And That's What it's All About
Title: And That's What it's All About
Chapter: And Buffy Makes Three
Summary: Buffy returns to the battle…
Disclaimer: I own neither genre. Joss Whedon owns Buffy the Vampire Slayer. George Lucas owns the Star Wars franchise. I'm just a poor post-college graduate.
Spoilers: There are minor spoilers from both stories, especially Star Wars.
Notes: I honestly didn't think it would take this long to write this chapter. If it makes you feel better, I've had the last chapter written for about three months now and I didn't feel like posting that, so I went with this. I haven't been feeling well lately and on a positive note, my tests today went fantastic. The results aren't perfect and I have a lot to deal with, but at least now I know the truth. Therefore, I wanted to get this done in case something happens that might affect my future ability to write. The past month has been an extremely painful lesson, but at least I'm on medical leave. On the work front, there were two major cases in the past week, which delayed the chapter further. My days of writing without care of the world around me are LONG gone… sadly. Here you go - a shiny chapter. I really hope that it's okay… I knew what I wanted to do, it was getting it on the paper that was the problem!
x-o-x
And Buffy Makes Three
When I found myself on my feet again, I wasn't where I expected to be. Instead of clinging helplessly to the back of a cruiser as it sped through a vast field of asteroids, I was in a cramped hall that had none of the charm of the Jedi Temple back on Coruscant. In fact, even though I was able to float easily through the floor, the walls, the windows, the ceiling and through whoever decided to walk through me, I felt positively claustrophobic. Even the feeling was different. Instead of feeling like I was in a place of calm and controlled minds, I was stuck inside a tin-box full of gunfire.
And then it occurred to me that something might actually be wrong.
I turned and walked through one wall to reemerge on the other side with a slight whooshing noise. The sound of gunfire intensified. I continued moving automatically forward, unsure why I needed to be headed directly to the battle when the most I could accomplish was a bit of snide comments with a side of possession. Knowing me, the possession part was iffy. I had never been one to trust ghosts and basically thought all invisible people needed a stark reality check.
And here I was… a bloody ghost, as Spike would say. I was powerless to all that went on around me.
Well, I was mostly powerless.
I felt a sudden shift in the air. At the other end of the corridor, a pair of doors opened and three large objects came rolling through. They were followed by twelve of the ugliest things I had ever seen. Honestly… it looked like those robots that those stupid science geeks back at Sunnydale High would build out of old Coke cans and twine. And yet they moved with a sort of jerky grace, their weapons held in their metallic little fingers as they marched to the left behind the rolling mechanical whatever-they-were-called.
I decided to follow up on the string-bean robots. As I snuck in behind them, I heard a distinct voice from the other side of the door. "The Jedi have stormed the building," came a low, amphibious hiss. When the doors parted to allow more of these tin-can robots through, I caught a glimpse of two aliens who looked more like talking fish than anything I recognized. Before I could do any real surveillance, the doors closed, the robots ploughed through me and I was once again standing in a confined, tinny hallway like an idiot.
There was nothing more for it… I was going to have to follow them if I wanted in where the action was. That's me… action Buffy. Only this time, my mind is formulating a plan… sort of.
As I rushed to keep up with the automatons that, for their constructive glory were actually quite speedy, I caught a look outside. For a moment I froze. "Wow," I whispered, pressing my face right to the glass but being absolutely sure I kept from going back outside. The entire city was actually built with skyscrapers that would sadly rival the Empire State Building. But what really drew my attention was the space battle raging right over the city. Several large ships that looked like Commander Cody's were firing at large ships that looked like flying saucers from television. "Is this real?" I marveled, watching the ensuing battle above me.
That was, until a large section from one of the flying saucers went suddenly spinning out of control, colliding with one of the tall structures directly in front of me. The result was a fireball that seemed to curl downwards. The building I was in shook and I found myself on the verge of flying into said battle. Stepping back, I turned and hurried after the robots again. It was then that this powerful feeling hit me, nearly knocking me through yet another wall. I stopped running for a moment to pause on the sudden tingle I felt, even though I had no body.
