Jesus tap-dancing christ!!!! Guys, I am so sorry it's taken me this long to update anything for this story. My computer had a near fatal brain fart(...mmm, or hardrive fart in this case), it finally gets back in working order before I got bitch slapped by midterms. Brain goo, there's brain goo dripping from my ears! But fear not, my faithful readers! I've come back with two chapters in hopes of making up for the time between my last update and now. 18 is in the works and should turn out to be a doozy!! Don't pay too much attention to the spoiler on my profile, some of the stuff that was supposed to be in these two chapters were pushed back for 18 and 19; I'd like to have those up by the end of the month, we'll see. Anyway, my darling readers... CHAPTER 16!!!...

As Nadia made her slow return to consciousness, the first thing she noticed was the noise: speaking, wheels rolling, soft chatter, files and paper being played with and prodded at, distant beeping, and doors clicking, opening, closing, some swinging annoyingly. The next thing she knew was the feel of coarse yet cushy padding underneath her. But it wasn't until she made her first attempt at willing her rebellious eye lids to open that she knew, from the blinding and monstrously annoying bright lights, that she was in the hospital.

The hushed conversation from what she guessed to have been going on the other side of the room she was in stopped. A rough hand clasped onto her left hand from its resting place over her stomach, "Hey there… how're you holding up?"

Dean.

His words were soft and heavily concerned, paired with his touch the events of the past couple of hours came gushing into her head, swinging hammers against the walls of her skull. Lifting her head, a little bit too quickly, nausea and sheer panic made her sight blur and warp. Nadia let out a miserable groan as she felt Dean's other hand press lightly against her right shoulder, guiding her body back against the hospital bed; once there, it traveled down to her upper arm and rubbed at her appendage comfortingly, effectively calming her a bit… a bit. His hand had found its way from her arm to its most recent spot cupping her one side of her face as she tried opening her eyes a second time.

"I hate being mortal…" she grumbled, pinching the bridge of her nose with one hand, weakly grasping the hand on her face with the other; This light is pissing me off… why can't rock salt work on light bulbs like it does on ghosts?

The girl was half-way surprised when she heard the man sitting on the edge chortle at both of her complaints. Impatiently, she turned her head to block half the light, tackling the rest of the brightness with her left hand. The thump of her fingertips over white gauze not only caused a spark of worry, but produced a dull pain that made her headache and nausea worsen. "… Nngh, sonovabitch!"

"Careful there, hun… 16 stitches isn't something I'd want to agitate…" gently, he tugged at her fingers, moving them off of the blood splotch on the thick, itchy square of gauze. The mere contact from her fellow hunter shocked her with bolts of comfort and relaxation, and following that state of mind Nadia slowly curled herself into the fetal position, careful not to knee Dean in the back.

"Stitches…? What the hell for, man?" mentally rewinding the nights events, she had no idea why there would be any talk of stitches.

"Well, for one thing… you got the crap kicked outta ya by two demons, which, by the way, you handled them both nicely considering how banged up you were and the fact that there were two of them; I'm surprised you only needed 16. Secondly… that little demonic bitch busted your head open when she head butted you." Her eyes flicked left to right, searching for any remembrance of a demonic smack-down. Now, the head butting I remember… bitch's head was made of cinderblock… Again, Dean laughed.

"Tell me I got her back ten-fold?" in her mind, it was supposed to come out as a growl; but as the words spilled from her lips, they were whispered so quietly, even Dean had a hard time hearing it.

"Yea… shot her with the Colt… right in the sternum… you had the whole Matrix effect going on when you pulled the trigger on her, too." He recanted with a smile. Nadia's lips lifted uncomfortably into the tiniest of smirks, even that upset every bump, bruise… and the bastard facial gash, apparently.

Moaning, she slowly tucked her head closer to her chest, "Don't make me laugh, Dean… even trying not to throw up is painful… how long have I been out?"

"Uhhh… about two hours now, you sleep like a rock, I would have woken up and freaked out if there was a needle in my face while unconscious…" Don't laugh, don't laugh, don't…ha, ah fuck, I lose.

"Demon Hunting Poster-child, ladies and gentlemen…"

"Hey now, I can take a needle no problem… I'd just rather be alert when people are working on me…" the indignant murmur would have caused Nadia to burst out laughing, but she'd finally been able to school herself and remained still and quiet on the bed.

"So what's the damage report?"

"Not much… a few bumps, bruises and the occasional scrape… head-wound aside…"

"I meant on all of us, Dean." She said as she sighed out a yawn.

"Oh, well, that's how you're doin'… Sam's got lump on his head from when he hit the deck, hard to tell under that mop, though…" he half-heartedly left out the mass bruising on his own back from shoulder to the small of his back.

