen's house. Both, Brooke and Rachel trying to keep they're words unheard "What if he's over at Nathan and Haley's, blissfully happy at the thought of being married to Peyton? What if he's never been more sure of anything than making her his wife?" Brooke broke from Rachel's grasp and put the pots in the sink but Rachel didn't quit and followed her across the kitchen "I'm not gonna ruin his happiness"
"What about your happiness?"
Brooke folded her arms across her waist "Its not as important to me as his" she shrugged, before breezing past Rachel and out of the kitchen.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Lucas walked down the streets of Tree Hill. The sun shining brightly. The sky clear blue. They couldn't have picked a better day for the wedding. They couldn't have picked a better day because this was as perfect as it would ever get. He knew he'd been forbidden from going anywhere near the house. He wasn't suppose to step foot inside there in case he'd see Peyton in her wedding dress and bring bad luck on the rest of they're married life. But, when he'd spotted the dress Brooke would be wearing hanging in Haley's room, it had given him the perfect excuse to go down there and see if everything was going to plan.
He decided to enter through the door that adjoined his old room. That way there'd be less chance of getting caught. When he entered he expected to come face to face with a dozen false nails scattered across the floor. Or various different outfits hung on every door in sight. And, he was exactly right. Except, Brooke stood in the centre of all the clutter, dressed in nothing but black, lace underwear, clearly in search of the dress Lucas carried in his arms "Looking for this?" Lucas asked with a gesture towards the emerald green dress he held over his arm
Brooke jumped around and immediately darted for anything that could be used to cover her exposed skin "Lucas!" she hissed, as she desperately attempted to cover as much of her body as she could with the small knitted throw that she'd snatched up off Lucas' bed
"Relax" Lucas made no attempt to turn around "I've seen you a lot more naked than this before"
"Yeah, well, things are different now-" she whispered under her breath "And when have you ever seen me naked?" she shrieked, only now in full realisation of what he'd just said
"You lived here for like three years…you think I didn't ever catch a glimpse?" he raised his brow, as his grin became wider
"Mmmm, I would have been a little more careful, had I known I was living with a pervert" she joked back with a light hearted tone, all the while still holding the blanket tightly around her body as to not show anymore of her skin to Lucas
Lucas chuckled along with Brooke's words before reaching back and resting his hand on the door handle "Well, I'll leave with two thoughts in my mind…" he gave her a half smile "Your still pretty fine" his half smile turned to a cheeky grin, as the look between the two friends was held much longer than it ever should have been
There seemed to be such a feeling on both sides, and Brooke didn't know what to make of it. She swallowed hard before saying "What's the sec-"
"Mirrors" he smiled, and then he was gone.
Brooke turned around to find four different views of her uncovered backside in the mirrors that surrounded her. The mirrors that had been brought in there so the girls could see they're outfits from all angles. Until now, Brooke didn't know that Lucas had seen her from all angles too. From all angles in nothing but her underwear.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
"Brooke! Come quickly, we need your help!" Haley ran frantically down the hallway of Karen's house, as Brooke followed a lot more slowly and calmly.
When the two women arrived at the living room, Peyton was standing in her wedding dress, tear stained cheeks, and a visible rip in the back of the silky white material "What am I gonna do?" the curly blonde asked, whilst running her fingertips over the rip
"Surely, there's something you can do, isn't there, Brooke?" Haley pleaded "I mean, you work in fashion…you can sort this, right?"
