Disclaimers:

See Chapter 1.

Chapter 12: Where Is My Mind

Jez was floating in an azure ocean. The sun was beating down heavily upon her, making her skin tingle and burn. White gulls circled lazily above her, calling to each other in their harsh voices. The gentle, rhythmic lapping of the waves was soothing, threatening to lull her into an even greater state of relaxation and peace. Tropical fish, multicoloured and beautiful flitted gracefully around her body.

Then, amidst the tranquil beauty and serenity surrounding her, Jez frowned. Something was wrong. She wasn't meant to be here. She had promised…someone…something…

A silver fish swam eye-level beside her, sunlight reflecting off its iridescent scales and cascading into a myriad of dazzling colours.

'You're dreaming' It told her. 'Wake-'

"U…p…" She slurred thickly. Her eyes flickered open and then almost immediately flinched shut under the sudden bright glare.

'What the bloody hell?' Jezebel was completely disorientated.

What had happened? Where was she? The last thing she remembered was going out with Gareth and Darren for their anniversary (that couldn't be right, could it?)...And a vague impression of intense heat searing into her skin...accompanied by the choking reek of blood, smoke and sweat…A shudder rippled down her spine as her mind shied violently away from the memory. She didn't want to remember it, whatever 'it' was…

There was another, unconnected, but lingering memory of sky blue eyes boring anxiously into hers too, though she could remember nothing of the face.

'Feels like someone shoved me through an industrial meat grinder…' Opening her eyes cautiously again, Jez blearily examined her environment and struggled to try and sit upright. Unfortunately, her muscles felt like un-set jelly and refused to obey her commands. Finally, she gave up and collapsed panting on her back. Blood pumped madly in her veins at her strenuous -but ultimately failed- effort.

"Boll..ocks …" She mumbled, tongue leaden with the unpleasant sensation it had grown a layer of fur. Taking deep, calming breaths; she began to fully take in her surroundings for the first time.

What she saw filled her with dread.

Sterile white walls, artificial UV lights, and an underlying sense of clinical menace surrounded her, suffocating the very air in her lungs.

Her heart began to beat unsteadily with a visceral fear.

'They found me. Oh damn, they found me…' Her mind panicked. She didn't know how she ended up here, but there could only be one reason why she was in this kind of place. With an effort, Jez stifled a whimper as she caught sight of the sinister tubes feeding into her body.

'Oh fuck, what have they done to me!!!' Jez thought wildly, ripping the offending things out of her body and wincing at the sharp pain as she did so. There were even ones on her head! Fear lent her weakened limbs strength and she managed use the frightened momentum to swing her legs off the bed, dangling limply over the side. She huddled on the edge of the bed, rubbing her arms frantically where the needle intrusions had been and trembling.

It was then she noticed her state of undress. Jez was 'clothed' (if you could call it that) in a thin, papery hospital gown. She could feel a draft on her back where there wasn't any fabric. Another flash of fear shot through her. What had they been doing to her? Where in the hell was she? And where were Darren and Gareth?

Jez shook her head; she couldn't waste time wondering about these things. She had to just find Gareth and Darren and get the heck out of here as soon as she could. Jez didn't think she'd be able to take it if she ended up like her mother.

She slid awkwardly off the bed with a pained grunt, which changed to a hiss of surprise when her legs turned to water and gave way beneath her. Jez rolled as she hit the floor, which mostly masked the sound of impact. She lay, frantically panting on the floor, sick with the realisation that her body was much, much worse off than she'd thought.

She was practically helpless. How long had she been here?! Or was this something else they were responsible for?

An image flickered through her mind; Jon laughing at her as she had cringed and tried to crawl away from his punishing blows. She was vulnerable again, just when she couldn't afford it. Too much was at stake. Shutting her eyes, Jez focused on moving her legs.

'Move.' She willed them. A toe on her left foot twitched. 'You want to wait for them to come back?' Her calf muscle jumped. 'They'll never let you go.' Her whole leg jerked. 'You're going to die here, a nameless science project for some freak to dissect.' Strength surged through her limbs and clinging to the bed, she slowly pushed herself to her feet.

Jez crouched, taking deep breaths to stabilize herself. The miraculous, Herculean effort had left her legs trembling. Her naked body shivered uncontrollably and goose-bumps raised the surface of her sweat-soaked skin. Trying not to think about other possible implications concerning her lack of clothes, she moved quietly forward with all the skill gained from living on the street for so long. Silently, Jez willed her legs not to give out until after she'd escaped.