Wherever he was, whatever he was doing… Obi-Wan was in trouble. And I felt another pull. Anakin was with him.
Even though there was little I could do, I had to do something. I had to find a way. That wasn't just the girl in me, it was the Slayer too. And she was just dying for some payback.
x-o-x
Meanwhile, several levels up, two Jedi poured through a corridor cluttered with the fallen forms of dozens of droids. They were the pathetic forms that they had once faced back on Geonosis and the ones Obi-Wan had faced way back on Naboo, which he considered to be the highlight of his Jedi career.
Stepping out of the room while kicking aside the metallic debris, Anakin glanced out at the large, bay windows that looked out over the whole of the command structure they were currently working their way through. Outside, Anakin could see thick, black smoke curling up from the impacts of the ships on the buildings as well as significant fire still being exchanged between both sides. Drawing a soft breath, his eyes glanced towards the Republic's clone ships now drawing closer to the landing bays.
Wincing, Anakin remembered the past few hours; he had left Obi-Wan hanging after the Jedi had lost his Living Force escort. Obi-Wan had managed to make it through the minefield and get to the landing bays and had only damaged an engine doing so. R4 was less lucky, but the little droid had a wicked sense of humor. Anakin hadn't even made it into the minefield yet.
When he had finally reached the landing bay, Commander Cody had come to the rescue. Instead of Obi-Wan being dragged by a tractor beam into an ion storm, the clone troopers had stepped in, destroying the two droid-controlled ships. Obi-Wan had then limped off to the landing bay and had begun the pursuit of the Viceroy.
It wasn't that Anakin was being careless; he just had more important things on his mind. He was rather irritated at the two little ships that had been chasing him. He had taken a few fancy turns, showing off for no one in particular as he led both fighters to their doom. They were certainly not a match for the best pilot in the galaxy, no way and no how. It was a sentiment he shared with Obi-Wan moments after he freed his master from a storage room that had been rapidly filling with both dangerous toxic gases and water. The droids had learned their lesson the first time.
Now they had made their way into the open corridor. Obi-Wan hadn't yet spoken to him, not even to thank him for saving his life. They fought side-by-side and yet Obi-Wan maintained his silence. Anakin was desperate for his former Master to speak to him; he felt guilty enough about leaving Obi-Wan in two precarious situations alone. Even when that ghost-figure form of Buffy was there, she could have at least kept him entertained by rambling on and on like she always did.
Now, after glimpsing the battle surging on over the city, Anakin felt a grim smile press his lips. Obi-Wan passed behind him, deactivating his lightsaber. His beard twitched as he followed Anakin's gaze and sighed slowly. "Well, we certainly can't take on the entire army."
Anakin felt relieved that Obi-Wan had spoken, but wasn't prepared to answer that one question. "Cody will come," Anakin assured his Master, forcing his voice into the cocky overconfidence he usually displayed when showing off his rather abundant skills. "If he doesn't…"
"I wasn't quite sure you were coming," Obi-Wan said in a lighthearted tone, glancing at Anakin with slight suspicion in his eyes. "And yet I figured you had never let me down."
"I didn't let you down, Master," Anakin replied slowly. "I was… engaged."
"Oh, yes," Obi-Wan snorted, amused. "I recall seeing that sort of engagement… it involves you using gravity from the asteroid fields to catapult your enemies onto the sharpest surface. I don't recall seeing that in the mission briefing. Perhaps I missed it."
At this point, Obi-Wan was abusing sarcasm, Anakin thought dryly. "I was still engaged with the enemy. It wasn't my fault you thought you could take on the Viceroy's guards alone."
Obi-Wan shot him a dark look and Anakin shook his head, his keen ears suddenly attuned to the sound of more droids approaching. "We should hurry," Obi-Wan said, glancing over his shoulder. "They are closing in our position."
