Blueberry Blue

Extra long post!! With smut!! ( There you go Lydia!! D )

So sorry I've been neglecting my posting and everything. I hope I didn't lose any readers along the way. But good news, I got a new laptop and I love to type on it so I'll probably get updating a lot more. I am really, really sorry. I feel so bad about how few and far between my updates are. I really feel bad. Forgive me?

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Jude walked into G-Major ready to help out setting everything up. But by the time she got there everything was already set up. Tommy walked up to her and kissed her cheek. "Hey miss MC. Are you excited?"

Jude could barely look at him, she felt so ashamed. "Yeah, I guess you could say that."

Tommy smiled and grabbed her hand. He brought her into a back room. She looked at him questioningly. "What's going on?" she asked. He leaned down and kissed her sweetly. "I miss you, Jude. I want you to be able to trust me. I love you. Now do you want to tell me what that hysteria was about last night?"

Jude shook her head. "I…I love you too. And, I just, I care about you so much!!" The tears started coming again. Tommy pulled her closer to his chest as she cried. He made soothing noises and whispered sweet nothings in her ear. She finally calmed down and pulled away.

"I need to end it. I only ruin you." Tommy shook his head. He felt tears coming to his eyes. "Jude, what are you talking about?"

Jude just continued to shake her head as she backed away from him. "I can't, I can't…." she whispered over and over.

"I want to be with you Tommy, but this is best for you. I ruined your life."

A few tears ad made their way down Tommy's cheeks now, as well as Jude's. "Goodbye," Jude all but whispered. She kissed his cheek and turned around to leave the room. "Please don't do this, you don't mean it." Jude shook her head, her hand on the doorknob. "I'll always love you, it's always been you, Tommy."

With that, she left. Leaving Tommy heartbroken and confused.

Jude walked into the main room; she could already hear people entering. "Hello everyone!" She yelled, getting everyone's attention. She wiped her tears from her eyes, but she could barely keep the hurt out of her voice. She saw Sadie from the corner of her eye and tried to send her a look, showing her exactly what was going on. But Sadie just sent her an angry, hurt look and turned away.

Jude took a deep breath and turned back to the awaiting crowd. "How is everybody tonight??" The crowd cheered, already it was filled with fans. She wondered how Darius got everything together so quickly. 'Oh well,' she thought, 'don't question the greatness.'

Suddenly, John joined her on stage. "Alright everybody give it up for our MC tonight!!" he shouted. The crowd cheered again. John walked over and wrapped his arm around her waist. Jude felt a little uncomfortable. She had just broken up with Tommy, like, three minutes ago. She gently pushed John away and grabbed his hand. "And let's give a hand to the planner of this lovely event." She raised John's hand and the crowd cheered again.

John brought his hand back down and the microphone to his lips, "Alright everyone, but on a more serious note. We wanted to state a few needed recognitions for tonight's event. Thank you Darius, for planning and funding this amazing event. Thank you G-Major staff for helping to set up and give us a place for this party. Thank you to all the stars in the back room, devoting their time to sign autographs for you folks. Thanks you Jude, for hosting our event tonight. And finally," he looked to the ceiling, "Thank you Reid. I know this is a cheesy line, but we know why god wanted you close to him-because you were truly an angel on earth. You were the most amazing brother any guy or girl could ask for."

The crowd cheered and Jude grabbed John's hand. That one gesture gave him that much more strength. He turned to the crowd. "And of course, thank you! All of you, made this fundraiser possible and helping out with this scholarship."

The crowd continued to cheer. Jude smiled as John waved and walked off stage. "Well I guess that's all I can say as an opening. Thanks John." She laughed. "We have some great food, help yourselves. Right in the back we have various artists and stars. Including our very own Tom Quincy of Boyz Attack, Craig Manning: solo artist, John Cena: solo artist, Mason Fox: No. 2 Instant Star winner, Karma: Instant Star 3 winner, Vincent Spiederman, Kyle Bateman, and Wally Robbins of the Spiederman Mind Explosion, Sweet Thing, and also, the Big Darius Mills himself! Many other stars will also be included. I, myself, will be drifting between back there and up here. Please enjoy the benefit, and remember, we're doing this for Reid. Any donation will be greatly appreciated and please enjoy the amazing slideshows set up around the room. Thank you, and have a great night."

