A/N This whole story is a repost b/c I got behind in updating. Now I've got new chapters and decided to repost. Please enjoy.

Warnings 1+2 Shounen ai. Slight 1+3

Declaimer I am money-less, so you can't sue me, besides, I don't own Gundam Wing or any of its characters.

Thanks toEveryone!

Side Notes /Lyrics/, (#) Explanation at bottom, ---blahblahblah--- Flashback

Seemingly Lost Wish You Were Here, continued…

By: Lemony Sickness

Lyrics by: Incubus – Nowhere Fast

You know what is funny? I'm lost and confused, but I'm not quite sure that I mind.

/Will I ever get to where I'm going?

Will I ever follow through with what I had planned./

I've been lodging at the Preventor Headquarters' for a week, and no mission has been assigned, nor disturbance needed to de dealt with. There are only the problems that I am causing for myself. Few events had taken place upon my arrival, but the events that have occurred were significant.

Of course, upon arriving in the secluded area I was greeted by Sally Poe. She had me logged into security and told me that I was to be lodging here and I was to have a roommate.

---I followed Sally down one of the many halls on the ground floor, surveying everything we passed. It always comforted me to know my surroundings; made me gain some control over the events taking place in my life. We stopped in front of a plain white door at the end of the hall with a gold plate, 'Rm. 10' carved elegantly into it. I also noticed that not only this door, but all the doors in this hall had peep halls.

She opened the door and I took in my new sleeping arrangements. There were two beds directly inside the door on either side with old cedar trunks at the end. There was only one desk, which was positioned center of the back wall; no windows. There was only one other door, and as I glanced that way I noticed that that said door was opening to reveal white and blue checkered linoleum floor tiles, and a set of black combat boots…

"Yuy."

"Wufei."---

As startled as I was at seeing my Chinese comrade, I somehow felt randomly content with the pairing. I admired Wufei, he was a strong soldier, and tended to stay out of my way and didn't mind long silences; they couldn't have chosen me a more suitable partner.

"You're losing your touch."

I tense, realizing I heard the approach of no one. Wufei looked down at me, and I squinted back up at him. Glaring wasn't an option when the person you were trying to do so at is standing directly in the sun.

"Either that, or you are eating less."

The Asian smiled slightly before sitting down beside me on the bench, "I do believe that you just insinuated that I use to be fat?"

"Hn," was my only reply and I smirked lightly; Wufei arched his brow elegantly, then brushed me off.

I never really knew Wufei all that well, but as more time passed between us, I found I rather liked his presence and demeanor; he put me at ease. Studying Wufei, I found him to be wearing his usual: black combat boots, with black baggy pants, and a white t-shirt. His body was muscular, just a little thicker than mine, but when we stood up, I was a head taller than him. When my gaze rested on his face I found his onyx orbs gazing at me in confusion.

Standing up, I smirk and as I walk away I call over my shoulder, "Don't worry, you're definitely not fat." I never noticed the pinkish tinge that appeared on Wufei's pale cheeks.

I enter our room and walk to the small adjoining bathroom. Splashing water onto my face, I watch in the mirror as crystalline droplets race each other to the edge of my chin, and drip off the edge of my nose. While memorizing my room mate's body, I found myself comparing him to Duo, why?

'Duo,' I hadn't really thought about him as much as I use to. One of my plans when accepting to join the Preventors was to use their resources to get in contact with the braided boy. And when I think about it, I've no reason as to why I haven't been trying.

/I guess it's possible that I have been a bit distracted

And the directions for me are a lot less in demand./

Me, Heero Yuy, distracted? With the way things have changed… With the way I have changed, that is a possibility. I don't know anymore. My stay at the Preventors hasn't really been all that busy, but thoughts of finding and confessing my infatuation to him have seemed less important.

Quickly I walk to my trunk and prop it open on the end board of my bed. Like everything else in the room, the contents of my trunk were organized. In a little slit, that I cut of my own accord, in the cloth lining the inside of my trunk was the picture of Duo with his arm thrown casually around my neck. Just seeing the picture set my resolve a little higher; I needed to see him in person. It wasn't less important to find him; that is just my excuse. When actually… It seems to be that I am just afraid.

/Will I ever get to where I'm going?

If I do, will I know when I am there?/

I can't help but have high hopes; my imagination has run wild with possible scenarios of our reunion. Would or could Duo even return my feelings? Does he even look my way, or is he "girls only". From what I have read, homosexuality is common, but looked down upon. So I am not completely in the wrong.

I know that I can't say that I am in love with Duo, because I've no clue as to what the feeling of love is or feels like. Is it something worth experiencing? How will I know?

/If the wind blew me in the right direction

Would I even care?/

The bedroom door opened, startling me. I need to stop thinking; it's going to get me killed. Quickly I stuff the picture back into its designated slot and close my trunk.

"I'm not interrupting something?"

"No, Wufei, just remembering."

I gaze at my new companion and close friend and still see his confusion. Have I changed that much? As if reading my mind,

"You've changed Heero," Wufei spoke softly.

"Is that a bad thing?" I state standing and peering into his eyes.

"…No."

Wufei averted his gaze, and silence reigned.

"But, you know what? You've changed too. …We all have."

Later, while lying in bed, I wonder just how much you've changed, and would you like the new me? Do I even want to find out the answer to this question?

/I would./

I would

/I take a look around; it's evident the scene has changed.

And there are times when I feel improved upon the past./

When I compare the past to the present, I realize the significant difference. Ever since I was little I was trained to be a soldier. Duo was an orphan, Wufei was apart of a family and clan, Trowa might not remember but he has Catherine's memories to lean on, and Quatre was born into a family and the heir to a fortune. Me? I was born into slavery. My first life lesson was: kill, or be killed. Before I was even in my teens I had handle a series of guns and already smelled the stench of death and decay. And they wondered why I was in such good control of my emotions and continued to try and keep them in check. The answer, is because life is not fair, and I simply got the short end of the stick.

But, when it comes down to it, I've become stronger through it all. And wasn't that the achievement that Doctor J was going for? And if Hell exists, may he rot in it.

/Then there are times when I can't seem to understand at all

And yes it seems as though I'm going nowhere…

Really fucking fast./

I am quite smart, but I don't have the answers to everything. As I lay here listening to Wufei's steady breathing and think of why I am here, I realize I am lost and have no idea of what course of action I should take.

'If he feels anything towards me, maybe he will come to me… If there was a God.'

Owari

Thanks for continuing to read! I am trying to update as fast as I can. I have actually had all the chapters up till this one written out and finished. Now I've got to start writing the rest. Don't worry though, I've got my plot and I know where I am heading, so it shouldn't take to long.