Chapter 4

"Joint…joint custody, wha….. what are you thinking, are you crazy?"

Eyes wide with anger, hands still resting stubbornly on her hips, Elizabeth raised an eyebrow, "Excuse me? What is so crazy about joint custody?"

Lucky could not believe what he was hearing. Elizabeth, his fiancée, was contemplating sharing her child with Jax. The man who had been nothing but a pain in the ass ever since this whole surrogacy bullshit started and she wanted to know what was so crazy about the idea. They had agreed that the child deserved to live in a household with two parents, not being shuffled around from home to home every other week. They were supposed to get married, make him the legal father, and get rid of fancy pants-corporate raider-smooth talking-lady lovin Jasper Jax. Not make him a permanent fixture in their lives. What the hell was she thinking?

Moving closer to her with confusion etched all over his face Lucky asked, "What do you mean, what is so crazy about that?" He placed a hand on his chest as he stood inches from her in front of their couch/bed while he continued to rant "We were supposed to raise this child as our own, you as the mother and me as the father. If you agree to joint custody, Jax will do everything in his power to make sure that I have nothing to do with this child."

Being this close to him while she was so angry with him was starting to make Elizabeth feel uneasy. She never wanted to hit someone so bad in her life. Well, except for the time that Courtney stole Jason from her, and there was that time when she found Lucky in bed with her sister, and who could forget the time when…. Ok so she had wanted to hit a couple of people a couple of times, but she was different now. She didn't ease her anger with someone by taking a cheap, but well needed, shot at slapping them right across the face. She was a grown woman with a child, and another one on the way. So what if Lucky was looking at her like she had just lost her ever-loving mind, and she was the stupidest person in the world. She would just have to control her anger, and make her pigheaded fiancé see her point of view, whether he liked it or not, because in all reality she was the one with the bun in the oven, not him.

Moving around was always a good thing for her. It allowed her to think, it allowed her to put distance between herself and an unwanted object. And at that moment Lucky-I-Know-Everything Spencer was the unwanted object. Moving away from him and around the couch, she busied herself with picking up some of Cameron's stuffed animals. In the process of picking up his gray elephant that he couldn't leave home with out, she regarded Lucky with cool ease, "Lucky, Jax is the father of this child." Before he could interrupt, which she knew he was going to, she hurried on "We were never going to be apart of this child's life. I wasn't supposed to grow attached to her, Courtney and Jax weren't supposed to be in the middle of a divorce, and we were never supposed to plot ways to keep this child away from Jax. Getting married should be about our love, not a quick and painless way to keep this child away from her father! But guess what, things change and I have to do my best to come up with the most reasonable compromise for all of us, because obviously no one else is going to."

Anger was quickly boiling up in the feisty brunette, but Lucky was oblivious to it. It had been a long time since he was on the receiving end of her wrath, and it had been a long time since the Take No Shit Elizabeth came out to play, well half time was over and Elizabeth was suited up and ready to take control.

With the couch separating them Lucky turned to face her head on. "Do you think that I am trying to get you to marry me just to steal Jax's child. I never wanted this in the first place Elizabeth. You were the one who came up with this crazy idea to give Jax and Courtney," placing both hands on his chest and tilting to the side while batting his eye lashes "the most precious gift in the world." Straitening, he went on "Well guess what Elizabeth, Jax and Courtney are selfish people and could care less about you or this child. To Courtney, this was her escape to move on to the next man of the hour, and for Jax this is his way to be in control. I am the only one who has thought about you and only you throughout this whole ordeal."

It was really hard for her to hear the rest of his speech. Once he mocked her intentions she couldn't help but tune him out and stare at him with blind furry while the words asshole, fucking asshole ran over and over in her head. He must have been through with his stupid speech because he was staring at her like he expected her to bow down at his feet and claim him King.

Forget that.

She did the only thing that came to her heated mind, the only thing that made logical sense, she took the stuff animal that was held tightly in her grasp, raised it above her head,

And threw it straight at his hard head.

Sonny was a lost man. His world was turning upside down and there was nothing he could do about it. Maybe this was God's way of punishing him for being such a cold blooded bastard. Maybe this was finally the end to his untouchable existence, the breaking of Sonny Corinthos. Before Jason came into his life he was just starting in this career as the head honcho. He had Luke and Stone, and he thought he had the life. Then Stone died of aids, and he would have sworn at that time he was being punished. Sure Stone was the one whose life had ended, but Sonny was the one who had lost his brother. But all of that changed when he stumbled upon a confused man who just wanted to be left alone. Everyone was trying to make Jason remember being the loving soon to be doctor. Unfortunately for them, but fortunately for Sonny, Jason couldn't do that. He couldn't be who they wanted him to be and Sonny saw a lot of himself in Jason at that time. He saw a man with no where to go and had no idea as to where he came from, he saw a lost man and did something that was not very familiar to him.

