Chapter 25/Part 2 No Choice
The cruiser landed in a secure slip adjacent to the Justice Building and the prisoners, Melak, Terak, Kien and Devan were transferred without incident to the authorities there. The rest of Melak's followers were still on Corellia, awaiting extradition. The ship then traveled the relatively short distance to the Jedi Temple. As Obi-Wan had predicted, the families of the stolen younglings waited on the platform along with several Knights, among them healers and the remainder of the Jedi Council. Cody was the first to leave the ship, and only to escort the healers with a float back onboard. An impatient murmur began from the families wanting only to be reunited with their lost children. Yoda silenced them with the sharp rapping of his gaffer stick, "Patience, you must have; our injured Padawan we must see to first." He told them.
They seemed to resign themselves to this and quieted; but they did not have long to wait, less than a quarter of an hour later, the float carrying Ferri, covered with a blanket, one leg elevated by several pillows, emerged flanked by the healers. One of them holding a bag of fluid attached to the IV in Ferri's arm; another still securing the straps preventing the young Jedi from slipping off the float. Anakin Skywalker followed them, bowing to the Council as he approached, "I would like to settle my Padawan in the healers' quarters before we meet; if that would be acceptable." He said, allowing the float to continue on.
"Of course, Anakin; take as long as you wish." Mace replied.
"Thank you, Master Windu." Anakin answered, bowing once more before moving to catch up to the healers.
Padme and her two wayward sons appeared in the hatchway and headed down the ramp. Mace scowled disapprovingly at them both and shook his head, "I'm sorry, Master Windu; I guess they have a great deal of their father in them." Padme said.
"Yes; something that does not pleased their father either." Mace replied and then looked down once more at the two boys, "We will discuss your transgressions later."
Both Skywalker children looked down at the floor; Hadrian stifled a sob, "Yes, Master Windu." Luke murmured.
A cry of joy sounded from the crowd and Padme turned to see Obi-Wan leading the younglings down the ramp with Shel close behind them. The families moved closer, kneeling down with arms outstretched to embrace their younglings who moved to reunite with their families. Obi-Wan put a hand on Shel's shoulder, "You have done well; but your family is waiting." He told her.
Shel smiled up at him and then nodded before winding her way through to the loving arms of her parents. Just out of sight, Zak waited for his chance to slip quietly away. And as he heard his master greeting the waiting Council members, he saw that chance. Slipping out only far enough to jump off the side of the ramp, he moved away from the crowd, heading for the back corridors that would lead him to his quarters.
"Isolate himself he must not, Obi-Wan." Yoda stated, frowning as he observed the young man's retreat.
"He knows that, Master Yoda; but he has had little sleep these past few days, and he is very close to breaking down completely. He confessed to me that he feels as if he is falling apart." Obi-Wan replied, "I believe he would rather that not happen in the presence of a crowd."
"Pride is not an admirable quality in a Jedi Knight, Master Kenobi." Plo Koon commented.
"With all due respect, Master Koon; I do not believe this is a matter of pride." Obi-Wan replied, "It is more a matter of holding onto one's dignity; and I do not believe I can fault him for that."
"Nor can I; however, he must not allow this to prevent him from seeking help." Mace interjected.
"I do not believe he wishes it to." Obi-Wan assured the senior master, "He has already agreed to meet with our mind healer."
"I am glad to hear that." Mace answered, "He is a fine Jedi; and he certainly has done nothing to warrant what he was subjected to. The resources of the Temple are at your disposal, Obi-Wan; you know that."
"Yes, thank you, Master Windu." Obi-Wan replied, "And now, if you will excuse me, I should check on him."
"Excused you are; in need of his master your Padawan is." Yoda told him.
"Master Kenobi, the ceremony is later this afternoon; as a Council Master, you are required to attend." Eeth Koth reminded him.
"Yes, I understand my duty, Master Koth." Obi-Wan replied as he bowed and turned to leave.
"Master Kenobi, have you told Zak that Khyber was killed during the invasion?" Luminara Unduli asked.
