Gee, Miss Guidicelli ( to the tune of "Gee, Officer Krupke" from "West Side Story")
Sung by the Managers, Meg, Madame Giry, Reyer, and the Phantom:
Andre, Firmin, and Reyer:
Deeeaar, Senora Guidicelli
Ya gotta understand
A chorus girl named Kelly
Is making out with a stagehand!
Joe Buquet is a pervert
The dancers are all drunk
Holy Moses!
If you don't sing, we're sunk!
All:
Gee, Miss Guidicelli
We want you to sing!
Damn, what a rock on
Christine's wedding ring!
You just don't realize
What shit we are in
And that dress makes you look thin!
Makes you look
Makes you look
Makes you look thin!
That dress you're wearing makes you look thin!
Meg and Madame Giry:
Dear kindly good Senora
Please sing for us tonight
The understudy is singing
The music of the night
The vicompte is sexy
His brother is rich
Holy Moses
Stop being such a bitch!
All:
Gee, Miss Guidicelli
Please lighten up
Coke tastes really good
With ice in a cup
Boy that was random!
It was quite insane!
I like that show about
Wisteria Lane!
WISTERIA LANE!
Wisteria
Wisteria
It's on Desperate Housewives!
The Phantom:
Dear Miss Guidicelli
You shouldn't be here
Trying a job working for
My friend named Nadir!
He's really a nice guy
Much nicer than you!
And Christine replaced you!
Reyer:
The trouble is she struts!
Andre:
The trouble is she yells!
Firmin:
The trouble is she screams!
Meg:
The trouble is she smells!
Madame Giry and the Phantom:
The trouble is the backdrop which mad her fell!
All:
Gee, Miss Guidicelli
Please listen please!
The Phantom:
I can help cure your musical disease!
All:
Stop all your complaining
Or you'll lose your job!
And Miss Guidicelli!
Screw you!