(June 1, 2026 Lily and Oliver: 35)
LILY: My eyes pop open at 6:43 in the morning. I hear Oliver snoring from behind me and I slowly lean forward and try to sit up. I grasp the bed sheets and grunt as I pull my body weight my daughter's weight up.
I reach my goal and give a long sigh. I look over at Oliver and smile. The very top of his head is poking up from the covers. His hair is shorter now from his hair cut last week. I watch the early morning shadows move across the floor.
Our cream colored curtains are pulled shut but a thin line of sun sneaks its way free. I'm at peace and so is the baby. She is not moving or turning, she is still and I'm grateful. I feel Oliver turn around in bed. I know he is watching me even through closed eyes. I feel his hand creep up my shirt and to my stomach.
He strokes my stomach and kisses my hot skin. I open my eyes as he rests him head on me. He is whispering something to the baby. I wait until he is finished. "We need a name Ollie."
He nods. "I'll get the book." Oliver reaches for the large green book titled Dictionary of Given Names on his nightstand and we flip through it.
"Jane?" I say.
Oliver makes a face and turns two pages. "It means gift of god." We shake our heads.
"Let's try something a little unusual. Irette? Or Jodotha?" Oliver says bubbling with ideas.
I laugh and take the book from him. "What about Clare?" Oliver chews on the inside of his cheek and repeats the name over and over.
"Clare… Clare… I like it. Bookmark that one."
I fold the top part of the page and we read on. "Look, how about Audrey?" Oliver offers with a smirk. I shrug my shoulders. "Mark that one too."
"Wait!" Oliver says taking the book and smiling. "Beatrix." I think about it. I put my hold over my stomach and rub it. Are you a Beatrix? "What does it mean?" I ask.
Oliver clears his throat. "Latin for voyager, traveler through life."
I look at Oliver and he stares back at me. We nod together. Oliver puts his hand on my taut stomach again and Beatrix kicks hard where his hand is. He stares up at me, amazed. He runs his hands over me exploring the unfamiliar territory. "How many Okens can you fit in there?"
"Oh, there's room for one more."
"Beatrix." He says softly.
"Time voyager."
"She'll like it." Oliver is pulling my underwear down my legs and over my ankles. He tosses it off the bed and looks at me.
"Careful…"
"Very careful." He agrees and strips off his clothes.
(June 2, 2026)
LILY: I'm lounging in one of the lawn chairs out back. There is a half drunk glass of lemonade next to me with melting ice cubes in it. Oliver is out for the afternoon with his brother. I needed some time to myself anyway so I was happy to wave them off. He should be back soon for dinner but I'm hungry now.
Beatrix has been squirming around and I consider getting up and hunting for something edible in the kitchen. But I decide on what I always do when Oliver isn't around to feed me. I get up slowly, in increments and walk sedately to the house.
I find my purse, turn off the living room light, write a note and lock the doors. Being out and walking feels good. Once again I' am surprised and surprised to be surprised at how big I really am. But I recover quickly at the door of the small Thai Restaurant.
The restaurant is cool and full of people. I get ushered to a table near the window. I order spring rolls and Pad Thai with tofu, safe and bland. I drink a whole glass of water. Beatrix presses against my bladder; I go to the bathroom and when I return my food is waiting.
I imagine what Oliver and I would be discussing if he were here. Next I picture Beatrix sitting with me. I see her blond hair tied up in a messy pony tail. She is eating with me and slurping up her noodles and playing with her stuffed elephant named Alfonzo.
I pay and leave. The sky is getting darker and I hurry home. When I see our house on the corner street I fiddle with my keys and open the door.
"Thank God!" Oliver shouts running to me. We kiss and I give him a funny look. "I thought you were at the hospital!"
"Well I wrote a note." I say putting my things down. He smacks his forehead and laughs. We sit down and curl up to one another. I'm home.
(June, 3 2026 Oliver and Lily: 35)
OLIVER: Lily has pacing around the house like a tiger. The contractions come every twenty minutes. I tell her to try and get some sleep. She lies down only to get right back up. Around three she finally gets some sleep. I watch her and play with her hair. Her breathing is nice and regular. I drift with her.