The two Jedi quickly moved off down the corridor.
x-o-x
I'm bored again. Following droids that look quite stupid was even more boring than staying behind and watching the battle. I suddenly didn't care if I was sucked back into the sky. Even another go in the cavern o' destiny was more enthralling than this!
I stopped when I suddenly heard voices talking. They were coming from a corridor running parallel to ours. Judging by how they sounded, they were worth a peek. Tucking my body away from the droids, I found myself in a room with two ugly creatures. They were worse than the droids. They reminded me of some weird science fiction flick Xander had forced me to watch at some point. A cross between a frog and an alien, they had thick lips, slurred incomprehensible speech and waddled like ducks.
"The Jedi are in the temple," the one was saying to the other. "I have sent the droids to deal with them. They will soon be locked down."
"We should arrange a transport," the second said, his lips barely moving. When he blinked, it was creepy. I was hit by the sudden desire to serious injure or kill them both, but I held my stance. I am, after all, only a ghost. Instead, I fixed them full of bad vibes and seriously wished Obi-Wan was here, jamming his lightsaber up this guy's wide and rather amphibious ass. Instead, I was forced to watch as they turned, cackling, still speaking about 'Jedi scum' and 'should have killed them on Geonosis'.
I was really going to have to talk to these guys about telling me what I needed to know. I didn't know what Geonosis was or who it was or how it was related to my two Jedi. Being attached to Obi-Wan was hard work, I decided as I peeled out of there. I had to catch up to the droids somehow. They had disappeared again and this place was a maze of tight passageways and doors that seemed a bit too foreboding.
And yet, I could feel Obi-Wan's presence. I don't really know how I can feel him, but I realize that as my cross thingy now belongs to him I guess a part of my soul does, as well. Lucky me. I'm stuck with the one tight-ass Jedi. Even if he did have a rather appealing rear, it wasn't nearly as stellar as Anakin's. Now there was a man with my sort of style. And he had that dangerous, broody look about him that attracted me all too well.
Okay, now I'm daydreaming about the two hot Jedi. Hot… yes, that they are. But right now they are in deep trouble, and that's about as hot as it can get.
I decided to forgo my usual fear about floating upwards and went for broke. I jumped up, felt my body pass through ice-cold metallic bulkheads and wiring that seemed to feel different as I passed my way through it. Once I got to the next level, I planted my feet down, smoothed my non-existent clothes and glanced around me, hoping to see something. I was in a narrow hallway of sorts, but I couldn't figure out where. There were no dandy windows looking over a battle anymore. There were no droids passing through cursing the existence of Jedi when they should be cursing those morons who made them so dinky. Nope… I was nowhere, engulfed in nothing and, better yet, my senses were starting to go haywire.
Thank God for my slayer radar, especially when I could do nothing to satisfy it.
I really wish I could insult someone right about now.
x-o-x
"Master, we're in trouble."
"I can see that," Obi-Wan grunted as he drove his lightsaber through the neck of a single droid before twisting his wrist and bringing the glowing staff through the abdomen of a second. As both droids collapsed, he reached out with his mind through the Force and pushed them away, allowing another flood of droids to enter the small room.
Surrounded by five entrances, all of which seemed intent on filling with droids, the two Jedi stood back-to-back. Somewhere along the line, Cody's promise of showing up with clones to assist with the droid army numbering in the thousands had faded, leaving both Jedi with resentful thoughts towards their Clone commander. The only thing they could really do was block blaster bolts flashing from five separate directions. There really wasn't any way out and, adding to their predicament, more Destroyers were filling the ranks of the dead droids. The larger super battle droids were also starting to appear, red flashes emanating hot bolts from their wrist weapon devices.
Yet neither Jedi was ready to give up just yet.
x-o-x
My salvation came in the form of a Republic clone fighter, which smashed through the wall and landed in a twisted, fiery heap about ten feet in front of me. Though I scampered back, there was nothing funny about white-hot shrapnel shredding through my precious ghost-y self.
