This was written and published on August 2, 2006. It has always interested me to think of what had happened on the night Voldermort killed James and Lily.

I chose to do this from Lily's PoV for three reasons. One, James dies first, so there is less of a story (cold, I know). Two, I emphasize mostly with Lily, so it is usually easier for me to write things in her PoV. And three, I wanted to work with the whole mother/child bond thing.

All dialogue after "Lily," James says softly, pushing his face against my hair. "Yes?" is completely canon, taken from the books where Harry has encounters with the dementors and relives the night of his parent's death.

It frustrates me sitting in here and hiding. Some days I cannot take it, and tuck myself away in a corner of the house where I know James will not find me, and I cry.

I cannot stand this, the not knowing, the not helping, the just sitting while the only people that I love are out there fighting in my stead.

Harry always finds me, while I sit shaking with my knees curled up against my chest and tears trailing down my cheeks. I hear him coming, soft thumps as he crawls across the floor, and then a little head with James' messy black hair and my own fierce green eyes peeks around the corner.

"Mama?" he whispers. He has just learned to talk and his words are so garbled that only James and I can make out what he is saying. Harry crawls into my lap, and my body uncurls and folds itself around him as he pats my wet cheeks with his chubby baby hands.

It is Halloween tonight.

The sky is dark. James and I have just put Harry to bed. His first Jack-o-lantern lies on the kitchen table, candlelight flickering from within. James has carved broomsticks and snitches onto it for him, then charmed them to fly across the pumpkin's orange skin.

James is with me now, curled up on the small crimson couch in the living room. I still fit against him perfectly. With his chin tucked up gently against my head and his arm around my waist, I feel safe. I have not felt this way for a long time.

Since we learned the monster wanted our baby.

A fire crackles in our fireplace. The atmosphere in the little house is not so oppressive as it normally is. In fact if I close my eyes, for a second I can almost feel normal again.

"Lily," James says softly, pushing his face against my hair.

"Yes?"

Suddenly there is a scraping at the door, and we freeze.

Every fiber of my body knows what it is outside that door and coming for my baby, my darling Harry. My blood runs cold. James is already up off the couch, pulling his wand out of his robes.

"Lily, I love you," he says, looking at me desperately. In my mind I am thinking Oh James, James I love you so much, but I am still frozen on the couch in horror.

"Lily, take Harry and go!" James yells, breaking me out of my trance. Harry, yes, Harry. I need to save my baby. "It's him!" James yells again. "Go! Run! I'll hold him off –"

I stumble from the room as fast as I can on legs that can barely hold me, brain so numbed from terror I can barely think.

Harry is sleeping peacefully in his cot, soft golden light falling gently across his chubby face. My heart fills with fierce love for him, and I stand protectively in front of my son, reaching in my pocket for my wand.

My hand brushes fabric and emptiness. With a sick feeling in my stomach I realize my wand is downstairs, lying on the kitchen counter. My mind races. Closing my eyes I begin to wordlessly chant the incantations I know will save him if-

A laugh. I hear James's brave voice, and then a dull thud.

James is dead, James is dead, James is dead, and my eyes fill with tears as a dull feeling overwhelms me but suddenly the door bursts open and I am filled with a fighting, powerful strength. I narrow my eyes and glare at the familiar face in front of me.

The monster's slanted red eyes bore into my own and I see that he is enjoying this, he enjoyed killing my husband and he is going to enjoy killing me.

It is oddly quiet and it presses in around us, but I hold my ground. This is all so surreal it feels like an ordinary night except he is here, again, and I am the only thing standing between the monster and the life of my son, and there is no James…

The monster laughs, then. It is high pitched and strikes terror into my heart, but I stand my ground. I will protect my baby boy with the last breath I have.

My mouth opens of its own accord, and suddenly I am speaking to the monster in a voice I never knew I had.

"Not Harry, please not Harry, please not Harry!"

"Stand aside you silly girl…stand aside now."

"Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead –" I am begging the monster, wanting so violently for him to kill me instead of my son.

The monster looks at me, his cold red eyes glinting in the dim nursery light. I catch a glimpse of Harry's face. He is awake now, just stirring from his sleep.

Oh I will die, I will do anything, just to save my son.

"Not Harry!" I yell desperately. "Please, have mercy…have mercy…" My voice breaks.

The monster laughs, and the sound sends chills running up and down my spine. He lifts his wand. I feel as though I am in a dream, everything is so slow and foggy.

I think I see green light but the floor is peeling away from me and I am falling somewhere, falling falling, everything fades…

Before I die, I feel something deep within me. I know.

I have saved my son.