Obi-Wan sighed and shook his head, "No; and Ferri does not know either. There did not seem to be a good time to tell them." He answered.
"That is not wise, Master Kenobi; they should hear this from their masters, not from someone else." Ki Adi Mundi advised.
"Yes, I know. I will speak with Zak when I see him; and I am sure Anakin will tell Ferri once he is settled." Obi-Wan said, "Now, if you will excuse me; I would like to see to my Padawan."
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In stark contrast to the joyous reunion taking place in the landing bay, final preparations were being made for the spiritual release of the two fallen Jedi. Khyber Raneau's parents, along with a younger brother had already come to say goodbye in private to their older son before he and the youngling master were moved from the healers' quarters to the larger chamber that had been chosen for the funeral rite. No one would be excluded from the solemn ceremony; the Padawan had many friends, and many Knights, Padawans and Initiates had been younglings under Master Horan's care. The families of the abducted younglings would join Khyber's; Chancellor Organa and his family, including the ex-bounty hunter, Boba Fett, would also be in attendance.
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As the door to his quarters slid shut, Zak leaned against it in weary relief; he had not wanted to meet anyone, and the Force had granted him a boon. After a moment, he moved into the room, hung his weapon and utility belt on their respective hooks and sank onto the bed. The familiarity of his quarters helped to calm his frayed nerves; he lay down cross-ways on the bed with his feet on the floor and closed his eyes. For a few minutes, he lay there, letting the feeling of security wash over him. He felt worn and beaten; just thinking had become painful and difficult. All his training, all the mental exercises he had learned and practiced had not prepared him for the assault he had experienced on Bella; now, all that training lay in the shattered ruins of his mental shields. And without them, he was vulnerable and defenseless; not a good position for a Jedi.
Had it been only two days since the assault? When the only thing he and Ferri had to worry about was how long it would be before there next mission. Before the peace of the Temple was shattered; before they were summoned to the youngling dormitories only to find Master Horan lying in a pool of her own blood and witness the execution of Galyn Mora. Before Ferri had been shot and he had been forced to make the decision that had brought about their two day ordeal. Zak covered his eyes with his arm; he wondered if the cremation ceremony had taken place yet. He had been nurtured by Master Horan; and Galyn had always been fair-minded and empathetic when dealing with the younger Jedi in her charge. Zak decided, if he had not missed the ceremony, that he wanted to attend. In which case, he would have to look presentable. He could not appear in his present state, with his tunic torn and soiled; not to mention the fact that he had not showered in the two days they had been held captive. Sitting up with groan, he removed his boots, "What a mess." He said aloud as he realized how scuffed and dirty they were.
Shaking his head, he decided they would have to be polished before he could even think of wearing them. When he had begun his third year as Obi-Wan's apprentice, not long before his fifteenth birth day, he had moved from the Initiate/Junior Padawan wing to the Senior Padawan wing; the quarters here were only slightly larger, but the private areas contained their own showers; a convenience that he was now exceedingly grateful for. Shedding what was left of his tunics, he slipped into the private area and slid the door closed behind him.
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Not surprisingly, Zak's door was closed when Obi-Wan arrived, "Zak?" He called, rapping lightly on the door, "Padawan? I just want to know how you are doing?"
When there was no answer, Obi-Wan reached out and felt the presence of his apprentice, "I know you're in there, Zak." He stated, rapping once more.
He was answered with silence, and he sighed and shook his head, "This won't due, Padawan; you must not shut yourself off." He said.
Still, there was no response, so he triggered the door himself and peered in. The room appeared to be empty, but the door to the private area was closed and Obi-Wan could hear water running. Zak's boots sat neatly next to his bed, his lightsaber and utility belt hung from their proper hooks, his outer tunics lay crumpled on the floor; the only item that appeared out of place. It came as somewhat of a relief that he had not found Zak huddled in a corner or lying curled into a fetal position on his bed; he had not answered because he was showering and had not heard him. The very act of showering gave Obi-Wan the impression that the young man still had some wits about him; a huge feat considering what he had been through. What Obi-Wan feared most was how Zak would take the news of Khyber's death in his current condition. However, he realized Ki Adi Mundi had been right; he must be the one to break the news to him. Resigning himself to this difficult task, Obi-Wan picked Zak's tunics up from the floor and sat down to wait.