Jude stepped off stage and walked over to her table. A line had already formed and there was a stack of pictures from her latest photo shoot for her to sign. The first girl stepped forward and smiled, asking for a signed photo and a posed picture. Jude smiled and nodded. She smiled at all the right times and said all the right things. But it didn't take her long at all to notice that Tommy's table was located right next to hers. He looked really hurt, Jude could tell that some of the fans were disappointed with how their pictures came out but didn't dare say a word.

Darius stood after about an hour and told everyone to enjoy the music playing outside and to give the stars a little break. Everyone started to clear out and most stars started to stand and stretch a little. Tommy stood from his seat and walked over to her table. He perched himself on the edge, right next to her. "Jude, what happened before? I don't really understand."

Jude shook her head, "What's not to understand Tommy? I ended it. You, me, we're over."

She gathered some of the papers that were still on her table and walked out. She walked back onto the stage and the crowd cheered as the music dulled. "I want to, once again, thank everyone for coming. The stars are taking a quick break, but please enjoy this amazing music and the caterers have started serving the dinner. So please enjoy tonight."

The group cheered as Jude stepped off the stage again. John grabbed her hand before she could get back to her table and dragged her over to the dance floor. "Oh no, Cherry. All work and no play makes Cherry get sour." Jude groaned as John pulled on her arms. "C'mon, I know you'd rather dance with Quincy but can't you just humor me?"

Jude just gave him a look. "Oh…" John said in realization. A slow song drifted through the speakers and John took the opportunity to pull Jude close. "Cherry, I'm sorry. What happened? Did the asshole do something because you know, me and the guys, we'll take him out."

Jude just shook her head and pulled John closer again. "No, it was me. I'm no good for him. He's way to good for me."

John hooked a finger under her chin and forced her to look up at him. "Cherry, don't talk like that. If anything you're too good for him. You're too good for any of this. You could get whoever you want."

Jude just looked down, "Maybe you're right. Maybe I just need to get away. I need to forget about everything going on here."

John took a deep breath 'it's now or never,' he thought. "Cherry, I know you could do whatever you want. You're sure as hell good enough to. I just hope you wouldn't want to."

Jude looked up at him, confused as to where he was going with this. He looked into her eyes and took a deep breath, forcing himself to continue. "I love you, Jude. I always have, and I'm guessing I always will. I never stopped."

Jude's jaw dropped. She had thought that John still wasn't ready to move on but she never thought he still loved her. "John, I'll always love you." She tried.

John shook his head, "That's not what I mean and you know it. I love you Cherry. Love as in I want to move in with you. Be able to kiss you and hold your hand. And give you my jacket when you're cold. But most of all, I want that ultimate closeness. I want to make love to you and wake up with you in my arms. I want us Cherry, Because Jude, you've got to face it, we fit."

Jude took a deep breath and looked into John's eyes, so full of life and passion. And love. Love for her.

Suddenly John was pulled away from her. Tommy threw him onto the floor. "Son of a bitch! You were supposed to be a brother! We're family!! And an hour after we break up you're confessing your love for my girl?! No way! No way in hell!" Tommy yelled. His voice then dropped down to a menacing whisper, "All those times you wanted Jude at your place but you two wanted to be alone, I get it now. You were taking her, taking the one girl I've ever loved enough to die for her."

Tommy let go of John's collar with a shove. "I get it," he said again. He turned to Jude, "I get it, now," he said, sounding disgusted.

Tommy walked out of G-Major. Darius let him go, a sympathetic gaze following him. Jude reached out a hand to him retreating back but let him go. She couldn't fix this, not tonight. She had to. She had to let him go.

Sadie watched behind the curtain on the stage. A smile on her face as Tommy walked out and Jude helped John off the floor. Jude was finally realizing what was truly important to her; at least what should be truly important.

Tommy wasn't meant for her.

