Title: Love Potion

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Ch. 2: Excuse me?

Summary: Normally Vala would love this kind of attention, but not this kind of attention! More people fall victim to the same affliction as Mitchell and Teal'c. Daniel and Vala discover the cause.

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The next day unsettled Vala. Nearly every man she spoke with had asked her out or worse. Mitchell and Teal'c continued their antics as well. Sam was nowhere to be found; she'd been sent to Area 51 for the week. Vala was finally called into General Landry's office that afternoon. Expecting to be scolded for the disruption to the base, she entered it cautiously. With a meek smile, she made her presence known. "General Landry?" All she saw was the back of his chair.

He spun around, revealing the guitar ready in his hands and the straw hat atop his head. The sight was incredibly funny, and Vala began to giggle. She stopped when he strummed on the guitar.

Later on, she ran into Daniel's office and locked the door behind her. Breathing heavily and leaning against it, she answered his inquiring look. "General Landry just sang me a sonnet to express his undying love to me."

Daniel burst out laughing uncontrollably. He laughed until tears were streaming down his face and his stomach hurt. And even then, he still giggled a little at her joke. But it wasn't a joke. He could tell by her posture that she was dead serious. That sobered him a little. "Oh. You're telling the truth."

By that point, Vala had sunk down to the floor and was leaning her head on her knees. She lifted her head to look at him. "Of course it's the truth!" She was visibly shaken by the rather humorous ordeal.

"Obviously, something weird is happening here."

"Daniel, I thought we established that yesterday."

He scrunched his face. "Right. Well, has anyone else been acting strange besides Mitchell, Teal'c, and the General?"

"I think the more appropriate question would be: How many people, or rather men, have approached me with incredible proposals of love and lust?" Vala stood and crossed her arms. She leaned back on the table.

"Okaaay. Then how many?" Daniel shoved his hands in his pockets as he stood near her.

"Well, let's see…" She held up her hands and began counting on her fingers. "There's Mitchell, Teal'c, Landry… the three marines in the commissary… the two SFs in the Gate room… Walter…"

"Wait a minute. Walter?"

"Yes, darling. Now shhhh, I'm trying to count." She continued using her fingers. "Hmmm… There was Dr. Lee, then his assistant, oh and that assistant's assistant… I'm forgetting one." Daniel gaped at the number of people she had just listed so nonchalantly. "Ahh! Siler. Yes, he's the other one. So that makes thirteen."

"Thirteen." He couldn't believe it.

"Thirteen," she repeated.

"THIRTEEN?!"

She wilted a little at his shout. "Yes, darling. See? I told you something crazy is happening!"

Daniel pulled his hands out of his pockets and slapped his forehead. He ran them through his messy hair in disbelief. "When did all of this start happening?"

"Just yesterday, when you first caught Mitchell. Right after we got back from… oh no."

"Uh oh."

"You don't think…"

"That crazy old woman!"

"I knew she was wonko!"

Daniel grabbed her hand. "Come on, we need to go back there and find out what she did to you." They ran through the halls toward the Control room. Daniel ran in first, "General, we need to go back to P4X-219!"

Landry didn't quite hear him. He was busy paying attention to a scuffle between two SFs down in the Gate room. They were throwing some serious punches. No one had moved to stop them. In fact, Landry was egging them on through the microphone. Vala started, "What in the Ancients' name…"

As if her voice could penetrate the thick glass of the Control Room, the two offenders below looked up. They spotted her within an instant. Both of them turned and began addressing her, sending swooning love songs her way. Landry and Walter noticed her presence, too. They grinned eagerly at her. She began to back away. "Vala," Walter said as he stood up and moved toward her with Landry, "I'm so glad to see you. I'd love to take you out some time."

"Not a chance, son, she'll be with me."

"Sir, with all due respect…" Walter continued. They went on like that as Vala sent a pleading look toward Daniel. He held back his laughter and sat down in Walter's chair to dial P4X-219. The two of them escaped the base unnoticed.

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TBC… Next time: A shorter chapter. Daniel and Vala find the old woman who started this deliciously funny mess and get some answers.