Chapter 7

Nightmares and Dreams

I picked up the glass and took a sip of the cool water. Laughter resonated off the walls as father made yet another joke, causing the visiting delegates and Kings to laugh. I couldn't help but smile as well. Father had a flare for humor, although when the situation called for it he could be so serious that it was scary. At the moment the mood was light though, something which I was grateful for.

"Very well, my lord, I will make sure that they know of your interest. I'm sure they will be pleased to know that you desire the new trade route," the Ambassador from Pluto commented. "Although I must warn you that fast trade is not something they are particularly good at."

"Very well, we will be anticipating his visit. We will send a letter in the next few days with an ambassador. It only makes sense it will not be fast trade since we are so far away from them. Besides, this is not something done out of need, but rather to establish a new alliance, so if the trade is slow that is fine as long as they do not mind," my father replied. They were talking about a planet of which I couldn't even remember the name.

There was the sound of shuffling papers and low murmurs. The meeting had been going on for well over three hours and I knew that things would be ending soon.

"Well gentlemen, shall we call it a day?" I heard my father ask, as if on cue.

"I think we covered more than we wanted today so I don't see why not," the King of Mars agreed.

"Yes, I think it's time we took a break," the King of Venus added in.

"Good. We can continue tomorrow then," father concluded. I sighed and leaned back in my chair, straitening out the papers in front of me.

"Endymion, I believe that congratulations are called for," I heard the King of Mars say. I glanced over to him.

"What for, my Lord?" I asked.

"For your marriage. We have not seen you in some time and it came as a surprise to us that you were married without inviting anyone to the wedding."

I could feel myself blush slightly. "It was a very small ceremony, my Lord, put together at the last minute. I thank you for your well wished though."

The King of Venus chuckled. "Young love is so impatient. I still remember what it was like. I offer my congratulations as well."

The Plutonian Ambassador nodded in agreement. "I too offer congratulations, as do my Lord and Lady. I have a letter from them to give to you a little later."

"Thank you," I replied, smiling. Serenity had been on the Earth for nearly three weeks now but to me it seemed as though she had always been there. She had fallen right into place, with the guidance provided by mother, Naru, and Anne. There had been very few 'incidents' where Serenity had a need to feel scared. Usually they occurred when there were crowds or when someone who had been abroad for a while came back and was not aware of Serenity's situation. Of course, she always felt anxious whenever Allan was around her, which seemed to be happening more and more frequently.

"Will be allowed to see your lovely wife during our visit?" The King of Mars asked.

I nodded. "Tomorrow night at the formal dinner, or if you happen to run into her during the day somewhere."

I was happy Father had arranged this meeting, since it meant that two of Usagi's former senshi had come to visit. She had been incredibly excited about that and when the girls had actually arrived, I lost Serenity's attention completely. I didn't mind though, she was happy.

The meeting ended and everyone went their separate ways. It was late and I was looking forward to getting into bed. The hallways were quite as I made my way to my room, pausing only briefly outside of Usagi's room. I could hear giggles coming from within, so I knew that she was still up with Rei and Mina. Of course, this didn't surprise me. I shook my head and smiled as I walked to my own room, closing the door soundlessly behind me.

My room was dark save for the remnants of a fire in the hearth. One of the maids must have lit it earlier and forgotten to come back to stoke it. I sighed as I threw another log onto the dying embers and then walked over to the balcony. Leaning against the railing I looked up into the star studded sky and let out a deep sigh.

"So you really like it hear?" I perked up at the sound of a feminine voice coming from the adjacent balcony. I glanced over and noticed that the door to Usagi's balcony was open, and I could hear the conversation from within. From having spoken to Mina and Rei earlier, I guessed that the speaker had been Rei. I didn't want to eavesdrop, but the question made me pause. I wanted to hear Serenity's answer when she was no speaking with me.

"I like it here a lot," I heard her reply. "I miss you so much though, as well as the Moon. Things are so different here. I feel a bit homesick sometimes."

"How are things going with Mr. Tall-Dark-and-Handsome?" I heard Mina asked. I had to choke down laughter so that they wouldn't discover me.

"You need to tell us all the juicy details!" Rei prodded. I smiled. If Usagi had any 'juicy details' then I wanted to hear them.

