She's Lookin Through Me

Chapter Eighteen – Forgiveness

By Patche

Disclaimer – Inuyasha isn't mine… (Le sadness)

Summary – A girl who moves to a new school to be with her cousin, Utada Yuki. Yuki is the most popular boy in his whole school, so, thanks to him, Kagome is granted with that same luxury. In her new school, she has grabbed the attention of every boy... even our favorite hanyou. Rated-T for some cussing and minor limeyness?

--

It had been a week since they'd last hung out. Miroku and Sango were having a difficult time switching back and forth with Inuyasha and Kagome. They were trying their hardest to rekindle the broken relationship, but nothing was working.

They missed each other, but just wouldn't admit to each other. Kagome was too busy waiting for Inuyasha to come back and apologize… and he was too busy trying to forget about her and let her live her life with a man she did deserve.

First block would roll around everyday and they wouldn't speak a word to each other. Kagome still sat next to Houjo who was always so nervous and bashful around her.

Luckily, she didn't flirt back, so Inuyasha didn't feel the need to rip his head off.

He sighed and glanced out the window. It was raining again. It had rained all week. Kind of depressing.

Turning his head back to the front, he noticed two eyes on him. Kagome was watching but quickly turned back around in her chair.

'Stupid girl… if you'd just let me go this would be so much easier…' He thought to himself. He knew she still loved him and he would be an idiot to try and tell himself he didn't love her.

But they weren't supposed to be together. She was the popular, pretty girl… he was the half demon everyone was afraid of.

They were all afraid because of what Yuki told them a year ago.

That he murdered Kikyou.

Had he not saved Kagome, Yuki might have told them the same lie again.

Of course, he wouldn't have let anything happen to Kagome anyway. He just felt like an idiot for ever getting involved.

'I should have just stuck to the task… then I wouldn't have cared if Kagome hated me.'

--

He sniffled, walking his way home in the rain. He didn't take his bike today for some reason and he didn't bring an umbrella. He could tell he was getting sick.

As he walked, he felt every rain drop hitting his head, reminding him of the burden he'd be stuck with once his pitiful walk home was over with.

He'd be sick and when half demons are sick, it's no fun.

However, he felt all the raindrops stop and a shadow filled his vision. He looked up to see a pink umbrella over his head.

He tried to sniff out whoever it was behind him, but he could smell a thing. However, then the figure said his name, he recognized the sweet voice.

"Kagome…" He said without even turning around. Kagome nodded and walked in front of him to look at him, still holding the umbrella over both their heads.

"I'm so sorry…"

He gasped. He said it? Why? He was supposed to act like this wasn't hurting him and he didn't want her back…

She didn't deserve him.

"Me too." She said looking at him sadly. "Inuyasha, I don't like us like this. I loved being with you and being your girlfriend and hanging out with you late at night…" He nodded.

"Please, just… take me back?" Kagome asked sadly.

Inuyasha sighed and averted his eyes, walking further ahead than her or her umbrella.

"I'm sorry, Kagome… I can't."

--

It was a Saturday. She, Sango, and Miroku had all gone to the mall for a good time. However, while they were all having fun and enjoying themselves, Kagome felt less and less interested in getting involved. She missed Inuyasha too much.

She sighed, sitting at a table in the cafeteria watching Sango and Miroku have fun together like a couple.

She missed it. It had been a week exactly since they 'broke up' and now she didn't know what to do.

Why wouldn't he take her back? What did she do wrong?

"Kagome-chan…" Sango started, walking over to her friend. "You want to go look in some stores you'd like? I bought you a coffee…" Sango said holding up a coffee. Kagome sighed.

"Umm… actually… could you just take me home?" Kagome asked. Sango nodded as they made their way out of the mall.

They noticed it was raining once they got outside and quickly tried to cover themselves up.

Kagome didn't care, however… she didn't need an umbrella or anything. The rain reflected everything she felt inside at that very moment.

Rejection

Hate

Sadness

She had honestly never felt so alone before… and all for love? She didn't like one bit of it.

They quickly climbed in the car and drove off to Yuki's house.

She really wasn't looking forward to seeing Yuki again so soon. She'd been staying over there but most of the time, she was outside, pouting in the rain. She wouldn't say a word to him, no matter what. He was the one that ruined her relationship with Inuyasha.