'He was meant for me." She thought. She looked to the ceiling and thought about Reid and Paul, 'at least they had each other.' She thought again. She suddenly felt the need to talk to someone, someone who wouldn't judge her. Had she taken extremes when she told Jude about the abortion? She left G-Major and got in her car, heading for the church near the family's ranch. Maybe she'd be able to talk to Reid and find some salvation. Some sign.

She needed her husband.

Jude helped John up and they walked to the car. Darius kept everyone's attention on him as they left, hoping to create a diversion and keep the energy alive. So far it was working. Jude sent him a thankful look and he just gave her a small wave.

Although John wasn't hurt, Jude insisted on him putting his arm around her shoulders and she wrapped her arms around his waist. "So, about what I said before…" John started.

Jude took a deep breath. "John, I'm just a little confused right now. I'm sorry."

John nodded. "Just promise you'll think of it, Cherry?" He pleaded.

Jude turned o face him, "Already thinking about it." John gave her a small smile before leaning in a placing a gentle kiss on her lips.

Jude let him kiss her, comparing it in her mind to when Tommy had kissed her earlier. They were both different, but similar at the same time. Tommy and John both kissed with such love, and such passion. But Tommy's lips were softer than John's, but John felt a lot different than Tommy. This wasn't helping her any,

Jude pulled away and licked her lips, smiling. John smiled too and got in his car. Jude got in the passenger side. "So, you want to stay at my place tonight? Something tells me Tommy needs a little while to cool off. Staying there might not be such a good idea."

Jude nodded, playing with her fingers in her lap. John silently started up the car and headed for his apartment.

After the twenty-minute drive, silent the whole way, John pulled into the parking garage and into an empty spot. He and Jude both exited, still silent, and into John's apartment. John led her to the guest bedroom. "If you need anything you know where my room is, just come on in." Jude nodded, still looking at he hands.

John suddenly grabbed her hands and held them up to his face. They were a bit sweaty, form the obvious stress she was feeling, but other than that she had her star ring on and that was it. "What're you doing?" Jude asked. John shrugged, "Trying to see what's so interesting. You've been staring at your hands for half an hour now."

Jude rolled her eyes and pulled her hands away from John's. "Look, I'm just stressed, okay? I'm sorry I'm not very attentive."

Jude shrugged, "Well I'm not going to lie, I'm not very interesting. Just, yell if you need me, okay?"

Jude nodded and walked into her room for the night. John silently closed the door and walked to his own room. He stripped down to his boxers and just climbed into bed. It had been a long day.

Jude was in some sweats of John's. She knew he kept a few pairs of pants and sweatshirts in the dresser for when the guys spent the night or something and needed something.

Jude was tossing and turning, this vague idea that something was wrong kept driving her insane. She was finally drifting off when suddenly she rolls to one side of the bed. The weight of another person dipping down the mattress. She flopped right into another body. She quickly pulled herself away and sat up. She tried to make out the figure in the moonlight. "Lucas?"

The blond looked up at Jude and smiled. "Oh Cherrrrrrry! Wow, it's just a pa-paaarty ain't it?" He slurred.

"Luke, are you drunk?"

Lucas started laughing hysterically. "You know, drunk. It's such an interesting word. Isn't it Cherrrrrrry? Who came up with that?!"

Jude shrugged, "Luke, did something happen with Brooke?"

Lucas shrugged. "I don't know. She's visiting her mom remember? I haven't seen her in a week. I miss her." Lucas said sadly, leaning over to rest his head in Jude's lap.

Jude rolled her eyes and ran her hand through his hair like a mother would, "It'll be okay Lucas. She'll be home in four days."

Lucas nodded, snuggling closer into her knee. "You're comfy Chers."

Jude sighed, "Thanks, go to sleep now."

She heard Lucas take a deep breath and she knew he had closed his eyes. Within a few minutes she heard his steady breathing, She gently moved his head, cradling his neck with her hand, and laid him on the pillow. Lucas stirred slightly but didn't wake. Jude was grateful. She quietly placed her feet on the hardwood flood and tip toed to the hall. She closed the bedroom door behind her and walked into John's room. Knocking softly before entering.

She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw he was still awake. "Oh good, you're awake."