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"Have they released Galyn and Master Horan to the Force yet, Master?" Ferri asked as one of the healers raised the sling holding his wounded leg.
"Galyn is not dead, Ferri." Anakin told him.
"Oh...she was shot just as Zak and I arrived at the dormitory; we both thought she died." Ferri replied and then smiled a little, "I like Galyn; I'm glad she's going to be alright...she is, isn't she?"
"Yes, she was fortunate." Anakin answered and then looked down at the floor.
"I am sorry about Master Horan, though; she nurtured me." Ferri said, "Has she been released to the Force yet?"
"Not until this afternoon; we had to wait." Anakin informed him.
"Wait? For us to be found?" Ferri guessed.
"No." Anakin replied and then sighed, "Someone else was killed after you and Zak were knocked out."
"It was one of the younglings, wasn't it; that's why you had to wait, for the family." Ferri surmised, "Which one was it?"
"It wasn't a youngling, Ferri; it was...it was one of the senior Padawans." Anakin corrected.
"Force." Ferri gasped, "Who?"
"Khyber Raneau." Anakin revealed.
"Oh no." Ferri whispered as he felt his heart constrict.
"I'm sorry, Padawan."
"How did he die?" Ferri asked, his voice hoarse with emotion.
"He must have sensed the distress and went to the dormitory to find out what was causing it. We found him in right inside the door." Anakin explained.
Ferri shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut, "We should never have put out weapons down." He stated, "This is going to kill Zak."
"Ferri, Khyber made a mistake when he entered that dormitory; his weapon was still clipped to his belt." Anakin told him, "He got himself killed; as far as surrendering, you were left with no choice. We know the extremists were threatening to kill younglings if you didn't."
"All the same; Zak will blame himself. He still thinks my getting shot was his fault." Ferri countered and then looked up at Anakin, "I'd like to go this afternoon; Khyber was my friend."
Anakin nodded, "I'll see what I can do." He replied.
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Zak untied the tether binding his Padawan braid and then unwove it; removing the beads and unwinding the ribbons wound into it, placing them carefully in a tray on the edge of the sink. He reached back to remove the band holding his ponytail in place, but it was missing. Shaking his head, he wondered why had not noticed it before as he stripped down completely and stepped into the shower stall; immediately, the water began to cascade from several jets, "Warmer." He commanded, quickly feeling the water's temperature rise. Closing his eyes, he let the water saturate his hair and run down his face, "Warmer." He repeated, still not satisfied with the temperature.
He stood there, with the hot water washing over him, feeling it ease the stiffness and tension from his muscles; it felt so good just be wet. After several minutes he wiped the water from his face and retrieved the bottle of soap from its niche, removed the brush from its hook and scrubbed himself clean; then he poured some of the soap on his head to wash his hair. When he was satisfied that he was clean enough, he rinsed all the soap off and then stood several more minutes in the hot spray before stepping out of the stall. He toweled off quickly, picked up his discarded breeches from the floor and put them in the laundry bin. Sensing his master in the outer room, he wrapped a dry towel around his waist and triggered the door.
"Feeling better?" Obi-Wan asked as Zak stepped into the outer room.
"A little." Zak replied, moving to the bank of drawers along one wall.
"Master Windu is concerned that you will isolate yourself from help." Obi-Wan said.
"I won't." Zak answered as he retrieved a set of underclothing and boot liners from one drawer and a clean tunic and breeches from another.
"He will be relieved to hear it." Obi-Wan replied.
Zak retreated to the private area to dress, "I've decided to go to the ceremony for the release of Galyn and Master Horan into the Force, if it hasn't been held yet." He called out.
"Galyn did not die, Padawan." Obi-Wan informed him.
There was a moment of silence, "Well, at least there is one good thing to come of all this." Zak finally replied, "What about Master Horan?"