The door led onto a larger, imposing and even more sterile and unfriendly large laboratory. The lights here were equally artificially bright and sent a wave of nausea roiling through the pit of her stomach. She felt exposed and vulnerable, like an insect under the scrutinising gaze of a microscope. An unrelenting computerised beeping was sounding and she could see lights flashing on computer consoles around the room. Jez felt her herself tremble involuntarily again and berated herself for the weakness.

'Calm down you big wuss.' She chided mentally, and then had to prevent a loud panic stricken gasp escape as she finally noticed a person hunched over a large desk. Their back was to the entrance of the room and in her sudden spiking fear, she was unable to process any features. Her mind immediately flew unthinkingly into the most primitive mode of response as the figure twitched and made as if to rise. Presumably they had finally noticed the noises emitting from the computers.

Stumbling clumsily forward, she grabbed an empty stainless steel tray (used for something she probably really didn't want to know about) and swung it with (considering her weakened state) deadly accuracy into the back of the threat's skull.

Adrenaline surged and she felt the fierce euphoria of animalistic pride as the figure gave a soft sigh and then crumpled to the floor.

"Oh shit…" She rasped as the hot buzz pulsing through her veins abruptly fizzled out and Jez realised just what she had attacked. The metal tray slipped from her nerveless grasp and clattered noisily to the floor.

Jez fell into a bewildered crouch and examined the prostrate body now sprawled on the floor. It was a petite brunette, hair pulled back into a loose ponytail with a charming heart-shaped face which wasn't at all ruined by a slightly upturned nose. She was wearing a casual white tank-top with a 'Hello Kitty!' logo and a pair of beige cargo shorts. In her ears was a pair of headphones, linked up to a laptop.

To say Jez was confused was an understatement.

This wasn't the guard she'd been expecting.

Why had they left this woman (who couldn't be much older than her, for crying out loud) to watch her? Where were the doctors in white coats to sedate and endlessly poke and prod her?

There was something not right going on here, but Jez really didn't want to linger and find out what exactly what it was. She was really worried about Gareth and Darren.

"And why I can't remember anything…" She admitted aloud, her exertions making her voice shaky and harsh. Eyeing up the woman's clothes, she came to a sudden decision.

"Sorry love." Jez muttered as she awkwardly peeled off the garments, leaving the woman in a lacy pink bra and matching knickers, while trying to avoid looking at any exposed (however well-formed…) flesh. Despite Gareth's accusations, she was not a letch…

Straining slightly with her weakened body, she pulled the clothes on, wincing at the feebleness of her limbs.

'Finally, being thin is paying off.' She thought, staring down at herself. Had she been better fed, then the clothes wouldn't have fit. As it was, despite them being a few sizes too small, they still hung slightly loose on her narrow frame. However, the short legs came up a bit too high and, because she had refused to take the woman's underwear, if she wasn't careful, she was in grave danger of flashing someone. After a second's indecision, Jez decided it was the least of her worries. Unfortunately, the shoes were nowhere near a match (the woman had tiny feet) and so she left them with their owner and instead placed the gown she'd been wearing on the unconscious girl. The black tiled floor was freezing cold to her bare feet, but she was used to uncomfortably cold temperatures. England -London- in winter was no laughing matter. Gareth used to have some very interesting phrases to describe it...

Strangely (although it wasn't as if any of this was normal) her hands and face were unnaturally clean, like somebody had scrubbed a layer of skin off. Quickly appraising the rest of her body, she quickly noticed the same thing. Jez shivered as her skin prickled uncomfortably. The thought of someone touching her while she was helpless and unconscious was terrifying. Switching her attention to the task at hand, she cautiously reached out to the woman and lifted back an eyelid. The pupil reacted instantly to the light, shrinking and contracting and she breathed a sigh of relief.

Well, she hadn't caused concussion.

As she placed her fingers to the pulse of the girl's neck, a flash of gold caught her eye and despite her best efforts not to look, her gaze was drawn down to a delicate golden chain hanging around the woman's neck; it held the Star of David.

Jez felt the brief, scavenger urge to take it, before what remained of her morals kicked in. She was not a killer…or a petty thief…

Glancing around again at the unfriendly and clinically cold room, as well its flashing monitors and glittering trays of surgical tools (making her shiver in fear and dread at the sight) she grabbed the woman's feet. Grunting, she pulled as hard as she could, dragging the unconscious woman into the room she'd been in, while trying to ignore the cloying fear and claustrophobia that rose like bile to the back of her throat.