"… and Emmy… did—did she make it?" Dean's heart constricted painfully when he heard the return of the vulnerable, childlike tone. He felt the loath-worthy lump rise in his throat; he swallowed it back painfully, almost unsuccessfully as he carefully chose his next words.

"Yea… yea, she did; but—I'm not going to lie, Nadia —it doesn't look too good for her." the lithe body, curled inward, stiffened sharply in reply; watching her closely, he expected that she's either start crying or retching. One, he was able to handle… the other; however, he didn't want to be within a ten foot range of.

"How bad…" desperately, she bit back the tears and sobs between clenched teeth, causing her to sound a lot more cold and impatient than she actually was.

"She's on Life Support…" why do their lives have to suck out loud like this? "Those bastards beat her within inches of her life… add in Cristin's damage… they're giving her a couple of days… at the most… God. I'm so sorry, Dia… I can't even imagine…" he lied, had it been Sam, he would have gone mad while still in the parking lot.

Placing her free hand, limply, on his forearm, Nadia managed to bring his words to a halt; inhaling sharply, with watery jewels trailing from her eyes, she thought: I know, Dean…

"We tried… we really did try hard…"

Yea… we did, we did our best… stopping for a beat, she whimpered; a silent cry for consolation as she braved the pain and tightly shut her eyes, only opening them after she felt Dean's cool forehead rest lightly against her own. Can I go see her…? I don't want her to be alone and scared…

The brief wink that answered her before the light-block moved away from the bed allowed partial relief to the panic still swimming about in Nadia's head. When he returned with the wheel chair, he gingerly scooped her up from the bed, and was slightly caught off guard by the tight hug she ambushed him with. But he didn't tense nor pull away, instead he returned the gesture, allowing her to melt against him in the obvious relief Dean's presence served his fellow huntress.

Once situated and through the door, the two made the seemingly endless trek to Emily's room two floors up; the halls were large, stark and grievously ominous. Both hunters felt heavy with the apprehension of seeing the younger girl, lost in their own worlds as they rolled/walked over square after square of the tacky, plastic tile with its dirty appearance of off white with ash grey streaks. Nadia had little patience for hospitals, and knew that Dean most certainly hated them; as the distance between herself and her sister slowly shrank, her vague memories of this particular hospital haunted her, reducing her liking for hospitals to damn near non-existent.

Wariness flared in her chest when Dean finally rolled her up to Emily's door. She stared frighteningly at the entryway for a moment or two before gripping onto Dean's hand as he began to reach for the handle, "Wait… I'm—I don't think I'm ready to go in there just yet…"

"Want me to go in for a minute or two… til you're ready?" her eyes remained glued to the door the entire time, never leaving, her brown orbs full and spilling over in a residual terror. Jerkily, she nodded her reply. "Okay, just knock on the door when you want to come in."

Nadia waited until he disappeared behind the door, once again closed, before the whirlwind of emotions ravaging within her broke loose. Silently, she leaned forward, leaning her forehead against her wrists as her elbows sat on the armrests. She shook forcefully as she allowed every little feeling of guilt, anguish, hatred, and bitterness leave her within each tear; after a good 15 minutes she maneuvered herself as close to the door as possible, not caring whether or not anyone saw the drying streaks of tears drenching her face. One hand lay flat against the doorframe as the last of her troubled tremors left her.

Inside…

Dean closed the door carefully behind him after entering the room, when he turned to face Emily he was taken aback by the way the once energetic, mouthy young huntress seemed so fragile and pale. Her weary eyes opened at the sound of a chair being pulled close to her bedside, dazed and tired she looked at him, offering a smile, clearly false by the amount of fear evident in every inch of her expression. Dean returned the gesture with a deeply apologetic and brief grin, "Hey there, tiger… you look like you're about to go kill a bastard!"

"Ha, ha, Dean… I'm dying, not blind; I know I look like shit." The snarky remark was as blunt as usual, but from the frailty of its speaker and tone… the bite of the words were lost. "Wasn't exactly expecting a visit from you, though…"

Dean grasped his chest in overdramatic mock-hurt, gasping loudly; "What!? And why not?!"

"Well, I'm not the one you're in love with… for one, and I'm not the one teaching Sam to control his powers; I'm just her kid sister, nothing really special there."