He reached out and helped him. Sonny gave him a job and brought Jason into his world. There were times that he thought he was a bastard for taking advantage of Jason and exposing him to the mob life. Why did he think it was okay to drag another man into a world that there was no turning away from? He was never allowed to dwell on those thoughts because Jason always reassured him that he wanted this life. To him, Sonny was his savior, he took him from nothingness and gave him life, and Sonny was just that naïve and selfish to believe him.

But now, standing on the docks with the man he knew as his brother, the man who claimed he owed him his life. Sonny knew he had been wrong all those years ago. Jason could have had a better life than the one he offered him. He had been angry at life at the time and didn't know better so he just accepted this life; he learned to live with the danger and the threats and the unachievable dreams, and he settled. No, Sonny knew he was a bastard and deserved all the hell that was going on in his life right now.

This man staring at him with cold blue eyes was not the confused man he met ten years ago. He didn't wake up this time to find out that he was a loved golden boy. He woke up with no memory as to who he was, and found out that he was a cold blooded killer for the Port Charles Mafia. This man standing in front of him was not confused, but disgusted. He was not looking at Sonny for a way of escape; he was looking at him as if he were the devil himself and if you asked the right person, they would agree that Sonny was the devil reincarnated.

But with knowing all of this, knowing that he trapped a man for ten years to a life of nothing, Sonny could not help but be selfish. It was decided years ago that he only did things that benefited him, so why change the stereotype now. He needed Jason, not just to help him with this new situation he found himself in with the Ruiz family, but with making things right again. If there was ever a problem, he knew he could turn to Jason, and he didn't know what else to do.

So when Sam called frantic on the phone, babbling about how Jason was being irrational and wouldn't listen to her. How he seemed to be coming back to her, but then just got up and left, Sonny knew he needed to find his friend. Not just because he needed Jason, but because he was a walking target. He was a man with many enemies and had no clue as to who they were. His intentions were to find Jason and get him out of the open and into a safe place. But once he saw Jason his intentions where thrown out into the harbor. Yes he wanted Jason safe, but he also needed to take care of business. The saying old habits die hard really took on a new meaning with Sonny. Jason was his go to guy, and even though he knew he couldn't remember being a hit man, Sonny still had to try.

"I won't kill for you."

It was a simple statement, one that was said that left room for no arguments, but when did Sonny ever back down?

"I'm not asking you to. I'm asking you to realize what type of danger we are in here. You can't remember your life right now," shrugging his shoulders he looked out at the water briefly and then returned his gaze to the ice cold eyes that were staring back, "fine. But let's face it Jason, your life is in danger. People who mean the world to you are targets, and you can't just sit back and let this ride out. Your instincts are still there, you proved that when you took down those men in the clinic."

That image still made his gut twist. He didn't need to be reminded of how easy it was to take down those two men in mere minutes. He didn't need reminding of how he easily held two guns in his hands and shot both men dead without a second thought. Those reminders were what made him know that he couldn't do it again. Not intentionally anyhow.

"Why do you need me? I'm sure you have plenty of other men who would be more then willing to do this for you. Why do…"

"Because you are the only one I trust!"

It was at that moment that Jason felt the depth of his supposed relationship with this Sonny Corinthos. People were telling him that they were best friends, but he just couldn't seem to grasp that concept. How could two men who were in this business be that close? But looking at Sonny, seeing the desperation written in his eyes, Jason just knew. He knew that their friendship meant almost everything to Sonny. It seemed to be killing Sonny that he couldn't remember him, that he couldn't help him with this newest threat. He was really caught between a hard place and a rock. He couldn't kill for this man, he just knew that he would not be able to take another persons life, no matter how evil they were. But then again, he felt like he wanted to help this man standing in front of him. He wanted to reach out and help him. The only question was, how?

Shoulders sagging in defeat Jason looked at the other man with sorry eyes "I just don't think I can help you. I'm sorry." He was about to turn away when a man came waltzing down the steps with cool but angry steps and rounded on Sonny. He looked like he was going to attack him so Jason just reacted.

