Orochimaru seems to have accepted Jirobo and Tayuya as special guests, and now he plans to show them his latest craze. What is it that Orochimaru plans to show them /really/? What kind of madness awaits the two future siblings on this insane and worrysome night? Only the play can tell...
Disclaimer: I'm working on it, but it doesn't look like I can own Naruto or RHPS. I guess I'll get over it, but until then, on with the show.
Act 3 Scene 1
The Shinobi applaud with much zeal. Kabuto and Kidomaru close in on Jirobo and Tayuya. Kabuto begins to remove Jirobo's damaged and torn clothing while Kidomaru tries, while dodging Tayuya's punches, to remove hers. Jirobo and Tayuya were too suprized that they would even think it to really fight them off. Both stand there scowling, as the Shinobi gaze upon them, showing their impression. This goes on for what feels like forever.
Tayuya: "Fuck. Now look at us."
Jirobo: "Stop cursing Tayuya. It's not as bad as it looks, I hope. Let's just...go along. This Orochimaru guy sounds mad. Mad and dangerous. We shouldn't try to run off now."
Tayuya: "What, you don't want to run outside anymore now that you're in your underpants? Damn, someone put some clothes on this guy..."
Jirobo then turns to Sakon, who appears to be observing him very intently.
Jirobo: "Er, hi. Yeah, up here. Hi. My name is Jirobo, and this is...Tayuya. And you are...?"
Sakon: "You are very lucky to be invited as guests up to Orochimaru's laboratory. Some people get chopped up and hauled up there for parts and sacrifices."
Kabuto opens the cage doors of the lift, and several of the Shinobi begin to crowd in.
Jirobo: "People get sacrificed?"
Sakon: "I've been there. Seen it."
Sakon then escorts the two to the lift. Kabuto tosses out two of the Shinobi to make room for them and then slams the door behind them. As the lift begins to rise, Jirobo and Tayuya are pushed against the crate, now irritably staring straight ahead.
Tayuya: (to Kidomaru) "Is it, I mean he, Orochimaru, your father?"
Kidomaru: "What? Hell no. I don't think he ever had or ever will have kids. I mean really." Kidomaru smirks. "We're simply his servants."
Tayuya: "But why?"
The lift comes to an abrupt halt, and when the cage slides open, the question is immediately dismissed as everyone makes for the lab entrance. The lab is actually rather organized, though still dark and dusky, with those ever-present jars of body parts lined up neatly on the walls and a coffin here or there. There is a massive freezer on the wall to one side, closed and forgotte-looking. In the center of the room there is a massive tank, but it isn't as much shallow as it is long. Above it hangs a candle-holding chandellier that provides little light, but the lab is illuminated enough so that everyone and everything is quite visible. Several important books are laid out with information valuable to reviving the near-dead. Many of the sections are marked on the exposed pages.
There are several gifts about the tank, like a sword, several weapons, and special summoning scrolls. They are intended for Kimimaro. The Shinobi await near the entrance of the lab, a little too frightened to get too close. Orochimaru, now dressed in a more fitting konoha-nin vest and all, prepares to speak to his guests.
Orochimaru: "Sakon, Kidomaru, go and assist Kabuto."
The two move past the other Shinobi and join Kabuto at a table by the tank, where one book in particular is opened to a proper page, and several ingredients to make the jutsu in store possible are laid out.
Orochimaru: "I will entertain...ah..."
Jirobo and Tayuya step out of the lift.
Jirobo: "I'm Jirobo, and this is my sister-to-be Tayuya."
Orochimaru: He takes Tayuya's hand to kiss. "Hmm...How nice. And what charming underclothes you both have." He smirks and takes two dust coats from Kabuto, handing them to Jirobo. "But here, put these on. They'll make you feel less vulnerable."
Orochimaru makes his way to the tank by Kabuto and Kidomaru, who are busy flipping through the book and arranging things.
Orochimaru: (to Shinobi) "It's not often we receive visitors here, let alone offer them hospitality."
Jirobo: "Hospitality! All we wanted to do was use your phone. You'd think it was a crime to ask."
Tayuya: "Jirobo...remember 'people get chopped up and hauled.' Don't talk to this guy like that..."
Jirobo: "But seriously! You get what I mean, right? I'm not the only one, right?"
Tayuya: "Shut up, retard!"
The room then goes quiet, as all the Shinobi look to Orochimaru, waiting for a reaction. Orochimaru then breaks into a smile.
Orochimaru: "How brave you are, Jirobo. A perfect specimen of shinobi-hood. So strong."
Kidomaru and Sakon laugh.
Orochimaru: "You must be a little jealous of him, Tayuya."
Tayuya: "Bah. I don't need size or strength. I have this." She shows her flute off for a second before putting it away again. Orochimaru shows a hint of impression before returning his attention to Jirobo.
Orochimaru: "Do you have any blood limit?"
Jirobo: "Well...no."
Orochimaru: "Oh well. How about you, Tayuya?" He laughs
Kabuto is behind Orochimaru, looming there.
Kabuto: "Everything is ready, Orochimaru-sama. On your cue"
Orochimaru: "Yes." He goes back towards the tank, standing before everyone. "Am I speaking clearly enough? Can you hear me there in back? Good. Tonight, my unconventional conventionists...tonight you are about to witness a breakthrough in the science of forbidden jutsus."
Everyone but Kabuto, Jirobo, and Tayuya gasps.
Orochimaru: "A new body will be mine."