Bloody hell, she hated this room already…

Bracing herself, she then hoisted the woman up slightly and rolled her onto the bed. Taking the thin white hospital sheets, Jez twisted them until it became rope-like and hurriedly bound the the girl's wrists and ankles. Stepping back, she examined her handiwork and wiped a small amount of sweat from her brow, the effort required had left her shaky.

"Done." She rasped, wishing for some water, but the room was empty. Her nerves jangled as she exited the room, picking up the chair the woman had been sitting in and jamming it under the door handle. There. Now she wasn't going anywhere. A brief smirk flickered across her face. Unless she could walk through walls or something. Despite her situation, Jez almost laughed at the notion. She'd always been fascinated by Shadowcats' power.

'Yeah, like that was going to happen…' Something half-forgotten nagged at her mind for a moment, before she brushed it impatiently away. She was wasting enough time as it was.

Drawing in a steadying breath, Jez cautiously made her way past all the medical and computer equipment, flinching at every bleep or whir. She was wound tighter than a spring and ready to explode again, even though she was pretty sure her body would collapse from the effort. After careful exploration, during which she fully expected to be caught by someone, she found the only exit to the lab was a hi-tech lift. There was no sign of Gareth or Darren. Maybe they were held somewhere else? Or maybe they managed to get away...

Suspiciously she pressed the call button. There was a soft 'ding' as the lift doors slid open. Nervously, Jez stepped inside and almost jumped as the door closed after her. Swallowing the immediate urge to panic and bang against the doors, she instead examined the small buttons. Basement 1– Med Lab, Basement 2– Hanger, Ground Floor, First Floor and Second Floor. After the briefest of hesitations, Jez pressed Ground Floor.

'Not far to jump if I have to leave by a window…'

The button lit up and the lift began to smoothly move upwards. Jez began to compose herself, calming her mind and trying to stop the shaking of her hands.

The lift doors opened.

'Alright, let's go.'

She lurched out the doors and glanced quickly up and down. Empty corridors were on either side of her, which to her further confusion were not the industrialised white tiles. Instead, there was soft plush carpet beneath her feet and tasteful wallpaper adorning the walls. Almost immediately, for the first time since awakening, her shoulders relaxed. The oppressive presence of the laboratory lifted and she could breathe properly again. Straightening, she glanced in both directions again and then gave up trying to decide which was the more sensible and just went left.

Her strides were (attempting to be, anyway) measured and confident, faltering only briefly now and then. An important trick she'd picked up from various burglary (and gate-crashing) exploits with Gareth, was that if you looked like you thought you belonged, then people rarely questioned your presence. Unfortunately, the trick was made substantially more difficult by the tremors that kept shaking her legs and the swaying faintness assaulting her head (and that was ignoring the ridiculously ill-fitting clothes). Periodically, Jez was forced to lean heavily against a wall and take several fortifying gulps of air. Up ahead she heard the sounds of excited voices, talking loudly. Jez froze, wondering whether or not to retrace her steps, but the decision was taken out her hands as the voices came too close and she could not make cover in time. Heart thumping anxiously, she continued to take deliberate steps forward, attempting to project an outwardly casual air. This faltered at the sight that met her eyes.

It was a bunch of kids. A little younger than her maybe, but it was hard to tell. They were talking and laughing animatedly between themselves, obviously not a threat.

"-And so I said 'Oh yeah biaytch?' and totally whaled on his face!" A pretty Asian girl with pink sunglasses and a bright yellow duster grinned enthusiastically. As her brain stirred, Jez had the oddest sensation that she'd seen her before.

"Bet that went down well." Snorted a red-headed girl with green eyes and wearing an amused expression.

"Nah…Ol' wolvie pulled me off him and read me the riot act. He's gotten stuffy in his old age…" The girl pouted and the group laughed. Jez's mind was swirling with confusion. Why were there kids in a lab? Why was this part completely different to the place she'd been? Was it just her, or was something about this whole thing eerily familiar? And why in the hell were these kids all American?