He grabbed the man by the back of his well pressed shirt, yanked him away from Sonny, and planted himself in between the intruder and Sonny. Stabbing a finger at the tall man he growled, "Back off."

If Sonny weren't so shocked he would have eased Jason's uneasiness, but he stood there for a moment looking at his tense back, wondering if Jason realized what he was doing. When he started to step towards the other man, Sonny decided it was then that he needed to take action.

"Jason, man, its ok, this is Jax, my sister's husband."

"Soon to be ex-husband."

It took a moment for him to realize that he was about to attack this Jax, but once he did, Jason backed off immediately. Disgust was written all over his face. "I'm…I'm sorry." Fuck this sucked.

"Yeah, sure," dismissing Jason with ease, Jasper Jax turned his attention to Sonny. "You know Sonny, I don't know what it is with all of you people, thinking that you can just take what you want with no worries about what it might do to other people. How your selfishness will affect others."

Stepping around Jason who still slightly separated the other two men, Sonny asked with edge in his voice, "What the hell are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about you and your damn sister. I don't know if you have heard the wonderful news, but not even five months into our marriage and your sister has already found her newest victim."

"Watch it Jax's"

"No! Damn it, I am so sick and tired of you and yours Corinthos. I truly loved Courtney. I saw something in her and I feel madly in love with her. I wanted a family with her, and when she told me she couldn't have kids I didn't turn away from her. I didn't turn my back on her and find the next best thing. No! Instead I did everything in my power to make her happy. She wanted the damn surrogacy just as much as I did and now she is using that as her excuse as to why she cheated on me. Elizabeth is now pregnant with my child and doesn't want to hand over my child because your sister couldn't keep her legs closed. I should have known never to get involved with her. I mean she went from being married to A.J., then minutes later marrying his brother. Only to realize that she couldn't handle the life so she tried her hand in being with that Brian cop guy, only to get yet another divorce and move right on to me."

Once this Australian idiot mentioned Elizabeth, Jason's ears involuntarily perked up. What was it about this nurse that seemed to always catch his interest? She was beautiful, quick witted, and she didn't bug him about things he should be remembering. They obviously had a past that was worth talking about because she told him if he asked she would explain. She didn't just say the simple statement of 'were friends' or anything like that, and she didn't tell him that there wasn't much to explain. They were something to each other, and for the first time he wanted to know what that something was. He never asked Sam or Sonny to explain their relationship, they just did. They let him know what he was to them. But Elizabeth seemed to understand him, it was like she knew he wanted to know, but was still trying to get his bearings and couldn't really handle the information. She trusted him enough to open up her soul and poor out everything that was bothering her, and he tried to do the same until they were interrupted by Sonny.

Now the other man was staring at Jax with blind furry. Jason didn't understand why though. The Aussie had made since when he inadvertently called this Courtney woman a slut.

The woman had, according to Jax, moved on from man to man like they were a new pair of shoes. What kind of man becomes involved with his brother's ex-wife when the ink isn't even dry on the divorce papers yet? It seemed like this Courtney girl had a lot of growing up to do. Jason just felt sorry for any man that was unfortunate enough to be involved with her.

Taking a threatening step towards the Candy boy, Sonny's voice was lethal and deadly, "Look Jax, whatever problems you are having with my sister does not concern me. Courtney is her own person and there is nothing that I can do to help you out."

"Do you not even care that there is an innocent child involved in this. That Elizabeth is now pregnant with a child that was supposed to be your niece or nephew? Or does it not really matter to you? You know, since this child was never really going to be your blood niece, just by name right Sonny? Elizabeth does not need this stress; she doesn't need to worry about whether or not she is going to have to fight for custody. Dr. Meadows already warned her that she needed to keep her blood pressure down. I saw her in the hospital today and she looked completely withdrawn and tired. My child's life is as stake and it is all your sisters fault." With that last statement Jax turned around on his expensive loafers and walked away.

If the world stopped spinning, Sonny was sure that Jax would find someway to make that his fault. The man blamed him for everything. But Sonny knew he was right, Elizabeth was innocent in all of this. She had agreed to the surrogacy out of the goodness of her heart and because of his sister she was now screwed. He felt bad for the young woman. She was finally starting her life over, leaving all the shit that happened to her in the past, well in the past. She was now, finally, out of the world that Sonny and Jason were trapped in. Even when she thought she was moving on when she married his brother Ric, she was stilled sucked back in. She was just trying to do what she did best and take care of the people she loved. She was trying to provide for her family while giving Courtney something that she couldn't have on her own. Sonny had always admired that about Elizabeth. She was one of the most selfless people that he had ever met. He truly did not know how wonderful of a person Elizabeth was until she saved Jason's life. They had grown close during that time and had what he thought was a brother/sister relationship, but just like everything else in his life, that went to hell.

