Disclaimer: We own nothing

A/N: Joy of joys, it's my (TooLittleTooLate's) turn now. This is the chapter where it ALL happens! Violence, humor, anger, injury, betrayal, and so much more!! Interested? Good! Now I'll let you read this absolutely amazing chapter!!

Reno looked over to the lunch line to see how Elena was doing with her part of the operation. Pleased to see that she had successfully engaged Vincent in a conversation, he turned his attention back to Rude.

"This is goin' to be so great! He's never going to see it coming," Reno all but squealed.

"Are you sure this is smart?" Rude asked, looking for their intended victim.

"Smart? Who cares if it's smart, all I care about is that it's going to show him why no one should ever mess with a Turk," Reno said. Rude shook his head and went back to sitting quietly.

"It's about time he got here. I was worried that he wouldn't show up," Reno got up. "You all set? When he gets outta the lunch line, wave him over, got it?"

Rude nodded his understanding and waited for Zack to leave the line. Rude was actually surprised by Reno's forethought in this plan. He had thought of everything, including a way to stop Zack from lingering in the line too long talking to Vincent. That's what Elena was for.

Zack stepped out of the line and looked around for a few seconds before spotting Rude, who was waving him over. Shrugging to himself as to why the bald Turk would want to sit with him, he made his way over.

"Hey there Rude," Zack smiled. Rude nodded in greeting. "How's Reno? He didn't look too good the last time I saw him."

"That'll happen when his weapon is replaced with a toy while he's on a mission," Rude said.

"Look, I didn't know that's what Vincent was going to do. I didn't want Reno to get hurt…this whole think has gotten out of hand," Zack sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. "I'm thinking of just apologizing and calling this stupid prank war off."

"You're…what?" Rude asked in amazement. He thought they were both too immature to ever come to a conclusion like that.

"It's just not worth it anymore. You think he'll hear me out?" Zack asked hopefully. Rude stared at him, wishing desperately that he didn't have to do what he was about to do.

Maybe he could get Reno to come over so they could talk. Looking past Zack towards Reno he saw the redhead frantically motioning to get on with it. He was making ridiculously over exaggerated killing motions.

He wasn't being very discreet; someone was going to notice the flailing red-head soon. And when they did, they would probably alert someone…like Tseng.

Aw crap, Tseng! Reno didn't think about having to escape him. When he finds out about this, there's going to be hell in the office. Delilah's really going to get a work out.

Deciding that he could no longer ignore his partner, Rude figured it was better to just get on with it.

"Sorry Zack, I don't really want to do this," Rude said as he stood quickly and pulled the table release.

Before Zack could fully process what Rude had said, the table folded in half and his lunch was in his lap. He looked from his lap to Rude in disbelief.

Suddenly there was some shouting coming from the drink machines. Hojo was pushing his assistants aside so that he could get a better look at what was happening. Smiling with glee at the sight of the SOLDIER covered in food, he couldn't stop himself from bouncing on the balls of his feet.

Zack shoved his chair away from the table, sadly he pushed too hard and the chair fell over backward. He closed his eyes as he crashed to the floor. A shadow came over him and he opened his eyes to see Reno staring down at him.

He had never seen him looking so happy before. Even behind Reno's black eye, Zack could see his green eyes twinkling with delight.

"You said it was on. So now I'm bringing the heat," Reno said, bringing his arm from behind his back.

Zack got a split second to look at what looked like a gallon size zip-lock bag of white goop. Before he could register what Reno was going to do, a big, chunky blob of cottage cheese landed on his head and chest.

And it wasn't just cottage cheese, oh no. It looked like Reno had been saving it in his pantry for at least three months. It had a funky green tint to it and smelled worse than that sweaty gym sock he had found after losing it for two weeks.

Still staring up at Reno as he laughed like a maniac, Zack retracted his statement of wanting to apologize to the red-headed menace. Suddenly Reno stopped laughing and turned his head slowly to the right.

Almost as if a light bulb had gone on, his grin fell and he motioned to Rude to run for it. Rude followed his gaze and walked away as quickly as he could. Reno gave one more amused look at Zack and booked it.

The sound of hurried footsteps reached his ears. Tseng had run over and began pulling the young man to his feet.

"I'm very sorry for Reno's behavior," Tseng muttered while attempting to brush Zack off. Realizing it was a lost cause he stopped and glared at the door Reno had disappeared through. "I'll make sure this doesn't happen again."

Zack just stared in awe at the fact that TSENG had helped him up. Unable to think of anything intelligent to say, he settled for nodding.

Tseng wiped his hands on a napkin and walked towards the swinging door. With more force than was necessary, he shoved the door open and walked out of the lunch room.

When the door swung back everyone could see Tseng 'power walking' down the hall. The door swung again to reveal Tseng sprinting down the hall. The third and final swing showed an empty hallway.

All the employees looked at each other nervously, no one ever wanted to see Tseng running. It usually meant something really bad was happening or about to happen.

Zack was still staring at the door when two people walked by catching his attention. It was Seph and…Holt?!

What are they doing together? Seph doesn't even like him! He better not think this was my fault and be thinking of replacing with that…that…wanna be SOLDIER!!

As the onlookers started to wander away, Zack felt utterly crushed. He couldn't believe Seph would do that to him. Unable to think of what else to do, he made his way over to his and Vincent's headquarters.