Waving a hand through the smoke, I moved to the next parallel corridor after passing through a gaping hole full of warped metal and scorched wires. It was probably some deadly poison I had walked through, too.
Suddenly, my ghost-y self had a lot more appeal.
Two things happened when I stepped away from the debris. I found light again, something that my Slayer-keen eyes had been desperate to find again, since looking around a narrow corridor in the dark was not fun. The other thing that happened was a battalion of droids were marching by.
I needed to follow them and, judging by the swell of fury within me, something was happening to the Jedi. Deciding I had nothing left to lose, I rushed forward and threw my body into the droid's. The sensation was downright scary, but I had to give the droid a lot more credit than I did before. I screamed, but all the droid did was shake its head like a mad dog.
Slipping the gun more tightly, I felt my fingers curl around metal as I stared at the beautiful weapon. It wasn't a bright blue blade of light, but it was a start.
Grinning wickedly, I began marching, lifting my weapon and aiming it for the back of that stupid tin-can's head.
I felt like me again… I was feeling alive.
x-o-x
"If we ever get out of this, I'm going to seriously hurt that man."
Obi-Wan turned with a bemused smirk to Anakin. The two were sealed inside a bulkhead. Their lightsabers had been taken, but at least they were alive and uninjured. Why, they had no idea. Being stored in a tiny corner cabinet with barely enough room for two to stand would have been hilarious in a normal situation. But when their situation was dire and their chance to capture the Viceroy of the Trade Federation was slipping away, well… they were still fortunate to be alive. And yet neither one of them could figure out why.
"Corporal, retrieve them."
"Roger, roger."
"This is good," Obi-Wan muttered, feeling along the smooth wall panels until he felt a flush creep into his cheeks and pulled his hand back; Anakin's eyes were twinkling at him in the darkness and Obi-Wan knew exactly what he had just done.
"Glad you enjoyed it, Master," Anakin beamed at him, evident even in the darkness.
"Now is not the time to tease me," Obi-Wan replied, feeling his old grumpiness take over. As the door opened, they were faced with normal battle droids.
"Out," one ordered, holding his weapon as a gesture and pointing to the floor. "Process them."
"Process us for what?" Anakin muttered as he felt the cold barrel prod him in his back.
"No speaking."
"Why can't I talk since you're obviously going to kill us anyway?" Anakin grumbled as he ambled along.
"No speaking."
"Stupid droids," Anakin sighed as they continued moving, turning a sharp corner where another battalion of droids were waiting. There were only a dozen in this group, but he noticed that their two lightsabers had been attached to its bony hips.
"Jedi scum."
"Yes, yes, we know," Anakin couldn't resist saying.
"No speaking."
This damned thing sounded like a broken record! As they trudged along, Obi-Wan's mind was formulating a plan to retrieve their lightsabers and get out of there alive. Anakin was doing his job glowering and pushing buttons with their luck. If they weren't dead by now, it was for a reason. His mind was about to settle on something when an overwhelming sense of calm nearly stopped him straight in his footsteps. He felt the cold barrel of the droid's weapon tip into his back and forced himself to go onwards. He felt as though the Living Force had just given him this great, swelling feeling of hope.
Commander Cody might not be here, but someone was.
And that someone was sending off vibes so powerful it was almost overwhelming. Glancing sideways at Anakin, he saw that his former Padawan had a strange look on his face. Anakin met Obi-Wan's steady gaze, his lips pressed into a thin line.
The power was flooding inside him, reaching to his fingertips, but Obi-Wan did not make his move. He could not make his move. Not yet… he had to wait for the perfect time.
x-o-x
I had seen them. They were prisoners of the clunky droids, but at least they were alive. They looked slightly worse off than when I had last seen them, but they were standing and walking. Well, Obi-Wan looked quiet and grumpy. Anakin kept making offhand comments to the droids. I couldn't help but smile; Anakin had my kind of humor. And when he looked like that, all dangerous with those scratches?
Down girl.
