Dueling Affections Chapter 3: The Catfight, a yu-gi-oh fanfic

"Hey, Laura!" said Kazuki the next morning.

"Oh… hi, Kazuki," said a crestfallen Laura.

"What's up with you?" Kazuki asked.

"It's that Delilah Rhodes!" she exclaimed with a tone she might have used if she were cleaning, and if she were dealing with a particularly tough stain. "She keeps driving me nuts about all this Kazuki-poo stuff! Honestly, if I have to hear that name one more time, I might just crack!"

"How do you do, Kazuki-poo?" Delilah said as she came bursting in right on cue.

"That's it!" Laura shouted. "Who do you think you are, anyway?"

"Easy, Laura!" said Delilah. "No need to get snippy!"

"Who're you calling 'snippy'?" Laura said. "I am not snippy! I am absolutely furious! Who do you think you are, thinking you can come in here and steal my boyfriend?!"

"'Boyfriend,' huh?" Delilah said mockingly. "Ooh! I seem to have touched a nerve. I guess I should just back off, huh?"

"'Touched a nerve'?!" Laura screamed.

"Cat fight!" said a boy nearby.

"I smell a duel coming on!" said another.

"Oho!" scoffed Delilah. "If that's the way you feel, then why don't we have a little duel? You and me, Thursday Afternoon Duel, Kaibadome! Winner gets Kazuki all to herself!"

"WHAT?!!" shouted Kazuki. "How dare you treat me like a trophy?"

"Game on!" yelled Laura, as Kazuki fainted. Koji entered the scene in a run and started slapping Kazuki in the face. Kazuki came to after a few slaps.

"Come on, Kaz!" shouted Koji. "Wake up, man!"

"What's up—with them?" Kazuki said a little groggily. "What's going on?"

"Oh, not much—just Delilah and Laura fighting over whose boyfriend you'll be, and Delilah challenged Laura to a Thursday Afternoon Duel at the Kaibadome, and the winner gets you all to herself."

"WHAT?!!" Kazuki yelled again. "How can they do this to me?"

"Actually, it's pretty natural female instinct," said Koji. "When two girls like the same guy, they usually tend to compete against one another for his affections. And we boys aren't any better, either. We'll fight for girls in the same way."

"How do you know about this?" Kazuki was curious to find out.

"Oh, just something my Uncle Tristan told me," said Koji. "Anyway, Kaz, there's someone here you just have to meet."

So they went to the cafeteria for their breakfast, and Koji called out, "Hey! Hsu!"

The boy called Hsu rushed over to join the others.

"Kazuki, this is Hsu Taylor, my little brother," said Koji. "He just transferred here a week ago. Hsu, this is Kazuki Muto, the Prince of Games."

Hsu gasped upon seeing Kazuki.

"Then it's true!" he exclaimed. "All the rumors I've heard upon entering Domino City! They've been saying Kazuki Muto has arrived in the high school here, and here he is!"

He grasped Kazuki's hand firmly and shook it. "I'm a big fan of your old man Yugi, Kaz, a big fan."

Kazuki blinked. "My father?" he asked. "My father's retired."

"Yeah, but I watch him all the time on the classic sports channel," said the other. "Is it true he is the only duelist to ever defeat Seto Kaiba?"

"Nah, I heard Maximillion Pegasus defeated him once," said Kazuki.

"Really? I thought that was only because Kaiba surrendered!" Hsu replied.

"Yeah, that's a pretty controversial duel," Kazuki said. "Some say he surrendered, others say he lost his life points in battle. I can tell you this, though: After the duel was over, he lost his soul to the Millennium Eye, and Dad had to go and defeat Pegasus to get him back, as well as Kaiba's brother Mokuba, and Dad's grandfather Solomon."

"Yeah… I'm sorry to hear about what happened to Solomon," Hsu said. "Anyway, they say that Pegasus is dying, too."

"That'll be a good thing, when he dies," said Kazuki. "Not that I have anything against Pegasus; far from it! Dad told me a tale about how Pegasus fell deeply in love with a girl called Cecilia, and they were about to be married when she suddenly died at the altar."

"Yeah, Uncle Tristan told Hsu and me about that, too," Koji chipped in. "He was so devastated that he discovered the Millennium Eye and tried to gather all seven Items to try and bring her back to life."

"But then he lost the Eye to some kid called Bakura," said Kazuki, "and that's when he lost consciousness for a while… and when he woke up, he found himself in a mental institution."

