A/N: Oh, your reviews always make me so happy! padfootslittlegirl – Aw, thanks, hun. I want to hear Sirius say some vows, too. But its not just about them being gay, it's more about neither of them being secure in their relationship. Captain Oz – Thanks, sugar! I'm glad both the angst and smut meet your approval. :) KatanaKira – Remus was trying to get him to talk about it, and he said they'd 'talk about it later' but they never did, did they? Well, in this chapter you'll see more of both of them dealing (or not dealing, in Sirius's case) with what happened to Regulus. Thanks for the lovely review, sugar. KawaiiMegami86 – Aw, thank you. Well, like I said earlier, it's not just about them being gay (although that's part of it, obviously). I think the main message I was trying to get across during the wedding was that Remus and Sirius don't really know where their relationship stands and they're both really insecure about it. JennytheSpam – Oh, I hate when that happens! Well, thanks for the review anyways, love. I know I wasn't very subtle about Lily's "secret", but it's hard to keep a story like this suspenseful when all of you already know the ending! LOL. Katrina – Thanks, sugar. :) Tayler – Well, more angst, less boy!sex, but I hope you love this chapter just as well. LOL. Thanks for reviewing as always, love. WhiteWolfCub – Thank you! Here's your update. :) CrazyWriterChick – Oh, wow, thank you. I love turning people into Remus/Sirius shippers! And I'm so glad you enjoyed 'Seventeen'! Because I Need More Space – Thanks, hun:) Jasmin21 – LOL. Well, thank you. I think I'll just concentrate on getting through my first year of college for now. Then I can worry about getting rich and famous and forgetting about the little people. :) Hpfan4life1313 – Thank you! I'm glad I got a squee for the wedding! Sometimes I think there is entirely too much angst in this fic.

Disclaimer: Still not mine. Not even the phrase 'sprog of prongs' which is actually the title of another excellent R/S fic I once read.

Warning: None. Except the gayness of the two main characters. Do I really have go over this every chapter?

Rating: T – for the swearing and the drinking and what-not.

Sorry again for the late late update. Starting college seems to take up quite a bit of time. Who whudda thunk?

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Chapter Five: Truth

Remus and Sirius stood beside the newly covered grave, the chill of early March pulling at the sleeves of their cloaks as if urging them away.

"Let's go," Sirius said softly, almost pleadingly.

Remus looked up at him abruptly, as if startled by the sound. It was the first words either of them had spoken since they had arrived.

Sirius hadn't wanted to come in the first place. He hadn't gone to the funeral either, muttering something about having to see 'that old hag'. Ever since that day in the hospital, he had refused to talk to Remus about Regulus's death, or even the role Regulus had played in Remus's own abduction and subsequent rescue.

In fact, Remus sometimes thought bitterly, as he lay in bed at night, they didn't talk about anything anymore.

Remus wouldn't give up, though. He wanted to pay his respects – or so he'd snapped at Sirius that morning – and Sirius had reluctantly grabbed his cloak and tagged along. Now, as he stood in front of the grave that held Sirius's seventeen year old brother and listened to Sirius beg for permission to leave, he felt like screaming.

It wasn't as though Sirius ever used to be very open about his family, quite the opposite in fact. Yet, still, Remus used to be able to coax things out of him. He knew Sirius's relationship with Regulus had been complicated, probably a hundred times more so after Remus's capture. He knew Sirius must be full of hurt and confusion. All he wanted Sirius to do was show that emotion somehow, to shout, or kick something, or go into to one of his rants about how Regulus was always the favorite or how it was all his fault because he could have been a better older brother.

But all Sirius did was work all day, then come how late at night reeking of alcohol, clutching to Remus desperately as if he were his last salvation.

"Fine, let's go," Remus agreed gruffly.

He turned away from Regulus's grave without allowing himself to look back. He was beginning to wonder if there would be salvation for any of them.

& & &

"So, how's he doing?" Lily asked later that afternoon, offering Remus one of the two tea cups she was holding. He sat across from her in the kitchen of her new flat which was still half unpacked since she and James had only just returned from their honeymoon.