Both he and Elizabeth seemed to have a rough patch for a while during her marriage to Ric. Fortunately for her, she was moving on with her life. For Sonny, it was just getting worse. But no matter how bad he felt for the woman he once considered a sister; he really couldn't do anything to help her. He couldn't turn back the clock and make his slut of a sister not sleep with Nicolas. Hopefully she would figure out what to do, she was smart enough to make this work, and if he knew anything about Elizabeth, it was that she was a very determined tiny woman.

He was so lost in his own thoughts that he didn't notice Jason staring at him with open curiosity until he locked eyes with the younger man.

"How do you know Elizabeth?"

Sonny was a bit shocked at the question, but he was going to answer it either way. That was until his phone rang.

"Sorry." Holding up one finger he flipped open his phone and looked at Jason with true regret behind his dark orbs. "Yeah…..Carly? What's wrong?...ok, ok calm down I'll be right there."

Looking at Jason with regret in his eyes Sonny asked, "Can we finish this later? I really need to go to Carly."

With a simple nod of his head Sonny was gone. Jason was left there to wonder what Sonny meant with his last words. He doubted he meant he wanted to finish the conversation about Elizabeth. Jason was sure that Sonny meant that he wanted to finish the conversation they started with. He still wanted Jason to be his enforcer.

But that was a subject that was better left for another time. He had more pressing issues that he needed to take care of. Like going back to the Penthouse and telling Sam the decision that he came to while he was on the docks.

"Did you….. did you just throw that at me?

"Yes"

"Why?"

"Because you were pissing me off and I didn't have anything harder in reach."

Lucky just looked at her like she was a three year old throwing a tantrum. Her arms were crossed under her chest; she wore just simple jeans and a blue tee shirt that brought out the color of her eyes, and her hair was flowing freely around her face. She had never looked more beautiful to him than she did in that moment. But that didn't mean that he wasn't pissed with her. This was their life, and she was just willing to let Jax into it. Not if he had anything to do with it.

Tossing the elephant on the couch, Lucky looked at her with annoyance behind his eyes "Elizabeth, stop acting childish. I'm just trying to get you to see that we don't need Jax in our lives. This child would have a much better life if we were her parents."

So throwing her son's stuffed animal at him wasn't the most mature thing in the world. But God help her the man was infuriating the hell out of her. Dropping her arms to her side and walking back around the couch to be closer to him, she reached out her hand and cupped his jaw, "Lucky, you will be a father to this child, just as you are to Cameron. But I can't keep Jax from his child. How is it his fault that Courtney and Nicolas had an affair? It's not; I can't fault him for leaving Courtney and wanting to raise this child."

Placing his hand over hers Lucky countered "If Jax agrees to this he is going to be using you. He is going to take your trust in him and then find a way to use that against you and take this child. You are to trusting, Jax will use that to manipulate you. He's like that, look what he did with Courtney. The only reason he married her was to get back at Sonny for stealing Brenda."

Dropping her hand from his cheek as if it burned she backed up a few spaces. "I am not that naive Lucky and the world does not revolve around Sonny Corinthos. Jax loved Courtney; she's the one who ruined their marriage by cheating on him." The saying if looks could kill was taking up a new meaning with the way the she was staring at him. If they could kill he would be ripped to shreds with no evidence of his puny existence.

"You used to think otherwise. When you thought I was dead, you turned to Jason and Sonny, and from what Nicolas told me, those two could do no wrong in your eyes. It was only a couple of years ago that you were going to be with Jason. You thought that Jason was the most wonderful and caring person in the world and where did that get you? Married to a man that only married you so that he could stick it to his brother, who is none other than the Sonny Corinthos. For god sake, you trusted a man who kidnapped another woman and put you in the hospital. You put your faith in the wrong people and it always comes back to bite you in the ass. You can be very naïve and I'm just trying to…"

His last words were cut off by what might have been the most beautiful sound to Elizabeth's ears at that moment. The sound of flesh meeting flesh as she slapped him good and hard across his face.

With a deadly voice she stared at him hard and said "Get out."

He was rubbing his sore cheek that was already turning red when he responded "I'm not going anywhere. We need to talk about this."