Everyone claps. Tayuya is about to clap, unsure, but Jirobo indicates that she shouldn't.
Orochimaru: "It was strange the way it happened, one of those quirks of fate really. One of those moments when you seem irredeemably lost: you panic; you're trapped; your back's against the wall. There's no way out, and then suddenly, you get a break. All the pieces seem to fit into place. How lost you've been. What a fool. The answer was there all the time. It took a small accident to make it happen. An accident!"
Kidomaru and Sakon step behind Orochimaru.
Both: "An accident?" They both look at each other with a smirk, as if they didn't believe him.
Orochimaru: "That's how I discovered the secret. That elusive ingredient, that roadway to a never-ending life. But tonight, I bring back to life a subject, whom I have taken a fancy to, and will be that ingredient I have so longed for."
Shinobi applaud.
Orochimaru: "You see, Jirobo and Tayuya, you are fortunate, for tonight is the night that my favorite subject is revived to full health; the subject whose body I plan to take as my own."
Everybody applauds except for Jirobo and Tayuya, who are too shocked to really believe such things. Orochimaru then uncovers the tank as Kabuto then takes his side, ready to assist his master with the proceedings. Inside the tank, suspended in clear fluid, is a bandaged body, preserved.
Orochimaru: "Prepare the sacrifices!"
Kabuto brings out two people bound in tight ropes, both too weak to fight back.
Orochimaru: "The ritual begins!"
Orochimaru stands back, now performing the forbidden jutsu that would help revive the subject. Kabuto assists by taking the two sacrifices, and the deed is soon complete, which leaves the Shinobi astonished, Kidomaru and Sakon awed, and Jirobo and Tayuya horrified. The liquid in the tank drains away and the bandaged figure begins to rise.
Tayuya: "Jirobo..."
Jirobo: "It's alright, Tayuya." He gulps.
Orochimaru climbs up one side of the tank while Kabuto climbs the other. Kimimaro gets up in the tank, arms stretched forward. Both Orochimaru and Kabuto take the bandages off of his head. Kimimaro looks at both of them, but then leaps up and grabs a hold of the chandellier. Orochimaru frowns as he tries to retrieve him, but Kimimaru swings forward and lands before the tank, facing the Shinobi.
Act 3 Scene 2
Song: Sword of Damocles
Kimimaro: "The Sword of Damocles is hanging over my head."
Orochimaru jumps down from the ladder, but the purple rope tying his robe gets caught on it, causing him to fall. Kabuto is too busy trying to keep from laughing.
Kimimaro: "And I've got the feeling someone's going to be cutting the thread. Oh, woe is me. My life is a misery. Oh, can't you see that I'm at the start...of a pretty big downer..."
As Orochimaru gets level with him, he lunges for Kimimaro, but he lands inside the tank because Kimimaro simultaneously abandons the tank area all together, jumping between Kidomaru and Sakon who now each have a pair of kunai with which they will cut out his arm and leg bandages.
Kimimaro: "I woke up this morning with a start when I fell out of bed."
Shinobi: "That ain't no crime." (including Kabuto, Kidomaru, and Sakon)
Kimimaro: "And left from my dreaming was a feeling of un-nameable dread."
Shinobi: "That ain't no crime."
Kimimaro: "My high is low. I'm dressed up with no place to go. And all I know is I'm at the start..of a pretty big downer.
Orochimaru, who has caught up with Kimimaro now, tries to put his arm around his neck, but Kimimaro easily slides free. Kidomaru and Sakon hang on to the end of Kimimaro's chest bandages as he comes free.
Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."
Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."
Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."
Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."
Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime, That ain't no crime."
Kimimaro is now unbandaged as he strikes a very elegant pose. During the last sequence, Orochimaru climbs out of the tank onto Kabuto's shoulders and purses Kimimaro, but they fall.
Narrator: (Me, reading from script) "Rock-I mean Kimimaro-needed peace of mind. He didn't know he was doing just fine. He was the product of another time. And as for feeling down - Well that's not a crime."
Orochimaru and Kabuto are recovering from the fall while Kimimaru begins to go around the Shinobi.
Shinobi: "That ain't no crime."
Kimimaro: (To first group of Shinobi.) "The sword of Damocles is hanging over my head."
Shinobi: "That ain't no crime."
Kimimaro: (To second group.) "And I've got the feeling someone's going to be cutting the thread."
Shinobi: "That ain't no crime."
Kimimaru: (To third group.) "Oh, woe is me. My life is a misery. (to fourth group) Oh, can't you see that I'm at the start...of a pretty big downer..."
Kimimaro then breaks into a run as Orochimaru has recovered and sets after him. He continues to chase Kimimaro.
Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."
Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."
Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."
Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."
Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime, That ain't no crime."
Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."
Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."
Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime."
Kimimaro: "Oh, no no, no no."
Shinobi: "Sha la la la! That ain't no crime, That ain't no crime."
At the end of number, Kimimaro has climbed up the ladder attached to the end of the tank and Orochimaru is in a heap below. Kabuto is behind the tank and Kidomaru and Sakon in their positions in front of it.
Narrator: And that's all for chapter four! I thought it was okay for Kimimaro to sing Sword of Dimacles. Was it? Aww who cares? It all still rocks. But what shall happen in chapter five? Tune in, my good friends. All in good time. From my perspective, Orochimaru does look a little pissed off, having to chase Kimimaro around, but if he needs him so badly...he just might forgive him. XD