"You know…he's Sirius," Remus answered with a shrug, but she nodded, understanding his meaning.

He had shone up rather unexpected, but Lily was playing the gracious hostess as always. There was always a comfort level with Lily that Remus could never find with anyone else. He could talk to her about anything. She was the first person to discover his lycanthropy. She was the first person he told about his relationship with Sirius.

"How was he at the funeral?" Lily pressed, her brow slightly wrinkled in worry.

"He didn't go," Remus muttered, tracing the edge of his tea cup instead of drinking it.

Lily leaned forward in surprise.

"He didn't go?" she repeated. "But Regulus was his…"

"It's complicated," Remus interrupted.

"But what about you?" he asked, suddenly not wanting to talk about Sirius anymore. "How did James take the news?"

Now it was Lily's turn to play with her tea cup uncomfortably.

"I didn't…it just…we were on our honeymoon, you know?"

"You didn't tell him," Remus sighed, finishing Lily's rambling for her.

Lily hung her head dejectedly.

"I tried," she muttered, "but, I mean, what was I supposed to say? I should have told him before the wedding. Now anything I say is just going to come out sounding like I tricked him into marrying me…which I did, of course."

"You're being too hard on yourself," Remus cut in. "You know as well as I do that you didn't trick him into anything. He asked you, remember?"

"Yeah but when he asked me to marry him he thought he was just asking Lily, not Lily plus one," she replied.

Remus reached over the counter and grasped Lily's hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"It's going to be fine," he told her. "In fact, I bet James will be thrilled."

"Thrilled?" Lily repeated skeptically. "He's only nineteen Remus, he's not ready for this. We're not ready for this."

"You will be," Remus said firmly.

"How do you know?" Lily asked.

"Because you're Lily," he answered, "and because James is crazy about you. You guys love each other and that's all it really takes. You'll figure it out together."

"What if he bolts?" she asked in a small voice, looking down at her hands.

"He won't," Remus assured her.

"I don't know, Remus," Lily told him, "I mean, I'm pregnant, and he's…"

She stopped abruptly at the look on Remus's face. He was looking just past her shoulder as though he'd just seen a ghost.

She felt a horrible sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach as she slowly turned around. Sure enough, James had just apparated into the house directly behind her.

And by the look on his face, he'd heard every word she'd just said.

& & &

"Wait a minute," Sirius said faintly, stopping Remus in the middle of his story. "Prongs is having a kid?"

"Well, Lily will probably do most of the 'having' part," Remus answered with a smile, glad he could finally tell Sirius the news he'd been holding onto for so long.

"But…this is…it's like, big, right? I mean, it is." Sirius continued. "It's the the first mini-marauder. It's the sprog of Prongs!"

"The sprog of Prongs?" Remus repeated dubiously.

"So what did he say?" Sirius asked after a moment.

"I don't know. I kind of ducked out of there," Remus admitted somewhat sheepishly. "You know, not really my place and all that."

Sirius furrowed his brows in thought.

"So you've known all this time?" he asked, the question coming out as more of a statement.

"Well, you know me and Lil…we tell each other pretty much everything…" Remus answered uncomfortably, wondering if this was going to turn into another fight.

But Sirius didn't say anything about Remus keeping it a secret, and for some reason this made Remus's stomach tighten into a knot. There was only one reason Remus had ever known Sirius to forgive secrecy, and that was out of guilt.

"So Prongs is having a kid," Sirius muttered to himself, shaking his head slightly. "I can't hardly wrap my mind around it."

After a moment he added quietly, "I bet he'll make a great dad, though."

Remus raised an eyebrow at that, surprised to see the soft smile that grazed Sirius's lips.

"You're happy about this?" he asked, his voice coming out a bit more suspicious than he'd intended.

"Well, they're awfully young," Sirius replied slowly, "but I don't know…going to their wedding, and all that stuff you said before…" – he trailed off, blushing for some reason – "It just…I don't know. Kids have such innocence. It would be nice to remember what that's like."