"Got news for ya kiddo: that's bullshit; do you know how important younger siblings are in our line of business?" Emily tried with difficulty to laugh at the incredulous look on his face, "People like you and Sammy give people like your sister and me a purpose, a reason to get up in the morning. I don't think anybody knows just how lost Nadia will be when… I don't think she even knows…

"Sammy and me… we both care for the two of you, a lot. Not just because he needs help with his Shining deal that he's got going on, not just because I love your sister, and it's definitely not just because of the friggin' Colt… you guys are probably the most bad-ass girls I've ever met; I mean, I've been hunting my whole life… and I can still count all the huntresses I've ever met on one hand, none of them can top you guys." The way her eyes started to glitter as she smiled scared him… is she starting to go…? "Anyway… even if you lived to be a hundred… you'll never know how much you mean to us Winchesters… When you get there, wherever there is, can you do something for me, and for my brother?"

"Sure, what can I do?"

"Say hey to Jessica for Sammy, and hang out with our mom, Mary… let her know that her boys are venturing about with high quality women, 'Kay?" Emily smiled with some of her old vigor at the pseudo-stern look Dean was displaying, complete with waggling finger.

"I'm on it… is DiDi out there?"

"Yea, she said she needed a minute or two before she came in here. I'll go see if she's ready…" freezing suddenly inches from the door, he turned back to Emily with a grief stricken expression, "For as short a time it was, Emmy… I'm glad my brother and I got to know you." Returning to her side, he leaned in and kissed her forehead after brushing back a mocha colored curl; sniffling, she wrapped both arms around one of his, hugging it tightly.

"Thank you, Dean…" she sobbed, "for making life a little less lonely for us…"

I'm tearing those demon assholes limb from limb… this just isn't right…"No problem, little one, no problem." They remained in their embrace for a minute or two more before Dean heard the soft tapping at the door, pulling back he noticed that in her weakened state, Emily hadn't heard a thing aside from her machines and his quieted breathing.

Biting her lip, she nodded her 'thank you' with tearful eyes, watching as the hunter looked around himself before opening the door to help Nadia enter; as he disappeared on the other side, he dazzled her with his trademark smirk… one last time.

Now, Emily knew perfectly well that she was far from the image of perfect health, but when Nadia rolled in—coming to a stop only when she grimaced from her kneecaps colliding with the bars underneath the hospital bed—her face fell. "DiDi… you look like shit."

"Good to see you too, sis." The elder huffed, gingerly rubbing at her knees; that'sgoing to suck in the morning…

"I wish I had more time…" the younger murmured, fiddling with the white blanket draped over her body.

"What… more time for what?"

"To… I don't know… you and Dean, god, I've never seen such a great couple; and he cares so much about you… about us. Nadia… tell him about your last vision, he won't run, I promise… he's far too enamored with you to ever walk away." Nadia nodded sadly in reply while she inched her hands closer to her sister's, "… hun, don't try to heal me…"

"… I…"

"Bullshit, we both know you were going to try, and we both know what will happen if you do… it won't be enough to save me, and it'll kill you; look at you, I'd be surprised you could have a vision right now without slipping into a coma." Nadia looked at her in shock as she chided her, when she finished, she looked away almost as if the proper reply was written on the floor someplace.

"Ugh, a coma would be really bad right now." She groaned as she rubbed her forehead, jumping with a hiss when her hand found the gauze, again. "…fuckin' demons…"

"Yea, that head-butt looked like it sucked hardcore… how many stitches?"

"16 apparently…" her face softened when she paused, as if remembering how critical a condition the youngest Coltier was in, "… I'm sorry kid… I'm sorry I couldn't save you…"

"Oh shut the hell up," the demand brought Nadia's attention to just how close to passing Emily really was, her usual fiery spirit was barely ebbing now and growing colder with each passing second. "I might have bitched about it at first, but this is all we've ever known. Life was getting dull anyway, you saved me from that; besides, you know better than me we can't save everyone…"

"You're not just any victim of this shit, Emmy!" frustration boiled over in Nadia, provoking the verbal explosion, "You're my sister, my family… the only one left."

Calmly, Emily laid her hand on her sister's arm; Nadia jumped at the touch of her baby sister's icy hands, "Dia… how many people, in our family, do you think ever got a chance to say goodbye in the end… or were able to die in a quiet hospital room?"

Clearly shaken and disturbed by the question, Nadia forced herself to look Emily straight in the eye with momentary bewilderment, "Uh… ah, I don't know… I don't think any of them got that chance; least not since the gun was made…"

"Well damn, DiDi; it looks to me like we're breaking traditions left and right. For all we know, it could be you and your children that start an altogether new tradition." The youngest mused gently, each word came out more and more hushed; her energy and ability to speak dwindled noticeably. "Goodbye Nadia, I l-love you… very… much…"

"Not now, Emmy," her sister begged desperately, "please Emmy… no, not now, don't leave me… don't go, don't go where I can't follow…" tears fell freely and rapidly as she sobbed, forcing each word out, "…I need you, baby sister… don't die, don't—" but no matter how hard she cried, no matter how much she shook the silent, cold and still form on the hospital bed… the only response Nadia received was the blaring sound of her sister's heart flat lining; a noise that frightened the fuck out of the remaining sister, leaving in it's wake the harsh, uncaring realization: Emily Coltier was dead.