Recovering, Jez walked past, staring aloofly ahead, avoiding eye contact and hoping they didn't notice her lack of footwear. She held her breath as she brushed past and only released it once she was a good distance away. The group only spared her a brief cursory glance, their looks lingering on her ill-fitting clothes. As she turned the corner, Jez slumped gratefully against the wall for support and scrubbed her face vigorously with her hands. She was lucky they hadn't paid her any attention. Her body trembled slightly with unused adrenaline and strain. Jez hoped she'd make it out before she collapsed or something.

It was all so damn surreal…

Pulling herself together she continued along the corridor, until it opened out into open hall.

It was alive.

Kids bustled to and fro, laughing, calling, joking and shoving each playfully. Jez stared, but somehow managed to keep walking. She'd never been in a place like this before.

"-calculus next?"

"Homework?!!"

"Oh, you're in trouble now!"

"Aw man!"

"Dude, you are sooo busted!"

The snatches of conversation around her, threw her into a greater state of confusion. 'I'm in a school?'

A set of large oaken doors stood ajar beyond the sea of students and Jez aimed for it, trying to ignore her feelings of helpless consternation. She needed to get out of here…

Jez adopted a more submissive, slumped shuffle, avoiding eye-contact and hunching in on herself. It always worked for when she and Gareth had wanted to be completely unnoticed. It was less tiring to do and somehow managed to make eyes slide away unseeingly from her, to pass unmarked within the crowd.

Or so she thought.

Unbeknownst to Jezebel, a set of interested dark eyes followed her progress across the hall, attracted by the potent mix of fear and confusion exuded by her overstressed body. The shadow detached itself from its hiding place and began stalking the escaping figure, nostrils flaring at the unfamiliar -and wounded- scent.

Outside the air was clear. Jezebel inhaled deeply, taking the indefinable smell of freedom.

'Alright, let's not get too carried away…You're not out of the woods yet…' She chided herself, but couldn't completely contain the small measure of hope filling her heart.

The sun shone brightly and her eyes watered at the exposure and adjustment to natural light. Peering around, she realised wherever it was she had ended up had enormous grounds.

'Flipping heck…' Jez rubbed the back of her neck and began to move stiffly forwards, willing herself to at least get off the property before she broke down. Making her even more uncomfortable was the fact she couldn't shift an unpleasant sensation that she was being watched…

The shadow followed at a distance, carefully stalking its prey. It was curious. As it flitted from shade to shde, a rough, rumbling voice stopped it in its tracks.

"Somethin' caught yer interest darlin'?"

A plume of pungent cigar smoke was exhaled. The shadow snorted softly, trying not to breathe in the distracting smell and turned its head to stare fixedly at the hesitantly limping figure of the tall -but hunched over- girl.

Logan stepped away from the wall he was leaning against and into the sunlight. "Huh." He grunted, grinding the cigar into the ground with his toughened and worn leather boots.

Dark eyes, identical to his, met his gaze in silent question.

"Looks like Emma's girl woke up…"

The young pre-pubescent-looking girl standing before him, cocked her head to one side in a decidedly animal-like gesture.

Laura Kinney AKA "X-23" was Logan's clone. She had been produced by the infamous terrorist organisation, Hydra in an attempt to recreate and improve upon, the Weapon X project's Wolverine.

Snikt.

Two adamantium coated claws shot from between the knuckles on both her hands. Unlike Logan she only possessed two claws on each hand and the rest of her skeleton wasn't coated in protective adamantium. As a result, her body wasn't as resilient or durable as Logan's, but leant the positive aspect of an increased and more powerful healing factor as she wasn't constantly having to repair the damage done by a full metal-to-bone skeletal graft. Laura was also gifted with the same heightened senses and reflexes that Wolverine possessed. This, coupled with the intense conditioning and training she'd received since birth, meant X-23 was a lethal weapon, whose abilities could potentially surpass his own.

Unfortunately she also retained animalistic behavioural patterns and reactions to situations, caused by her isolation at birth and only limited contact to humans in subsequent years. The one person to show any love and affection towards her was Dr. Sarah Kinney, a scientist on the project, who had been the forced carrier of Laura's fetus. It was from her that X-23 gained her human name; Laura Kinnely.

All this, was belied by her child-like appearance. Laura was a short, but gangly ivory pale girl, with long ebony hair that framed equally dark eyes. Logan shook his head at her unspoken query, hiding his disquiet at his clone's behaviour. He understood her, most of the time and liked her too. He just wished he knew how to help her conquer her animal urges, something that seemed nigh on impossible sometimes. Logan wondered if things would be different if she had friends to provide positive role models…But it wasn't like that was going to happen any time soon…most kids here were scared shitless of her...and if he was honest...sometimes he thought they had good reason.