"Yeah," Remus answered vaguely.

But as he thought the life this kid would have, growing up in the middle of a war, he wondered how long that innocence would last. After all, he had lost his at six years old, partially when he was mauled by a werewolf, and then fully the first full moon afterwards.

He looked at Sirius as he sat on the couch, staring off into space with that thoughtful expression that Remus could never manage to read. He longed to sit down next to him, to ask him softly when it was that he had lost his own innocence. In fact, he almost did so, but something stopped him.

He realized he didn't really want to know.

& & &

"I'm going to be a father," James announced for the eighteenth time. He had lost count of the number of firewhiskies he had consumed.

"Oh yeah?" Peter murmured indulgently, a collection of empty bottles strewn about in front of him as well.

"What am I going to do?" James asked.

"I don't know," Peter responded after a moment, when it appeared James really iwas/i asking his opinion. He still wasn't quite sure why he was there instead of Sirius.

"Have you talked to Sirius about this?" he finally ventured tentatively, wondering if there had been a row that he'd missed. With James and Lily gone on their honeymoon and Remus and Sirius off in their own little world, he hadn't seen much of anyone lately.

"He wouldn't understand," James informed him with a sigh. "Not exactly going to have this problem ever, is he?"

Peter thought about it for a minute and then nodded slightly; it made sense. James didn't think Sirius would understand the having kids thing, but that he might. He couldn't help the surge of triumph that suddenly bubbled up inside his chest at the thought.

"Right," he agreed, "no chance of getting Remus pregnant."

James snorted at that and Peter chuckled as well. He wondered briefly if this was what it felt like to be Sirius most of the time – to make James laugh, to have James turn to him over everyone else. He liked it.

"You know," he added, as a sudden idea hit him, "Remus has been acting rather off lately."

"Off?" James repeated, his eyebrows furrowing slightly. "What do you mean?"

"Ever since the kidnapping," Peter explained.

Encouraged by James's sudden look of thoughtfulness (and his heavy intoxication), Peter leaned in close and gave an over exaggerated glance around the bar.

"I just mean…well, a lot can happen in three weeks," he whispered conspiratorially.

James's eyes narrowed dangerously.

"What are you trying to say?" he demanded.

Peter faltered slightly.

"Um…I just meant…well, there's no way we can know for sure what happened, can we?" he asked, quickly losing confidence under James's glare. "I mean…don't get me wrong, I don't want to believe it either, but, well, you have to be careful is all. Especially now, with the baby."

James's expression softened and he grasped Peter by the shoulder in a rare show of affection for the smaller boy.

"Look, I appreciate what you're trying to say, but you weren't there, mate," he told Peter softly. "You didn't see him. I mean, he was clutching a sliver letter opener for God's sake!"

Peter looked stricken at this revelation. He leaned back in his seat and rubbed his forehead with the palm of his hand as though he had a massive headache.

"I'm sorry," he said, after a moment. "It was just the firewhiskey talking. You shouldn't listen to me."

"No, it's okay," James replied with a shrug. "You were right. We do have to be careful, especially now."

As Peter watched, James's eyes seemed to get a distant look in them as if James could suddenly see something he couldn't. Abruptly, James pulled out his wallet and placed a few sickles on the table.

"Tonight's on me, Pete," he offered at Peter's confused expression. "There's something I've got to go do."

& & &

James stood outside the door to the flat that Remus and Sirius shared and suddenly felt really awkward about what he was about to do. As he stood on the doorstep in momentary hesitation, it also occurred to him that he had never come into the flat through the front door before. In light of everything that had happened, Remus and Sirius had decided to have their floo cut off except for emergencies, and of course, all of their houses had been warded against apparation for months now.

James took a deep breath to let the awkwardness pass and to remind himself of why he was there and that it was actually a good thing, a happy thing, even – not at all depressing or awkward.

After a few minutes, he finally raised his fist and knocked sharply on the door.

"Who's there?" came Remus's voice from the other side.

"Prongs," James answered.