"I want to go to the hospital." Lily says at four. I open my eyes and glance up at her stern face.
"Sure. Let's call up Miley." I reach for the phone and dial their number. It rings four times before Jake answers.
"Muh?" He says.
"It's time. Want a lift?" I hear him mutter something and then I hear Miley tell me she will pick us up. I call Doctor Kendrick's office, the women Cindy told us about, and leave a message. I turn and see Lily crotched down on all fours rocking back and forth.
"Oliver… pray tell, why we decided to do this again?"
"Supposedly when they let you keep the baby. Come on, I'll get your bag and we'll wait for Miley and Jake." I help her up and we walk outside.
In no time their car is in our driveway. Miley helps me maneuver Lily into the back seat with me. Lily is sweating and holds my hand tightly.
"It hurts. Oh God it hurts." She hisses.
"Think of something else… something nice." Miley encourages rubbing her back.
"Tell me… about something." Lily begs holding my hand at bone shattering strength. I rack my memory for something, anything to calm her. "Remember that day at the beach when we were ten? You and I surfed for the very first time. It was in late August and the water was perfect: nice and cool just the way we like it."
"I r-remember- Oh God!" Lily cries.
"Come on Lily it's just the baby leaning on your spine, you've got to turn, okay?" Miley says softly. Lily changes her position and breathes out slowly. We reach the hospital and we get out. As soon as Lily steps out of the car her water breaks.
Miley runs to fill out the paperwork at the front desk and I help Lily into a wheelchair. An old hefty black nurse smiles at us. "Hello I'm Annette. I'll take you to Doctor Kendrick."
I follow as she wheels Lily down the hall. Once we are in the room Lily immediately gets on her hands and knees. Miley puts things away, toiletries in the bathroom clothes in the closet. Jake and I stand helplessly.
"Lily how about a bath? You'll feel better in warm water." Miley nods at her. Lily is panting and can't move. I bring her to the bathroom where Annette is filling the tub. Jake excuses himself from the room.
"Should I stay?" I ask Lily.
"Yes! You stay where I can see you!" Lily demands. She gets into the tub and I have to sit and watch tears pour from her pretty blue eyes. Miley walks back to the room to pull the covers down off the bed and fix up the place.
Lily makes a terrible noise; it is a deep despairing groan of pure agony. I shudder, what have I done to her? I think of fourteen year old Lily lying in the wet sand at the beach laughing at my lame jokes. Oh Lily I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.
Annette checks Lily's cervix. "Six centimeter, good girl." She coos. Lily smiles then grimaces while clutching her stomach and letting out another howl of pain. I feel sick and faint. I run my fingers through her hair and rub her back.
Doctor Kendrick rushes to us as she walks into the room. She begins telling us a bunch of information that means nothing to me. But then she turns to Lily. "Would you like an epidural?"
Lily nods fiercely and we get her out of the tub and into a dry night gown. Miley is waiting by the bed with ice chips. After she places them down she looks to me I nod and she leaves. Lily lies down on her side and whimpers. Her face glistens in the florescent lights she is wet with sweat and tears.
A man with a beard comes in and hooks up an IV and inserts an extremely long needle into her spine. Kendrick is examining her and frowning at the fetal monitor.
"Lily." She says softly crouching down to her level. "Your little girl is scared. The heat beat is racing. You have to be clam, Lily, so the baby can be clam, yes?"
"It hurts so much."
"That is because she is very big." Kendrick's voice is quiet and soothing. "How are you doing Oliver?" She asks smiling at me.
"Not very relaxed." I say nervously my eyes darting to Lily and back to Kendrick.
"Things are improving: see?" Say Kendrick. "It is like a cloud that passes over, the pain goes away." I watch Lily's face loose a bit of the tension. "Your doing much better. Tell her you are fine. Sing her a song?"
Lily looks up at me. "Say the E.E Cummings poem." She asks in a raspy voice. Kendrick walks to back of the room and flips the lights off. It is nice and dark and cool. The machine deeps and I crawl into the bed with her. I rest my head on Lily's stomach and whisper the poem.