Just as he was about to walk in a towel hit him in the face, accompanied by a voice growling out "get out of my kitchen." Turning on his heel, he left to go get cleaned up. Obviously Vincent didn't want his kitchen dirtied.

-------

As he approached the door to his office, Seph's secretary came running around from behind her desk. She was clutching a dark blue sticky-note. She handed it to him wordlessly and walked quickly back to her desk.

There's something seriously the matter with her, Zack thought. Oh yeah, I'm covered in rancid dairy product.

Zack walked into his office and found a relatively clean towel to start cleaning himself off with. Once most of the food had been wiped out of his hair and off his shirt, he sat down at his desk to read the note from Seph.

Heaving a sigh when he saw that the note was written in black ink on dark blue paper, he tilted the paper to try and make the light show the letters clearer. After a few seconds of strategic moving, he finally got it.

Zack, we're leaving in the morning for a short mission. When we get back, I expect this little 'fight' to be over.

Sighing, he threw the sticky-not away and got up to go talk to Vincent. If he was leaving for a few days, he had to be sure Reno wouldn't try to take anything from his office. The last thing he needed was Seph on his case because his office had been broken into.

-------

"So, you think Reno's going to attempt to break into your office?" Vincent asked, resting his hands on the tomato crate they were using for a desk.

"Well, yeah. Don't you think he might try to?" Zack asked, looking over Vincent's shoulder.

"Of course I think he might. He's a Turk, an atrocious one, but still a Turk," Vincent said. Noticing Zack's curious expression he followed his gaze. He was staring at Vincent's tower of canned peaches. "What? I like peaches, now pay attention."

"Sorry, I just didn't peg you as a peach man," Zack tore his eyes away from the peaches. "So, what're we gonna do?"

"We won't do anything on the offense; instead we'll do something on the defense. We'll rig your office so that if he does try to get in, Tseng will know," Vincent said.

"How are we going to rig my office? We can't set it up to explode, I don't think Seph would like that very much," Zack said, looking worried.

"There are other ways to set traps without needing to blow things up. I was thinking more along the lines of dropping something on him, should he open the door," Vincent replied.

"Like something heavy?" asked Zack.

"No, like something sticky; that won't come out of his hair," Vincent looked around for some inspiration.

Noticing a jar in the far corner, he got up and walked over to it. Bending down to get a better look, he let out a low chuckle. He picked the jar up and brought it back over to their desk and set it down in front of Zack.

"We'll put this in a bucket and position it so that if anyone opens your door, it'll fall. Just remember to lock the door so that someone else doesn't get it," Vincent said, smiling like crazy.

"Maple syrup?" Zack asked, reading the label. He looked up at Vincent, wondering if this was really the right way to go with it. One look at Vincent's creepy smile and Zack decided it was better not to question the man.

He was really beginning to wonder of Vincent was losing it.

-------

Zack awoke the next morning three hours before they were supposed to leave on their mission. He wanted to make sure that nothing would go wrong to make Seph even angrier at him.

He got dressed quickly and rushed out to the air ship. Making sure that everything that needed to be packed had been packed, he went searching for the pilot. Rounding the front of the plane, he spotted a man leaning against the craft smoking.

Figuring this was the pilot, he approached the blonde man.

"Hey there, you the one flying us today?" he asked, being as friendly as possible. The man looked at him for a moment before replying.

"Looks like it, doesn't it? I mean, no one else is here with an air ship, are they?" the man asked, taking another drag from his cigarette.

Zack tried not to look affronted by the man's tone, and decided to just end the conversation quickly.

"What's you're name, anyway? I don't think I've seen you fly here before" Zack said.

"Name's Cid and I have flown for ShinRa before. Just 'cause you haven't seen me doesn't mean I haven't," the man said gruffly.

"I just wanted to make sure you were all set and knew where we were going," Zack defended himself.

"Well I do, so you can stop your worrying," Cid replied sharply.

"Okay, Cid, just making sure. I'll let you get back to…whatever it was you were doing," Zack said. He turned to walk back to the bags.

He double and triple checked that they had everything they needed. When he was satisfied that everything was there and neatly packed, he carefully put it all in the air ship. Turning around from putting the last bag in, he saw Seph standing there with a look of disbelief and surprise on his face.

"Well, this is unexpected Zack. What made you decide to be so efficient this morning?" Seph asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Nothing, sir, just doing my job," Zack saluted. He was actually amazed that he remembered how, it had been years since he had last done it. This, of course, didn't go unnoticed by Seph.

Shrugging and deciding to keep a close eye on his second-in-command, Seph got into the air ship. Zack sighed in relief, he had been sure that he was going to be questioned about his strange behavior. Maybe he was over doing it a little, but he wanted to be sure not to give Seph a reason to get upset with him.

Hoping that their assignment wouldn't take too long, Zack climbed in after Seph and closed the door. As the engines warmed up, he thought about the bucket of syrup hanging over his door.

He prayed to Shiva that Reno wouldn't try to get into his office. He really didn't want to explain how syrup had gotten all over his floor and paperwork.

A/N: Okay, so I lied at the beginning, this chapter didn't have almost any of the things I mentioned. Hopefully it had humor, and it kinda had betrayal…but that's about it. Well, look forward to the next chapter, which will most likely be way better! But review this one too please!!