A/N: I know the last chapter was sad, even I have to admit that. And sorry this took a while. But thanks for all the reviews! Also, remember that this has nothing to do w/AWE!

Disclaimer: PotC is Disney's. If I owned it, it would be totally Sparrabeth:)

What am I going to do?! I love... both of them! I'm to be married to Will soon, but I can't pretend to love him completely for the rest of my life!

I stumbled into Tia Dalma's cabin a few minutes later, feeling terrible for Jack, and terrible because I could tell I was coming down with a nasty cold. Tia Dalma immediately saw my dripping state and handed me a mug.

Realizing that I was actually quite cold, I cupped my hands around the mug and felt the warmth seep into my body before I took a few grateful sips. It tasted like herb tea mixed with rum--an interesting and somehow delicious drink. Tia Dalma poured a sweet-smelling oil onto her hands and rubbed some on the cut on my throat and the hollow at the base of my throat.

"Against the illnessess that may befall you," she said. "You will need rest, of course."

"Jack and Will are working harder to be on time," I insisted. "For me. I want to help. I need to."

"You are troubled," Tia Dalma said. I sighed, and sat down on a corner of her bed as she stirred a bunch of dried flowers in a woven basket.

"Tia Dalma," I said slowly. "Have you ever fallen in love before?" She looked up.

"You are troubled," she said intuitively. "You are in love with two people. A man with whom you are engaged, and a man you cannot--a man you are forbidden to love."

"Forbidden," I said. Forbidden, yes. I shuddered to think of the consequences. They both loved me in return; they would kill each other for me. I felt horrible.

"I don't deserve them," I whispered. "Will has risked his life a thousand times to save me, and I'm here with my love divided between him and Jack. And I don't deserve Jack, either. What have I done to him before...?"

I looked at her desperately. "Tia Dalma, I'm going to fix this, but can I trust you to...?"

"It will be safe with me," she promised.

"Thank you. I can't bear to think what will happen to Jack if Will finds out... I can't pretend to love Will like I did before forever."

"Yes," said Tia Dalma. "But it is unfair that love for someone seems to always have to be restrained."

It occured to me as I walked slowly to my cabin that she had never answered the question--but from what she said, I could tell that she had fallen in love before. And it didn't seem as if it had ended all too happily.

But I had enough troubles of my own. I stepped into the cabin and immediately realized that I was not tired at all, so I appeared on deck a few moments later. I had to fix this, but already I could feel the hurt. I don't want to do this...

"Will," I said, trying my best to smile genuinely at him as I walked to where he stood pulling on ropes. You're supposed to love him, I told myself.

"Elizabeth, you should be resting!" he protested. I sighed inwardly. Hadn't anyone noticed I wasn't a "damsel in distress" anymore? Hadn't anyone noticed I had fought alongside the crew through the final battle to kill Davy Jones?

"I'm fine," I told him. "I came to help you. You must be tired."

"Only a little," he assured. He seemed to have started believing that I had no romantic relationship with Jack at all, and had relaxed a little.

"I can't wait for this to be over," I sighed, trying to sound dreamy and convince myself that I was dreamy. "We'll be married soon."

"If you'll still have me," said Will, evidently remembering that long-ago conversation we had had in the prison of Port Royal.

"Of course," I said, and all of a sudden it crashed down on me in an overwhelming wave. It was as if someone had really stabbed me in the heart--the pain was too hard to bear. I had really said it. I had really given it up. I had even considered breaking Will's heart just to have Jack. But of course, it would put him in utter danger, but did I have to hurt myself to convince Will?!

"Elizabeth?" Will asked. "Are you all right? Are you sure you don't need to go below?"

"I'm fine," I said, leaning heavily on the side of the ship.

He looked at me doubtfully, but said, "As you wish."

"I'll go trim the sails," I said slowly.

"Be careful," he said. "Last time was close. I can't lose you again."

"Don't worry," I said.

He smiled. "I love you, Elizabeth."

I tried to smile back, but I could tell it was weak.

"I love you, too," I whispered. It was so hard saying it; the words stopped halfway in my throat and I fought to get them out. I couldn't put Jack in danger like this. How many times was it already?

I climbed the rigging slowly and carefully, clearing my head as I went to make sure I didn't do something stupid again.

A long silence descended on the Pearl as I started to work. I heard Jack humming "A Pirate's Life for Me" at the helm, watching the horizon. How often I stood so close to that spot, watching that same horizon. It was almost night now, the sky a dusty purple above and crimson at the mysterious line where the sea met the sky. The stars sparkled above me, faithfully watching over us.

Was it possible that my father could be under that same sky, seeing the same exact stars, from so far away? What would he think if he knew his daughter was not dead, but alive and (for the most part) well, a crew member aboard the ship of one of the most infamous pirates in the Caribbean?

And I could tell how hard it was for Jack. How hard it was for pirates to live now--and why Jacik wanted to be immortal. And why exactly Jack wished so much for me to fall in love with him. Pirates were now outcasts in society--we didn't have any other way to live. We're human too! I thought. And I could see how hard it was, how desperately he wanted to be someone, to have someone, to have a place in the world...

And if I could tell him what he wanted. Can't I just let him know? But I knew I couldn't--it would be a miracle if Will did not find out.

I will change this, I thought. I'll stop loving--But the thought of him being alone in the world was too much to bear.

I was just about to secure a rope when something hit the starboard side hard. The Pearl rocked violently, throwing me off guard.

"We've reached the destination!" I heard Jack yelling to someone on deck.

"Drop anchor!" Anamaria screamed.

"What's this thing under us?" roared Gibbs.

I saw Jack open his mouth to answer, but at that moment the "thing" slammed another attack on the starboard side, and everyone was thrown sideways. I pulled out my knife to keep a hold on the mast, but my feet lost their grip.

I kicked hard, hoping to find something to hold on to. I was at the highest point on the ship, which was highly inconveniently tilted on its side. Something sharp and jagged rose out of the water right underneath me, and I was hanging with one hand onto a single rope, dangling precariously.