"I don't know what you two are talking about," I heard her reply, feigning innocence. There was a round of giggles.

"Oh come on, there must be something for you to tell!" Mina exclaimed. A moment of silence followed which had me straining my ears to make sure I wasn't missing anything.

Finally, Serenity spoke. "There really aren't any juicy details," she said sullenly.

"Is it still as bad as when you left the Moon?" Rei asked gently. I heard nothing but I could only assume that Serenity was nodding. "How have you been handling it though, on a planet with so many more men? And what about Endymion? How is he handling the situation?"

"It hasn't been so bad here. I think that the King and Queen and Endy made sure that there were as few men around me as possible, and those that are here at court must have been ordered not to touch me."She sighed. "I feel like a burden here."

"I'm sure they don't see you as a burden," Mina said gently.

"I still feel like one though. Everyone always acts so careful around me. I do appreciate it, but when every one makes sure they avoid you by a couple of feet, you feel a little...alone." I could hear the pain in her voice and it tore me on the inside. There was no reason she should feel that way!

"Endy has been very good to me though," Usagi continued. "He has not tried to come into my personal space unless necessary. He's been very sweet to me. We've been playing chess together, placing small...wagers every so often. I enjoy his company."

"What kind of wagers?" Rei asked teasingly and I couldn't help but chuckle softly. Since the first wager that I placed, Serenity and I had played six more times. The first two times she had won but all she had asked of me was to spend time with her. The first time on a horseback ride through the forests surrounding the palace. The second time I had to take her through the entire palace, exploring every nook and cranny. That had been rather interesting, since there were rooms I had not been in in years, and when we got to some of the storage rooms we found many interesting old paintings, clothing, furniture, and other treasures.

After that I had won once, and I made the same request of her as before. That time I had managed to keep her --occupied--longer, but not much. After that I let her win the next three evenings. I was not going to let her win the next time though.

"It's nothing big really. The winner just gets to make a request of the other, nothing too big," Serenity replied.

"Like what though?" I hear Mina ask, her curiosity obviously caught.

"Well when I won I asked him to go on a horse back ride with me or to go exploring the castle or reading to me...thing like that." I smiled as I remembered that third request. I had to read a book to her, and it took me nearly the entire week but I got through it. Why she asked me to read to her was beyond me, but we did it.

"And what about him? What has he asked of you?" Rei inquired a little impatiently.

"He-he asked me to put my hand on his face," Serenity whispered, the words almost not reaching my ears.

"He what?" Rei exclaimed. "What did you tell him?"

"I-I told him to close his eyes. Then I did it."

"You did?" Mina sounded rather shocked. I knew I had a silly grin on my face, but no one could see me so I didn't bother trying to suppress it. "That's wonderful!" Mina added.

"That's one step!" Rei exclaimed. I could picture Serenity sitting there, blushing and smiling. There was a short pause before Mina spoke again.

"Do you love him?" she asked. I felt my heart skip a beat, why, I don't know. Her words were hushed and inquisitive, beseeching Serenity for an honest answer. My grin dropped and I listened intently, the palms of my hands suddenly sweaty and my heart dancing wildy in my chest.

There was silence.

More silence.

Agonizing silence.

Torturing silence.

Then I heard the rustling of fabric, but no words. No yes or no, no maybe, no nothing. After a few moments of more silence, when I thought that I was ready to run into Serenity's room and demand the answer to the question, Mina finally spoke.

"We should go to bed, it's late and tomorrow is another day." I nearly cried out in frustration. I could picture Serenity either shaking or nodding her head, not speaking words so I could know what she was thinking...curses!

"Goodnight then. Sleep well!" Serenity replied. The sound of rustling fabric could be heard again and then I heard the door open and close. Then there was silence.

Feeling rather frustrated, I walked back into my room. Of course I wanted to know Serenity's answer, she was my wife after all, a woman that I respected and who respected me in return. We shared a link and I wanted to know if my affections were retu--if she cared for me. No other reason.

With a growl I sat down on the bed and took off my boots and tunic. I didn't bother taking off my loose white shirt and pants as I flopped down onto the mattress, the heat of the fire warming the room a little too much. Soon, I fell asleep.

