When someone on the GameFAQs forum board asked "How did such a magical soundtrack get stuck with such a crappy credits song?" I answered with this post.

Now lemme tell you...

It happened when THIS happened:

One dark, stormy day; a deliveryboy runs at freakishly high speeds, so fast he leaves his image trailing after him with a blue hue, through a forest. As he runs to the evil castle, AKA Konami's headquarters of choice, owls get scared from the trees and try to fly away from the deliveryboy.

The drawbridge of Konami's castle rises, but, determined to get his paycheck, the deliveryboy deftly jumps it and enters...

KONAMIVANIA

No game-oriented forumboard can say who shall emerge victorious.

The deliveryboy, who despite my calling of 'deliveryboy' is actually 19 years old, enters the inner castle and comes across the throne room--I mean, the conference room. There inside, the konami company heads hiss and cover themselves with cloaks from the light entering from the doorway. "Oh, sorry." The deliveryboy closes the door.

"Ah, much better. Wait, what are you doing here?!"

"I'm a deliveryboy."

"Ack! No! We said we don't want any mail unless it's filled with pure gold or whenever they find out how to stuff supermodels into envelopes!" The Konami CEOs were already traumatized with the accusations that Castlevania had lost it's Castlevania-feel due to incorporating aspects from Metroid. The name 'Metroidvania' had already been burnt into their minds.

"But I'm here to deliver..." He looks at his clipboard. "a copy of Castlevania: Symphony of the Night."

A CEO claps his hands and smiles. "OOOOH! Goodie!" He takes it from the deliveryboy, unwraps the package freakishly fast, and pops the CD into a Playstation.

"Heeeeey..." The deliveryboy gets shushed by everybody in the room. The Playstation's intro plays. After it ends, he speaks. "Hey, why did you guys order a copy of your own game?"

A CEO speaks. "Well, just in case the game is a commercial flop, and when the angry fans come to raid the good ole' castle, we can deny we ever made it. Probably just a pirated version. Since we don't have a single copy in our headquarters, we have to see if it's good game or not. You know, just to see if we should start barricading the castle."

"Well, I'm just letting you know that's MY copy you're going to be BORROWING. I may have dropped the original package somewhere,"

SOMEWHERE...

A kid comes across a brown box. He turns his around to see if anybody around dropped it. He forgot that he was the only one stupid enough to runaround naked in the desert. He opens the box.

Golden light emanates from the opened box onto his face, and angels sing "Halejuah".

BACK TO THE CASTLE...

"But I still spent my $40,"

In the future, eBay scanvangers yell "LUCKY!!!!" angrily.

"fair and square on the game."

The CEO looked at him. "Fine sure, just give us a minute."

The CEO with the controller types "URCHEATINGFATBASTARD" as his name into the game. Alucard has one bagillion points on each stat, has all the relics, familiars are level 100, and Alucard can pass through walls.

Alucard has already defeated Shaft, with a mushroom nonetheless, and Dracula comes up. The CEO smiles at the deliveryboy. "This is a special trick that we programmed for this specific battle. On your controller, all you have to do is enter the input command for a basic Hadouken attack."

"Bleh!"

Dracula dies.

And now the ending comes up.

Alucard: "Hey Richter. Did you know that this ending can only be acquired by cheating?"

Richter: "Uh-huh! Just to tease the few people who gamesharked their way to this ending, this ending MAY be connected to the fabled 'fifth ending', but only their codes weren't good enough. THAT'S RIGHT, YOU GOTTA KEEP TRYING! Lol!"

Alucard: "Lol? Nevermind. But Richter, don't you think it would be awfully mean for gamesharkers who hacked their way here to not be rewarded with something at all? After all, all the effort put into laborious attempts at getting desired results, and to have it all be for naught. The deserve SOMETHING." Alucard turns his head as he's about to cough. "Unless they just read a guide on GameFAQs..."

Richter: "What was that last part?"

Alucard: "Nothing."

Richter: "Ah, okay. If you feel so adamant about rewarding them, then fine. HEY LOOK! LOOKIE LOOKIE! Maria's turning evil!"

Maria: (mouth foaming over)

Maria foams a bit more before everybody bursts into laughter. Richter's slapping his knees, Alucard holding his gut, and Maria nearly doubled over, on the floor from laughing.

Alucard: "Nah... Nah...!" He wipes a tear from his eye. "We're just foolin' ya. Here's the real end...!!"

'I am the Wind' begins to play.

The CEOs begin to freak out.

"HOLY S!!! This isn't what we programmed!!!" The deliveryboy looks at them and wonders why they're freaking out about a pretty mild jazz song.

"Uh, what's wrong with this?"

"We had this awesome song called 'Nocturne' that was supposed to play for the credits!"

The CEOs seem to lose their sanities and try to dispose of all the witnesses of the terrible mistake the made. The deliveryboy runs for his life. He finds himself on a cliff overlooking the castle as black hurricane clouds come and dissintergrate the castle of Konamivania.

The scrolling text comes over the screen.

And now, with the (maybe/not really) deaths of many Konami important-people, the deliveryboy looks at the destruction of Konamivania, and wonders..."What the hell...?". His thoughts carried only carried on by the winds, but only the X buster on his hand knows for certain what will truly--

"...Dang it!!! Forgot to get them to sign the shipping forms!!!" the deliveryboy tosses clipboard onto the ground hardly.

And I hope that answers your question.

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Prove that 13 x 7 equals 28. C'mon. Do it.

The above happens to be my signature.