Smiling, I continued along behind the other droids, attempting not to blow my cover. Well, not until I could shoot the whole lot of them. There were other droids that were rolling out – destroyers. Droidikas? God, my memory sucks.
You can't blame a girl for being out of her element, I guess.
I continued to walk until we reached a room. One of the droids tapped on a button and the door slid open from the bottom. "Inside," he commanded in that nerdy, nasal tone. Obi-Wan and Anakin shuffled inside. I followed until I saw what was inside. It was definitely a trap.
Curling my fingers around the weapon, I gazed at the panel on the door and reached over and with a tap of my metallic hand, I sealed the Jedi inside. They both turned around, rushing out in protest, but they were already locked in. Turning to face the droids behind me, I gazed at the two lightsabers with a twinkle in my eye. "I'm taking those."
"Those weren't your orders."
"Orders? I don't need to follow orders," I replied, sliding my hand down the shaft of the gun and feeling the soft click beneath the grasp. Yes, metallic fingers though they were, they served the purpose I wanted. "Since when have I followed orders?"
"Return the droid to the processing center," one muttered to another. "It needs repairs."
"Why? Because I'm suddenly thinking outside of the tin can?" I said, watching their reactions gleefully. Well, if they had had facial expressions, it would have been better. I could still annoy droids to the point they fingered their weapons and started moving their feet, swaying like they were drunk. I imagined for a second what it would be like to take something like rum and ignite it beneath them. Screaming droids… yes, that was a pleasant thought.
And then I felt something jab into my shoulder. That was not a pleasant thought.
"You've just done the dumbest thing you could have done," I said, lifting my weapon back up. The droid who threatened me didn't last three seconds against a Slayer's rage and the surprising flexibility of the stupid tin can I was possessing. This was awesome, I thought, bending over completely backwards and shoving my gun up underneath his chin. His head fell off before he had a chance to react. Smiling a smile I alone knew I had, I returned to my standing position and glanced at the astonished gazes on the faces of the other droids now surrounding me. "Now that we've got that established… any questions?"
x-o-x
Once they had taken out the four droids inside the tiny closet, both Jedi returned to the door, listening to the sound of fire being exchanged.
"Do you think Cody has come for us at last?" Anakin mused as he pressed his ear to the door.
"I don't hear any voices except for droids," Obi-Wan frowned, stepping back from the door. What they couldn't see was a droid with strength and flexibility they couldn't have believed even if they had seen it with their own eyes. It was kicking aside the other droids and using the Living Force to enhance the weapons fire. Aside from that, it sacrifices a great many ding on its arm as it swung its way through a entire ring of droids, leaving a single unit standing in the middle of a pile of rubble.
Reaching down, the droid picked up two lightsabers and tucked them inside its belt. A moment later, it seemed to step back on one leg and move the hip joints slightly. If anyone had been watching, it would have appeared the droid was modeling its newest acquisitions.
What they did hear was the sound of another flank approaching. Glancing at his former mentor stormily, Anakin stepped away from the door as the sounds of firepower grew. Obi-Wan leapt away too the moment he heard a familiar hiss of a missile on the other side of the door. Suddenly understanding the intent of the one droid, he let out a cry and spun away from the door just as something hard slammed into it. Fragments of scorching metal flew in every direction and smoke filled their entire room. Coughing slightly, Anakin dove for his Master, who was on the ground and not moving.
"Master," Anakin whispered under his breath, shaking his friend's shoulder. Obi-Wan opened his eyes and gazed warily up at him. "Viceroy Gunray or not, we need to get off this level."
"Yes, I quite agree."
Yet as they made their way through the smoldering wreckage of the door, they came across something entirely… astonishing. A single droid was standing amidst the debris of both regular battle droids and the wrecked versions of the supers, shooting at its feet. Every time a bullet bounced off the metal, it would leap in the air, do a little turn and then land with a quiet, "oh".
"That's definitely a defective droid," Anakin said. "If it could have survived all of this…"
"Defective or not, I think it heard you."