John moved his hands from behind his head to his lap as he sat up. "Yeah, I heard someone walking around out there, I was just going to come check it out, make sure you were alright."

Jude nodded, walked closer to the bed. "Yeah, I'm fine. Lucas just showed up. He looked a little buzzed. He didn't know I was in the guest room and plopped himself right in there. But he's okay now, sleeping. He just startled me is all."

John nodded, "Well I guess you'll stay in here tonight. I'll stay on the couch. No need for you to sleep in there with Lucas and his disgusting alcohol breath along with his morning breath."

Jude couldn't help but make a disgusted face. "Ew." John just nodded as he grabbed a pillow and walked to the closet to get a blanket.

Jude gently grabbed his hand. "You don't have to do that. We've slept in the same bed before, hell we've even slept together. There's no reason for you to sleep on the couch. Unless of course you feel uncomfortable, in which, I'll take the couch." She rambled, as she started to reach for the pillow for herself.

John pulled the pillow out form her reach. "Fine, then no one sleeps on the couch. I was just trying to make things more comfortable for you."

Jude shrugged and turned toward the bed. She got a running start and jumped into the fluffy white sheets and pillows. "God, I love this bed. I thought about stealing your mattress once of twice, and blame it on the Front Brothers."

John chuckled and slid between the covers as Jude just buried her face in one of the many pillows.

Jude looked at John, all laughter ridden from her face. "You know this is hard for me, but I am going the make the right decision. I'll always love you John."

John smiled and leaned toward her. He kissed her softly at first but the passion quickly took over.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" He asked, "Last time we did this you chose Tommy. I don't think I can go through that again."

Jude shook her head, "I love you, but I am honestly clueless as to who is right for me."

John leaned forward again, "Well then let me try to help you to decide."

Jude accepted the tentative kiss he placed on her lips. She reached behind his neck to pull him closer.

John rolled over so her was hovering over her. The only things touching her were his lips. He placed his hands on either side of her chest, holding himself up. His legs were between Jude's. Jude pulled him closer, wrapping her arms around his neck.

John bent his elbows so his body lowered over hers. Now resting on his elbows, he used his free hands to pull his sweatshirt off Jude's body. It was easy because of how large it was on her and she had sat up. He reached down and took her breast in his hand. He felt no material of a bra and then dipped his head low to take the other breast in his mouth.

Jude placed one hand behind her, supporting herself, and the other had cradled John's head against her chest. She threw her head back and groaned. "John…" He knew her body just about as well as anyone.

The first time they were together was the most special. Every time after that they strove to make that same kind of magic, but they always fell just a tad short. Tonight, John was determined to make Jude feel that same magic again.

John released her breast and gently took hold of her waist. He kissed lower and lower before meeting the waist of the pants she wore. He pulled the sweats down to her knees before kissing up her left leg; his right hang running simultaneously up her left leg.

Jude, now leaning on both hands to support her, closed her eyes, and let her love for John take over.

John pulled Jude's black lace boy shorts down her legs. When they met with her sweats he pulled both items of clothing off of her all the way. On his way back up to her core he bent her knees and then pushed them down to the bed, spreading her legs. John placed a light kiss at her opening, making Jude squirm. He kissed right near her thigh, and then her other thigh, before kissing her core again. He then slipped a finger inside of her, then two. He pulled them out before pushing them back in and curling them. Jude moaned, her eyes still closed in pleasure.

John placed a rough kiss against her clit, making Jude rush to the brink of an orgasm. Feeling her clit engorge again his lips, John knew she was close. He pulled away all together and leaned up to kiss Jude. He did so before she could complain.

Jude leaned over and kissed down his neck, as she did so she pulled down his boxers. John gulped when he felt her brush again his erection. Jude just smiled sweetly at him before lying back on the bed. "Please John, make love to me." John looked at her, a soft smile on his lips. "I love you Jude."

Jude smiled and nodded, "I know, I'll always love you John."

John kissed her and slipped his tongue into her, just as he slipped his erection between her legs. Jude moaned as he filled her. There was something different about tonight.

John began to move into her, slowly. He felt Jude tentatively wrap her legs around his waist, almost in a shy way. And just then he knew he had succeeded in recreating that magic of their first night together.

