I guess I have to admit it to myself after being confined to this fucking place for several hours that I really fucked up this time.

I couldn't figure out what was going on and everything was starting to truly hit me now that the drugs had started to wear off. I was scared and tired of worrying about what was going to happen to me. I hated to worry about things, it was one of the reasons that I began using, but that's beside the point right now.

Examining my surroundings I began thinking of a way to distract the two men who were now talking between themselves about when their "master" was going to get there. Along with the realization of everything else I also had to berate myself for being so stupid. These men were death eaters and I was about to meet their ring leader, Voldemort. Definitely not too good at all considering I'm a 'mudblood'.

I really don't see why muggles are so horrible. I mean.. They were the ones that were smart enough to come up with all sorts of things for drugs to make you happy. Obviously all they want is to be happy and I don't see what's so wrong with that.

So anyway.. Back to the interesting part.

After several minutes of scanning the room I finally saw the entrance. There was a small opening between the floor boards beside one of the men and I was prepared to do anything to get there. I pretty much knew that it was my only way out.

Now all I had to do was figure out how the hell to accomplish this without being killed first. Didn't sound that hard, right?

"Ahem, excuse me, what if I have to take a shit?" I asked one of the men that I was pretty sure was Little Blondie Foo-Foo considering I could see a small peak of white blonde hair from under his hood.

"Then you sit right there and take one," he replied with amusement evident in his voice followed by a slight chuckle.

"Well, do you really want to wait any longer in here if it smells even worse? I mean, come on, obviously another one of your prisoners did their business and can you smell that shit?"

Hm, that might have worked somehow. The other man swiftly turned and moving the floor board aside he made his way down I'm assuming for looking for something to either keep the stench away or to keep my bowel movements so they could be easily tossed away. Ugh, this just made me sick.

Quickly, I made my way over to Little Blondie Foo-Foo licking my lips and toying with the edge of my shirt seductively. God, I hope this works. A second later my shirt was falling to the floor and I was centimeters away from Blondie. My hand made its way to his crotch quickly, alarming him for a moment I believe considering he stiffened for just a moment before easily relaxing.

"You don't think by fucking me you can just escape do you?" he asked grabbing at my black lace bra that was my favorite, ripping the strap. Fuck that bastard.

"Of course not, but I'm not dying without getting a little action first. You don't mind, do you?" I asked grinding my body into him forcing his back to hit against the wall. Perfect.

In a mere second I had his wand in my hand by my quick reflexes, which surprisingly were not smoked, snorted, or whatever away. Flicking it quickly I put him in a full body bind and jumped down the hole Mister BoJangles had just left by.

"What do you think you're doing, mudblood?" Jang-Jang asked, confidence and amusement in his voice.

"This," I said with a another flick of the wand putting a jelly leg curse on him only stopping for a second to laugh at his flailing form before running through the next opening I saw.

Hmm.. I wonder if I can apparate here..

"YES!" I screamed once I saw that I was back on Alex's porch.

Thank god for my beauty. At least I have something of use.

"ALEX!?" I yelled, going into his house searching for him. Scared to what I was going to find I was going quite slow and preparing myself for the worst.

As I came into the living room I saw such a disturbing scene I vomited all over the white carpeting at least four times. There he was, my best friend, my lover, pinned to the wall only by one of his swords that was now embedded into his stomach. There was blood everywhere.

No no no, this can not be happening. Not my Alex.. Look at what I did to him! Oh god.. was the only thing that could make its way into her mind.

This was all my fault. I was the stupid one to trust a stranger, I was the one who was a fucking witch and put him in harms way. I deserved to be dead, not him. He deserved to be someplace like heaven, he was one of the sweetest people she knew she would ever meet in her life and he was gone forever.

Running into his room she searched frantically for the only thing she knew would keep her mind preoccupied enough to keep her from killing herself right then. Finally finding what she wanted she held it in front of her eyes. This will do.

Opening the box she pulled out a red ribbon and tied it tightly around her arm. Pulling out the syringe she took quickly and jabbed herself in the vein pushing until every last ounce of heroin was pumping through her.

Running to the front of the house again she began her next search, her purse. She knew that she'd find everything else she needed within it's secret compartments.

Seeing it thrown into the doorway she made her way over to it and started to dig trying to get what she wanted. After feeling the small baggy I pulled it out with ease grinning at my newfound prize. Sitting down I reached under the table in the entryway that held a mirror with a credit card placed on top. She could already feel the powder going through her.. The bitterness overcoming her in the back of her throat.

Dumping the bag's contents she quickly made the lines as to make sure they were done before she felt everything else kick in. Pulling out a cut straw from her skirt pocket she shoved into her left nostril and bent over, inhaling the white substance that sent chills down her spine. She couldn't wait to get of the horrible sober feeling and the fact that she was in her dead best friend's house taking all his unused drugs.

Just now noticing she was topless she went into Alex's room and pulled out one of his shirts but not before savoring its smell. God, she missed him.

Yet suddenly the memory of him pierced and hanging in the next room vanished being replaced by a numbing feeling that went through her entire body. Her mind was a blank and she could barely move an inch.

Figuring there was no way out of there with using her legs she fell unto the floor and began crawling to her purse that held her along with Little Foo-Foo's now. Finally reaching her destination she picked her own up and tried to balance herself to stand up straight. Wobbling horribly she hastily apparated into a house that she had only stepped foot in once before.

"Lily?" one of the boys asked who was now lighting a joint sitting on an apparent overused couch.

The world was now spinning under her feet yet she found this to be quite amusing. Everything around her was turning into a movie, she was detached from each person in the room and believed that they were just actors like herself.

"So, what's the movie called?" Lily asked a dazed smile on her beautiful features.

Everyone at once looked at her casting a strange glance her way wondering what exactly she was on. She was acting more strangely than they had ever seen her and they were the ones that introduced this world of lost memories and crazy nights to her.

"Lily, sit down. Why are you so fucked up? Did something happen?" asked another one of the boys sitting there on the couch. He was now moving towards Lily helping her down into the seat he previously held. "Alex. He's dead," she responded, all emotoins erased from her voice and eyes. All they could see was a blank slate staring out into space. She was completely gone.

"What happened!?" screamed a girl with long brown hair that fell in loose waves shock and sadness showing through her stoned mask.

"I-"

Before Lily could finish her response she suddenly couldn't figure out where she was, who she was, or how she had gotten here. All of the confusion along with the need for complete peace was making her go insane. Several moments later her face fell to the floor, her body sliding out of the chair. She made no move to get up nor did the others, worried about the facts surrounding Alex's death. The way she was acting now proved that she could've definitely killed him and not even known or not even realized what she had done.

She was now trapped in a daze, unable to comprehend anything, and left alone to care for herself. There was no one who could save her now.