Stinking Shurikens

Disclaimer: All characters, songs and scenes belong to their respective owners...

Chapter 2: Not a Pikachu

A/N: In this fanfic, there are characters who are not who you expect.

Three Jonins were trying to hold on to a struggling man wearing sunglasses as they entered the station...

"You got to believe me, I'm innocent! I did not peep into the girls' bathroom! Honestly!"

The man sees Sasuke and Neji at the desk.

"It's those guys on the paper! One f-k-up I can understand! Two even, but f-ing three? You guys are f-ing losers!"

"Come on, Ebisu!" The Jonins pulled Ebisu away...

Sasuke and Neji watched the scene. "I hate this f-ing night job."

Neji picks up a multi-colored pen. "Say, don't you think this pen is interesting? Four colors in one."

"Yeah, but what is the green for?" asked Sasuke. "No one uses the green color."

"But it does pose an interesting question," said Neji. "So, who's Sakura Haruno?"

Sasuke gives a glare at Neji. "Come on, Neji! Do I ask you how you and your wife get along at home?"

Neji grinned. "Well, we're getting along really fine. Been shaking things up in the bedroom when Tenten learned how to make me feel her org..."

"Forget that I asked that question," said Sasuke.

"Who's Sakura Haruno?" Neji asked again.

Then, a woman's voice spoke out. "That would be me." Neji and Sasuke saw a pink-haired woman, who was with Kiba and Shino.

"So, you're here to insult us in person now, Sakura?" Sasuke asked.

Sakura raised her hands that were handcuffed.

"What's going on?" Sasuke asked.

"It appears that Miss Haruno was blackmailing Mr. Sarutobi," Shino explained "Her fingerprints were found on an envelope in the car."

"So, there is a Pikachu watching over us." Sasuke grinned and then took Sakura by the arm. "Please, let me deal with her processing."

Sasuke pulled Sakura to the interrogation room. "You never lost your touch," mumbled Sakura.

As Neji watched the two, he looked at Shino and Kiba. "How did it happen?"

"She was an ex-ANBU," explained Kiba.

"A very disgruntled ex-ANBU," corrected Shino.

"So, she blackmailed Sarutobi, was an ex-ANBU and writes for the 'Konoha News', that will put her in there for three years and something that newspapers would like to hear."

"Yeah, but wait till the papers find out that she used to f-k with your partner," said Kiba.

Sasuke was getting Sakura's fingerprints.

"Obviously, we have these on your old file," said Sasuke as he smirked.

"Just do your job, Sasuke."

Sasuke then said, "Sakura, between you and me, we've really finished that businessman off, didn't we?"

"What are you talking about?" Sakura asked with a disgruntled voice.

Shino and Kiba were about to leave.

"Gentlemen, I would like to officially retract that contemptuous glare I've given you in the corridor this afternoon," Neji said, "So, how's the Jiraiya case going?"

"We're...reviewing the evidence," Shino replied.

Sakura was being prepared for a mug shot.

"A little bit more to the back, Sakura." Sakura moved back. "Now, a bit to the left." Sakura moved to the left. "Now, just show a bit of cleavage..."

Sakura sends a death glare at Sasuke's camera, and Sasuke took the photo.

Sasuke puts Sakura in a cell. "So, what time do you want me to bring breakfast?"

"You know this is bullshit, Sasuke. I didn't send any photographs, I only sent a disk."

"A disk? What was on it?" Sasuke asked.

"What?" Sakura spoke with surprise in her voice, "Now you're suddenly interested?"

"Did you keep a copy?"

Sakura looked at Sasuke. "Yeah, right. I'm not that much of an idiot, Sasuke."

Neji was at the desk when Sasuke walked by with Sakura's belongings.

"Neji, after work, we'll be heading to Sakura's apartment."

"Why? She's still got some your CDs?"

"Yes. But now that I got her keys..." Sasuke takes out the keys to Sakura's apartment.

"Gotta Catch Em All," Neji said.

Sasuke and Neji entered Sakura's apartment.

"So, Sasuke, exactly as the way you left it?" Neji asked.

"Can we make that the last of our comments, Neji?"

"I understand, Sasuke."

Neji was checking Sakura's computer. "Nothing. Not a Pikachu. Not even a screw. Zero...zilch. "

Sasuke was checking out Sakura's music CD collection. "Man, what kind of music does she listen to? KPop. JPop. Pokémon Music?"

Neji switches the computer off. "Nothing. And there's no disks. It could be anywhere..."

Sasuke looked at Neji. "Anywhere, you say, Neji?"

Sasuke was holding Neji up to a lamp high up in the ceiling.

"Found anything, Neji?"

"Well, I found her passport and her bankbook." Neji checked the lamp. "Hey, what's this?"

"What is it, Neji?"

"It's a photo of you and Sakura."

Sasuke was trying to keep his balance as he was on a chair on a dining table, holding Neji up.

"Neji, you're really f-ing pushing it!"

"No, I'm serious, here." Neji drops the photo to Sasuke and as Sasuke caught the photo, he lost his balance. It felt like an eternity as Sasuke look at the photo of himself and Sakura in their Jonin uniforms and he landed his back on the floor.

"I thought she burned all of these?"

"Sasuke!" Neji called out as he was hanging from the ceiling lamp.

"Shit, Neji!" Sasuke quickly got up.

"You could use that ladder in the corner," said Neji.

Sasuke sees a ladder. "Since when did you know that there was a ladder?" Sasuke asked.

"Since we came in."

Sasuke facefaulted.