"That's a terrible fate to befall anybody, the nuthouse," said Hsu.

"Yeah," Kazuki agreed.

"Gentlemen, I hate to break up this mutual admiration society1," said Koji, "but breakfast period is about to end in five… four… three… two… one."

And with that, the bell rang to signal the end of the breakfast period, and everybody rushed to their first-period classes.

"A duel?" exclaimed Téa. "Between Laura Devlin and Delilah Rhodes?"

"Over you?!" she and Yugi said in unison.

"That's right," said Kazuki. "According to the stakes, the winner gets me all to herself."

"That's no good!" Téa shouted. "You can't duel for a prize such as love!"

"Such a preposterous duel is a complete and total insult to the Heart of the Cards!" Yugi added.

"We should talk to their parents," said Téa. "We cannot allow a duel like this to go on, for the love of our son!"

"I quite agree," said Yugi. "I will talk to the Devlin family."

"And I the Rhodes family," added Téa.

"We'll see if we can straighten this mess out and cancel the duel," said Yugi.

That night, Yugi arrived at Laura Devlin's house. He knocked at the door, which opened to reveal Laura's father.

"Yes? Who is this? What do you want?" he inquired.

"Mr. Devlin, I presume?" Yugi said.

"The name is Sam," said the other. "Samuel Devlin. What business do you have here?"

"I don't know if you are familiar with me," said Yugi, "but my name is Yugi Muto, and I am the three-time Duel Monsters World Champion—"

"I know who you are," said Sam. "And I'm telling you, I don't want or need anything to do with anyone involved in the world of Duel Monsters."

"I know about your daughter and my son!" Yugi shouted as Sam closed the door. But then the door re-opened, and Sam merely said, "Oh. Why don't you come in, then?"

"Thank you kindly, Sam," said Yugi, and he entered the house. Sam closed the door. Yugi took a seat in the guest chair. Sam and his wife Helen took seats on the couch.

"Now, Mr. Muto, what brings you to this house?" Sam inquired.

"Yes. My business in this house. Right," said Yugi. "Well, I have reason to believe that your daughter was involved in an altercation with one of her classmates at Domino City High School."

"An altercation?" repeated Sam.

"Dear me, I hope no one was hurt!" said Helen.

"There was no physical action, I am sure," said Yugi, "but the two of them appear to be fighting over my son Kazuki. From what he has told me, a girl named Delilah Rhodes has challenged your daughter Laura to a game of Duel Monsters in which the winner would apparently keep Kazuki all to herself."

"And what is that to do with us?" asked Helen.

"I know you are not, and do not wish to be, familiar with Duel Monsters, Sam, but I feel I must tell you this," said Yugi. "A duel between two members of the same sex for the affection of a member of the opposite sex is a complete and total insult to the Heart of the Cards—"

"You are quite right in that I do not wish to have anything to do with Duel Monsters," said Sam. "I was under the impression that I told you this previously."

"And you are quite right in saying you did," said Yugi.

"Then what does an altercation between my daughter and a classmate have to do with a belief such as yours?" Sam asked.

Yugi sighed. There apparently was no getting around a man like him. Finally he said, "You're quite right."

"I know I'm right!" Sam exclaimed.

"Then you should at least talk to your daughter and tell her that a boy's affections are a pointless thing over which to fight, or to play a competitive game," said Yugi.

"Why should I?" Sam asked. "Girls will fight over boys, and the same is true the other way around. It is nature, and such a thing cannot be fought." He and Yugi stood up. "So if you're looking to us to stop a game over your son, then I'm sorry, but it simply cannot be done by us." They walked over to the door, which Sam opened to usher Yugi outside. "I am sorry this is how you feel about your son, but there is nothing either I or Helen can do about it, and I am also sorry to say that you and I have no more business together tonight. Good night, Mr. Muto," he said.

"But Sam—" Yugi began, but it was too late: Sam had already closed the door in his face. Defeated, Yugi turned around and walked away, trespassing upon the privacy of the Devlin family no more.

"How did it go with the Devlin family?" asked Téa when Yugi returned home that night.

"No dice," said Yugi. "What of the Rhodes family?"

"Same here," Téa said sadly. "The duel will go on as scheduled for Thursday afternoon."

"I was afraid of that," said Yugi. "Good night, Téa."

"Good night, Yugi," she said as he stalked to his bedroom.