John moved in and out of her at a steady pace. It wasn't rough at all. In fact, the feeling and John slowly pulling and then slowly pushing back in soothes her. Jude allowed him to grab her hands and pin them above her head. Jude smiled as John leaned down to kiss her neck sweetly. Jude leaned her head to the side to give John more access.

John moaned, the feeling of her walls tightening around him was getting to be too much. Jude smiled and giggled slightly as John let his fingertips brush against the underside of her arms, barely brushing against the skin. His hands traveled under her arms, across the side of her breast, and down her sides. He grabbed her hips and let his one hand reach between them to rub against her still engorged clit. Jude moaned as she was brought to an orgasm. "John, oh god…" She panted.

John smiled as his name escaped her lips exhaustedly. John began to pump just a bit faster; Jude rode out her powerful orgasm. John then let go and shot out into her. Jude smiled and John collapsed next to her and pulled her close, close enough to rest on his chest. Jude heard John's steady breathing and she knew he was fighting off sleep. Jude let him give in, as well as herself, to the darkness of dreamland.

Jude awoke with her head lying on a hard chest. She smiled and snuggled closer to it. She felt strong arms wrap around her waist. "Mmm, I love you Tommy." She whispered.

She name sounded foreign after the night before. Jude felt it and looked down. Images of the night before flashed in her mind. She looked down at John and sighed in relief to notice her was still asleep and hadn't heard her.

Jude pulled away, the depth of what she had done really set in. She wiped her eyes and collected her clothes. She wrote a note to the sleeping John and kissed his lips softly. She grabbed her bag was out the door. She hadn't noticed that it was still nighttime. She looked at her cell phone and realized it was only one in the morning. She and John hadn't been sleeping for that long.

She got in her car. She promised herself she wouldn't hurt John again, but she knew that sneaking out she was doing just that. But she needed time to herself. Had she done the right thing by ending it with Tommy, or had she don't the right thing by sleeping with John. Maybe she did belong with John, she did keep going back to him.

She thought about it as she started the car and drove. She didn't know where she was gong but her mind took over, as if she was on autopilot, and just drove.

Jude felt a tingling feeling spread across her scalp. Knowing the feeling as stress she pulled to the side of the dirt road she ended up on. When the feeling reached her eyes, it stung. The thought brought tears to her eyes. And she let them fall freely.

Jude slammed her hands down on the steering wheel, tears pouring down her face. "Paul, what did I do to deserve this? Help me decide…" She cried to the sky.

She shouldn't be trusted with decisions such as these. She couldn't handle it.

Suddenly lightening struck. Then rain started to fall. "Reid…" She whispered to the sky. She got out of the car and fell to her knees. "Reid! Paul, help me!!" She yelled. The tears and rain blanketing her voice. But she continued to yell anyway. "Help me! Send me something! Please!"

Suddenly her headlights flickered. She hadn't even had them on. They flickered on and shone straight ahead. Jude followed the light and saw it engulfing the old church. She had ended up right near their family's old ranch. She saw another car at in the parking lot, the only car. Jude looked to the sky, silently thanking her brother and Reid.

She took off running, through the rain, to the direction of the church.

Jude had made it to the big, wood doors and she just wrapped her arms around the frame. She looked at the inside and took a deep breath. A head of beautiful blonde hair caught her eye. She turned toward the figure. It was a woman; she was on her knees, praying.

Jude felt something nudge her from behind. She turned and saw Reid, smiling. She turned back to the church, only to whip around again to look at Reid, but his figure was gone.

Jude turned back to the church and entered. She dipped down to her knee and did the sign of the cross before entering further.

Jude looked over at the woman and recognized it as Sadie.

She gasped and listened to her sister's confession. "Reid, it's me. Look, I know you probably know what's going on with Jude. But I just got so mad. I'm sorry I never told you that it could have been Tommy's. And I'm still sorry that I got rid of it. You would have made a great father, and a great husband."

Jude gasped. 'Husband? Father? Reid?!'

A/N: ahaha, cliffhanger-ish. Until next time lovies! What will Jude's reaction be? How will Sadie explain herself? How will Tommy react to the news?