"Yes." Obi-Wan answered.
"I'm sorry; she nurtured me." Zak said.
"She nurtured many of us; she will be missed." Obi-Wan told him.
Zak returned to the outer room with the tray of braiding materials in his hand, "Have they released her into the Force yet?" He asked.
Obi-Wan sighed, "No; in fact, it will be this afternoon." He answered.
"I'm surprised they waited so long." Zak observed.
"Master Horan was not the only one who died that night, Zak." Obi-Wan said.
Zak shook his head, the tray of beads slipped from his fingers and landed on the floor, scattering the beads, "No; no; no...I gave up my weapon...and I...I made Ferri give up his and they killed them anyway...it's my fault."
"Zak, it was not the younglings." Obi-Wan replied and then sighed again, "It was Khyber."
"What?" Zak exclaimed.
"It happened after you and Ferri were stunned; we found him lying just inside the dormitory." Obi-Wan told him.
"It was my fault." Zak whispered.
"No, Padawan." Obi-Wan countered, rising quickly to wrap his arms around his apprentice as he sank to the floor.
"Yes, it is." Zak replied, "I surrendered my weapon; it was my fault..."
"Stop it, Zak." Obi-Wan ordered lowering himself and his apprentice to the floor, "Listen to me."
"My fault; all my fault..." Zak mumbled as he curled into a ball.
"It was not your fault. Khyber never drew his weapon, Zak; he entered that room unarmed and alone. He should have known better." Obi-Wan told him, "Do you understand? It was not your fault."
"He wouldn't have...have been alone if we hadn't been stunned...and that wouldn't have...wouldn't have happened if I hadn't..." Zak continued to ramble, his whole body trembling.
"And if you had not, then they would have killed younglings until you did. Don't you see, Padawan; they left you no choice." Obi-Wan insisted as he gathered the young man into his arms, "You had no choice."
"No choice." Zak repeated.
"That's right; you saved the younglings by surrendering. You had no choice." Obi-Wan said.
"I had no choice." Zak echoed softly.
Obi-Wan felt Zak relax, and the trembling subsided, "I had no choice." Zak said again, stronger this time.
"None." Obi-Wan confirmed.
"No choice." Zak said one last time and pushed away from his master, gathering up his scattered beads and ribbons.
With Obi-Wan's help, Zak managed to find them all, "I'm sorry, Master; I don't know what has happened to my control."
"There is nothing to be sorry for, Zak; you have more control than anyone has a right to after yesterday." Obi-Wan replied, "However, I do not believe you are up to this ceremony."
Zak pulled himself up, "I need to go. Khyber was my friend; and part of what I am comes from Master Horan's nurturing. I owe it to both of them to be there." He stated as he ran his fingers through the still-damp strands of braid hair.
Obi-Wan sighed and nodded, "I believe I understand; but I thought you were not up to meeting the other Jedi." He replied.
"I'm not; but sometimes we have to make sacrifices in order to do the right thing." Zak answered as he separated his hair into three sections.
Obi-Wan had to smile as he listened to his own words repeated back to him, "Well-said, Padawan. Here, let me."
Zak nodded, allowing Obi-Wan to weave the braid; he had managed to find another binder for his ponytail and gathered the short hair back, looping the binder twice to make it tight, "Why didn't you tell me I'd lost this, Master?" He asked.
"The loss of a hair binder did not seem nearly as important as the loss of your mind, Padawan." Obi-Wan answered.
"I suppose not." Zak concurred, "I'll need to polish my boots."
"There will be time for that; and I will help you." Obi-Wan offered.
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As the time for the ceremony drew closer, those wishing to attend began to gather in the chamber where it would take place. The Chancellor and his family arrived and took their place with the Council who had already assembled. Anakin had managed to wangle a temporary release from Declan with the promise that Ferri would return to healers' quarters as soon as the ceremony had concluded; and so he sat with his leg elevated next to his master, the only one not required to stand. Zak stood nearby with his own master, feeling increasingly uncomfortable as the crowd grew larger. Two empty pyres stood on a platform in the center of the room; then the crowd parted to allow the bearers of two slabs carrying the bodies of the youngling master and the Padawan of Goral Ansular. The bearers placed their burdens carefully on the pyres and stepped away and then Master Windu stepped forward, "Master Ansular, please step forward." He commanded.
