I wonder what my partner knows sometimes, even though I shouldn't.

She knows a lot more than she lets on, because that's kind of what the job is.
We know, but we don't know. We see, but we don't see. We feel, but we don't feel.

I know the last one is what my problem is, but sometimes…

There was something about this case that bothered her, but once again, I missed it.

Used to be a point in time where I could read her and she could read me.

Not anymore.

So she talks to Casey, and I talk to no one, and I'm an idiot for it,

But I can't blame her for talking to Casey, because they are

The only two women in the unit, at present, but I can't help but feel

Somewhat jealous, because Liv used to talk to me, but she doesn't anymore.

Well, she does, but not about personal stuff, like she used to.

Guess it's because she's figured out that I have my own issues.

That doesn't necessarily mean I can't help figure out hers.

So when she comes and sits at her desk later, after the case is done,

I look at her.

And she looks back at me, and I can tell

Something's not right, because Olivia Benson never gets that look on her face,

But she has it now.

And it almost scares me, so I get up and get my coat.

She looks at me for a moment, and I motion for her to come along.

So she does. And we go to that place we always go,

The place we haven't been to in a while.

And she talks to me, and tells me what she told Casey,

Because it had to do with this case,

And because she doesn't know how to handle it, and I'm tempted to laugh

Not at her, but at myself, because I've been caught up in my own problems so long

That I don't seem to remember other people have issues.

I apologize to her, and she gives me a startled look and calls me an idiot

Because I haven't done anything wrong, according to her,

But according to myself, I have, and so I say this and she shakes her head.

Just one of those things, she tells me.

And I want to believe her, because it seems that way, and then…

I start to wonder what would happen if one of my girls was caught in this situation.

So I tell her, and she shrugs, because like me, she doesn't know, either.