"Where's Addison?" Meredith asked of Derek, a few days later.

"I'm not sure. Why?"

"She saved me. I'd like to thank her."

"I'll try to find her. Is there anything you need?"

"Will you bring me back some cookies?"

"Sure. What kind?"

"Peanut butter."

Derek hadn't gotten very far down the hall, when there was a knock at Meredith's door. The knock was followed by the entrance of Prada heels carrying balloons and a delicious aroma. Meredith's mouth immediately began to water.

"Do I smell peanut butter?"

"You sure do. I thought I'd bring you some cookies now that you are keeping down solid food. I also brought you a teddy bear to keep you company while you're here."

"Addison, that's so nice, but why?"

"Because I know how you feel," Addison understood that Meredith was not asking about the cookies and balloons.

"You do?"

"I most certainly do, and it is not something you should be ashamed of. Almost everyone has the thought drift across their mind once."

"How did you know?"

"I saw the familiar symptoms, but I didn't want to pry. I figured, out of everyone at this hospital, it would be least likely that you would confide in me."

Meredith saw a momentary lapse in the self-confidence Addison always wore as her uniform. It was then that she understood. Addison wanted her to be happy because she knew how it felt to be miserable. It surprised Meredith to see this side of Addison.

"Thank-you, for saving me. And for being honest. I wanted to talk, but I didn't know where to turn. Derek would have treated me like a china doll. I didn't want to put anything else on Izzie now that she's finally moving on, and Cristina isn't exactly the supportive here for you type. Can I have two persons?"

"I don't see why not."

"Cookie?" Meredith offered the bowl of homemade goodies Addison had just given her. "These are really good. I didn't know you could cook."

"Thanks, but I ate about ten before I brought them to you. I'm a pretty decent chef, but I don't see the point in cooking for one person."

"Would you maybe cook for me sometime?"

"Sure. Almost anything you want. When do you get out of here?"

"As long as my temp is normal, I should be able to go home by the day after tomorrow."

"I may have a surprise for you…" Addison smiled at Meredith, who had since devoured half the cookies. "But you're going to be sick and not able to eat it if you keep that up."

"Oh, right," Meredith grinned sheepishly after noticing the now half empty bowl. "I need some milk."

"I'll get you some."

"No, page Derek. You've been nice enough to me already."

Barely a minute after Addison had paged him, Derek appeared in Meredith's doorway, breathless and red faced. He immediately ran over to her and began checking her stats. Meredith glanced at Addison with an "I told you so" look.

"What's wrong? I was paged 911."

"I need some milk."

"That's what…you asked someone to page me for milk?"

"Now, Derek," Addison began in the tone she had that often made Derek so mad he couldn't stand it, "She's been through a lot. If she wants some milk, you better damn well get it for her."

"Who made you boss?"

"Me!" Meredith piped up. "And I still need some milk."

"Okay. Do you need anything else?"

"Mmm. Nope. Just milk, please."

He exited the room, obviously annoyed that the 911 page had been about milk. On the way down the hall, he realized that he probably should have been keeping closer tabs on Meredith anyway. He still didn't know what to think about the whole situation.

She can swim. Why didn't she? Maybe I should spoil her for a while…

"I have to get back to work, but if you need to talk, let me know."

"Thanks, Dr. Mon…Addison. We'll talk after I get out of here."

"I'll be waiting with something yummy."

"Sounds great."

Just as Addison was leaving the room, Derek came back with milk. He was holding several cartons, and Meredith couldn't help but laugh.

"What's with all the cartons?"

"I wasn't sure if you wanted skim, whole, 2, or chocolate, so I brought one of each."

"Thanks," she giggled, "I think I'll have chocolate then 2 and whole. You can have the skim. It's like drinking cow sweat."

"I smell peanut butter."

"Addison brought cookies."

"Peanut butter cookies?" he asked warily.

"Yeah."

"Are they homemade?" now he looked almost scared.

"Yeah. Why? Does she put cyanide in them or something?"

"No. They're just really good. I've lost count on how many times I've seen those cookies in reverse because we'd both eat a couple dozen."

"Yeah, she mentioned that."

"What else did you two talk about?"

"She invited me over for dinner."

"Are you going to go?"

"Of course. She's nice, Derek. Painfully nice."

"Am I invited?"

"No."

"Now, why does that seem awkward?"

"It's not. I'll go and have Italian food and wine, and we'll hang out. No big deal."

"Right. Listen, I just got a surgery. One of the ferry boat victims needs a craniotomy. Do you want me to have Cristina or someone come sit with you?"

"I don't need a baby-sitter, Derek. I'll be fine unless I eat more of these cookies. Then I might have to puke."

"How about Izzie?"

"Derek! I'll be fine. Have a cookie and some milk and go do the surgery."

"It's just that it's a really long procedure and…"

"GO!" she pushed him off the bed. "And thanks for the milk."

Having finally found some peace and quiet, Meredith took the chance to open the card, perfectly written in Addison's beautiful, swirling handwriting, that had been attached to the balloons. She read the card and tears came to her eyes. For so long, she had thought of Addison as Satan. She even wished she'd disappear, but when Meredith almost disappeared, Addison had stepped up and saved her life. Now Addison was offering to help her deal with everything that was ahead. She read the card again.

Meredith, I know I'm probably the last person you would ever think of to talk to, or even be friends with, but I'm here for you. I understand what you are going through more than you will ever know. Everyone feels a little depressed sometimes. Some of us even consider ending it all, but there are things in this world worth living for. I know you're having a hard time seeing those things right now, and that is perfectly okay, but they are there. Eventually you will see them, so don't give up. I don't know what those things are for you, but I know what saved me. When you begin to wonder where you went wrong and how you got to this point, turn to me. I don't want to lose you. I want to be your friend. -Addie