Again the crowd parted, and Goral Ansular stepped up to stand before the Council Master, "At this time, the Council would like to recognize the bravery your Padawan displayed in facing the threat to our younglings." Mace announced as he produced a pair of sheers, "It is the decision of the Jedi High Council that this Padawan, Khyber Raneau, be elevated posthumously to the rank of Jedi Knight."
Goral bowed and took the sheers that Mace now extended to him, "I am honored, Master Windu." He replied and then moved to the slab where the young man lay, "As your master..." He hesitated, fighting his emotions, "As your master, it is my...my privilege...to...sever..." He stopped again, Force give me strength, "To sever the symbol of your current rank. In doing so...in doing so, I am...I am releasing you to perform...to perform your duties...as a Jedi Knight. May...may the Force...be with you." He finally managed to finish, taking the braid in one hand and snipping it just behind the ear.
Once the braid was removed, he tied the loose end with a short thong and then turned to where Khyber's family was standing with the Council, "It is my great sorrow that I failed to protect my apprentice as part of the oath I took when I chose him. I can only offer this, in hopes that you will know the Jedi who was your son." He told them, and then handed the braid to Mace who stepped off the platform to present the token to Khyber's mother. Weeping, she took the braid, clutching it to her chest as her husband comforted her.
Yoda then stepped up onto the platform, "Too soon we have lost this boy. But the will of Force we do not always understand, tragedy we cannot always prevent. Sacrifice is the way of the Jedi, and young Khyber's death, a symbol of that sacrifice is. Remember this, his parents must that bring some comfort them it may. Lost too, we have, Master Horan; dedicated she was to raising our younglings with love and compassion. Proven how great her dedication was she has, in giving her life. Loved she was and missed greatly, she shall be. And so, return these two Jedi to the Force we must." He said and then nodded to Goral before rejoining the Council.
With a great sigh, Goral powered up his weapon and lit the pyres, first that of the youngling master and then his padawan's and stepped back as the fires began to grow. Lady Raneau began to sob, her shoulders shaking with grief in her husband's arms as the flames began to consume the body of her son. Standing next to Obi-Wan, Zak's vision blurred with unshed tears as he watched the flames; Obi-Wan put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed.
The mourners remained, silently watching, until the fires died down, leaving nothing more than a few ashes; and then began to disperse. The Chancellor turned to the Ranueas to offer his sympathy for the loss of their son. Several Knights approached to speak with Obi-Wan, and he turned his attention to them as Zak moved toward the Council's private corridor intent on returning to his quarters; but a hand gripped his arm, spinning him around, "This is your fault." Goral Ansular stated accusingly.
"What? I...I..." Zak stammered trying to pull away.
Goral maintained his grip, clamping down almost painfully, "You coward, I heard what you did." He continued.
"What are you doing Ansular?" Shaak Ti demanded, "Release him."
"My Padawan is dead because of him." Goral retorted.
"Calm down, Goral; you know that is not true." Mace corrected, "Let him go."
"Dead, you coward; because of you." Goral continued.
Zak could sense the raw emotion emanating from the grieving master; it brushed against his injured mind painfully and he pulled away, putting his hands to his head as the pain increased. Goral's voice began to fade, he could see Goral talking, but he could no longer hear him; he staggered back, wanting only to get away from Goral's muted accusations. But his legs did not seem to want to hold him up and he crumpled to his knees; he looked up to see his master looking down in concern. He blinked as his vision blurred and then began to fade completely as the floor rushed up to smack him in the face.
Obi-Wan knelt down next to his stricken apprentice and gently eased him onto his back; Zak's eyes were open, staring blankly at the ceiling above them, "Zak?" He whispered.
When he received no response, he looked up at the rest of the Council who were now gathered around them, "What have you done, Goral?" Eeth Koth demanded.