VI

Diary Entry – Lucy Westenra20 September

Yesterday was such a wonderful day, why did it have to end? Maybe I did drink a little bit, but, ugh, I can't even write this without getting flustered. Arthur, I swear I didn't fool around with anybody! Why won't you believe me?

I can't stand this. I've never seen him so mad. And I have the worst hangover today, so that's really not helping. It just hurts to have him accuse me of being unfaithful.

I didn't go to class today. I guess I really did drink more than I thought, but I don't remember being that out of it last night. But I've never had it this bad. I stand up and I'm dizzy, though fortunately I've been able to keep what little I have an appetite for down. I was sitting on the couch in the den drinking my water, and Arthur came to sit with me. We were cuddling, and all the sudden he pulled back, his face bright red, and called me a slut! Maybe it is inappropriate for me to be living with my fiancée, but in all honesty he's the only one I ever have and ever will be with. I love him with everything that I am, and that hurt me like nothing else anyone has ever said to me...

He won't even speak to me now. I don't know what I did. I haven't got the foggiest idea.

Arthur, whatever I did, whatever it was I'm sorry. Please, stop looking at me like this...

Diary Entry – Dr. Seward20 September (Voice Recording)

It's not even lunch time and it's already been an overly eventful day. Not only has my back decided it doesn't like the way I sit, stand, walk, or sleep, there's been an outburst of violence among the patients here. It feels almost like there's an anticipation for something. I'm watching it, but not a part of it. But they are, they can feel it. It's like they know something is coming, and in an effort to cope with the increased anxiety, a large percentage of the patients are resorting to violence, towards each other and the staff.

I have no way to explain it, not even mystically as Abraham would. The moon's already past full.

Renfield's sure making the best of the chaos. He's become a sort of leader for the patients. He has always had a strange position when it comes to interpersonal relationships. He holds himself higher than everybody here. I believe the only one he sees as an equal is myself (a reason for this being that I am the one in charge of his well-being and in truth his whole life while he is a resident here). But there is no one here he holds above himself. It is to be expected that, in response to one who carries himself rather arrogantly, the other patients would adopt a sort of awed respect for him. In the past this has been understated, almost unconscious and invisible but to a careful observer. Now, however, it is quite clear to all.

For example: during the day there are hours partitioned for the patients to enjoy leisure time as they will. The transitions from this time to, say, quiet time, activities, meals, lights-out, etcetera, is generally when we observe the most anxiety and aggressive behaviour. Very rarely do we have issues with patients attacking staff during leisure time. Occasionally there will be a patient to patient dispute over a poker game or the like, and if it is not caught and settled in time things can and do escalate to violence. There has only been one such occurrence here, however, in the last thirteen months, before today that is.

Today there were three fist fights, for none of which when investigated could be found an apparent cause or motivation. Patient to staff during leisure time was one, and during transitions between one and four patients were physically or verbally aggressive toward their staff. I've already had to file five incident reports on two cups of coffee. I'm exhausted, and now Arthur has called and asked to meet me for lunch. He sounded rather upset on the phone, and I can't turn down a friend in need.

It's not that I dislike the work I do here. It's actually very rewarding and fascinating, but days like today make me question my sanity with regards to my career choice.

(Later)

Really, I think if this case should get any more confusing I don't know what I will do. I was just about to leave the ward for my lunch with Arthur, just before 12 p.m., when I heard a large commotion coming from the common room. When I investigated I expected to see the widower, Mr. Jenkins, as the cause of the commotion, being that it is the anniversary of his wife's death only a year past. I was rather surprised, however, to find our normally quiet and self-composed Mr. Renfield at the epicentre of the eruption. Fortunately the aides had come at a run, and so were able to restrain the patient from injuring himself or any of the others nearby in his outburst. The rest of the patients, those in their rooms and in the common room, grew even more anxious and upset as Renfield continued his cries, though I can't say I blame them. Being there and hearing him was unnerving for one in their right mind, which I like to imagine myself to be.

I tried to approach the patient, but it was taking three aides to hold him down, so I thought to wait it out. His upset lasted a good five minutes before, as the clocks chimed 12 noon, he let out a shrill scream and collapsed in the aides' arms. I thought, perhaps, he was unconscious, but his eyes were open and his lips moving. He was lead away into the quiet room where he still sits silently. The nurse checked him for any physical injuries and found none. Unfortunately, due to these events I had to cancel my meeting with Arthur. Renfield refused to eat lunch or dinner, and now he sits quietly catching flies. I could get nothing out of him until after the sun went down, and then only short phrases such as 'it's over,' and 'he's abandoned me.'

I wonder if, perhaps how it is said the moon can affect the fluids in a body much like the tides of the waters, the sun may also have an influence on the mind. I sound like Abraham.

Diary Entry – Arthur Holmwood20 September

I don't know if it is right to assume things, but in every way I feel betrayed. I tried to talk to John this afternoon. I need to talk to someone. I didn't drink last night, so I know I'm not forgetting anything that happened. I didn't want to drink, especially after I spoke with Mina. That, well, it didn't go as I had hoped, though I'm not really sure what I hoped for.

Lucy though, she had a few drinks. We walked home together, and I put her to bed before I went to my room. I don't really know when something would have happened, but the bruise on her neck... I'm not really sure what else to think. Did I not notice it coming home? Have I not been enough for her? What did I do to push her away like this?

She told me it was okay that we wait, but was it wrong of me to ask for that? People do things when they're drunk that they would never do otherwise. I, of all people, know that... Where are my friends when I need them?

Diary Entry – Abraham van Helsing20 September

I find it frustrating that people neglect so many small details. Details are important! They should know that, all of them. Details! The stuff we are made of. If I should fail to notice a heart beat, who is to say a body is not dead? Who trained these people? Certainly not I, I say! Details in research are essential. Essential beyond just mere importance.

These books, they are so vague. Imbecile monks, they're worse than my students. I do not mean vague in the sense of ambiguous riddles. By vague I mean to say they neglect to describe in any detail. 'This happened.' Yes, we know this happened. How did it happen? By my word, I say my freshmen write better reports!

The warrior prince died. No two reports agree on how. (See notes, 4 May) That castle has, by legend, had a rumoured Nosferatu in dwelling for centuries. I received by mail copies of deeds and such from my friend Arminius, poor copies I might say, hardly at all legible. The only transactions, at least recorded, for how well the wonderful Russia took record, in the last century in Transylvania region have been mere family land ownerships. Though it seems for a part of 1943 the Nazis bought up lands and then abandoned them.

The point worth making is that no one has had any recorded ownership of that castle since the Dracul reign ended in the 15th century. How comes it then a lawyer is summoned there to assist its owner in legal matters if there is no owner? I need more detail! Surely the man Renfield has some memory of the man or monster he met, though I could not condone forcing him to speak of it. Very frustrating indeed it is though, to find a lead and be unable to pursue it.

I meant to see Mina yesterday. Sadly, however, I did not remember until it was too late. When I arrived no one had seen her for some time. Lucy found her asleep upon inquiry. I did not want to wake her for my tardiness. The rest seemed to be enjoying themselves, which is good for students to do.