"Lily has a rose
(I have none)
"don't cry dear violet
you may take mine"
"O how, how, how
could I ever wear it now
when the boy who gave it to
you is the tallest of the boys"
"He'll give me another
if I let him kiss me twice
but my lover has a brother
who is good and kind to all"
"O no, no, no
let the roses come and go
for kindness and goodness do
not make a fellow tall"
Lily has a rose
no rose I've
and losing's less than winning(but
love is more than love)"
Kendrick smiles and clicks off the machine. "Perfect she's doing better." She beams at us and walks out with Annette. Lily is drifting off to sleep and I take a moment to watch her but my eye accidentally catches with the anesthesiologist's his face clearly reads: What kind of a pussy are you, anyway?
LILY: The sun is up and I'm lying numb on this strange bed in a blue room. The pain has left but I know that it is not far gone, that it is sulking somewhere under the bed and will jump out when I least expect it. The contractions come and go, remote, muffled, like fog hanging over me.
Oliver is sitting with me. Miley and Jake came in earlier just to check in. Miley fed me shaved ice out of a paper cup, it tasted like stale snow. Oliver looks ready to throw up so I put my hand on his shoulder and smile. "It's ok." I say.
It's ok Beatrix, you're not hurting me: Come out, come out where ever you are. Time passes and the pain rolls in and out. Annette comes in and checks me. She smiles and tells us I'm ready to head over to the delivery room. I'm shaved and scrubbed and moved out on a gurney and rolled through hallways. I watch the ceiling lights flash by.
We reach the room and everything is white and red. Oliver is wearing surgical scrubs and I can't help but wonder when he changed. I'm feeling a little light headed. I wonder why we are here and not at home safe and sound. But then I feel her, my daughter, she is surging and rushing and I push without thinking and I do this again and again like a game or a song.
I'm holding Oliver's hand and I hear him muttering something I can't hear. "She's crowned!" I hear Kendrick say. I push and push and I put my hand down to feel her delicate slippery wet velvet head. I want to hold her so badly so I push harder this time and then she is out. I feel empty and released. She is pink and curled into a small ball she let's out a scream and then I'm gone.
OLIVER: I can't help but cry just a little. I turn to Lily to tell her how wonderful she is and how much I love her but she has vanished. I have a pang of sadness. But then I see our daughter I take her in my arms and I look down into her deep blue eyes. She is cleaned and sucking her thumb.
There is a loud thud and my Lily is back lying on the delivery bed. Kendrick takes my daughter from me and I walk over and cover Lily up. She looks exhausted but happy. "Let me see her." She says and Kendrick hands Lily the baby. Lily strokes our daughter's chubby face and smiles. "Hello Beatrix."
It's the evening of Beatrix's first day on earth. The three of us are surrounded by balloons and small teddy bears. Lily is cradling her and kissing her cheeks. I sit cross-legged on the end of the bed and take pictures of them.
Snap! There's one of Lily laughing as Beatrix blows colostrums bubbles.
Snap! A close up on my precious baby girl's face.
Snap! All of us together snuggled up close.
I'm unloading the camera when I ask Lily, "Where did you go? In the delivery room?"
"Oh, I was walking around our old middle school hallways for twenty or so in the evening." She replies with a laugh.
"Are you ok?"
She shrugs. "I was pretty upset. I mean right when I'm about to meet Bee I get transported through time."
"Bee?" I say rising an eyebrow.
"Bumble Bee." Lily laughs. "Buzz." We spend the next few minutes making bee noises at little Beatrix.
"Knock, knock." Miley says walking in with Jake both smiling. Lily's head snaps up. "Come in! Come in!" She says waving them over. Miley holds Bee first and Jake collapses in one of the chairs.
I lie back on the bed and let Lily giggle with Miley for a minute. I haven't had a moment to just sit and soak it all in. Lily is glowing, she is smiling non stop and keeps playing with little Bee. My heart soars at the sight of them: My girls.