He was the one that hired him, that bribed him… he knew something like this would happen. Yuki was probably just hoping it would be Inuyasha that got hurt… but lo and behold, his cousin was pretty badly injured in the fallout as well.

She sighed and leaned her head against the window.

"Kagome-chan, are you sure you'll be all right?" Sango asked with concern. Miroku sighed.

"We really are worried about your well being, Kagome-sama." He said. "You've done nothing but mope around for the past week." Miroku added.

"Kagome, we just don't like seeing you like this is all… is there anything we can do to help?" She asked.

Kagome shook her head. She hated this feeling… like some one broke her soul in half. She didn't want to move.

"No, thanks guys…" She said as they pulled up to her house. Sango and Miroku both gasped, but Kagome had her eyes fixated on the ground below to notice the hanyou standing in her driveway.

"Kagome…" He said. She looked up to see him standing there. She felt like she was glowing. Her heart was skipping beats.

'Why was he here?'

Still, she ran up to him, curiously. "Inuyasha?" She asked, placing a hand on his shoulder. "What are you…" She was cut off by the tight embrace he pulled her into.

"I'm so sorry. I was so wrong. I need you Kagome. I'm not okay without you." He felt her wrap her frail arms around him in return. "You're the best thing that ever happened to me."

Kagome let two tears fall simultaneously down her cheeks as she pulled away from him, smiling. "I forgive you…" She said leaning up to place her lips on his.

It wasn't their first kiss and was far from their last kiss. It wasn't a long one, just a heartfelt, makes your throat sore kiss. And they were so engulfed in it's wonder that they hardly noticed the audience gathering outside Miroku's car.

--

Yuki sighed glumly as he sat in the living room across from his cousin. He felt like a jerk for how he treated her. Maybe he was one, but he was just looking out for her. He wanted so badly to just apologize, but he knew Kagome wouldn't accept it.

He remembered days when they were younger and they'd fight about silly things like who got to eat the last slice of cake. And even though they fought all the time, he still loved Kagome. She was his only cousin and the closest thing he'd ever had to a sibling.

Yuki sighed remembering the day his father died and she showed up. No one else was really concerned with his feelings. They were all telling his mother how sorry they were. Why? She wasn't the one who lost her father… she lost a lover, something that isn't that hard to replace.

Kagome was the only person who stood by him and let him cry it out. In front of the rest of the world, he always had to be such a strong person. He had to be a man. But with Kagome, he could be the little boy again. He could cry, he could laugh.

That's why he was always so rough on her… she was the only person he could ever take anything out on. And no matter how bad things got, she always stood beside him.

But this time, Yuki feared he'd pushed the limit. His loathing for Inuyasha mixed with the urge to protect his cousin caused a great deal of problems.

"Yuki…" Kagome spoke, breaking him out of his trance.

"Why did you tell me that?" She asked. Her eyes did not make any efforts to look his way, she kept them fixated straight ahead. Her tone was filled with anger, although it came out sounding very calm.

"I didn't want to lose some one else to him." He said sadly. Kagome blinked before looking his direction.

"Lose some one else?" She asked. Yuki nodded. He was going to tell her the story, but not where he was the hero and Inuyasha was the bad guy. She deserved to know the truth. Why he hated Inuyasha so much… what all happened before she came.

"A year ago… before Kikyou died, I got a chance to meet her. She was my new lab partner in chemistry. When I first met her, I really thought she was a beautiful girl. She was so smart and talented and just held herself together so well. She was flawless…"

Kagome nodded. Why did it seem strange to picture Inuyasha with some one like that?

"Well… after getting to know her much more… I realized I'd fallen in love with her. She just was such an amazing girl; there was so much to love about her. But I found out she was dating one of the only hanyous in the school, Inuyasha. And at that point… I had fallen too hard to her to just let her stay with him.

So I tried my hardest to break the two up, but nothing worked. I wanted Kikyou to be mine. One day she caught onto all the tricks I was pulling and told me to back off because she was in love with Inuyasha… not me."

Kagome's eyes softened. No matter how horrible her cousin was or how stupid a reason to hate some one… she still felt bad for him. He was in love…

"Well, she told me this in the middle of the cafeteria in front of the whole school. Inuyasha wasn't around, but everyone else was. They all laughed at me. Being turned down by the girl in love with the half demon… the girl who could love anything didn't love me."

He clenched his fist. "And I just never let it go. Sure, Inuyasha was definitely the wrong person to blame in that situation… and I made his life hell."

