Hey guys. Thanks sooo much to everyone and anyone who put me in favorites/alerts. I got about 7 emails of that nature this morning, I almost cried I was so happy. You don't even know how excited I was! I wasn't sure who should be in the King's Room so I'm just going to put whom ever I want in there, kay? Sorry if it doesn't make sense, I guess this story's pretty much AU. Well, anyway...here we go.
What Not To Do At Bloor's Academy
4. NO TAKING PICTURES OF MATRON AND PLAYING 'DOCTOR'.
"Come on, Charlie Bone! You are going to be late for homework!" squawked Charlie's evil aunt who just happened to be the Bloor's Matron. She had a firm grip on his ear as she dragged a writhing Charlie to the King's Room for homework, he was ten minutes late. "Honestly, Charlie! How do you think your behavior makes our family look?"
"Not any worse than your face." he mumbled, still in pain due to his ear being ripped off his face.
"What? more insubordination? That's detention for you! Now get in there!" she thrust him through the open door to the King's Room, his red ear was met by snickering from the opposite side of the table. The 'bad' side of the table consisted of Manfred, Asa, Joshua, Idith and Inez, and Dorcas (a/n hate her!!! If I'm forgetting someone you think should be there, let me know, I've read all the books but not everyone else has.). The side closest to Charlie was the 'good' side with Tancred, Lysander, Emma, Gabriel, Billy, and himself, because that's where he sat down.
"What's up, Charlie?" Billy whispered.
"Nothing. I just can't stand Matron. Not only is she at school, but then she comes over on weekends. It's a friggen nightmare." He pounded his fist on the table.
"Lock you lips, Bone or I'll lock them for you." said Manfred, barely looking up from his book.
Charlie smiled promiscuously. "Is that a promise, Manny?" the whole room looked up at Manfred who, much to everyone's surprise, looked up and returned the same smile.
"Well, you're a saucy boy today." Everyone was so shocked that it was another 10 minutes before Manfred finally made them work.
"Erm, so you were saying, Charlie?" Billy whispered again, glancing at Manfred for safety.
Charlie's smile reversed and a scowl took it's place. "I just really wish I could get back at her for all the crap she's done. Or at least for giving me detention."
"I know how you feel, but what can you do?" Billy smiled sympathetically and returned to his homework. Charlie sighed and did the same. Then he had what he believed was an epiphany. A smile once again crossed his face. 'More than you know, Billy.' he thought evily.
Late that night, had anyone been awake they would've seen Charlie Bone going through his bags for a digital camera. Bloor's students were not allowed to have technology while at school but Charlie had always kept his camera tucked away, just in case. Next they would've seen him sneak out of his room into the dark hallways with the camera in his pocket.
He had recently discovered exactly where it was that Matron slept while at school, an old room in the back of the building. in all black apparell, he crept to her gloomy room, humming his own theme song. "Dum dum da dum, budda budda, dum dum duddle uddley ooooooooompshaw..." When he finally reached his destination, he pulled out his camera and hid in the shadows. His aunt was in bed, snoring grotesquely. "Dum dum da dum..." he hummed even softer. "Here goes nothing." He hit the zoom button on his camera and went straight for her face. He then jumped through the door and ran off into the night. Laughing maniacally. Then he realised where he was and shut the hell up before he got another detention.
Charlie walked down the corridors that morning, looking very tired, and met up with Fidelio and Gabriel.
"Why so tired, Charlie? Been up all night working?" Gabriel teased.
"HA!" Charlie guffawed. "You might say that...dum, budda budda."
"What was that last bit?" Fidelio asked. Then looking at the floor, he noticed the many papers thrown about.
"Oh, noth--"
"OH! MY! GOSH!!! HA HA HA!!!" the interuption came from none other than Olivia, who had picked up one of the many papers scattered around. The second she screamed people began scrambling to pick up a paper. The shuffeling was followed by papers being picked up and then more screams of billowy laughter erupted and shook the entire building. Gabriel, seeing the mess that had been unleashed, naturally, lunged at the ground and brought up one of the papers.
"Oh my..." said Fidelio.
Charlie looked unsurprised but smiled evily. "Gee, what is it?" Gabriel just smiled as huge as his face would allow. In his hands he held a copied picture of a voluptuous woman, wearing just about nothing, in a scandalous position with another woman who seemed a bit off. The other woman was very large, very naked and had the head of Bloor's very own Matron Yewbeam.
"Ha, what a sexy beast." said Gabriel.
"WHAT?" Fidelio stared at him crazily.
"The caption, genious. Gah!"
A few moments later the teachers began fludding into the hallways, ripping papers from students hands and crinkling them up, though the vast majority were having a very hard time containing their laughter. Once the students had finally been ushered vigorously into their class rooms, the day began to seem almost maybe about normal. Just as everyone began to get serious, the loudest scream in the history of screams ever heard at Bloor's (and there had been a lot of them) was heard as it billowed out from the back rooms of the school.
Charlie Bone only laughed harder.
Author's Note:
Lol. There you go. Poor Matron...NOT!!! Mwahahahahahahahahahaha. I love being evil! Updates are coming soon. ;-D