(June 5, 2026 Lily and Oliver: 35)
LILY: I wake up to music playing. Oliver has our copy of the Garden State movie soundtrack playing. Nick Drake's One Of These Things First is on softly filling up the house. Every muscle in my body aches. I get out of the bed carefully. My mouth is dry and has a bad taste in it. My breasts hurt, my cunt hurts.
Bee isn't in her crib. I walk downstairs and into the living room. Oliver holding her and the two of them are on the couch reading the newspaper. Bee reaches out at the paper with his small hands. Her eyes are huge and wide with curiosity.
"Sleep well?" Oliver asks looking to me.
"Yes, until I woke up I'm so sore." I whine and sit next to them. Oliver wraps his free hands around me and kisses my head. Later I take a nap. I dream about the forest and fields of sunflowers. When I wake up Bee is crying and Oliver is trying to sooth her with a song.
I take her from him and laugh. I unbutton my top and begin to feed her. She sucks on me and fall back asleep.
"Oliver!" I say and he comes running in from the kitchen. "Take her!" I say I can feel it coming. Oliver gently scoops Beatrix up from me and I hold my head and…
(September 15, 2042 Oliver: 51 Lily: 35)
LILY: I hit the ground very hard. It knocks the breath out of me and I roll over on my back to try and gulp up as much oxygen as I can. When I finally regain some control. A young girl hands me a robe. I slip it on and sit in a chair next to a bed.
"Hey mom." She sighs sadly.
"Beatrix?"
"In the flesh. Oh and I'm sixteen."
"Cool." I say still a little woozy. Bee gracefully folds her long legs in Indian style on her yellow bed. She sits up straight and stares at me. "Can you talk or are you too tired?" She asks.
"I'm never too tired for you, but just give me a second." I say pinching the skin above my nose and breathing in and out of my nose carefully and slowly. "Okay! I'm all ears!" I smile looking at her.
She sighs and picks at her toenails that are painted a light pink. "I think I'm in love."
I tilt my head to the side. "With who?"
"Robert Ryan." She admits wincing. "No way!" I shout jumping excitedly. It's always fun to know that something like this ends happily.
"Guilty." Bee giggles. "But he keeps telling me I'm too young. I know he's five years older then me but I just really like him."
"Age doesn't matter." I tell her. "But if I remember my facts correctly he'll come around." I watch her face light up.
"Really? I know he and I have been great friends through out the years but… really?" She is glowing with happiness.
"Yes." I say grinning. "Just keep right on loving him things will turn out for the better." We hug and as we pull apart I look around. The room is a nice shade of red and there are many windows. This room in my time is mine and Oliver's study.
"Where's your dad?" I ask.
"He's… out." Bee tell me still smiling. "I think he and Jake went out somewhere together."
"Don't tell him I came ok? I don't want him to know that he missed me."
"Sure but he should be back soon. I know that he would like to see you." Bee assures me.
"Sorry baby but I think my time is almost-"
"Honey!" I hear Oliver shout from the front door.
I quickly dash out of her room and run to him. Oliver is standing by the front door looking through the mail.
"Ollie…" I say with a smirk. He looks up at me and smiles a lop sided wrinkled smile. His hair is getting gray and he is wearing reading glasses.
I stride over to him and embrace him tightly. "Where are you coming from?" He asks smelling my hair. "June 5th 2026 we just had Bee." I reply eyes closed lost in his tender touch.
"Ahh those are wonderful times." He tell me not pulling away. "You still smell the same as I remember."
I don't respond. Oliver is lost deep, deep in thought. His hands are old but I know them well. They are the hands that led mine during long walks. They are the hands that cup my cheeks during a good, good kiss.
"I love you." I say clinging to him nuzzling his chest.
"I love you." He whispers. And then I leave…
…….
CraftyNotePad I just loved the names you gave me! As you might have noticed Beatrix was my absolute favorite. I hope the whole hospital scene was fairly realistic. Not having had a child before I'm a little clueless. I just used the knowledge I had, which is why most of it is written from Oliver's perspective. There's still more to come. Leave your thoughts.
Lazy Days