He looked up at his cousin with the guiltiest look ever. "I told the whole school he was the one that murdered Kikyou."

Kagome gasped. 'That's horrible. How could Yuki do something like that?' She looked down, "Yuki that's such a horrible thing to do." She said softly. He nodded.

"I know. It's something I regret more than anything. That's why I went to him for this deal. I'm sure you probably thought it had something to do with knowing you were beautiful and he'd fall for you… but it was just to try and make amends. I felt so bad for what I'd done…"

Kagome looked sympathetically at her cousin.

"And when I found out he was in love with you, it just killed me. Because you… Kagome, you're the only person I could always go to and you never left me… and it hurt to see him stealing you away from me."

Kagome smiled. "Yuki, he wasn't stealing me away. No matter who I'm with, I'll always be your cousin…" He nodded.

"I know that… it's just that it gets really lonely at the top and I was kind of looking forward to you sharing the summit with me instead of just hanging out with the jock girl, the pervert, and the hanyou."

Kagome laughed. "Yea… well, I'm not really made for the top, I think. There are girls surrounding you that are just built to stand up there and be the tallest… but I'm not. People like to try and drag me to the top." She looked down. "But it's not where I want to be."

Yuki sighed. "You want to be with Inuyasha?" He asked. For some reason, the combination of his question and tone threw Kagome off a bit. She wasn't expecting him to lash out or anything, but she wasn't expecting him to be so understanding.

"Yea… that's my place." She said softly. Yuki nodded and stood up.

"Well, I'm going to go shower. This was a great little chat and all…" Kagome stood up.

"Wait…" She said running up to him. Yuki gasped as she wrapped her arms around him, using all her strength to give him one hug.

"I forgive you…" She said softly.

--

The next morning, the doorbell rang. Yuki walked up to the door groggily. He was so exhausted from his lack of sleep that night.

Kagome was on the phone with Sango all night long. He didn't get a wink of sleep thanks to her yapping.

He sighed opening to door to find Inuyasha was standing there, a bit confused. He was half expecting Yuki to throw some punches at him or scream… something.

But he didn't. Yuki just gave him a slight smile and called for Kagome.

'Did he just… smile at me?' Inuyasha asked himself curiously.' He looked up to see Kagome running to the door.

"I'll be back around seven." She said, giving Yuki a hug before running out the door.

"Okay…" He said shutting it behind her.

Inuyasha smiled looking down at the girl next to him. "What's with all the hugs and smiles now?" He asked. Kagome grabbed his hand and interlaced their fingers.

"Well, we're friends again…" She sighed. 'Everything is just the way it should be.'

AN UBER PLEASE READ The original chapter actually cut off somewhere around the kiss… but I wrote this little bit of dialogue and needed somewhere to put it… so I figured, last chapter? Sure. I know it might seem strange that I didn't end with some fluff… but I dunno… I wanted to give Yuki some more human qualities… maybe give some back ground on his character (I know it might be a little late for that). Umm so to explain all of this rapid updating… my Internet is being a pain in the ass. It won't stay connected for more than 5 minutes… so, if I want to upload a chapter, I have to do it fast lol.

I'd like to thank every single reviewer… I can't take the time to list out everyone that did review because my Internet can't stay connected that long. So, just know that if you've ever reviewed… I love you.

As far as the new story goes…

It's called Stain and is about two people (Inuyasha and Kagome) who were very much in love during high school. However, after being accepted to a university over seas, Kagome must leave her love for four years. But she did promise to marry him whenever she returned. She comes back early, but with amnesia. She doesn't remember anything or anyone from her past. So, her uncle gives her a job as a waitress while she tries to pick up the pieces of her lost past.

However, she finds an old friend working there as well… one that for some reason seems so familiar to a girl who shouldn't remember anything about him. It will be rated M not for any lemons… maybe limes but not lemons. I can't write them. And also, some language.

Okay… I've ALWAYS wanted to do a story like this about amnesia… but I mean… there are so many out there. So I though 'How weird if you could only remember one person…' Well she doesn't remember him so much as finds him very familiar.

The heart triumphs over the mind hee hee.

So please do read it whenever it comes out. Both the meaning of "Stain" and the band Staind inspired the title. I listened to a looot of their music to get me all pumped for writing this chapter.

Enjoy guys

Love always,

Patche