"What color did Lily turn your hair the time you gave her that handmade singing valentine in sixth year?" he asked the obligatory indentity verifying question, not even attempting to conceal the laughter in his voice.

"Periwinkle," James grumbled, cursing himself twice over for letting Sirius pick his question for him.

A second later the door swung open and he was met with Remus's smiling face. He ushered James inside and quickly shut the door behind him, replacing the charms it held.

"Hullo, Prongs," Remus said brightly, but James finally noticed that his smile didn't quite reach his eyes. "Tea?"

"Got anything stronger?" James asked, shruging off his coat and hanging on the rack by the door.

"Whoa, mate," Sirius exclaimed, joining them in the front hall. "Smells like you've already had your share of something stronger."

James shrugged.

"Yeah, I went out drinking with Pete."

He noticed a flicker of hurt pass across Sirius's face, but it was replaced instantly with a smile.

"Yeah, we uh…heard the news," he said, glancing uncertainly at Remus for a moment. "Congratulations."

When James merely grunted and sank down into the couch, Remus's earlier smile vanished.

"Look, James," he began uncertainly, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. It just really wasn't my place…"

James looked up at him in surprise.

"I'm not mad at you, Moony," he told him gently.

Remus relaxed visibly. He took one of the chairs across from James. Sirius followed suit.

"It's just the timing, you know?" James said after a moment. "Not just 'cause we just married and still young and all, but I mean, this war. You know?"

Sirius and Remus both nodded, unsure of what to say.

"Listen, the reason I came over here, is that I want to ask you guys something," James continued, his voice taking on the serious adult tone that had been growing more frequent as the war progressed. "I haven't talked to Lily about it yet, but I'm sure she'd agree. This war we're in, it's serious stuff. I don't know if we're all going to make it out of this."

Silence followed this proclamation as both Sirius and Remus shifted uncomfortably. Of course, they had both had similar thoughts about the war, but they were at a loss as to what James was getting at.

"What I'm saying is," James said finally, "is that if anything happens to me or Lily, I want you to look after my kid for me."

Sirius and Remus exchanged quick glance.

"What do you mean?" Sirius asked quietly.

"I mean, I want you two to be the godparents," James said solemnly. "If I can't be there to do it myself, I can't think of anyone else I would trust to do something this important."

"Nothing's going to happen to you," Sirius replied sharply at the same time Remus said ruefully, "Sorry, James, I can't."

"Why not?" James demanded, focusing on Remus.

Remus blushed slightly.

"Not allowed," he admitted.

"Says who?" James asked, his tone harsh. "The ministry? Fuck them. I want you to be my kid's godfather, Remus, official or not."

At this, Remus's blush deepened.

"Thanks, James," he muttered.

"Okay, personally, I think Remus would make a great dad," Sirius interjected, glancing at Remus affectionately before turning back to James. "But me? Come on James, you know Lily won't have it."

"Of course she will," James insisted, dismissing his concerns with a wave of the hand. "Besides, Moony and Padfoot come as a package deal these days."

Sirius continued to frown.

"You're not going to die, James," he said.

"I don't intend to," James shot back. "So, why don't you just say 'yes' already?"

Sirius looked over at Remus and James saw something pass between them that he couldn't identify.

"Of course we'll do it, you prat," Sirius told him with a grin.

All three boys leaned back in their chairs, the tension that had followed James inside suddenly disappearing. All at once they were just Moony, Padfoot, and Prongs, best friends and pranksters extraordinaire. James realized he hadn't felt this comfortable just hanging out with Remus and Sirius since they had left school.

"So, tell us Prongs, how did this happen, exactly?" Sirius asked, quirking an eyebrow.

James merely blushed and chucked a throw pillow at him.

"Well Sirius," Remus supplied, "when a bespeckled marauder and a fiery red head love each other very much…"

The explanation was cut off abruptly as they all burst into laughter.

For the first time since leaving Hogwarts, they stayed together the entire night, just talking. All three were amazed at how much there was to say.

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And that's it for chapter five! Please review. Reviews are love.

Next chapter… during what should have been a happy time for them, the Potter's receive some disturbing news.