"No need fer that, kid. Let's just round her up." He began to take long, loping strides forward and Laura fell in silently beside him as they started to close in on the unwary girl.

The hair on the back of her neck rose.

Something was not right…

Jez glanced over her shoulder, unable to deny the sensation of eyes on her back any longer.

The man was short, stocky and built like an armoured tank. He had dark hair which was cut short and gelled into pointed tufts…Huh…weird…His muscles rippled visibly through his tight, black short-sleeved t-shirt and faded and torn at-the-knees blue jeans. He seemed vaguely familiar…The other was more of a puzzle; slight and child-like in appearance, she nevertheless possessed the same lithe, graceful movements of a professional dancer.

Or a professional killer.

"Hey kid," The man called, his voice a low rumble. The girl beside him remained quiet, her eyes fixed upon Jez with an animal intensity that was more than a little unnerving.

'Oh bollocks…' Jez swore to herself. She had been stupid to forget about the possibility of security. There was no mistaking the purpose and power behind their movements.

She had a split second of indecision where she doubted her body could rise to the demands of the situation.

But really, she had no choice.

Jez broke into a shambling, limping run, her bare feet slapping the ground while her calf muscles shrieked their protest. Her only hope was to make for the trees…They would provide cover and camouflage at least. It would be much more difficult for them to follow her...the downside was it'd slow her down as well…She drew a sobbing breath, lungs burning and willed herself to move faster.

Behind her, Jez heard her pursuers change their pace as well. Risking a quick glance over her shoulder, she saw the distance between them was closing alarmingly. Her body was failing her with its shakiness and residual stiffness. The persistent burning in her lungs warned Jez that she couldn't hope to maintain the pace she'd set herself for long. Each step Jez took, felt as if she was constantly battling through several layers of molasses clinging to her limbs.

"Damn it kid, stop running, yer hurting yerself!" Grunted the gruff voice close behind her.

'How about 'no'?' Jez's mind quipped as another surge of adrenaline shot through her. It was strange he was worried about her hurting herself, though. Maybe they needed her in undamaged for whatever sick experiment they had planned. Jez refused to believe this was how things would end after surviving for so long.

She couldn't.

It was like all her nightmares come true.

With your feet in the air and your head on the ground
You tried this trick, and spin it
Your head would collapse, but there's nothing in it so you ask yourself


Where is my mind?
Where is my mind?
Where is my mind?


Way out in the water
See it swimming


I was swimming in the carribean
Animals were hiding behind the rock
Except for the fish and it told me
I swear it was trying to talk to me
Saying,


Where is my mind?
Where is my mind?
Where is my mind?


With your feet in the air and your head on the ground
You tried this trick, spinning
Your head would collapse but there's nothing in it so you ask yourself


Where is my mind?
Where is my mind?
Where is my mind?


Way out in the water
See it swimming

The Pixies, Where Is My Mind

Author Notes:

Just in case…

Weapon X was a clandestine government project conducted by the Canadian Government's Department K (and secretly funded by the US government) which turns willing and unwilling beings into living weapons. The project often captures mutants and experiments on them to enhance their superpowers and also mutates baseline humans. For example, Wolverine and Sabertooth.

Weapon X was part of a larger program: Weapon Plus, a United States supersoldier program created in the 1940's with the purpose of creating supersoldiers and assassins not only to be employed in conventional wars, but also to be employed for the extermination of mutants. Weapon X was the first installation of Weapon Plus that victimized mutants.

What the Weapon X scientists did not foresee is that the experimentation on Wolverine would cause him to go on a murderous ramage, which allowed the escape of the other test subjects, and caused the deaths of the Professor and Dale Rice, among dozens of other members of Weapon X staff, both scientists and military.

Weapon X was temporarily shut down but eventually was reinstalled. Subsequent attempts at recreating the success seen by Weapon X with Wolverine include the feral woman called the Native, and X-23, the 23rd attempt to clone Wolverine, who was designed to also hunt down rogue agents. The Weapon X re-creation Project was headed by Dr. Zander Rice, Dr. Sarah Kinney and Dr. Martin Sutter.

Next chapter up as quick as I can (school is still being a major obstacle). I would recommend people putting this on their alerts, if they haven't already done so. It'll save you having to check back constantly. Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter! Seems people haven't forgotten this yet, which is very heartening.