"… tsk, tsk, and you could have saved her, too…" a tiny voice hissed patronizingly, catching her off guard; Nadia's head shot up with a gasp, she sniffled once… twice while looking wide-eyed around the room for the owner of the voice, but it seemed as though there was no-one there.

"Who said that… where are you? Show yourself…" she demanded sternly, voice still breaking a little as she fought her emotions back.

"You know who I am…" it taunted, louder this time. This time Nadia was able to tell where it was coming from: near the window a few feet from the foot of the hospital bed. Smoked billowed and twisted menacingly slow before the closed blinds of the window, revealing the dark silhouette and glowing yellow eyes that haunted Nadia's nightmares more often than she cared to admit.

"You bastard… if it wasn't for you, she'd still be alive!" the huntress seethed through clenched teeth as she glowered at the formidable being.

"Now, now Nadia, that's not a very polite greeting, now is it?" It scolded sardonically, "She could have lived whether or not I existed in your lives…"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, dear child, that you could have saved her… had you surrendered your powers and soul to me, joined so many of the other little children like you, realized your true potential and destiny… then you could have tried to save her and would have done a very good job in succeeding." Nadia rolled her eyes at the matter-of-fact tone Big Bad explained himself with. "…but, you didn't, spent most of your life resisting me, and now little Emily is dead. I wonder just how long you can continue living with all this on your conscience. You know, it really is a sad little scene I find you in… pity I don't let emotion weigh me down, had I a heart… I'd probably be in as bad a shape as you, Nadia my girl."

"What do you want?!" she spat angrily through fresh tears of mourning mingled with loathing.

"You… if you're ready to finally give up this ridiculous little charade and come home to your brothers and sisters, my child; come with me and join the others like yourself, follow through with the plans for which you were born. You're finally free of the thing that's kept you human… come home, Nadia, forget the things that make you suffer." He coaxed adamantly, "You are already beginning to let the evil in you peak out at the world, you let your sister's killer go… by the way, I appreciate that, and I'm quite surprised by it, too. I mean, she killed your sister, disturbed your deceased friend's eternal slumber in possessing her, and slashed your uncle's throat… yet you still let her go? You, Nadia, are an amazing specimen amongst all these wretched mortals…"

"What?!" she exclaimed disbelievingly, confusion and shock swirled about madly in her head.

"Oops, guess you didn't know that last little evil deed of your friend, oh well…" mock-alarm resounded in his voice, ending with a deflated murmur alongside a defeated little shrug. "The boys know what I'm talking about… just ask them about an old friend by the name of Meg…"

"Is this how you try to win people over? Cuz it's a piss-poor tactic, I'll never join you, never do anything evil; we devoted our lives to fighting evil a long time ago, don't think I'll stop just because the last of my family is gone." She barked defiantly at her shrouded adversary.

Sighing he lowered his head, veiled by darkness, and turned his heel to take a step towards her, "I see I came a little too soon, when you're ready, daughter… I'll know."

Rage boiled in her brown orbs, she testily watched him as he moved about the room; finally she'd had enough when he addressed her as 'daughter', "I am not nor will I ever be your daughter… I had a father, he was a good man, and you murdered him! So help me god, I'll see you destroyed and when I do… I'll laugh."

It seemed completely unphased by the venomous promise, simply looked over his dark shoulder at her before colliding with the wall and dissipating in a cloud of frantic smoke. Nadia stared coldly at the spot for a moment or two prior to being slammed back into her grief as she remembered that Emily would no longer be there to calm the acidic hatred eating away at her insides at the very thought of The Demon. He said I could have saved her… No, no Nadia, he was lying to you, he was trying to sway your loyalty…there was nothing you could have possibly done to save her…

Out of the corner of her eye, she spied what looked to be the corner of a book peeking out from under Emily's pillow. A single, gentle tug revealed the journal they'd found at Pastor Jim's days before; hugging it tightly to her chest, Nadia's fingertips scraped at the worn leather cover, as if she were trying to reassure herself that the book was, indeed, there in her grasp. The huntress's thoughts were suddenly jarred by a knocking at the door; she pivoted her head towards the noise as the door clicked open. "Hey…"

"Dean!" Nadia interrupted mournfully, leaping from the wheelchair she rushed to the young man, collapsing when she was certain he had a good hold on her and wouldn't let her fall. As the girl sobbed against his chest, Dean cautiously let his gaze wander over to where Emily's body lay. Understanding sank in quickly, and he found himself feeling unsettled by death for the first time in his life; he'd just never seen it this way. A small shudder trailed up his spine as his focus lingered idly on the screeching machines connected to the frail looking form of the doomed huntress, knowing that the blue-grey pallor of the once exotically olive toned skin would haunt his thoughts until the end of his days.

