CO-OP GAMEPLAY REVISITED
Richter and Alucard are standing outside of a door. A boss (Galamoth) is beyond the door. He's most likely going to kill them.
"Okay, this is what we're going to do. We are going to find a rotten turkey, let me eat it, wait a good two hours, and drown the boss to death with my gastric juices." Richter awaits Alucard's praise for his brilliant idea.
Alucard is silent. "...Richter, that will never work."
It's only been the second scenario but everybody has forgotten about FOOD (AKA: Food Poisoning's Bad, M'kay?) . Everybody but Richter. After all, he was the one vomiting uncontrollably.
Richter sighs sadly. "...Fine, what do you have in mind?"
"Alucard shield plus shield rod combo."
"I have no idea what you just said but let's try it anyway."
Richter was about to walk through the door but Alucard grabs his shoulder.
"Wait! In case of we were to die, my faerie has but one life apple."
"That matters not. We don't suck THAT much!"
The author and her brother glare at the TV.
(LATER)
Richter is lying bloodily on the ground. Alucard is soon in the same position.
"H-holy cr-rap! We really DO suck!"
The author and her brother glare at the TV.
Richter struggles upright to fight off the approaching giant. "Tell Anetta... I loved her... VRAAAAAGH!" He runs offscreen for the final confrontation.
"Richter, NO!"
Too late! Richter has already died!
"You killed Richter! ...YOU BASTARD!"
Alucard tosses holy water at Galamoth. Galamoth steps on Alucard. Alucard is dead and squished.
...But wait!
The holy water works it continuous damage until Galamoth is dead himself.
The faerie familiar walks on (flies on?) to the scene.
"So then I was like 'That's MY man!' and then she was like 'Why don't you fight me, f-er?' and anyway, I cut off Medusa's head and put it on display for everybody to see. Wait... I was supposed to get rid of the head's petrifying ability? Oh crap..."
The faerie sees the dead bodies. She looks to her cell phone.
"...I'll call you back. I have business to attend to." She hangs up. The faerie looks at the measly, and single, life apple she has to work with. She rubs her chin Sherlock Holmes-esque in deep thought. How was she going to revive the them both?
"Aha! I got it!" She drags the two bodies and puts them REALLY close together. She then uses the life apple to revive them in its limited magic range. But it didn't work out the way she wanted it to...
"...Better amscray before they wake up. I value my life!"
She flew off. Our two heroes stir but do not completely wake up yet.
(LATER)
Richter groans sleepily. He reaches a hand out to rubs his face. He hit himself with the Vampire Killer. "Should've let go of that before hand." He finally gets it right this time and rubs his eyes. Richter yawned, and after waking up entirely, he was about to stand up, but he couldn't feel his left arm for some reason.
He looks to see if it's broken, damaged, or even severed.
"Why can't I feel my arm? Is it-?" When Richter turned around, he saw Alucard's head attached to his shoulder. Heck, they were fused together.
Richter was surprised.
"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!"
"Ugh... Richter, why are you screaming? Is that nightmare with the diapers that horrifying?" Alucard tries to stand up also but he comes across the same problem as Richter.
He is also surprised.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!"
Ten minutes of yelling their fused butt off later, curious about their predicament, Richter lifts up the shirt to see that there's a distinct line between his peach-colored skin and Alucard's pale white flesh.
Their thoughts about all of this?
"This... is going to suck."
They get up and waddle awkwardly towards a possible solution for their situation.
They're stuck like this for the rest of their lives.
No, not really.
But it was still a good twelve hours.
This chapter is once again brought to you by PRIVATE and her brother. Remember, you can criticize my ability to play Castlevania, but you can't talk about my brother's MAD SKILLZ. Lest I sic Belmont on your ass. "HYDRO STORM!"