Everyone's eyes turned to Brooke as she stood in one position. The thought of getting one over on Peyton entering her mind. Knowing that not helping Peyton in her time of need would give her some satisfaction "There's nothing much I can do…" Brooke told them, surveying the damage "I mean, even if I were to sew it up, you'd still be able to see it because the dress is made from silk…it might not even sew up at all" she shrugged, somewhere in her mind thinking this may be an excuse to postpone the ceremony. Brooke knew if it was her with a torn dress on her wedding day, she wouldn't even turn up to the church at all
"There must be something, Brooke" Peyton begged "I know we've hardly been the best of friends but please, please…there must be a solution. I cant get married in a torn wedding dress…" she held onto Brooke's arms as she pleaded "Please. If not for me, but for Lucas"
And, there it was. Her one weakness. Lucas. Lucas and her need to do anything to make him happy. There was something she could do. There was someway she could solve this problem. And, no matter how badly she wanted to out-do Peyton. She couldn't let Lucas down. She couldn't purposely go out of her way to make him unhappy. It was impossible for her to do "There is something"
Peyton's face lit up "What? Anything?" she asked with panic at the ceremony being just two hours away
Brooke drew a breath "Your gonna think I'm really sad…and desperate"
"As sad and desperate as Peyton looks right now?" Rachel quipped as Haley shot her an evil stare at her inability to be nice to Peyton. Even on her wedding day.
"I have another dress you can wear-" Brooke told them with reluctance "Years ago, I saw this beautiful wedding dress on sale, and I guess, I just fell in love with it and couldn't stop myself from buying it" the brunette informed the other women as they followed her through the halls of Karen's house
"Even though you didn't have a husband?" Rachel frowned "That is sad"
Brooke got to the closet in the spare bedroom, and rummaged through all the junk that was inside before she came to a bag. She carefully pulled the dress out and held it up to show the others "Brooke…its beautiful" Peyton whispered under her breath, as she ran her fingertips over the smooth silky material "I cant take this…" she shook her head "This is yours…"
"You need it more than me" Brooke handed her the dress, and offered a sweet smile that was laced with sadness
"But, wait, hasn't Lucas already seen this…its bad luck for him to see the dress before the wedding" Haley questioned, still bewildered by the elegance and beauty of the dress Peyton now held over her arm
"No, Luke doesn't know anything about it…he hasn't seen it" Brooke responded. The reason she hadn't let Lucas see it was because one day she thought she'd be wearing it in a ceremony where Lucas would be waiting for her at the alter
"Are you sure about this, Brooke?" Peyton asked
"Yeah…" Brooke breathed "Take it…I want you too" she told her. She didn't know if she was doing this for Lucas. Or if she was doing it for herself. Maybe by letting go, bit by bit, of the future she'd always imagined with Lucas she would let him go too. And, that's exactly what she needed to do now. Let go. Let go before she hurt herself even more.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Peyton looked beautiful. Even Brooke could admit that. Her hair pinned back in loose ringlets, and the wedding dress that fit her figure so perfectly creating a pool of white at her feet.
"You look beautiful" Brooke complimented, as Peyton stood alone in Lucas' old room, admiring herself in the many mirrors
"Thanks" Peyton smiled back "I cant believe its here already…the big day" she sat down on the end of the bed, as Brooke seated herself beside her "You know, I never thought I'd end up marrying Lucas…" she said more to herself than to anyone, but knew she needed to elaborate on her words after seeing Brooke's confused expression "His bad habits are virtually unbearable…" she joked, as Brooke let out a small laugh "I mean, the way he always leaves his sneakers at the bottom of the stairs or right in front of the door" she rolled her eyes, as Brooke nodded along, knowing exactly the kind of behaviour Peyton was talking of "Or the way he cracks his knuckles in bed…luckily I've managed to stop him from doing some of them but…oh god, the way he slurps soup through his front teeth-"
Brooke cut in "-Leave that one…it's a trademark move" she smiled, as Peyton agreed
"We can be friends, cant we?…You and me?" the curly blonde questioned after a moments silence "I know it would make Lucas happy…and me"
Could she be friends with Peyton? Could she ever really be friends with the woman that was marrying the man she loved? The man she was suppose to be letting go of? She didn't know the answers to the questions that were running through her head but she knew that she had to try "Friends" Brooke replied with a small, but true smile
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Lucas stood around the back of the church, a crumpled piece of paper in his hand. The piece of paper that had his hand-written vows scrawled across it in black ink. He was never good at memorising text. At memorising words. He'd always thought it would be so much easier on his wedding day though. He always thought the words would flow from his mouth without any trouble. He always thought the words would be as engraved in his head as the love would be in his heart.