"You okay?" he asked quietly, rubbing comforting circles on her back.

"Who's Meg?" ignoring his question, she felt anxiety flare within herself at how Dean's body went rigid against her at the mention of this 'Meg' person.

"A girl that Sam and I knew… she was possessed…"

"Was she one of those upper level jerks?" it was almost as if he wanted to avoid the subject completely, saying as little as possible, responding in head movements where a simple yes or no would suffice; she knew she wouldn't like what she was digging up, but guilt and urgency fueled the questions, and they flew out of her mouth before she got a second chance to think them through, "… she killed my uncle, didn't she?"

What the… is there a leak? She thought as she felt a drop of warm liquid fall onto the top of her head, when she looked up at the Winchester… her answer became crystal clear. Dean's jaw was clamped shut, cheek muscles twitching once or twice, aside from the dazed glitter of threatening tears and the slight quiver in his chin his face remained blank. He's crying… holy shit, he's crying… "And now she's taken my sister from me. That's why you yelled… when I let her go… you knew the things she'd done to my family in the past…"

There was a beat of silence before he inhaled sharply, nodding with his eyes glued on Emily's lifeless face.

"… I let her go… she killed Jim, tortured and killed Emmy… I'm sure she's tried to kill you guys… and I let her go…" her confusion quickly morphed into disbelief and disgust, Nadia wrenched herself away from Dean and began to stare at her hands like they had suddenly turned into ten rotting tentacles. Their blood… it's all on my hands now…

"Nadia… you didn't know—"

"NO, but I should have! Dean, I should have known better… 'the only good demon, is a dead demon', just like Jim used to say, and I didn't listen…" with her hands shaking frantically, she slowly backed away from Dean and out of the room, away from her deceased sister, away from the man trying to save her; with each inch she put between herself and what she was fleeing from the more hysterical she became.

"Nadia, don't start this self-blame crap… that Sammy's hobby and its bad enough when he does it. Now, calm down, you need to calm down." In truth, had their positions been switched, he would have blamed himself, too; but, as per usual for the elder Winchester brother, Dean would have kept it to himself, secretly kicking himself in the ass about it. Even now, in his attempts to calm her, he refused to think any of this was Nadia's fault; she had no idea about Meg or the things she'd done, she hadn't even had a vision about it… how could she have possibly known?

Nadia, however, didn't see it that way; taking into consideration what she'd just learned, a new thought came to her and infected her mind. It all makes sense now… "Dean, please… stay away from me, I'm poison; I'll destroy anyone who comes too close… I don't want to hurt you, Dean; I don't want you to end up like her!" Wincing at the emotional and physical pain it brought, she pointed haphazardly at her sister's room; when she found her way to be partially clear, Nadia broke into sprint in light of her sudden desire to be far from her late sister and the hunter.

So she ran, despite her injuries, lightly, stealthily dodging obstacles in her path. Each step shot bolts of white hot pain up her legs, her leaden arms swung quickly at her sides regardless of the fact that they felt like they were about to fall off or become consumed by fire. Every inch of the huntress ached from her injuries, but as she fled, she felt nothing; just the cold stab loneliness topped off with exhaustion. Even when she came to a screeching halt, Nadia still had yet to realize that blood oozed from her ripped brow, leaving a thickly saturated lump of gauze loosely taped to her forehead with a disturbingly large red streak of blood flowing down her cheek; though, it didn't seem as bad as it was due to the shower of tears intermingling with the blood trail.

Gasping, she didn't know if the person she saw standing a couple of yards in front of her were actually there, or if the massive amount of sudden blood loss was playing tricks on her eyes. Slowly, the huntress inched towards the man, clinging to her uncle's journal for dear life, "… John?!"

Ahh holy crap! Such a heartwrenching chapter to write, I dunno how it did it, but the required reading of Rena's Promise(a damn good book about sisters surviving Aushwitz) really helped in shaping this Ch, as well as structure and whatnot. Anyway, hope you enjoyed, cuz it's all kinds of crazy from here on out. Reviews-- little reminders that I haven't completely lost my mind from midterm week.