Moving away from him when he tried to come close to her she turned around and started to walk towards Cameron's room. "I swear to god Lucky if you are not out of here in five seconds I will pack up Cameron's things and we will leave."

He knew that she was not messing around, and he really couldn't let her leave with her, their, son at night. "Fine I'm…I'm going, but I'll be back tomorrow. I'll let you cool off a bit; we both need to cool off a bit." His heart was aching for her, he wanted to reach out and touch her but he knew it was a bad idea. When she saw him moving towards her she adverted her gaze and stepped even further away "Just know that I'm sorry Elizabeth. I was angry and I didn't mean to sound so cruel."

He was walking to the door and stopped dead in his tracks when he heard her hoarse voice say "I don't think you should come back Lucky. Maybe this is not meant to be." And with that she walked into the kitchen to clean up the forgotten tea she had made over an hour ago.

There were tears in his eyes and a hole in his heart when Lucky opened the door and walked out on the only life he knew.

Jason was not looking forward to this. He wanted to avoid it like people wanted to avoid the plaque. But if he wanted to breathe easily, if he wanted the feeling of wanting to crawl out of his own skin to go away, then he could not avoid this conversation. He had been on the docks just starring out at the water for a long time before Elizabeth showed up. In that time period he had a lot of thoughts running through his head. Most of them were occupied with wondering what the hell he was supposed to do with his life. He didn't want to work for Sonny anymore. Or at least not in the way he used to. He also had to figure out what to do with Sam.

And that was the reason that he was going back to the Penthouse. She was the reason that he was leaving the elevator at Harborview Towers, turning left towards his Penthouse, and taking a deep breath.

The second he opened the door she was right there asking so many questions that his head started to spin. "Whoa, wait a minute." Placing his hands on her shoulders to move her away from him he walked towards the balcony doors. He was starting to feel trapped already and looking out at the harbor below gave him the illusion that he was outside. It would be easier to have this conversation if he didn't have to look at her.

"What's wrong Jason? You left hours ago, and now you seem all tense." She was worried about him. When she called Sonny, he not so subtlety told her that Jason should not be out in the open because it was dangerous, he promised that he would look for him and call her. Well, that was hours ago and Sonny never called. She stayed at home pacing around waiting for Jason to either come home, or for Sonny to call.

Now that he was home she didn't know if that was a good thing. Sam thought that if anyone could get through to Jason, it would be either her or Sonny. She would rather it be her, but right now she could not be choosy.

He was staring off into the harbor when he interrupted her thoughts. "I need to take control of my life."

"That's good, let me help you, we could…."

When he turned to stare at her, she new that she should let him finish, apparently this new Jason did not like being interrupted.

He turned his attention back to the harbor and continued, "I can't depend on other people to take care of me. I may never remember a thing about my old life, my life with you, and I can't continue to live like this. I can't..." with a heavy sigh he turned to look at her "I can't explain it, but I need to be on my own. So I am going to move out."

"What? No Jason you can't!"

She was moving towards him and he knew that he just had to move away. He didn't know a lot of things right now, but he knew that he did not want her to touch him. She stopped dead in her tracks when he started to back away. She was loosing him and she knew it, but right now there was nothing she could do about it. She heard about what happened when he lost his memory ten years ago. Everyone was always trying to make him be like the way he was and that just made him retreat further away until they lost him for good. Sonny told her she needed to back down, not be so aggressive, so she knew what she had to do.

"Fine you… you can move out." Tears were easily streaming down her face. She used her hands to wipe them away and gestured to him "Just please don't shut me out completely. That's all I ask."

He didn't reassure her, because he really didn't know if he could. He just glanced at her and then turned to walk upstairs. "I'm just going to go pack," and with that he disappeared upstairs.

She couldn't stay there and watch him leave. She had to get out of there before he came back downstairs. If she had to watch him leave she would break down right in front of him and her whole plan would be ruined. She couldn't do that so she decided to leave first. As she walked out the door she looked back at their home and made a vow that Jason Morgan would not leave her life, she would make sure of it.

Lucky Spencer looked like someone just told him his life was over. He looked pitiful sitting at the counter of the River Rat drinking his fourth beer in one hour. He was so lost in his self pity that he didn't even blink when someone sat down right next to him. He didn't even acknowledge this persons presence until she spoke.

"Fancy meeting you here."

When he looked to his right, he was met with the eyes of someone who looked just as run down as he did.

Sam McCall.