The droid had just turned around to face them. On its belt hung two lightsabers, glimmering against the doom and the remnants of smoke. It turned to them and instead of continuing to shoot at its feet, it lifted its armament to them.
"This can't be good," Anakin muttered.
x-o-x
Good God… were they always such intuitive rejects? I was standing there, shooting off my own feet and they just stared at me like some defective droid. Technically, though…
"What is that?"
I heard the horrified whisper and smirked. I could play for awhile. They had, after all, gotten themselves into this mess. If they'd screwed up this badly, they could wait to get to the Victorious one, or whichever amphibious moron they needed to get.
"Must be a factory defect," Obi-Wan whispered in response, his lips barely moving. But my Slayer-enhanced hearing heard him, loudly and clearly. As I stepped for them, their lightsabers dangling from my belt, I turned and lifted my weapon.
"Move."
They both scampered forward, realizing it was all a ruse. Feeling quite elated that I had at least gotten something more than a random annoyance or a concerned look from them, I continued forcing the poor droid forward while Anakin and Obi-Wan held a frenzied, whispered conversation in front of me. More droids had arrived after my slaughter and I just sauntered past. "Jedi uprising," I said, nodding my head at the lead officer who came forward with his gun cocked. "Under control now."
But I had no sooner walked five steps that the two Jedi really did go through with the uprising. It lasted all of two seconds. Another fleet of droids arrived and surrounded them and, without their weapons, they were pretty much helpless. Which gave me the power to do something either really stupid that would risk all of our lives or something intelligent which would mean getting them the hell out of harm's way so they could do their job.
Huh. Look at me, all grown-up ghost-y with the decision making skills now. Sounds like a perfect résumé.
"I'll process them," I barked, going for choice two. Although I wanted to show off how flexible these tin cans really were, we still have a job to do. "You should get to the—"
No sooner had I spoken the words did the doors flash open and after what seemed like an eternity, Commander Cody's troops had arrived. In the vicious firefight, I caught Anakin and Obi-Wan attempting to sneak away. I couldn't give them that chance, not without flashing my encore. Lifting the gun, I blasted the door panel to the exit and watched with some satisfaction as the accompanying door slid down.
"No!" Anakin moaned, pounding his fists into the door.
Obi-Wan spun around to gaze at the fleet of gold and white now flashing amongst the blasts of red and blue. "This does not bode well, Anakin," he said in a gravely, tragic voice.
Did he always have to be such a drama queen? I mean… whoa.
"How are we supposed to get this door open?" Anakin asked, turning around and using the Force to lift the door. It took all of my concentration to keep the door down. "It won't budge!"
"You could say please."
Anakin froze, turning slowly to face Obi-Wan, who wore a look of utter confusion on his face. Slowly, they turned to face me. Standing there, with their lightsabers hanging from my belt, with my gun held forward, and with an evil glint in my eye, I watched as the two Jedi stared at me.
"If you're going to kill us, just get it over with," Obi-Wan said quietly.
"And why would I want to do that?" I asked innocently. Only, the voice talking out of my mouth sounded monotonic and mechanical. Stepping forward, I used what power I could from the Living Force and managed to open the door from the bottom up.
Stunned, Anakin and Obi-Wan turned to regard me just as I stepped through the door. I beckoned for them to follow with the gun and they didn't hesitate, especially when the destroyer droids came rolling through. I turned and smashed my fist into the control panel on the opposite door and it once again slid shut, sealing us off in a small enclave off of the main corridor.
"What the hell was that?" Anakin asked in a hushed voice.
"I think I know…" Obi-Wan whispered.
I turned to face them, returning into their hands each of their lightsabers. "If I had my body back, I'd be punning right about now."
x-o-x
Mainly because I've reached a crossroads, I'll just say it'll be the 'great escape'. After reading and rereading other stories, however, I've been getting ideas for another crossover. I need to finish my current works before I start anything else though, and in the beginning I did invest a lot of time into this! Comments, flames and questions will I except.