A/N: Wow, I'm really cruising along with this fanfic. Warp's a rather insistent muse… ;)
The flight back to Planet Z was not a pleasant one. Darkmatter hadn't had a cup of coffee all day, he was out of cigarettes, and to top it all off, his leg was killing him. Half way to his destination he put his ship on autopilot and stripped off his space suit. Howl's mystery weapon had pierced through Darkmatter's armor as well as his skin, leaving a large, circular wound a few inches above his left knee.
The wound itself was bright red and reminded Darkmatter of an insect sting. A hot, throbbing pain was quickly spreading down Darkmatter's leg, and he wondered if Howl had managed to stab a hypodermic into him. It was highly improbable, seeing as Darkmatter held down Howl's arms and legs when he restrained her. Then again, Howl had been full of surprises.
Darkmatter slapped an ice pack on the sting and began to pull his suit back on. Though he preferred his current uniform to his previous green and white one, the one-piece was still a pain in the ass to zip up. A faint clicking sound made him stop dead. Darkmatter's ship made a range of weird noises, but clicking was not one of them. He exchanged his metal hand for his blaster and listened for the sound. Nothing.
"Hornets, get your robot asses up here," he whispered into his com link. "And be quiet about it, okay?" All at once, the lights went out. The ship was completely black. Darkmatter tried to hike up his suit, but it proved impossible to do with only one hand. Wonderful. He was going to die in deep space with his pants around his ankles.
"Tell me, baby…" A sultry voice crooned, "with a body like that, why did it take you so long to beat me?"
"No way," Darkmatter breathed. "There's no fucking way."
"Oh, but there is." A single light cast a dim glow across the small cockpit, revealing a small figure with glowing yellow eyes. Howl was sitting on the dashboard, pointing a blaster at Darkmatter's head. Darkmatter made another effort to pull his suit up, but Howl cocked her gun.
"You shy?" she asked, grinning. Darkmatter realized that she had two small fangs.
"No," he said cautiously. Howl's face was completely covered in blood, but she was definitely in possession of both her eyes, and the hole in her neck was gone. "By the way, didn't I kill you?" Darkmatter added. Howl chuckled.
"Maybe," she said slyly.
"My blaster severed your jugular," Darkmatter continued, feeling his heartbeat quicken. "I made sure of it."
"Well, you know…" Howl's eyes traveled the length of Darkmatter's body. "Here I am. Anyway, I'm rather upset about what you did to me. I'm gonna have to shoot you." She pulled another blaster from a holster at her hip. "My regards to Zurg."
"Sorry, sweetheart." Darkmatter flashed Howl his most charming smile as three hornets entered the cockpit and trained their guns on her. "Looks like you're outnumbered." Howl remained composed, but she lowered her guns.
"I didn't think you'd have your own personal pack of robots," she said, inspecting her nails. "You going to shoot me again?"
"Will you die this time if I do?" Darkmatter asked. Howl shrugged serenely.
"I don't know."
"Well, in that case…" Darkmatter yanked his suit up. "Drop your guns." Howl frowned and placed them on the floor. "Now, would you mind zipping me up?" Darkmatter turned his back to Howl. She silently tugged the magnetic zipper up Darkmatter's back, brushing her fingers against his skin.
"Nice ink," she said, tapping the tattoo on Darkmatter's left shoulder blade.
"Thanks." Darkmatter couldn't help but smile. His mother had nearly thrown him out of the house when he came home with a sun tattoo at age sixteen. "Could you maybe rub my neck a little?" he asked Howl, wishing that he could see the look on her face.
"You're quite a sad little bastard," she said quietly, securing the zipper at the nape of Darkmatter's neck. It melted seamlessly into his suit.
"Call me pathetic, call me what you will," Darkmatter replied. "Hornets, escort Miss Howl to the holding cell." The hornets closed in around Howl. "Now," Darkmatter said, turning to her, "are you going to come quietly?" Howl smirked.
"You'd have to be pretty bad in bed for me to do that," she said, hopping off the dashboard. Darkmatter shook his head.
"I guess I walked right into that one." He was about to handcuff Howl when a long, thin object whipped towards his face. He caught it between two fingers of his metal hand and examined it. It was a tail. Howl's tail. A cruel, metal spike was fastened to the tip.
"What the fuck is this?" he asked sharply, glaring at Howl. She twitched her tail.
"It's what nearly saved me earlier tonight," she sighed, eyeing Darkmatter's injured leg.
"What's in it?" Darkmatter flicked the spike with his thumb. A drop of clear liquid dribbled from the tip. "What the fuck did you stick in me?" Howl remained silent.
Darkmatter backhanded her with his mechanical arm, sending her sprawling to the floor.
"Fucking bastard," she spat, and collapsed.
"Take her to the holding cell," Darkmatter snapped. "And make sure you double-cuff her." One hornet gathered Howl into its arms and left with the others in tow. Darkmatter sank into his seat and switched the ship back to manual. His leg was hurting even more, if that was possible, and a caffeine headache had replaced his hangover headache. Darkmatter tried to put Howl out of his mind and instead focused on the cigarette and the cup of black coffee awaiting him at Zurg's tower. He'd figure out what to do with her later.
A/N: Green Day reference. I'm on a roll.