"Please tell me your going to tuck your shirt in" Karen's voice broke Lucas from his thoughts
"Ma" he smiled, before enveloping his mother in a hug "You look amazing" he complimented her, looking down at her dark red dress
"Thank you" she replied
"How's Peyton?"
"She's fine. She and the girls are back at the house, making some finishing touches to they're make-up" Karen explained, taking a quick glance back to where there were crowds of people, champagne glasses in hand "Are you sure this is what you want?"
"Yeah"
"Are you sure that there is nobody else in this whole world you would rather be with than Peyton…there's nobody else, no matter how out of reach they seem?" she wasn't exactly hinting at Brooke, she just wanted to make sure her son knew what he was getting himself into
"No, mom" were the only words Lucas could think of saying. He knew why his mother was asking these questions. He knew that she'd been a little weary of how fast things had developed between himself and Peyton. He knew that his mother was worried he was making a mistake
"Then that's good enough for me" Karen smiled, knowing that Lucas wasn't exactly sure of his words. His eyes didn't show that same passion they did when he spoke of Brooke. His body language wasn't one of excitement like it was when he was around Brooke. Maybe it was the nerves kicking in? or maybe he was starting to have second thoughts about the wedding? Either way, Karen knew it wasn't over yet.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
He watched her like he'd done so many times before. He watched her as she chatted and laughed with friends. He watched as she would contentiously fiddle with her dress. He watched her do all the things she'd usually do. But, something didn't seem the same. Something didn't seem right. And, for once in his life Lucas didn't know what it was. He stood, hands dug deep in his pockets, silent and still behind his best friend as she looked out into the beautiful gardens that surrounded the church.
"You gonna say anything, or you just gonna stand there and stare?" she said, without turning to face him "You know, coz some people find that kinda creepy" She didn't know how she did it but somehow, someway, he didn't have to make a sound and she'd still know when he was there. She'd still feel his soft blue eyes focused on her
"And, you?" he made his way to her side
"I'm use to you being creepy" she joked, trying desperately not to let herself think of him in any other way except as a friend
"You look-" the air hitched deep in his throat "You look, like the most beautiful thing I've ever seen" he looked at her from head to toe. His eyes taking care to take in every curve of her body. Every inch of her beauty.
"Well, you dont look too bad yourself" she smiled, before turning and straightening his tie
"You do think I'm doing the right thing, don't you?" Lucas questioned, his eyes squinted as the sun shone brightly "Its just, these past few days, you haven't seemed like…you" Brooke looked at him confusion laced in her expression "Its like, ever since I can remember every laugh has come from the pit of your stomach…every smile has dimpled your cheeks…every quip has been teamed with a mischievous sparkle in your eyes…" he explained, getting a little lost in his thoughts of Brooke "And, I haven't been seeing that just lately…" he held her gaze, as she felt her knees and her ability to let him go weaken "I miss it"
"Me too" she said under her breath just loud enough for Lucas to hear
"Luke!" Nathan yelled across the gardens "They're ready for us" he gestured toward the door of the church
"Alright, gimme a second!" he turned back to Brooke as Nathan entered the church "Whatever it is, we'll sort it, okay?…we always do" he cupped his palm over the back of her head and pulled her into his open arms. Brooke buried her head and arms deep in his chest. Her eyes closed so tight. Her heart open so wide. She held onto him for what seemed like a lifetime. He held onto her for what seemed like even longer. Both of them knowing that this wasn't goodbye. Both of them wondering why it still felt that way "I'll see you in there" Lucas winked, before letting his hand linger in hers for a second
"Lucas" she called, as he instantly turned to face her. And, here it was. Her last chance. Her last chance to be truthful "I, I, I just had to tell you…I need to tell you…I-"
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I'll leave you guys with a little cliffhanger there. Please, please tell me what you think...and thanks for all the support so far, its been ammmazinnn!
Soph x