For Appearance's Sake

By Teala373

Chapter 5

In our last chapter: After an excruciating emotional moment with Bruce, Barbara is taken to his bedroom where she showers in an attempt to relax. As she thinks about the intense kiss they shared, she turns to see an angry Dick Grayson standing before her.

(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)

Bruce stopped halfway up the stairs with the tray of food in his hands and smiled. He had just caught himself humming an old Billie Holiday tune as he headed back to his bedroom. There were days when he felt shackled to his fate, but now, he felt free.

Continuing up the stairs, he was almost to his bedroom door when he sensed that something wasn't right. Quickening his pace, he set the tray on a dresser and headed for the bathroom. Barbara lay unconscious on the floor, wearing what appeared to be one of his dress shirts.

Kneeling beside her, he checked her pulse, breathing, and her eyes. He raised her knees up to increase her blood flow and then dampened a washcloth for her forehead.

"Barbara?" he called in a firm, but gentle tone as he cradled her in his arms.

She stirred slightly, a small groan escaping her pale lips.

"Barbara?" He adjusted the cloth on her forehead and tapped her cheeks to rouse her.

She blinked repeatedly before her eyes opened fully. She looked at him with an expression he couldn't quite gage.

"Are you alright?"

She simply stared at him for a few moments before finding her voice. "Wh-what happened?"

"You fainted. How's your head?"

"I feel… strange…"

He ran his head over the back of her head. "Does this hurt?"

"No…"

He carried her back to his bed and settled her underneath the sheets. He propped up two pillows behind her head and removed the washcloth.

"Do you remember what happened?" He applied the cool washcloth to the back of her neck and wrists, trying to sooth her pressure points.

"I… I was combing my hair… then I turned and… everything got hazy…" she paused, breaking eye contact. She didn't want to tell him that she thought she saw Dick.

He knew something was wrong, but he didn't want to press her. "Relax. Maybe eating something will help."

He wondered how long she had gone since her last meal. He knew she always kept nutrition supplements in her utility belt for times when missions ran long; maybe she had overextended herself between the research and everything that had just happened.

She feigned displeasure as she was presented with a steaming bowl of pasta. "Hey, I was looking forward to grilled cheese."

"Sorry to disappoint you,"

She took a bite and smiled. "Trust me, I'm not disappointed. This is great!"

He sat beside her and they ate in relative silence, making occasional small talk until they were finished.

Bruce cleared away the dishes on the tray and set them back on his dresser. "Alfred would kill me if he ever knew I didn't bring those straight down to the kitchen sink."

She laughed and looked at him expectantly, wondering what was to happen next.

"Stay here and rest. I'm going to work downstairs," he stated, meaning the cave.

"Thanks again for dinner… and taking care of me."

He stepped over to the side of the bed and brushed her damp bangs from her forehead. "Anytime," he looked deeply into her eyes for several moments before letting his gaze wander down. "You look good in that shirt. Better than I do."

She blushed and it made his heart swell to see her look so lovely. He leaned down and placed a delicate kiss on her lips before leaving the room.

Settling down into the plush pillows, Barbara closed her eyes and fell into a deep slumber.

(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)

Bruce ran a few searches and queries against what Barbara had presented him before suiting up and starting rounds.

He was able to keep his mind clear as he swung across the rooftops of Gotham. The city was quiet of major villains, many of them locked away in Arkham Asylum, but that didn't free Gotham of crime.

He managed to stop three robberies, five muggings, two attempted rapes, a drunk driver, a domestic disturbance, two muggings, a car jacking, and a jumper from an apartment building. By the time he returned and recorded his work in the computer, it was nearing six o'clock in the morning.

Stepping into the shower installed in the back of the cave, his mind finally wandered to the events of the previous evening. He had always been the kind of man that knew what he wanted and pursued it. He wondered if he was moving too fast for Barbara. He was concerned over her emotional state and how she had fainted. He resolved to take it slower and not pressure her with anything. However, the thought her of sleeping in his bed, wearing nothing but one of his dress shirts, was incredibly tempting.

Just as he rinsed off the last of soap and shampoo away, a random memory entered his mind. He saw the party Veronica Vreeland had thrown a year and half ago at the revamped Gotham Plaza ballroom. In the center of the dance floor were Dick and Barbara, laughing as they spun each other around. Dick then dipped Barbara low and when he brought her back up, it was impossible to miss the love and passion between them. Pulling her close, he kissed her before twirling her around the dance floor again.

Shutting off the water, Bruce shook his head slightly, trying to erase the memory from his mind. Unfortunately, thoughts of Dick and Barbara, happy together, continued to flood him as he dried off and dressed.

Climbing up the stairs, he wondered why everything was always so complicated.

When he reached his room, he watched Barbara sleep, briefly running his hands through her hair. As much as longed to climb into bed beside her, he opted for a comfortable chair in the corner of the room.

(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)O(o)

Barbara awoke feeling refreshed, though her heart was still conflicted as thoughts of both Bruce and Dick confused her.

Rubbing the sleep from he eyes, she clumsily stood from the large bed and stretched. Entering the bathroom, she saw that Bruce had laid out a new toothbrush for her, as well as fresh clothes for her. She smiled, realizing he had stopped by her apartment on his patrol. She took her time dressing. Her muscles felt sluggish and she was in no particular hurry.

In the kitchen, she found a fresh pot of coffee and breakfast waiting for her. She ate slowly, thinking about what she would say to Bruce when she saw him. She couldn't deny the raw, sexual passion that sizzled between them, but she still couldn't stop thinking about Dick.

Dick had been her first love, though he hadn't been her first crush, or her first boyfriend. He was so achingly perfect to her that she was almost positive that he was the one. When he left, it had destroyed her, but she persevered and continued fighting alongside Batman. She kept thinking Dick would come back, back to their team… back to her…

But, he never did.

Though Bruce never told her, she knew he was operating as Nightwing in Bludhaven. He had a new life, a new job, and new friends. He had moved on and never looked back. So, why couldn't she?

Sighing, she brought her plates to the sink and began rinsing them out. Somewhere, deep inside, she still loved him, but she had to face the cold, hard truth: he was never coming back.

As she headed down to the cave, she managed to convince herself to move forward and to leave Dick Grayson buried deep within her memory.

"How are you feeling?" Bruce asked from his chair at the computer console as he heard her walk up behind him.

"Much better. Thank you for breakfast."

He turned and smiled at her. "I came up with a few more interesting pieces of information on Jason Bard, but I have to make an appearance at the office."

"You? Work on a Saturday?" She made an incredulous face. "Won't your minions drop over in shock that you're not christening a new golf course, or something?"

Standing, he stood close to her, backing her into the console, with a devilish gleam in his eye. "I'm sure they will be surprised that I'm not spending the day with the beautiful redhead I'm dating, but I do need to catch up on a few things."

Blushing, Barbara ducked her head. "I can finish working on the research while you're gone."

He gently tilted her face to his and captured her lips with his own. "I'll be back as soon as I can," he promised, "and then we can talk more."

Barbara swallowed a lump in her throat and nodded in affirmation.

Leaning down, he touched his forehead to hers affectionately. "It doesn't have to be difficult, Barbara," he whispered, "we'll take it slow," he pulled back and smiled at her slyly. "I can't have you falling over every time I kiss you like that."

She laughed, albeit nervously, and blushed a deeper red. "It's… I don't know… so different to see you… like this…"

"It's different for me, too," he admitted, "but I see now…"

He didn't have to say anymore, she knew what he meant. She reached up and kissed him, pouring forth everything she could to make him realize that she understood.