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I was on the battle field. The black and white squares stretched all around me in a seemingly endless checkered pattern. Down on one knee I stared at the ground, not really sure what to do. A gentle breeze danced around me, causing my cloak and hair to dance with it. Where had my army disappeared to? Had I just been through another defeat? I did not know.

Alabaster Queen stood before me, Serenity, her white aura radiating around her. She had a small smile on her lips as she leaned down ever so slightly and touched her fingers below my chin, tilting my face upward. I felt a comforting heat spreading through my body, coursing through my veins and warming me even to my bones.

I felt something tug at my heart, gently at first then more urgently. Serenity's smile dropped and she froze. I stared at her curiously, and the tugging got stronger. She dropped her hand from my face and gave out a heart-wrenching scream. I was up on my feet in an instant, trying to see why she was suddenly so afraid.

The tugging got stronger, making my heart palpitate in my chest at a dangerous speed and ferocity.

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I woke up gasping for air. Even though I knew I was in my room, the sensation on my heart persisted. Then I heard it; a soft, muffled scream. Serenity was scared!

I leapt of my bed, navigating my way through the now completely dark room. I made it to the door without running into anything, which seemed like a miracle, and flung the door open. I ran to Serenity's room and without knocking entered. I could make out Serenity on the bed from the moonlight streaming in through the open balcony. She was thrashing around, as if she was struggling against some invisible foe. She screamed again. I dashed to the bed and wrapped my arms around her, bringing her to my chest, praying she wouldn't start screaming even more.

I heard the door to Motoki's room open and the sound of running feet reached my ears. I smoothed Serenity's hair and hugged her to me tightly. "Shh, it's ok," I whispered in her ear, hoping to calm her as she clung to my shirt, pressing herself into my chest. "I'm here, nothing is going to hurt you." I glanced up and saw Motoki rushing to the bed. His hair was a mess and it looked as though he had barely gotten his pants on before running out of his room.

Serenity whimpered as I held her shaking form, whispering words of comfort into her ear. I was sitting on the edge of the bed and feeling rather grateful that our combined weight was not toppling us to the ground.

"What happened?" Motoki whispered urgently?

"I don't know," I whispered back. I kept stroking Serenity back and rocking her gently. Slowly her crying subsided and she stopped squirming, leaning against me fully. I knew she wasn't awake, otherwise I would already be either dead or out of the room.

Motoki stayed there until Serenity seemed to have calmed down completely from her nightmare. I rose to lay her back on the bed, but she still clung to me. I could feel myself starting to fall from the unexpected action, but I managed to fall onto the bed beside her rather than on top. By the end I shifted so that she was on top of me with her head on my chest, her delicate hands still clutching my shirt. I looked helplessly at Motoki who still looked worried.

"Are you going to stay here with her?" he asked.

I sighed. "It looks like I have no other choice," I murmured as Serenity snuggled closer to me.

Motoki nodded. "You better get out of here as soon as she loosens her death grip on you, before she wakes up."

"I will," I replied.

"Fine. I'll check in here early in the morning in case you fall asleep."

"All right," I whispered. Motoki stayed only a few more moments before leaving the room and closing the door behind him.

I turned my attention to the woman clinging to me. She was slumbering peacefully again, the trails of her tears still visible on her face. I started drinking in every detail of her that I could, at least what I could see of her face at that angle.

She stirred against me, letting out a low moan. I inhaled deeply as she pressed her hair to my nose. Bliss. She was so tiny and light and warm, it felt nice having her laying on top of me. Placing a gentle kiss on the top of her head I blessed any gods out there for letting me find her.

My heart started to speed up at the sudden realization that I was holding her, Serenity, my Usagi! She wasn't fleeing from me in terror or hurling things at me, no! I was holding her, touching her, cradling her in my arms; the feeling was euphoric.

I willed my heart to calm down. Now was not the time to get excited. I had to remain calm.

The sound of her deep, even breathing helped calm me down. Soon I found myself feeling drowsy and mellow, slowly slipping back into sleep. This felt right, natural, comforting . I was happy I had been able to sooth her fears, even in her dreams, and that now as a reward I was holding her. I refused to let my heart speed up at the thought, rather letting my mind slip into a peaceful, deep slumber.